Ok! Here's chapter two!!! Just so you know, a molimer is just another one of Luna's beliefs, just thought I'd say because I don't in the fanficiton.

The 'ha greenbean no hyphen' was a note to a friend of mine, we had an argument over whether or not I should put a hyphen between e and crucio. So her name's greenbean.

Laying eggs through the mouth: dbz, the namekians do that, so it was a note to Shashuko. It worked, she laughed.

When I say Zetsu's right or left, I mean if you were looking at him. (Left black, right white.)

I DONT OWN BARELY ANY OF THIS!!!!!! Not the characters, settings (except the Akatsuki lounge.) etc. Thought you ought to know… faints

Nargirlnargirlnargirlnargirlnargirlnargirlnargirlnargirlnargirlnargirlnargirlnargirlnargirl

Itachi ducked into his quarters after what seemed like ages, and looked around for Luna. She had hidden herself well, he noted.

"Luna?" he called, walking deeper into the well-lit cave that was his room. "Come out."

She didn't appear to hear him, as no blonde head poked round out of the closet, or the cabinet.

So he walked swiftly to the back of the cave, calling her name. 'She had better answer.' Was his only thought.

"Luna"

Luna turned her head. She had been lying on her back in the cave she had found, staring at the clouds through the small hole in the ceiling.

She could have sworn she heard her name.

"Luna!"

It was her name! With a shock of realization, she jumped to her feet and scrambled down the dark tunnel until, a minute later, she shot out of the corner.

Itachi turned around at the sound, and pulled her into a hug. aawwww

"Thank goodness." He murmured so softly Luna could barely hear it. Luna just hugged him back.

"I assume you found a place to hide," Itachi said, when he finally let her go.

Luna nodded. "It's really great, as if it were tunneled by molimers." She pointed over to the corner tunnel that led to her cavern. "It's through a tunnel in that corner."

"Fascinating," Itachi murmured as he stooped to get a better look at the tunnel Luna had indicated. "It would be a tight fit for the rest of us, and I doubt any of the other Akatsuki members know about It." he stood straight again. "Good find."

Luna smiled. "Now you don't have to worry so much."

Itachi smiled too. "But I will anyway."

Luna's smile grew against her will.

The end

…

Yes, I was kidding. ONWARD!

Itachi was needed on some mission or other, so Luna was once again confined to her sunlit cave. Although she didn't think of it as confinement, she loved it there.

She wished she had her wand. ---

But for now she would make do with having Itachi; yes, that was nearly as good protection as any magic she could offer.

And magic couldn't hug you.

Luna decided to take the opportunity to look around her temporary quarters. (At least, she hoped they were temporary. However much she liked the cave, she still liked her room more.) Yesterday she had spent most of the time staring at clouds through the sunhole in the ceiling, and had observed that it was in a distorted shape, a cross between a star and an otter. And probably about big enough for someone to crawl through, if they got up there.

Today she looked around to the darker corners of the cave; the ones daylight did not reach. They looked slightly damp, she thought. And there were lots of mushrooms growing. Wow… what lovely patterns. Suppose they held the odd African spore toad? They could shrink themselves small enough to camouflage themselves into a toadstool's spot…

So she wandered over to the mushrooms. She bent down, and to her dismay found no miniature toads hiding amongst the brilliant spots smattered across the brightly colored fungus. But she did find something else.

The assorted mushrooms weren't growing. They weren't attached to the earth. They had been picked elsewhere, and brought here.

Which meant someone had brought them here.

Which meant someone could return.

Would return.

Anyone who doesn't see what's going to happen next deserves an e crucio. (Ha, greenbean. No hyphen.)

So it was just then that Luna heard footsteps. Echoing footsteps, the cave seemed to quiver under each one, she was so afraid. She ducked under the lowest eave she could find and wished desperately for her wand.

Or Itachi.

The crashing footsteps slowed to a stop. There was the scrape of something against rock, and over the edge of Luna's cloud-gazing pool of light popped a face.

Not a face.

A mask.

And then he was entering the Cave, lowering himself through the hole in the ceiling, letting himself drop down to the light stone floor, his black and red cloak that matched Itachi's billowing around him as he landed.

Luna shrank into the shadows, wishing she had the invisibility cloak Hallow her father told her about. The faceless cloaked figure bounced – bounced – to the collection of mushrooms that he had hidden away in Luna's sanctuary.

Which was no longer a sanctuary, it seemed.

The mysterious yet unexpectedly good-tempered Akatsuki member continued on his way, depositing more mushrooms still onto a raised stone and proceeding to sort them into all sorts of piles and patterns that Luna could make no sense of. (Which is saying something.)

Minutes passed. Or were they hours? They felt like years. Finally, the eccentric mushroom collector stood up, satisfied. He turned to the spot where light shone brightest, underneath the skylight.

And turned back.

To stare right at Luna.

Terror stole breath from her lungs, her mind froze and she felt her heart stop, and all her other vital organs got damaged in some odd way too.

He raised a hand.

Luna flinched.

"Hi!!!"

He was waving at her.

In a friendly manner.

Luna raised a tentative hand and waved back. Which encouraged him enough to come over and squat beside her. "Who 'r you?" he asked her cheerfully.

Luna stared at him in disbelief. This wasn't what she'd pictured the Akatsuki like. "I'm…" she hesitated, wondering if she ought to tell him who she was. But her name couldn't hurt. "Luna."

"I'm Tobi!" Tobi said, and Luna wished she could see his expression beneath the swirly orange mask he kept over his features.

"Hello, Tobi."

Tobi seemed to beam at her from beneath his mask, although Luna couldn't quite tell.

"Why are you here?"

Luna did not answer. Tobi waited for a moment then cocked his head to the side.

"You must be Itachi's friend!" He exclaimed, and Luna could tell he knew it was true from the shock in her unblinking blue eyes.

There was silence as Tobi waited for her to say something. When she did not, he asked again. "What brings you here?"

"I was looking for an African spore toad." Luna answered. "They're really rare, Daddy would love a specimen to prove his theory that they reproduce by laying eggs through their mouths." (Sound familiar?)

"Ooh, I've heard of them!" Tobi jumped up from his sitting position and held out a hand to help Luna up. She took it warily. "They live in the spots on a toadstool, right?"

"Yes! You know, there aren't very many people who believe they even exist. Just because no one's seen one for centuries does not mean they've died out." Luna smiled.

"It's like what they said about crumplehorned snorkacks." Tobi agreed.

The hour passed, or was it minutes. It felt like seconds. Luna and Tobi talked about all sorts of things- the tidy chiddbuckett, thestrals, (because even if you don't understand them, when you kill so much it's hard to avoid them.) hard to find rocks that glimmered like a newfallen snow, and the African spore toad.

"Luna!" came the echoing call from the other end of the passageway to the Mushroom cave. "Luna, are you there?"

The wide-eyed witch leapt to her feet. "Ah!" she remarked. "I've got to go."

"Okay!" Tobi called after her as she knelt to enter the tunnel that led to the voice she had missed hearing. "See you later!"

Itachi could hear Luna's footsteps echoing inside the tunnel, drowning out the second voice he was certain he had heard.

He was worried sick.

As soon as Luna's shoulders appeared in the corner, Itachi pulled her out and to her feet. He gave her a quick hug, then said,

"There was someone there."

Luna nodded, but she didn't seem worried about it. Itachi calmed a bit, they hadn't harmed Luna, she was most certainly in one piece. "It was Tobi," Luna Explained. "Apparently there was someone who knew about that cave."

Tobi. Tobi wasn't the worst that could have happened. He at the very least didn't have the brains to go telling the whole clan Luna was still alive.

Or maybe he had just the right amount of brains to do something stupid like that.

"Kisaaaaa-aaaaaame!!!!" Tobi yelled, running as fast as he could in an annoying cloak. Why did they where these things again? They were rather cumbersome… they were useful for storing things in, true…

"What is it, Tobi?" Kisame grumbled, turning his head at last from the comfy chair he sat in.

"It's-! It's-! It's-!"

"What."

Tobi thought for a moment.

"I forgot."

Kisame groaned. "Go spy on Itachi or something." He turned back to his book, which was a version of 'Jaws'.

"Oooooo! Oo! Oo! Oo!!!!! Tobi raised his hand and waved it about madly.

Kisame glared at him. "What?" he hissed through his pointy teeth.

"I remember!"

All he earned for his memory was a cold glare. "And?" Kisame prompted, knowing he'd never get rid of Tobi otherwise.

"I found Luna!"

Kisame Jumped up. There was only one person Luna could be- Itachi's little treasure.

"She's still alive?" It even surprised him a little. He wondered if underneath it all he never really believed it himself.

"Alive and very well." Tobi said proudly. "She went running when Itachi called her."

Kisame grinned his fishy grin. "Excellent work, Tobi. Now run along."

Tobi ran out of the room, yelling behind him, "Tobi is a good spy!"

Just to clue you in, Kisame is doing this to get Itachi in trouble for once. Itachi's always the perfect villain, never messes up and gets yelled at. So here was Kisame's chance to not be the one who slipped up. To watch leader-san yell at someone else. To watch him yell at Itachi. Heh heh…

Itachi Stormed through the labyrinth of underground tunnels until he found what he was looking for.

Kisame was leaning against a curved tunnel wall with a forebodingly smug look upon his teal features. Itachi glided menacingly over and stared at Kisame. Who avoided his gaze, for obvious reasons.

"What did you put him up to," he breathed.

"Who." Kisame stalled lazily.

"Tobi, you miserable clownfish, Tobi! What did you tell him??" Itachi hissed, holding Kisame against the wall with one hand. Which isn't easy to do, but this is Itachi.

"I didn't tell him to do anything!"

"Liar. Tell me."

"Nothing! Honestly!"

"You're never honest. You told me you had our target, but look how that turned out."

"Pretty well, for you." Kisame grinned tauntingly. "Or did it."

Itachi threw Kisame from the wall and ran off to go find Tobi himself. This was looking serious.

Da da da!

The intercom Leader had had installed turned on. Itachi groaned, but stopped to listen.

"Itachi. Please report to my cavern, now."

Di di di!

Itachi didn't move. What had that jellyfish done.

Da da da!

"Now."

Di di di!

And so he had no choice. But he swore, he'd save Luna, then kill Kisame.

"Itachi?"

Itachi stepped into the shadowy cave that Leader-san used as his office. Lair, he liked to call it. But it was just a cave. "Yes."

Leader turned in his comfy swivelly chair, which he thought made him seem daunting, into where a shadow crossed his pierced face. "I have heard the most… amusing rumor about you," he murmured, and Itachi stiffened. "Yes," he continued, "I see you've heard it too."

Itachi didn't answer. So Pein went on. "Apparently, Kisame made another costly blunder. And do you know what I hear?"

He stared at Itachi from the shadows. "No." Itachi answered.

"I hear you've taken a liking to the girl. Decided to keep her. What's so special about her?"

Itachi did not know how to answer that. There were plenty special things about Luna, so very many, but none he was willing to mention. It's not like he could describe her permanently surprised eyes, or her sweet scent to Leader-san. So he stayed silent.

"Nothing, huh?"

Itachi gritted his teeth and said nothing.

"Bring her too me. Let me see for myself."

Itachi froze. What if she was killed? It was all too possible, it's not like Leader san would see anything interesting in the extraordinary girl that he hid.

"Itachi?"

"No."

"No?" a bemused Pein analyzed him from the dark corner of his desk. "We can't bring her in just because I tell you to, yes? There is a reason I am the leader of the Akatsuki, Itachi," Pein Hissed, drawing himself to his full height, out of his chair. "I could kick you out of here faster than (Snape confronted with shampoo) Kisame can swing that dumb sword of his!"

To be kicked out of the Akatsuki? That would be it. What would he do next? Take Luna and go, he supposed. Do nothing.

But he still couldn't sacrifice Luna. He stood his ground, pale though he was. "No."

"Bring her in, or I'll hunt her down and Kill her now."

"You'll kill her if I bring her anyway."

Leader's expression went from menacing from surprised. "Kill her? Not yet, Itachi. Not yet. For now I simply want to know what you see in her. Bring her."

Itachi relaxed fractionally, and turned to fetch Luna. There was nothing he could do at this point.

"He wants to see me?"

"Yes," Itachi told the innocent blonde witch as they hurried down the dark earthy halls toward Leader-san's 'Lair'. "But I don't think you're in any immediate danger. At least, I hope you're not," he added in a dark growl under his breath, his hand holding Luna's tighter.

Luna said nothing in response, but drew herself in closer to him.

They rounded on the entrance to Leader-san's cave, and Itachi took a deep breath and led Luna into the dimly lit cave.

"You have returned, Itachi."

Itachi was sorely tempted to make an unfriendly remark about stating the obvious, but held his tongue. "Yes." He replied instead.

"And this is the girl?" Pein's eyebrows rose. "She's a bit plain. Doesn't seem your type, Itachi."

Itachi resisted the temptation to knock his lights out, or even protest. Luna caught his eye, and he looked away. He couldn't let himself get carried away in her eyes.

"What is your name?"

Luna seemed to start at being addressed. "Luna Lovegood." She said hesitantly.

"Well, Luna, I-"

And he stopped. He frowned.

Itachi shivered. It was cold. Too cold. This wasn't normal. Luna and Pein felt it too, he could tell bet he way Luna drew closer to him and the way Pein shrunk into his chair. Then Luna whimpered slightly. Itachi glanced at her pretty face and saw terror clutching at her features as she gazed into space out the entrance of Leader-san's office. Itachi didn't see anything, but felt horrible.

Like all the happiness has bean sucked out of the air. Out of his life. None of the joy Luna had brought him seemed to remain. And he began to remember horrible things.

The funny thing was, Leader-san was staring with the same horror as Luna right outside his office, at the same spot as Luna. They both looked about to collapse- Leader-san especially.

It was a dementor. How- why- was a dementor here? Why now, when she didn't have her wand? How would she defend herself, how would she defend Itachi? Itachi did not have a defense fort his sort of thing. Luna felt week in the knees and held onto Itachi for Support. And Comfort. But Itachi was Shivering.

The cold shadow man that sat at the desk addressed her sharply.

"Luna."

Luna looked away from the dementor, trying desperately to fight for a clear mind.

"You see it, don't you." The man Itachi had brought her too said softly. "You see it."

Luna gulped and nodded. Could he see the dementor? How? Was he, too, a magical being?

"Drive it away," He pleaded, "Do something."

She looked at him desperately. "My wand. I don't have my wand." she explained, throwing caution into the wind.

He rummaged in his desk for about three seconds, and then threw her a long dark stick that could only be a wand. She grabbed it and knew that it was.

But there was not more time to be wasted. She grabbed Itachi's hand and pulled him close, thinking only of him.

"EXPECTO PATRONUM!"

A silvery shadow whisked out of her wand, transforming into a beautiful rabbit that hopped around the dark cloaked figure (the dementor, not Pein.) until it was driven away. Luna sent her Patronus to chase it out of the caves, all the way away, not just down the hall.

The wand she held felt funny. She hadn't noticed in her desperation, but it was very different from her own. She didn't like it at all, but it had been the best thing she had.

She turned, and walked slowly toward the relieved shadow man's desk and placed the wand on top of it.

Itachi slumped against the wall, and looked at her pleadingly.

She smiled at him, a weary, relieved smile, and helped him up.

"What was that?" he whispered hoarsely into her ear.

"Dementor." Luna whispered back. "You could not see it because you are not of magical decent. The strange thing is, your boss shouldn't be able to see it either. And he had a wand. Did you know…?"

They turned to look at Pein, who was turned the wand forlornly over in his fingers.

He looked up at them, and held the wand still in his hands. "I'm not a wizard." He murmured in response to their unspoken curiosity.

When Itachi and Luna continued to stare in confusion, He looked away. "I'm… a squib." He confessed quietly.

Luna's eyes showed recognition and understanding, While Itachi's stayed just as confused as they were before.

Luna looked up to him and explained quietly.

Itachi seemed to understand then, just as well.

There was silence for a moment, thoughts running through everyone's heads.

"Do you know where you left your wand?" Pein broke the silence.

"No." Luna shook her head.

"I couldn't find it when I went looking." Itachi added.

Pein thought for a moment. The Akatsuki could use the sort of power a witch could provide, but how to persuade her to join? By using Itachi, of course. If she stayed, she got to spend more time with him. He could not force her, because as soon a she got a wand and her power back, which he needed, she would have ultimate power over him. He mustn't let that become a problem. So maybe he could offer her…

"Luna." He spoke suddenly. "I can offer you a part time job in the Akatsuki. You would not, of course, be killed," he looked over at Itachi as he said this. "I could pay you in your currency, all though not very much, I haven't exactly been saving up sickles. You would be aloud to see your family and friends, as long as you did not tell them anything at all. You will, of course, need a new wand, if your old one simply can't be found."

Luna and Itachi looked at each other. Neither had expected anything like that.

Okay. You are reading this going, 'this is nuts. A dementor just happens to show up?' well, yes. That's all there is to that part. If you know your Harry potter, you'll know that 'shouldn't the ministry have them all under control now that Voldemort's gone?' well, the ministry have had a lot of getting back together to do, and The dementor didn't want to be rounded back up. So, the ministry has most of them, but there's always the odd free one that wonders into the odd cave to attack the odd leader of an evil corporation…

Now you can't say I got that wrong, because I have an excuse!

"Don't. Don't take the job, Luna, it's too dangerous. I don't want you hurt." Itachi frowned. Leader-san had given them time to think over the proposition, because… he felt like it, I guess.

"I won't be hurt, Itachi, But I can make sure you aren't either. It's much safer than fighting Voldemort in the Department of Mysteries, and I thought I did that quite well."

"Fought who?"

Luna sighed. "Voldemort. Menace of the Wizarding world. Friend of mine defeated him. We've been over this before…"

"You fought too?" Itachi looked slightly horrified.

Luna caught it. "I'm fine, though," she said. "And through the process I made friends."

Itachi looked down. He still didn't want that sort of risk imposed on Luna, even if she had been through worse. Which he didn't like either.

"Well," Luna said decidedly. "I'm taking the Job." She'd be back in action- except nowhere near as much. And she'd get to spend more time with Itachi, which was her main motive.

"You're not."

"Like you can stop me."

"I'll tie you to the wall."

"I'll put you in the full bodybind."

"You haven't got a wand.

"Not yet I haven't."

Luna stared defiantly into Itachi's gleaming red eyes and saw, not the determination she had expected, but desperation.

She looked down and shook her head. "I won't be hurt," she promised. "I won't do anything so dangerous my wand can't get me out of it."

Itachi walked over and hugged her protectively. "The thing is," he told her softly, "You can't always see it coming."

"I never did take divination."

Itachi smiled, and sat, her hand still clasped in his, down onto the sofa. "Exactly."

But Luna shook her head again, and sat down next to him. "I want to do this. This is a chance to do something again, something more than harvesting plimpies."

"Whats?"

But Luna did not answer. She laid her head down on his shoulder, and simply held his hand.

"You're still not taking the job."

"I am."

"She's not taking the job."

"I am."

"She is or isn't?" Leader-san smiled form the shadows.

"I am accepting your offer with gratitude." Luna said firmly.

"She is declining with grace." Itachi added.

"It seems you would like to join, Luna." Leader-san said, nodding to himself. He ignored Itachi, who was glowering in the corner.

"I do." Luna said. "Your terms are fair. If you will let me simply visit Home to acquire a new wand I will be back to start whenever it is convenient." She had assumed that being polite was the best way to start with the new boss. She wondered, was she overdoing it…?

Itachi shot her a look, and she smiled at him. "I will be careful."

Itachi was not appeased. (He needed a shrubbery.)

Pein sighed. "If you would prefer it, Itachi, I can add Luna to your group of you and Kisame. With her we have the odd pair anyway, so we might as well make it a trio. That way you can protect her all you want." Pein was so good sometimes…

Itachi had his shrubbery. Now let's see Leader-san cut down the tallest tree in the forest with a herring. But for now, he would take what he could get. There was no dissuading Luna now, not now that Leader-san was there to convince as well.

"Thank you." He said stiffly, and Luna recognized defeat and went over to hug him in thanks.

"It seems al has worked out well." Pein leaned back in his chair, considering putting up his feet on the desk as well, for effect. But he didn't. "Itachi, if you would escort her down to the Akatsuki lounge I should announce over the speaker her arrival and you should introduce her to her new comrades.

Itachi nodded briefly, and took Luna's warm hand. They exited the room together.

Da da da!

"Attention, Akatsuki…"

Itachi and Luna, hand in hand, were walking rapidly toward the lounge. As Leader-san finished his explanation, which excluded the fact that Luna was a witch, only that she had a very special jutsu up her sleeve that only she could use, they came into view of the entrance.

The room was void of its usual dull clamor, there was only silence. All eyes, including Zetsu's left, were on Luna and Itachi as they proceeded into the furnished cave, their footsteps echoing dauntingly.

Itachi stopped; Luna followed suit. Everyone was staring- Luna looked down.

"Luna Lovegood." Itachi said, breaking the silence reluctantly, motioning toward her. "Luna, the Akatsuki." He pointed to each of them in turn- they were all there. "Kakuzu, Deidara, Tobi, Zetsu, Kisame, Hidan, Konan."

Nobody moved, except Luna, who smiled meekly. "Hello." She was still looking at the floor.

She got no response. Except for Tobi.

"Hi Luna!"

Luna looked up gratefully. "Hi, Tobi." She smiled a little wider. Tobi motioned for her to sit next to him on the couch, and she looked up at Itachi, who nodded.

At least Tobi would be friendly. It was best to get Luna as comfortable as possible around the Akatsuki. And that meant letting her socialize.

It still felt awkward letting her run off when he had spent the last week protecting her from sight.

Luna shuffled forward and sat down next to Tobi, who asked her something about oddly colored lice, and a small conversation was started.

It could be heard clearly, as no one else made any noise.

"No, only on penguins."

"But I heard that sometimes you find them on walruses, are you sure?"

"They could be on walruses, if they had jumped off the penguins."

"Where do you find all this stuff out?"

"Oh, Daddy runs a magazine of these things. A year or two ago someone sent in a page and a half article on why they prefer penguins in Madagascar to penguins down on Antarctica."

"Wow!"

Somebody snorted.

Luna looked up. Behind the couch stood Zetsu.

"Surely you don't believe in your stupid penguin lice."

"There have been sightings, you know." Luna said stubbornly, looking up at him with her wide blue eyes.

"Sure. About as many sightings as there have been of a dragon." Zetsu rolled his eyes.

"Oh, there aren't that many."

Zetsu looked at her funny. (With one half of his face. The other half was laughing.)

"I mean- yeah." Luna winced. She was dealing with muggles, who didn't think Dragons existed. Whoops. She couldn't blow this secret.

Zetsu shook his head, half of him still laughing. "You are bizarre," his multicolored self said together, from inside his giant flytrap.

"If you haven't noticed, Zetsu…" Kakuzu trailed off, coming up to the couch as well.

"Like you're one to talk." Konan rolled her eyes. "You've got six faces."

"The better to see you with."

"Shut up."

"You've got six faces?" Luna asked. "That's unusual."

"Yeah, they're on his back," Konan assured her. "It's creepy."

"What's creepy is your face."

"How can you even use a lame line like that?" Deidara piped up from his chair in the corner. "That line is for losers who can't come up with a satisfactory line on their own."

"You're just jealous."

Zetsu's right side laughed harder. Deidara's eyes (eye?) narrowed. "Jealous, of a ten eyed freak like you? I don't think so."

"I can see the back of my head." (In a mirror)

"I can see the back of you head too."

"I can see your face."

"Ugh, shut the &!$ up!" Hidan moaned. "Deidara was right, you have no brains."

"There was a money sign in that swear." Kakuzu noted.

"One track mind or what?" Konan grinned at Luna.

Before long, everyone was laughing about jabs at Kakuzu, except Kakuzu himself, Itachi, (who was just watching.) and Kisame.

Kisame was sulking in a corner.

Itachi walked over to him. "Kisame."

"What." Kisame grunted, not looking up from the rubber band he'd been toying with.

Itachi slapped him. (Really, really hard, this is Itachi we're talking about.)

Kisame was sent staggering into the coffee table and tripped over it, sending the right side of Zetsu into another hysterical fit of laughter that spread to the rest of the Akatsuki. Itachi giggled a bit himself. (Except I can't see Itachi giggling. But he did.)

Luna was sent out the next day, to acquire a wand and fix whatever she needed to do with her family and friends. She was greeted with hugs and kisses from her dad, who had been worried sick. She told him she'd gotten a part time job and would be out every other week, but wouldn't tell him where. She went to the ministry of magic and got special permission (don't ask me how) to work in such close proximity to muggles, as long as they wrote it off to an odd jutsu. (Except Itachi, who was allowed to keep his memories.)

A few days after that, she returned to the Akatsuki. This time, she had her wand, and a trunk full of robes (everyone else dressed strangely, why shouldn't she?) and a few old schoolbooks for review. (Wit beyond measure is man's greatest treasure!) She was assigned her own cave, which she furnished with furniture she bought with some money she had saved up, and pictures of all her friends (aren't friends great?) as well as a few magical items she brought for home comfort. (She made sure they had anti-muggle charms on them so they looked like ordinary trinkets to the Akatsuki.)

Obla-di, Obla-da, life goes on.

So, you know, you'd think it was happy endings all around. Itachi and Luna get to be together, Luna isn't trapped, she is comfortable enough with the Akatsuki, and Kisame, who is for my purposes the villain of this story, got his in the end.
But you've forgotten something.

Or maybe you remembered and thought I'd forgotten.

You're wrong.

I remembered perfectly well.

Now let's find out, what will Deidara do?

theycallmetheweaseltheycallmetheweaseltheycallmetheweaseltheycalmetheweasel

I KNOW Tobi shouldn't have a clue thestrals etc exist, but I needed something for tem to bond over. Please excuse my blunder, although I did it on purpose.

Itachi and his shrubbery/herring? Monty Python's Holy Grail. What I meant was that Itachi didn't just want to be able to be there when she was in danger, he didn't want her in danger at all. But you take what you can get.

(Actually, I just added the shrubbery bit because the word appease reminds me of the knights who say Ni)

Originally, 'the better to see you with' was not a pick up line, but it sounds so much like one that it is, officially. So… Kakuzu likes Konan? Maybe he was just teasing. It's your call.

It was Dianna's ideas for Pein to be a squib. She gets credit for it.

Okay! That's a wrap. I'm working now on part 2, although I can't promise it'll be anytime soon. Soon enough. Just not within the week or something stupid like that. It's blackmailing Itachi, which is also from the im conversations. I really hope you liked it, please please please please PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE review. I will be grateful.