A/N: Right, so I may have accidentally spent a couple of days just staring at my computer typing away... because I get lost like that from time to time. So enjoy the result of me losing some hours of my life. No, but seriously, I hope you all enjoy!
Chapter 2: Weight of the World
When Arryn woke up the sun still hadn't peaked over the horizon and Lena was sound asleep. Quickly and quietly she went about her routine and used the french press to brew a dark roast, then made a simple toast with avocado and cherry tomatoes. She lay out the plate and poured the coffee into a mug to set by it.
"What are you doing?" A whisper in the night caused her to whip around.
"Rao you nearly gave me a heart attack!" Arryn clutched at her chest; she had rarely ever been snuck up on before..
"You know Rao?"
"Umm no, it's just what they say in the future." Arryn lied; it's what her mother said a lot, and she said she had picked it up from Supergirl. "Anyways, I'm making mother breakfast."
"That's so sweet, it smells so good." Kara sniffed at the air. "Lena will be so happy since she's always skipping meals."
"Do you want one?" Arryn asked somewhat bashfully as Kara drooled over the toast. "Just eat that one, I'll make another."
Kara smiled wide and scarfed down the toast almost as quickly as Arryn made another using her superspeed. She couldn't help but feel warm when she caught sight of Kara's light blue eyes glint with joy as she smeared avocado all over her face. She handed Kara a napkin and chuckled as she hurriedly wiped all over her face.
"That was good," Kara hummed and then eyed the other one.
"Don't even think about it," Arryn playfully threatened. "Come on, let's go."
Kara groaned but followed the girl as she super sped and flew off the balcony. They arrived at the DEO in record time and Kara for the first time in a long time (probably not since she raced Barry) was out of breath. She observed Arryn and was surprised that she looked perfectly composed. It hadn't phased her one bit.
"Geez you're not even out of breath," Kara said between deep breaths.
"The air is pretty clear today," Arryn responded casually and contained the shudder that threatened to betray her calm demeanor. On her Earth the air was contaminated, hardly breathable for someone like her. "Anyways, what will I be doing all day? Please don't say you're going to put me in a room and ask all kinds of useless questions."
"As fun as that would be, we have other interests." Alex jested and gave Kara a welcoming hug. "We're going to test your powers."
"Here? In this shiny, breakable looking building with hundreds of humans in it?" Arryn asked.
"There's a lower level with less breakable things." Kara offered optimistically and patted Arryn's shoulder. "Don't worry so much."
Arryn nodded hesitantly and followed the two women into an elevator. She listened quietly as Alex and Kara caught up on some late night episode. It was strange to see Supergirl so easy going; it was such a stark contrast to the vids she watched back home. For so long she had thought her kryptonian mother was a woman of cold, hard steel… a woman capable of making the ultimate sacrifice. Instead she was turning out to be a toast-scarfing, aloof and light-hearted girl that flew around in a red mini-skirt.
"Alright let's begin," Alex commanded as she wrapped her knuckles and stepped into the middle of what Arryn assumed was a fighting ring.
"Ummm shouldn't I fight with her?" Arryn pointed at Kara who casually leaned against the wall with her arms crossed and a smirk plastered on her face. "No offense, but I could accidentally kill you."
"We'll see about that," Alex hit a button on her watch and suddenly the room emitted a light green light.
Kryptonite. Arryn's eyes dilated as she took in the familiar green hue and glanced at Kara. She looked stable, if but a bit tired. She could feel the light hovering above her like a suffocatingly heavy, needle-ridden blanket, but she had lived through worse. She rolled her shoulders back and focused her energy; she needed to fool Supergirl for now.
Alex lunged forward with tactical preciseness, but Arryn was faster. She shifted to the side and took hold of Alex's arm, only to throw her at the shocked Kryptonian. Alex gasped as she collided with the girl of steel and thanked the heavens that she wasn't as thick as a statue with the kryptonite emitters on. However that also meant that Kara was in no position to catch her, so they both collapsed on the ground.
"Sorry," Arryn walked towards the groaning duo and helped them off the floor.
"You're at full strength?" Alex asked.
Arryn nodded; her training had made her resilient to this level of kryptonite.
"I told you it wouldn't work… she'd have to be kryptonian." Kara rubbed the back of her neck. "Which would also mean that Lena would've made a super baby with a… male kryptonian." Kara let out a sigh of relief, "thank Rao, that's not the case."
"Jealous, are we?" Arryn teased.
"No, but the only kryptonian male is my cousin, who is happily married to another human." Kara stated matter of factly. "Either way it's safe to say you're not kryptonian since kryptonite has no affect on you. Wait, what if..." Kara bit her lip and then grabbed Alex's wrist to change the settings in the sparring room.
Arryn analyzed the vents as they blew softly and could see the tiny molecular bits of lead that flew out. She flew up to examine the vents and looked back down at Kara who was smiling up at her. She gave her a raised brow on her descent and waited for an explanation.
"Oh wow you really look a lot like Lena when you do that," Kara stated somewhat absentmindedly. "And it looks like you're not affected by lead either, so that's great!"
"Really Supergirl? You thought she was half Daxamite?" Alex muttered.
"His powers were kinda the same." Kara shrugged.
"Yeah but Lena doesn't have the same bad tastes that you do. She would never."
"Hey that's not fair, he ended up being a decent superhero after time traveling and all."
"Still I doubt mother would want your sloppy seconds." Arryn picked up on the conversation and received a chuckle from Alex. "And I know for a fact that he is not my father. Regardless I thought we were training, not playing some strange game show where you try and guess the other half of my DNA by exploiting my weaknesses."
"Would it kill you to tell us though?" Kara whined.
"Maybe you should figure out why it bothers you so much first," Arryn responded and caught how Kara's brow scrunched together. "Then I'll tell you."
Kara slumped her shoulders in defeat but pushed no further. They switched up their training methods and put Arryn through a few environments to see how well she'd react. Kara and Alex watched from behind the barrier and barely contained their awe when their jaws dropped. She was fast, precise and elegant in her movements. She had the same powers as Kara and Clark, but her ability to wield them seemed more refined. At some point she had used both her laser vision and freeze breathe instantaneously to cripple the leg of a large robot (Winn had assured Alex that the day would come when she would thank him for training Kara to take down killer robots).
The simulation ended and Arryn walked back into the observation room as casually as ever; not a drop of sweat on her.
"Golly…" Kara gulped and looked the girl up and down. "Lena sure knows how to make a super baby."
Arryn let out an uncharacteristic snort of laughter and quickly tried to play it off, but she couldn't help but feel caught off guard by the blonde's comments. Once she regained her composure, she glanced at Alex. She recognized the woman from the vids as well, and her mother had told her many fond tales of the woman who led the rebellion. Perhaps she could recruit her help.
"May I speak with you alone?" Arryn requested.
"Yeah, of course, Supergirl, do you mind?"
"Of course not, I think I hear a siren in the distance anyways." Kara excused herself and took off.
Arryn sat on a nearby chair and twirled a bit before stopping and focusing her gaze on Alex.
'If you don't mind, I'd prefer we communicate telepathically.'
Alex's eyes widened as Arryn's voice echoed in her mind but her lips remained perfectly still.
"Why?" Alex asked aloud.
'She does have super hearing, you know.'
"Right, ok, I'll give it a try." Alex huffed and tried to focus by furrowing her brows. 'Is it working?'
Arryn smiled, 'perfect, I knew you had some brains to go with that brawn, but seriously relax, your face might stay that way.'
'Shut up,' Alex rolled her eyes. 'So, ready to share something useful?'
Arryn nodded, 'so you know I'm from the future and that Lena and Supergirl are my parents.'
'So you say, but I'm not convinced. If you were Kryptonian then the kryptonite would have weakened you back in the sparring room.'
Arryn shook her head, 'not if I've been conditioned to adapt to certain levels. You see… in my time, the air is laced with it.'
'But that would…'
'My mother built shields and we lived underground.'
'You, Lena and...?'
Arryn frowned and shook her head, 'in my time, I am the last Kryptonian. I never knew my other mother personally. Sometimes I would find old, banned vids… news stories of Supergirl. She was fierce… strong, but not invincible.'
'God…' Alex's bottom lip quivered.
'I was sent back to prevent that future… but I was supposed to appear when my mother was already with Supergirl. I fear telling either of them now will not help my mission. Therefore, my primary goal is to get that oblivious blonde to confess to my mother.' Arryn smiled gently and looked determined. 'Shouldn't be that hard, right? But I might need your help.'
Alex took a deep breath and unclenched her fists; she felt a knot forming at her chest. The strange girl could still be lying to her; her story could very well be a fabrication meant to throw her off her game… or it could be real. She looked into Arryn's eyes and found hints of Kara's blue looking back at her.
Kara.
That's right… Alex replayed her interactions with Arryn and realized that the young girl only ever referred to her other mother as Supergirl. Her watch buzzed and when she looked down at it, it was a message from Kara.
"Come with me, I want you to see something. But first, you'll need a few items." Alex turned to a locker nearby and grabbed a light sweater with a hoodie and some shades. Arryn raised her brow. "You really do look like Lena when you do that; anyways let's go."
Arryn followed and groaned when they neared the garage. She really did hate car rides. She was about to complain when Alex shoved a helmet in her hands. She looked at it, slightly befuddled, but when she looked up and saw Alex approaching a sleek looking machine, she smiled. Excitedly she pulled the helmet over her head and strapped it into place before hopping on.
When Alex took off down the street at an accelerated speed, Arryn loved the feeling of cutting through the wind. It wasn't nearly as intense as flying, but it was much better than being in a car. They pulled into a cafe and Alex instructed her to pull her hood up and keep her shades on. The young girl did as she was told and followed Alex to a corner table. When they sat, Arryn caught sight of her mother and would have called out, but she looked so happy listening to whoever was sitting across from her.
"Rao...she really has a thing for blondes." Arryn muttered. "At least this one is more sensible with her fashion."
Alex laughed, "you think her clothes are fashionable?"
Arryn shrugged, "I'd take pants and a cardigan over a stupid skirt anyday." She observed the woman closer and was alarmed by her beauty. "Who is she?"
Alex watched Arryn's curious expression and thought it was really cute that the girl with super powers couldn't see past Kara's disguise.
"Seems as though my mother just played the field before settling with Supergirl. First James who is all tall, dark and handsome, and now it's some cute, bubbly, ray of sunshine girl," Arryn sighed and fell back into the booth. "I've never seen her look like that."
"What do you mean?"
"So happy..." Arryn murmured. "Why show me this?"
Alex cleared her throat, "well, I wanted to introduce you to Kara."
"Is that her name? Rao even her name is beautiful...I think...I've heard it before," Arryn crossed her arms, "well, I think I'll go introduce myself to this Kara."
"Wait, Arryn, no!" Alex tried to pull her back, but restraining a super-powered teen was nearly impossible.
Arryn walked to Lena's table nonchalantly and pulled a chair so that she could sit at the edge. She lowered her shades and glanced at her mother and gave Kara a wary look.
"Arryn!" Lena exclaimed and looked around to see if anyone was accompanying her.
"Hello...Lena," it felt strange calling her mother by her first name. "And you are?"
"Oh, I'm Kara-"
"And what are you to my ermmm...aunt?" Arryn asked and cut Kara off.
"I, I'm a reporter at CatCo. Lena's my boss and best friend."
"Good, that's how it should remain. You are not the blonde she's going to end up with." Arryn stated decisively much to Lena's horror.
"Arryn what are you doing?" Lena hissed.
"I see the way you look at her… you didn't even look at James like that, but you can't be sidetracked." Arryn defended her actions and held her mother's hostile gaze. "You don't belong with her."
"Who should she be with then?" Kara asked, clearly irritated much to Lena's surprise.
"Someone more powerful… though she really should ditch the skirt." Arryn muttered as she looked back at Kara. "I do like your clothes more."
"Rao… I mean wow… golly, thanks." Kara stammered; her brain slowly malfunctioning.
Arryn threw Kara a wary glance; did she just say Rao and golly?
"So Supergirl then…" Kara stated somewhat in a daze. "Supergirl who I sometimes have coffee as.. with, I mean with."
"You're friends with her? Rao could this get any worse?" Arryn asked, dropping her suspicions and assuming she had picked up her mannerisms from Supergirl. "Look, you seem like a nice lady… I mean you seem way more cute and reliable than that skirt-wearing superhero, but... " Arryn stopped and felt terrible. Her mother had been in love with another human… a nice human who wore pastel cardigans. If it weren't for Supergirl, maybe her mother would have lived a normal, happy life… without her, without all those nights crying. She had heard her mother cry out for a 'Kara' on some nights. Her heart ached and she felt her eyes grow wet so she pushed her shades back up. "Actually… maybe I'm wrong, or at the very least, I don't know what's right anymore. I'm sorry, Kara...Lena… excuse me," her voice cracked on her mother's name and she stood to leave.
She hurried out of the cafe, the sounds drowning in the heavy thumps of her heart, and quickly she took to the sky. She could hear her mother call out to her, but she blocked her out as she broke through the atmosphere. Back in her time, sometimes, when she was angry, she would drift far above into the atmosphere, above the contaminated air, above the darkness that she eventually had to return to. She recalled how incandescently happy her mother looked talking to that woman. Maybe… if she didn't end up with Supergirl, if she was never born, everything might be better. Her mother wouldn't be subject to hiding underground for the rest of her life; she'd have friends like the ones she talked about even in her sleep… she wouldn't cry so much.
Lena paced to and fro in her office, the click of her heels sounding at a constant staccato beat. Kara sat anxiously on the couch, biting her bottom lip occasionally as she watched Lena. She had walked the CEO back to her office after how distraught she seemed by Arryn's departure, but apart from telling her everything would be ok, Kara didn't know how else to comfort her.
"She was on the verge of crying and I just sat there," Lena muttered and clenched her hands into a fist. "I had plenty of time to say or do something before she left."
Kara stood and placed herself in Lena's path. She took Lena's clenched fists in each of her hands and glanced into her light green eyes. She wasn't sure what she wanted to say, or what Lena needed to hear, but she was tired of just sitting on the sidelines while Lena kept taking the brunt of the burden.
"You can't keep blaming yourself, I was there too... " Kara spoke softly as she began making patterns with her thumbs to relax Lena's hands. "I know it might not be my place, but I will always be here for you Lena, so you don't to carry all of this alone."
Lena felt her heart skip a beat as Kara's sterling blue eyes held hers so firmly. She felt her body leaning closer to the reporter's, the more Kara massaged her palms with the movements of her thumbs. She wanted to lay her head on Kara's shoulder, to feel her strong arms wrap around her and hold her tightly… and to feel her body fit right into hers.
"Do you like me?" Kara's voice carried with a shake and Lena wondered if it was fear or something else.
Lena gave a half ways nod before explaining, "but it's more than that. I love you, Kara." She hadn't expected to confess, not now, but she wanted Kara to understand just how deep her feelings were. "When I'm with you, I feel like anything is possible."
Kara's lips pulled into a smile, "me too… I mean, I also feel the same when I'm with you." Kara leaned closer and felt her body shiver; she had never been this close. Her gaze flicked to Lena's lips and back to her eyes. "But… what about Supergirl?"
Lena sighed and took a step back, but kept her hands in Kara's. "I'll always love you before her… does that make sense?"
"I...I think so," the blonde responded. Kara wasn't sure what to make of Lena's answer. "Maybe we should all talk; I think there are some things…"
Lena's cell rang and Alex's name rolled across her screen. She gave Kara an apologetic glance as she withdrew and walked over to her desk.
"Hello," she answered.
"Lena you need to get over here, now." Alex demanded.
"Why? What's happened?" Lena asked, her stomach sinking.
"I was at my desk, and suddenly a black journal appeared from thin air and was resting on my lap."
Lena arched a brow, "and?"
"And it's hers, Lena. It's a journal from the future."
By the time Arryn returned, night had fallen over National City. She perched herself on top of the L Corp. building and scanned the area. Her mother wasn't at her office, so she dropped down to the balcony and sat on the comfortable patio chairs.
"Thought I'd find you here," a strong voice came from above. "Like mother, like daughter."
Arryn gave the superhero a tired look before glancing away; she wasn't in the mood to be hassled. "Leave me alone."
"She's worried sick you know?" Kara spoke softly.
"I left her in good hands, a pretty blonde you might know… Kara."
"Oh, right, Ms. Danvers…" Kara blushed.
"Who my mother's completely smitten with…and I can't blame her."
"Does it bother you?"
"Bother me?" Arryn's face twisted before she slumped further in her chair. "Does it bother me that for the first time ever I saw her smile and laugh completely free of pain? My entire existence… I just… I wish I didn't exist."
"Don't say that," Kara took hold of the girl's hand and sat by her. "She's probably never had anyone make her breakfast until today… she said she thought it was very sweet and exactly what she needed."
"Aren't you in love with her? I thought she was in love with you too until I saw her with that girl. I mean not that it matters..." Arryn bit on her tongue. She was treading on a thin line and confessing to Supergirl seemed even less appealing than before.
Kara chuckled much to Arryn's astonishment. "I'm honestly the most oblivious person in the universe...but I know now… what you are to me and Lena."
Arryn swallowed hard and focused on her breathing. "Like I said before it doesn't matter...I'm not going to force her to choose you over Kara."
"Do you think… Lena could love us both?"
"Both?" Arryn's eyes nearly popped out and she drew her hand out of Supergirl's. She wasn't aware that Supergirl was such an open-minded individual. "Oh Rao… are you also in love with Kara Cardigan Danvers? Are you all just…" Arryn stopped as mortification turned into petrification.
"Rao… where does your mind go?" Kara snapped with embarrassment. "That's not what I meant…also what did you just call her? She doesn't always wear cardigans just so you know," she rambled and sighed. "Maybe we should all talk, soon. Until then you should go home."
Arryn nodded and flew to the loft. She wanted to ask Supergirl where her home was and if she could stay with her, but for all she knew, she had a bunk at the DEO. When she slid in through the balcony, she noticed no lights were on. She scanned the rooms and sighed-no one was home. Her body ached from her atmosphere drifting activities and inside she felt weak and hollow.
Meanwhile at the DEO, Lena was rifling through a black journal.
May 15 5AS,
I'm not sure what I'm going to do yet, but I learned in this really old book that there is a day for mothers. I'm going to make mine the most beautiful gift, I just need to go above and find some coal. Then I can carve it into our sigil and it'll sparkle like the last time I lasered one. I should stop writing, I can hear her crying, so I'll go cuddle and make sure there's no water on her face :)
June 25 5AS,
I got sick when I went above, but I got the coal. But I was too sick to use my lasers so it's still just coal. I think I ruined the day for mothers. All I did was make her cry even more. I promised not to go above anymore. Last night she told me a story about my other mommy and her friends… I wish they were here too.
September 11 6AS,
Mommy says I'm her ray of sunshine and her light. I feel warm when she tells me that. I asked her why and she said it's because I'm always smiling and hungry and silly. So I'll always be those things since those things make me into sunshine.
January 10 7AS,
My mommy made me a shield for the bad air! I still can't go out without her, but sometimes we go on raids together. The air still stings when I inhale, but I don't get as sick. Today she taught me how to use my freeze breath… hers is much colder. My training is getting harder and I get hurt a lot, but she always makes it better. One day I hope to be as strong as her. Then I'll protect her like she protects me.
I also found a vid on our last raid. It's a news vid and Supergirl is in it! She has the same powers as me and mother. She looks so cool in her uniform… mother said she used to wear a cute, little, red skirt… I hope I never see that.
November 12 11AS,
She says I remind her of my other mother, of Supergirl. I'm not sure if that's a good thing. She looks so sad sometimes, when she looks at me. I wish I could make her smile without the sadness. I'm getting stronger and the kryptonite doesn't affect me as much. I lasted five hours in the gas chamber which is a new record. It hurts a lot, but I've got to get stronger… otherwise, I'm no good to mother. Soon I'll be able to go outside and do more than raids. It's my birthday soon… I wonder if mother will remember this time. She works so much, I wish I was more helpful.
November 24 11AS,
She remembered and we spent the day making cake; it was so good! And she shared a new story with me! She told me about the first time she went flying with Supergirl and how they had game nights with all their friends. I learned about Alex, Winn, James, Brainy, Nia, J'onn… so many names. I sometimes wonder what happened to everyone, but I'm too scared to ask. They aren't here now… it's just me and mother.
March 26 14AS,
I had another nightmare; I think they're getting worse. At least mother holds me at night and when I hear her voice, I don't feel so trapped. I'm getting better at making her laugh and smile. She seems happier now that I'm able to withstand the polluted air. I've gone on more missions and only once did I ever get a really bad injury. The bots are carrying kryptonite blades now… they're strong. The scar across my back will probably never disappear entirely. Mother did her best to graft the skin so that it wasn't as noticeable.
Now that I'm stronger, she depends on me more. I hold her when she looks like she's trapped in the past.. She's building something rather large; it takes up most of her time.
May 4 14AS,
The nightmares still come but I've stopped crying. She always looks so tired at night after working on that strange machine. She must also have nightmares because I can feel her tremble in bed and she calls out a name I haven't heard before. Kara. I'm not sure who that is… she's never mentioned a Kara before.
I've taken over meal prep since she forgets to eat all the time. I miss her cooking.
She hasn't sent me on many missions and I'm growing restless, but maybe she needs me down here with her. The topside is getting worse. I found more vids of Supergirl and… I wish she was here. I feel very strong, but… I feel like I can't be anything else. I can't be scared… I can't be sad… I need to be what she needs me to be. Apparently I've become more sarcastic… it's really easy to slip into.
July 5 19AS,
I know my mission now and I'm ready. I'm strong in body and mind and I won't let her down. Everything I am today is because she conditioned me to weather the darkest most painful paths, and I won't let it be for nothing. I just wish I didn't have to leave her all alone. I know I'll see her past self, but it won't be the same… she won't even know who I am. Mother said that she might be a little shut off… so I guess I won't expect the same affection.
I'm going to leave this behind. I do have one final question… if I were to break, would my mother still love me? What if I fail?
I'm scared.
Lena closed the journal and let out a sob before handing Alex the time traveling object. She hadn't read all of the entries, but the entries she had skimmed painted a very dark picture. Arryn had told her she was very good at being what she needed, but she hadn't realized the emotional burden shouldered in that comment. It was clear that Arryn blamed herself for Lena's sorrow… that she still blamed herself.
"I have to find her."
"She's at home, Supergirl just confirmed."
Lena nodded and hastily left. When she entered the loft, she rushed to the spare room. She turned the light on and felt her heart drop when she realized it was empty. She went back to the living room and checked the couch but she wasn't there either. Finally she checked her room and found the girl curled in the blankets and hugging one of her pillows tightly. She glided towards the bed, reached out to wake the girl, but stopped short when she noticed the light sheen of sweat on Arryn's skin.
"No, please…" Arryn whined as she tossed and turned, "I can't…"
Lena gently caressed Arryn's face and tried to shush her nightmares away. Arryn woke with a start and scrambled away from Lena.
"I'm sorry," Arryn rasped out as she wiped the tears that threatened to fall. "I… I couldn't fall asleep, and your blankets and pillows… well they," Arryn's breath hitched.
Lena drew closer to the youth and slowly wrapped her arms around her. "You miss her." Lena whispered as she cradled Arryn.
"I'm ok, I just," Arryn took a deep breath and relaxed her body. "I'm sorry, I'll go back to my room."
"Stop." Lena tightened her grip and pulled the girl closer to her. "Please… stop."
"Are you ok?" Arryn asked, turning her gaze on Lena and checking for any abnormal health conditions. Aside from an elevated heart rate, nothing much seemed to be wrong with her. "I'm fine, I promise… don't worry." She wore a gentle smile as she reassured the woman who was looking at her with wet eyes. "Don't cry… please."
Lena struggled to keep from falling apart. All her life she had learned to restrain her emotions because Lillian had no desire for her affection and cast them as weaknesses. She grew up with a family that saw emotions as elements to manipulate; puppet strings to pull. In time she learned how to wear a mask, to hide her precious emotions away from those who sought to use them against her. The smile Arryn was giving her was a different kind of mask; a smile worn for Lena's comfort. Somehow, her daughter had picked up the same tactics; even if for very different reasons, it filled Lena with a deep sorrow.
"You can't keep it all in… it'll destroy you." Lena whispered as she placed her hand on Arryn's cheek. "It's ok you know… it's ok to cry." Her voice wavered as a lone tear trailed down Arryn's cheek. "It doesn't mean your weak or stupid," Lena continued and more hot tears fell. "I'm sorry for letting you feel so alone… I guess I'm not really mother of the year material."
"But," Arryn whimpered, "you're my favorite." Arryn's whimpers turned into sobs and Lena pulled the girl to cry into her embrace.
Arryn wept and felt all her walls begin to crumble as her mother's arms wrapped around her tighter. She could taste the saltiness of her tears as they slid past her lips and found comfort in the familiar lavender scent that always lingered on her mother. Her cries died down as Lena's soft hushes soothed her as did the way she was combing her hair. She wondered if it was somehow innate… it's what her mother often did after a particularly hard day. Soon enough Lena felt the girl's weight shift and her breathing was slower; she had fallen asleep
She lay there holding the girl from the future and thought back to when she woke up that morning. She had found coffee and toast awaiting her on the counter. Stupidly, she had checked her surveillance cameras, not realizing it was Arryn who had prepared the food. Being a Luthor meant being a target. That was when she saw Kara in her suit sneak up on Arryn and then pine after the toast. When she zoomed in on Arryn, she could clearly see how Kara's presence affected her. She was nervous and unsure but eager to please, so she had let Kara eat the first toast. It was sweet to see how happy Arryn looked when Kara practically shoved the toast down her throat.
When she showed up at the cafe, Lena had been caught off guard. She had invited Kara for lunch to tell her about Arryn… to tell her that she knew a lot more than she let on. Truth be told, she wanted Kara's help… the whole situation felt overwhelming and she thought the kryptonian might handle a super-powered teenager better than she could. Aside from that, Kara was warmer than she was and probably more nurturing. However, it never dawned on Lena that Arryn was oblivious to Supergirl's identity as Kara Danvers. She would have found it more comical, if the girl hadn't looked so hurt towards the end, and Lena understood why. Supergirl was her mother… if Lena chose anyone else, it would mean the end of her existence. It also didn't help that Arryn associated her existence with Lena's loss. She sighed out of frustration; she had thought if ever she had a child, she would protect them from carrying her scars. To top it off, Kara had inadvertently been told she was Arryn's mother, but couldn't so much as say anything as Kara Danvers. All in all, it was a disaster.
Tomorrow she planned on admitting to Kara that she knew about her being Supergirl, and then together they could let Arryn know the truth about her family. Lena smiled-their family.
The next morning, Lena rose early and waited in the kitchen. Sure enough, Supergirl flew in and looked a bit surprised to see Lena instead of Arryn.
"Le...Ms. Luthor, uhhh, you're up super early." Kara stammered as she took in the sight of Lena in a t-shirt and plaid pajama pants with her hair let loose. A more glorious sight, she couldn't imagine. She coughed and looked away, "is Arryn here?"
"Still sleeping." Lena whispered. "I'll be taking her out today. I've taken the day off." Lena smirked and added, "do you mind letting Kara know I'd like her to join us for breakfast at Russo's around 9."
"Oh, yeah sure. I'll be on my way then…" Kara turned to leave and then looked back. "Is she alright? Agent Danvers called and said she might not be."
"She's fine, if but a bit prone to carrying the weight of the world all on her own." Lena sighed, "which is why I want her to sit with Kara for a bit."
"Kara…. what can Kara do?" Kara asked meekly.
"If there's one thing I know about my best friend, it's that she often tries to carry more than she should to protect those she cares about; Arryn needs to hear from someone who can relate. Plus, Arryn owes her an apology."
Kara smiled and blurted out, "you're amazing."
Lena blushed, but kept her eyes on the Kryptonian. "What makes you say that?"
"You're just… good at everything." Kara explained, feeling her blush run down her throat. "Anyhow I should get going. I'll see you… I mean, I'll see that Kara makes it to breakfast."
Lena chuckled and nodded as the Kryptonian made her exit. How Kara managed to keep her identity secret, Lena would never know. When Arryn woke, the teenager beamed with energy and Lena wondered if all Kryptonians woke up like that after a night of crying. If so, she envied that ability.
"Looks like you beat me this time," Arryn yawned as she entered the kitchen and settled with a lazy smile.
"I actually took the day off, I wanted you to join me for breakfast." Lena commented and watched Arryn's face for a reaction.
"That sounds great, I love breakfast! Food in general… also, did Supergirl come by?"
"She did, but I let her know you'd be spending the day with me." Lena answered.
"Oh, good, I'm glad I missed her… I mean sorry, sorry I missed her."
Lena arched a brow at the girl's strange response, but didn't push for an answer. Soon enough they found themself at Russo's which was a small cafe with a private patio that Lena had requested in advance.
Lena ordered her usual coffee and fruit cup, but when she looked over at Arryn, she found the girl in awe over the menu.
"Order whatever you want," Lena insisted.
"Are you sure… because I can eat a lot." Arryn warned.
Lena nodded with a small smile; if she was anything like Kara, her stomach was a black hole. However when she asked for one of everything on the breakfast menu, Lena still wasn't prepared. The waiter looked at her with a tentative look, but she just nodded and sent him on his way. Another waiter came by and he was accompanied by a smiling blonde. Lena quickly rose and hugged Kara before she settled in the seat in between her and Arryn. The teenager's eyes widened before she could control her expression and offer Kara a friendly smile.
"I hope you don't mind, I invited Kara to join us." Lena stated and cast a concerned glance at Arryn.
"Of course I don't mind. I actually wanted to apologize," she looked at Kara, "for yesterday."
"Oh, don't worry about it," Kara waved her hands in front of her.
"I've decided you are a much better partner for my mother… I mean aunt," Arryn went on. "Since our last meeting I have discovered Supergirl is much too erratic… I'm pretty sure she wants both of you. See I had a late night talk with her and she didn't say exactly that, but in so many words, she may as well have."
"Are you sure that's what she meant?" Kara asked, her cheeks practically glowing.
"She asked me if I thought Lena could love both her and you," Arryn commented and then frowned. "I'd prefer Lena not to end up with some free loving Kryptonian who is willing to share." Then she looked to Kara and smiled, "I'm team Kara now."
Lena opened her mouth but hastily shut it as words failed to come to mind.
"Why the sudden shift?" Kara asked much to Lena's surprise. "How can I compare to a superhero?"
"Because you make her smile, and since you're just a human you won't do that thing all superheroes end up doing." Arryn's voice wavered slightly and Lena saw the quick flash of pain in her eyes that she so easily covered with a gentle smile.
"Which is?" Kara pressed for answers.
"You won't abandon her and sacrifice yourself for the greater good." Arryn commented dryly as she leaned back in her chair and looked up at the sky. "Lena deserves more than…superheroes or super...anything" Arryn looked back down at her hands. She would cease to exist if she kept pushing this along, but maybe that was for the best. "Now if you two don't mind, I'm going to go find Supergirl and have some words with her." She rose to leave but Lena quickly stood in her way.
"Wait, you've got a few things wrong."
Arryn chuckled, "it's ok, I'm ok with this decision. Please, let me go." Lena didn't budge. "You know I could just fly away." Arryn sighed as she prepared to do just that.
"Arryn Zor-el Luthor, do not fly away from your mother!" Kara shouted as she stood from her chair.
Arryn felt her heart skip a beat as the cardigan wearing human called out her full name. Slowly she turned to look at Kara and stood still as her blue eyes focused on her.
"Did you just…" Arryn pinched her cheek and tilted her head. "Am I dreaming? Did I die?"
"No… I know your name because… I'm Supergirl."
Arryn heard the words and even managed to piece them together; Kara Danvers had just claimed she was Supergirl.
"Kara Cardigan Danvers…" Arryn burst out laughing, doubling over as she reached out for the chair to keep her from falling to her knees.
Lena sighed and massaged her temples before walking over to a flabbergasted Kara.
"I don't think she believes you." Lena murmured, giving Kara a sympathetic smile.
"I'm not sure you do either," Kara eyed the brunette warily.
"Believe me, I do…" Lena sighed, "I've known for awhile."
"What? How?" Kara's eyes widened.
"At first I thought you were blatantly trying to out yourself to me, but I soon realized you're just a really bad liar." Lena teased. "Ms. I flew on a bus and can sneeze hard enough to take out a SWAT team. It's also probably your fault that our daughter has such horrible skills of deduction."
Kara blushed when Lena said 'our daughter' and noticed the smirk that graced her lips. "We can't all be geniuses… still does she have to laugh that much?"
Arryn completely missed their conversation as her laughter progressed further until her eyes teared. If she wasn't dead, she soon would be from lack of breath. She eased her shaking body back into the chair and willed her laughter away. She composed herself and looked back up at Kara, who shifted her glasses further up the bridge of her nose, and Arryn struggled to contain her giggles.
"I'm sorry," Arryn coughed out the last of her giggles, "but you can't expect me to believe..."
"I chose her and you're still here." Lena suggested, hoping her daughter would understand.
"You say that now, but obviously later on down the line you're probably swayed by Supergirl's little skirt, or her strong arms, or…"
Lena rolled her eyes and with the agility of a cat, wound one hand behind Kara's neck and slightly lifted herself to meet Kara's lips with her own. The kiss was soft, gentle and warm as Kara leaned further into it. She meant to be chaste, but the feeling was overwhelming and she deepened the kiss. Arryn watched with wide eyes at her mother's brazen behavior but then her jaw dropped when she realized they were floating.
"Rao she floats!" Arryn gasped and that was enough to break Lena from the spell she was under.
"Kara!" Lena shouted and wrapped both her arms around Kara's shoulders. "Put us down."
Kara complied and apologized as she set them down. Arryn stared at them both, completely at a loss of what to say. The waiter came through with trays of food, so they all took their seats, trying to seem as normal as possible. Arryn remained silent and glanced between the two women every now and then. She scrunched her brow and let out a deep breath as she crossed her arms.
"I don't understand…" Arryn looked up at Kara, "you… pretend to be human just to hang out with mom?"
Kara's eyes widened as a blush crept up her cheeks and stammered, "n,n,no that's not why! All heroes have secret identities… it allows me to protect those I love and also… to live a fuller life." She glanced at Lena with a bashful smile. "Apparently it's not too good of a secret."
Arryn cupped her chin and glanced at Lena, "you knew?"
Lena nodded. "Glasses and cardigans can't hide all of Kara's tells."
Arryn chuckled and felt a thrill rush in her chest as her laughter rumbled. It filled her with a warmth she hadn't felt in so long. Then slowly her laughter turned into soft sobs.
"Arryn?" Kara grabbed the girls hand. "What's wrong?"
"I'm just… so happy," Arryn cried, "you're her happiness; you've always been, but I-"
A sick, slicing sound interrupted Arryn's speech and before she could process the searing pain that centered in her abdomen, her mouth was full of a metallic taste. Lena's eyes went wide as her skin paled; a vortex had opened behind Arryn and a strange gas-masked figure stood in its wake. Arryn glanced down and was met with a familiar, glowing green.
"Kryp...tonite?" She could feel her insides burn.
"No!" Kara flew forward, pushing the figure and herself through the vortex.
The vortex closed, leaving behind only the impaled spear in Arryn's back. Lena hardly had time to process what had just happened, when she grabbed Arryn's shoulders with shaky hands. She withdrew one quickly to reach for her phone and called Alex.
"Alex, I'm at Russo's. You need to come now! Arryn's been impaled with Kryptonite… and Kara...she…" Lena cried as Alex responded, but she couldn't make sense of anything.
'Don't…" Arryn's voice was weak as she raised a hand to cup Lena's face. "Cry." She glanced down and then back up at Lena. "Pull… please."
Lena's lips trembled as she observed the spear. If she pulled it out now, Arryn could bleed to death.
"I...I can't, what if…"
"Trust...me… please." Arryn begged.
Lena took a deep breath and took hold of the staff. She felt her throat clench with bile, but steeled herself for what came next. Swiftly she pulled the spear back and threw it as far away as she could. Arryn gasped as she leaned back on the chair and basked in the rays of the sun. The iciness that filled her veins slowly dissipated as warmth washed over her. She could still feel blood bubble in her throat and turned her head so that it spilled on the brick pavement.
"Much better…" Arryn winced and clutched at her side.
"You're still bleeding." Lena cried as she bent down to observe the girl's wound.
"I can't heal all the way… but the important parts are ok." Arryn offered a weak grin. "I just need to rest."
The girl's eyes rolled back and her body went limp. Not long after Alex appeared with a number of DEO agents and they were rushed to the facilities. Alex went to work quickly after Arryn was laid on the operating table. She cut through her shirt and analyzed the wound while cleaning the area. It was a deep gash, but just by being under the sun lamp, Alex could see that the flesh was healing abnormally quick. She had lost a lot of blood; Alex would need to wash her to assess all the damage.
Lena lingered on the opposite side of the table, handing Alex whatever she asked for. She handed her a damp, warm towel and was amazed to see that when Alex wiped the blood from the wound area, all that remained was a scar.
"She's healed… abnormally fast." Alex murmured. "Her heartbeats at a steady rate… I guess I should clean the rest of her up."
However, once she was done cleaning the blood, Lena gasped with horror.
"My god…" Lena's fingers trembled as they lightly traced Arryn's abdomen. "There are so many."
I've been conditioned to adapt to certain levels.
Alex recalled what Arryn had told her and bit back a cry. Only Kryptonite could permanently scar a Kryptonian. The duo continued to wipe Arryn's body of blood and found deeper marks on the girl's back.
"She needs a shirt," Lena murmured as she dabbed at the girl's face.
"Of course, I'll go get one. I also need to check with Brainy on Kara's situation… you said she went through a vortex?"
"Yes… she pushed the man through it. I think… she went to Arryn's time."
Alex clenched her jaw; she had hoped that wasn't the case. Arryn had told her that the air in her time had been tainted with Kryptonite. She glanced back at the girl who was steadily breathing. She wasn't a time traveling expert, but through normal deduction, as long as Arryn was still alive and here, that meant Kara had survived.
"Lena… I know you want to stay by her side, but the agents recovered the kryptonite. I wanted you to take a look at it."
"Of course," Lena nodded, faltered for a moment and then bent down to leave a kiss on Arryn's forehead. "Lower lab?"
"Yeah, I'll drop by after putting a shirt on her."
The two parted ways, each on their own mission and with heavy hearts. Lena couldn't believe how scarred Arryn's body was, and deep in her gut, she had a feeling it wasn't due to battles with enemies. The thought made her stomach turn, but she needed to stay focused for the task at hand. Meanwhile, Alex was determined to find her sister. Somewhere out there, in a different pocket of time, was a displaced Kryptonian in a world she no longer recognized.