A/N: (EDIT) Just a heads up, there was an AUTHOR'S NOTE chapter before this. I've since taken that down and incorporated it into this. Chapter Three did not vanish. This is chapter three, in a sense. Grey and I are hard at work on the next chapter of "A King's Whim" and you can expect an update for "Deck of Heroes" soon as well.

Alas, it also seems I've pissed a few people off so there was the need for this. Some even accused me of "sucking Gilgamesh's dick" as it were.

My friends, this simply isn't the case.

But in lieu of an argument,I feel the need to clarify things. I'm sorry some you seem to feel that way, but you misunderstand. Gilgamesh truly considers himself superior to the world at large. That portion of the story was told from his perspective. YES, there are a number of people who could give him a hard time and QUITE A FEW who could outright kill him if he hurt them or if they set their minds to it. Does he know this? He does not, and thus assumes himself to be the greatest.

But freaking Mizuki?

That maggot is fodder compared to him.

Yes, I know Naruto would kick the shit out of Gilgamesh if he were in his prime.

Unfortunately, he's just a kid at this point.

Nowhere near his peak.

Once he reaches that peak...oh boy.

In the same vein, some Servants are stronger than Shinobi-Heracles for example-and others are weaker such as Angra Mainyu.

Furthermore, Naruto bowed against his will. That was Gilgamesh's "Charisma" skill in effect there. He was also TERRIFIED by seeing someone killed in front of him for the first time in his life. And let's face it, if he hadn't knelt, Gil' would've turned him to paste and we wouldn't have our story.

He's that kind of a guy.

Don't expect Naruto to bow again.

Because he bloody well knows that to expect now.

And he certainly won't be swayed by charisma once more.

I apologize for the inconvenience and wish you all a good night.

ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!

Nine thousand words that is~!

Sorry, that bad just joke had to be said.

HAPPY TEN YEAR ANNIVERSARY TO MEEEEE!

That's right, I've been on this site for ten years now! Wow, I feel old...

I'll say this from the get go, I had to cut this chapter into two parts, because its literally THAT long.

EDIT: I also realized Gilgamesh basically didn't tell Naruto that Mizuki intended to betray him.

I've since addressed that and added it to his dialogue back in the first chapter.

Author's Note: Clarification!

AND ANOTHER WARNING!

When we finally see the Teams, you're going to be surprised. I'm switching them up. Drastically. In part because I have no desire to copy my co-author, but also because I want to change things up for once. The old Team Seven, that is Naruto, Sasuke and Sakura have been done to death. So, new team for Naruto, and a new sensei!

Assuming he makes it out of this chapter in one piece, of course.

So here we are back again!

I'm sure you have questions.

Basically, 'ol Greyblueflames98 and I have an agreement that we we'll try not to use one another's Servants too often. For example, Semiramis ends up playing a VERY prominent role in Naruto's formative years as will Ishtar-much to Gilgamesh's consternation-and Ereshkigal, but not so in his. Likewise I'll try not to use Jack the Ripper often, since he's laid claim to her. He has his own list, and likewise I have mine. Ascensions are also going to be a thing here. In that regard, I intend to use the (Include) and (Install) aspects for Naruto regarding some servants.

But only certain ones, due to the restrictions imposed upon the Deck itself. For example don't expect him to pull a Solomon Install. Waaaaaaaaaay too Op.

A better example would be Gilgamesh.

In Grey's story he's somewhat allied with Naruto.

I do believe he's even going to train him at some point.

No such luck here.

While my Gilgamesh might assist the cast from behind the scenes at times-and openly start trouble at others!-he certainly isn't here to help Naruto. I'd call him more a neutral character who craves entertainment. An entity that despises boredom above all else. A man who will try to eliminate anyone who irks him. He isn't the villain. He certainly isn't a good guy, either. He's allied with no one. He's simply the King. Think of him as a height for Naruto to aspire towards. Whether he ever reaches such a height remains to be seen. He's also a right arrogant bugger who thinks no one can ever compared to him...

Sounds complicated, doesn't it?

Don't worry, it isn't!

Here we go and we're hitting the ground running!

I did warn you all that there would be consequences for Naruto losing the scroll to Gilgamesh.

Far reaching consequences that shake the very world itself.

In this moment, everything changes forever.

In this moment, a boy's dream dies.

And it manifests in this chapter...

...in an unexpected way!

"In time you will know what its like to lose.

To feel so desperately that you're in the right, yet to fail all the same.

Dread it.

Run from it.

Destiny still arrives."

~Thanos.

Stacking the Deck

Naruto wanted to cry.

Scratch that, he wanted to die.

Whichever of the two came first, really.

Although given his abysmal luck thus far as well as the complete and utter lack of sanity of all parties involved, it was probably going to be the latter. In all honesty it was something of a miracle that he hadn't been found and dragged before the Old Man already. In a single stroke he'd gone from pariah to traitor in the eyes of the village. Everything that could've possibly gone wrong had. He'd stolen the Scroll of Sealing, bungled said scroll when faced with a mysterious man in gold, then said man had stolen the scroll out from under him. He'd also accidentally gotten Mizuki killed, which someone was almost certainly going to blame him for. Never mind that the man intended to sell him out in the end, which made him the least concern in the blond's mind. As far as he was concerned the latter had received his comeuppance.

And what did he have to show for all this beyond a splitting migraine?

A deck of cards that he had no idea how to use.

A beautiful woman who called him Master.

And a chorus of voices in his head.

How was that a fair trade?!

Speaking of voices!

"Geez, Master." a rough male cry echoed in the back of his mind as he trudged up the beaten path leading to his apartment, "You actually have worse luck than me. That's saying something. Didn't think ya'd run into the King of Heroes right off the bat! He's a pain the ass to fight."

"Gahaha!" girlish laughter greeted his words. "It cannot be helped! Strong opponents bring out the best in us!"

"Indeed." a woman's cultured sigh echoed the first's sentiment. "Gilgamesh is not someone to be trifled with unless the odds are overwhelmingly in your favor. You're lucky to be alive, boy. I suggest you prepare before you encounter him again. Miss Demon Archer aside, I doubt that DOG will be able to help you when the time comes."

Naruto blinked.

Gilgamesh?

King of Heroes?

Goldie was that important?

Ignorant of their Master's sudden realization, the aforementioned Lancer took offense to that remark.

"Ha? I wasn't asking for yer opinion, poisoner. The kid doesn't need a hag like you."

"How uncouth, Lancer. One should be polite to a lady."

"Umu! I agree! Disrespect isn't beautiful at all!"

"Oh, that's rich coming from a pair of-

'Oi!'

Naruto ruthlessly tuned out the impending argument before anyone else could jump in and split his head open at the seams. Something in him knew better than to stop them. Still, he'd gained a kernel of truth. Gilgamesh. At last he had a name for the man who'd become the bane of his existence. Now he knew who to curse! Get stronger, he said? Don't bore him, he said? What kind of bullshit was that?! He might've spared him the trouble of Mizuki, but he'd more than made his own. Whatever ability Gilgamesh held...it would be difficult to face, let alone counter. Just what kind of technique summoned those swords?

And why did he get the feeling they were only the tip of the iceberg?

A beat of silence followed as the exhausted blond scaled the last of the rusted staircase and reached the battered door that signified his humble abode. Ah, door. He really needed to set aside some time to repair the poor thing; it had seen better days. Fishing out a key from his tattered pocket, Naruto quickly inserted it into the lock and wrenched it open. He'd almost expected to find an armed Anbu detail waiting for him within. Even now he tensed; waiting for shadows to emerge from the dark and lay hands on him. To drag him before the Hokage. Nothing came of his fears. Well. Seemed he still had some luck after all. That...actually befuddled him a bit. The geezer might try to pretend otherwise in his old age, but he wasn't a slouch. He knew how to command his men and he knew that he had nowhere else to go.

Honestly, he was amazed he hadn't been apprehended yet.

He might be good, but he wasn't that good.

So what the hell was he missing?

The shadows held no answers for him.

"I'm home." he muttered halfheartedly.

No one answered of course.

"Damn, this is where you live?" a boy's voice overshadowed the silence in his head. "What a dump...

Risking a step over the threshold, Naruto restrained a small shudder.

Halfheartedly he plucked the Deck from his pocket and shoved it in a drawer.

It did little to relieve his burden.

Furtive eyes darted anxiously about, tensed for an ambush at any moment. For the depth of his deeds were finally catching up to him and panic had begun to set in. Once the four walls of his home had been a source of comfort for him. Now? It felt suffocating. Like the walls were closing in. For a moment Naruto wondered if he should cut and run. He could, couldn't he? Just drop everything and put the village behind him. After all, what did he owe them? His career as a shinobi might as well be over after this.

Reluctantly, he dismissed the notion.

Where would he go, anyway?

Where could he go?

No.

For better or worse, he was trapped.

Apparently the two Servants had continued their bickering while he was having his existential crisis; for a deep growl resonated in agreement to someone's declaration.

This one proved impossible to ignore.

...GRARGH!"

"Well said, Heracles! You're not so bad after all!"

Even Naruto knew that name.

Blue eyes bulged.

'Who-?!'

A sudden bout of dizziness seized him and he pitched forward.

'Oh.' he realized belatedly. 'I didn't think I used up that much chakra...

In truth, he hadn't; it was merely mental exhaustion; he'd pushed himself too far, too fast.

"Ah, shit!" Lancer swore. "Kid's down!"

Naruto would have collapsed right then and there, were it not for Rider's vigilance. Even as he fumbled and lost his footing a gentle hand was there to pick him up. Strong, supple fingers gripped his shoulder and tethered him in place before pivoting, swinging his battered body around onto the bed. Narrowly catching himself against the bedframe in time, the weary teen risked a glance back at her and fought the urge to sputter. Aha. He'd nearly forgotten about her altogether. The Servant in question had thus far followed him at arms length until this very moment, never once speaking. Never questioning him. They barely spoken so much as two sentences to one another since her summoning, yet here she was.

Now, for the first time since they'd met he gave her his undivided attention.

"Why?"

"You are my Master." again, her reply lacked any hint of emotion. "Your well-being is my responsibility."

Naruto shifted restlessly on the bed.

"You keep using that word. I don't think you know what it means."

Her head tilted, though in confusion or anger, he knew not.

"You summoned me, did you not?"

"Yes, well, that was a result of-

"Then you are my Master."

The sudden steel in her words made Naruto blink, but only for a moment.

A bitter laugh escaped him despite his best efforts.

That's it. I give up.

This situation was entirely absurd!

In the last hour, his mind had suffered in such a way that he now felt empty inside. Hollowed. His once youthful naivete had been stripped out of him and stomped on. His dreams, crushed. First by Mizuki, then Gilgamesh. With the former's death he'd desperately attempted to recover, only for the arrogant King of Heroes to crush his hope altogether. Together they'd thrown his life onto a different path, one he couldn't seem to escape. And now he had to entertain a gorgeous woman who seemed convinced that he was her Master. Plainly put, he just didn't have it in him to smile.

"Right. Some "Master" I am." he glowered at the floor. "I'm going to be dead or imprisoned by tomorrow."

"What the hell, Master?!" a troublesome Saber's voice drawled. "Don't tell me you're givin' up just like that?! What happened to all that spirit?!"

"Quiet, you fool girl." someone snarled. "What do you know of betrayal? Leave the boy be."

"Shut up, ya damn witch!"

"Why?"

Now it was Rider's turn to inquire.

"Simply put?" the boy palmed his face to hide his shame, "Because I'm an idiot and I got outplayed. I learned my lesson too late. Rider, right? I'm not the sharpest tool in the shed, ya know. I don't like to give up, but I don't see a way out of this, and ya know...

A spark of anger briefly blazed his eyes red.

Sharpened teeth sank into his hand.

...Damnit, this sucks!"

The bed creaked in quiet protest as Rider's weight settled beside him. A faint rustle of leather informed him of her movement, but in his despair he didn't register. Until her hand settled on his knee and gave him a gentle squeeze. For such a stoic Servant an action like this was utterly unheard of. Naruto didn't know how he knew such a thing, the knowledge was simply there. As though he'd read her history at a glance and recalled some random tidbit. Nevertheless, some small part of him felt honored by this sudden and unexpected show of affection.

"Nevertheless, you are still my Master." she stated, withdrawing her hand. "I will carry out any orders you give me."

...well, that makes me feel a bit better."

Rider's blindfolded gaze couldn't possibly have seen his expression-yet she heard the despair in his voice, twisted her body aside, and offered him a faint smile all the same. Her position seemed a strange one, though her visage remained firmly fixed in his direction she still kept the door well within her "vision". From the moment he'd explained the situation, she'd gone tense. As though she were trying to divide her attention between him and the sole entrance into the apartment at the same time. Even now, he felt she would fly at whomever came through that door and cut them to pieces. Such was her vigil.

Watching it.

Shadowing him.

No, more than that.

Medusa was protecting him.

Without a single order on his part.

What.

He nearly recoiled at the unexpected knowledge.

How in the hell did he know her true name was Medusa?

This was too much.

When he groped for answers, his mind nearly burned itself out. As if someone had shoved an encyclopedia of unknown knowledge in his head, so too did his brain feel full to bursting. Like his skull would split open at any moment. There too many voices in his head. Even then he was aware of others silent entities gauging him; monitoring his every reaction. He stood at a turning point; a precipice in his life. He could step back and lose his mind to madness. Or he could take the plunge and see what lay on the other side. What had he stumbled into?

Oddly enough, a small part of him found his plight funny.

It was almost enough to make the boy laugh.

Maybe he should laugh.

To snicker and cackle, laugh his head off. To laugh and laugh and laugh until everything broke and his sanity fell away. There was a release in madness, an escape. All he had to do was let go. Once he did, he'd never have to care again. Yet something stopped Naruto. A thorn of pride pricked his heart and held him back. He experienced an epiphany then; the sudden realization that were he to let go, to simply allow the horrible events of this night to break him, he'd forfeit a precious commodity. Something valuable. Something he could never recover. A thousand emotions raged back and forth like countless serpents, each one writhing into an ugly knot in his chest. Anger. Sorrow. Disgust. Pity. Confusion. Others he couldn't even begin to quantify.

In the end, his pride held out.

With each passing moment he felt his psyche harden against his fate, stubbornness rearing its head in spite for what he'd endured.

He wouldn't let this despair beat him.

Rather, he refused to let it win.

He absolutely refused.

After all this, the idea of just laying down and accepting his fate left a bad taste in his mouth. What was there left to do but fight? As futile as it might seem, this was all he had.

"...Is something wrong, Master?"

Naruto's face flushed ever so slightly.

"No," he shook his head, "I've just made my decision."

"Well said!"

A golden haze escaped from the Deck in the drawer with a triumphant cry, manifesting itself in a shroud of flowing particles on the floor. Within seconds, the flowing radiance assumed a distinct humanoid likeness. Naruto stiffened at the sight, recalling Gilgamesh had departed in just such a manner. Had that golden king come to torment him once more?! In the end, his fears proved themselves misled; Gilgamesh didn't wear black and he certainly wasn't a woman. Indeed, the newcomer's arrogance alone stood on a plateau of its own and her features could only be described as elven.

If Medusa embodied mystery and subtle charm, this woman stood as a peerless queen.

Rather fitting, given the nature of her identity.

Golden eyes bored into him, framed by hair so dark it resembled ebony. It fell in a wave behind her back, a midnight curtain so long as to trail on the floor behind her. A ruffle of dark feather sheltered her long, pale neck from view. Her bountiful body lay encased in a shoulder-baring gold/black dress, the latter of which served as a corset to bare most of her breasts up for all to see. She cared not a wit for what others thought of her. And why should she? The strong cared not for the opinions of the weak. This was the sensation Naruto received from the newcomer. As he looked on, she flicked a manicured hand through her stygian hair and fixed him with an expectant look, daring him to question the spikes jutting from her hands, or the ribbon trailing between them.

Her name revealed itself to him a moment later.

"Servant, Assassin." she spoke in a voice like poisoned honey, its sweet dulcet tones low and crooning like a nightingale's song. "You may address me as Semiramis, if it pleases you. I've been waiting to hear you stand up for yourself all night, Master." the woman preened, taking quiet pleasure in his discomfort. "If you hadn't shown some backbone I would've killed you and Rider on the spot."

Beside him, Medusa bristled.

"Is that a threat?"

"No, not at all." There could be no denying the subtle satisfaction in her tone. "Merely a promise. Now, then...

Before Rider could think to countermand such a statement, the Poisoner turned her ardent gaze back to Naruto. The blond marshaled his courage to meet her gaze, but found no animosity there. Quite the opposite. One might even call her gaze affectionate. Yet she didn't yield to him all the same. Naruto suspected there were some things this woman would never relent on. If she expected him to back down, she'd was going to be sorely disappointed. Ah. An epiphany dawned on him as he gazed up at the Assassin. So that was what he had lost.

He'd ceased fearing death.

"What are your intentions, Master?"

Despite his best efforts, Naruto felt his right eye twitch.

"Well, not dying would be a start. I'm not a fan of prison, either."

"That's all well and good, but you haven't answered my question." the ancient beauty hummed. "Perhaps I should rephrase that; how do you intend to use me?"

Naruto had no way of knowing, but his very life hung on the answer.

In hindsight, the answer seemed obvious to him.

At the time, he didn't think twice about it.

He answered her with utmost honesty.

Maybe he should've lied.

More fool he!

"I need your help. Isn't that obvious?"

Semiramis stiffened at his sincere response; her taut back arching in genuine surprise as her golden eyes widened. Abruptly, they narrowed on him again. As though she were only truly seeing him for the very first time. A faint chuckle spilled from her mouth, concealed behind a dainty-looking hand. Naruto was under no such delusion there; that hand could snap his neck with a flick of her wrist if she so desired. Even Rider might not be able to stop her in time. Yet Naruto felt no fear. A few hours ago he would've been blubbering on the floor, begging for mercy. Now? Nothing. Just a vague confusion, coupled with impatience.

No, it wasn't that he didn't feel fear, but he couldn't.

His mind had grown numb to it, rejecting the absurdity of the situation so violently that it ceased to recognize the concept of it anymore. He didn't want to die of course-indeed, he'd flirted with death more tonight than he had in his fifteen years of life-dying would mean the end of life and he was fond of life. But as far death itself was concerned, a switch had tripped in him. In a sense, Gilgamesh was as much to blame for this as him. He'd witnessed the majesty of the golden king firsthand, but more than that, he'd encountered a being so far above him that any other threat paled in comparison to his aura.

He no longer cared.

Perhaps she realized it.

"Boy. You're not afraid of me?"

"Why would I be afraid of you?" Naruto frowned.

"Ah."

It was precisely the right thing to say; indeed, Naruto could not have conjured a better response if he'd tried. The poisoner visibly swayed on her feet as though he'd struck her. In a sense, he had. A spiked hand shot out, steadying herself against the nearest wall. This time, her laughter sounded almost genuine by comparison. Her brief bout of weakness lasted for but a moment; then glazed eyes rounded on him. In that instant, that silent sliver of eternity, Naruto experienced...no, not fear...but a flicker of discomfort nonetheless. He had no way of knowing he'd just captured the heart of a rather dangerous creature.

A truly terrible, poisonous monster indeed.

This monster saw more than most.

She could see it now in this orphand; the barest hint of a foundation, faint perhaps, but a foundation nonetheless. His encounter with the King of Heroes had fundamentally broken him. Yet despite that, he was still whole. She could see it. The ungodly amount of energy lent to him by that beast. His unflinching gaze. That boundless determination threatening to drag down the very gods themselves. The shadow of what he would become, a being beyond compare. Given time, one might build upon these meager foundations. With the proper tools and enough patience he could become more than he was now. So much more. Yes, she could work with this. He hadn't made her heart flutter at all back there. No. Not at all. She was being entirely honest with herself!

This boy-her Master!-would do great things.

"Ara, you're just like him." Semiramis mused, thumbing her chin. "I don't know why I'm surprised. I need to watch out for that silver tongue of yours. And?" she drilled him. "What are you going to do about your situation, boy? Do you intend to fight?"

To her disbelief, a jaw-popping yawn answered.

Wordlessly, Rider rose from the bed and allowed him to pull back the tattered blanket.

"Right now?" he sighed, stifling a sudden surge of sarcasm. "I'm tired, so sleep sounds about right. We'll deal with this crap and talk to the old man in the morning." a pause, as he realized something. "Wait. Do either of you need to...?"

...I do not require sleep." Rider reassured him. "I'll assume spiritual form while you rest."

"Nor do I." Semiramis demurred. "In the meantime, I shall familiarize myself with your workshop."

The would-be genin frowned. "Right...I have no idea what a workshop is, but we'll deal with that later, I guess."

"Ho?" an elegant brow arched, though he didn't see it. "We, you say? You're acting like a ruler already. Are you assuming I won't turn on you?"

A spark of defiance snarled in his chest.

"If you were going to kill me, you would've done it by now."

Still...perhaps a bit of caution might be warranted.

Propping himself up, he cast Medusa a look.

"Rider, if she tries to kill me, end her."

Again that faint hint of a smile.

"As you command."

Again, Semiramis's reaction befuddled him.

"My," she purred, "What a broken Master I have. Very well!"

"Wait a minute." Naruto blanched as her shadow fell over him, "What are you-

"Ei!"

To be fair, the Uzumaki expected something the moment he saw the Assassin smile; alas, even then nothing could be done. His human body was infinitely lacking compared to that of a Servant. Yes, he was slow. Far too slow. By the time he realized what Semiramis intended, it was already too late to do anything. Strong hands took hold of his head despite his muffled protest and pulled down hard. A heartbeat later he found his head lain atop a cushion of indescribable softness, as though he'd laid down on a feathery cloud. The tips of her fingers ran firmly yet gently through his hair, caressing his scalp even as the other held his head in an iron vice. When he attempted to move, that hand pressed down, locking him in place.

'Eh?'

He felt a taint touch of amusement from Rider.

Baffled blue eyes swiveled upwards, reeling in confusion.

Instead of an answer, he found only the smug smile of Semiramis.

"As a reward for your bravery, I shall allow you to rest upon my lap tonight." even as he tried to raise his voice in protest, her grip intensified and that same smile deepened. "I suggest you remain still. I wouldn't want to skewer you by accident. Yes," she leaned forward. Her hair tumbled down around him in a dark curtain, tickling his nose. "I promise not to poison you. All you have to do is close your eyes and sleep...

"I don't have any say in this, do I."

That smile turned simply sly.

"You do not, Master."

"Urk."

"Ohohoho?!"

"Wha-that's cheating!"

"Is this the fabled lap pillow?!"

A chorus of laughter-and some dismayed shrieks-from the Deck greeted him.

'All of you, hush!'

Unduly irritated by the chatter, he shouted them into silence. This was not to say he was uncomfortable of course; far from it, he found himself almost pleased by this strange turn of events. You see, Uzumaki Naruto had never experienced the inimitable bliss that was a lap pillow before, not once in his young life. He'd never had someone stroke his head and hum softly to him. From the moment of his birth and his parents' passing he had been denied everything. Though he was indeed nearing adolescence, he was still very much a boy at heart. An event such as this was a rare treat indeed, something to be savored, not spurned.

When faced with such blissful contentment, Naruto couldn't help but yawn.

"Look, just because you put my head on your lap...doesn't...mean...

Much to his chagrin, slumber claimed him quickly.

Unfortunately, dark thoughts haunted him to the last.

For all his bold words, he couldn't see a way out of this one.

He'd never become Hokage now, not with this kind of mark on him. Frankly, he wasn't sure he wanted to anymore. If the rest of the village was anywhere near self serving as Mizuki-as far as he knew-did he really want to prove himself to that lot? To help them? To aid them? To lead him? This was assuming he somehow kept his freedom in the first place, much less his head. The best he could hope for now was imprisonment. Perhaps exile after they sealed his chakra at the least. What else could they possibly do to him now? Kill him? That'd be merciful. Perhaps that was morbid of him. Was it? In the span of a few hours he'd had naivete stripped out of him and stomped on with a spiked boot. Yet in his final moments before he slipped into the dark embrace of the poisoner who held him, a spark flickered.

Yes, a tiny part of him wanted to believe it would all end well.

That he'd find a light waiting at the end of the tunnel.

All this struggle couldn't be for naught, right?

Surely the old man would understand.

None of this was his fault, really.

It couldn't be helped.

(...Meanwhile...)

Yes, it couldn't be helped.

Through his crystal ball Sarutobi Hiruzen solemnly observed the progress of Minato's son. He'd watched in sullen silence as the boy half staggered and shuffled back to his apartment under the ever-watchful gaze of his new companion. He suppressed a shiver at the sight. It wasn't the strange woman accompanying the boy that perturbed Sarutobi so. No, there was a decidedly glazed look lurking in those once lively eyes, as though someone-or something?-had reached inside and scooped out everything that exemplified the boy and hollowed him out from within.

He looked...empty.

The Professor deemed that more than enough and saw little reason to observe any further. He had little doubt Mizuki was at least in part to blame for some of this. He'd caught the tail end of their encounter, and it had proven telling. Whatever scheme the man held in his heart, it had died with him in a storm of swords. Perhaps Inoichi would be able to extract more from the traitors' brain...

...what little remained of it.

In that at least, they might find some justice.

Unfortunately, the same could not be said of Naruto.

The last time a Yamanka had tried to delve into that boy's brain...

...well, the poor sod was still gibbering obscenities in a padded room somewhere.

Regardless of Mizuki's machinations, it didn't change the fact that the jinchuuriki had broken the law when stealing-then subsequently losing-a valuable artifact of Konoha. It would've been one thing if he returned it. That alone would've provided him enough leeway to try and wriggle his way out of severe punishment. Not so now. The aging Kage felt his heart break anew time as he pondered the hell he was about to unleash on his young ward. To do so would be heinous. Horrible. Terrible. He didn't deserve this. Any of it. Indeed, the boy might very well constitute tonight's actions as a betrayal. And he'd be right to do so. If mishandled in any way, shape, or form, it would absolutely shatter Naruto's trust in him, at the very least. At worst it might lead to an explosion of rage that could bring forth the Kyuubi in its entirety. But it had to be done all the same.

To do nothing would incite the village to riot.

The people wouldn't stand for this.

As they saw it, Naruto had all but stolen the Scroll, murdered a loyal-bollocks!-shinobi and handed said scroll over to an enemy shinobi. It didn't matter what he said or what proof he presented; everyone would draw their own conclusions. The truth didn't matter to them; it didn't matter to the Council and it certainly didn't concern someone like Danzo. The latter had been looking for an opportunity to craft the boy into a weapon for years now and he saw this as his chance. If he didn't act, that would be the boy's fate. There was no spin to put on this. It would've been one thing if the boy "borrowed" the Scroll, thereby allowing one of Sarutobi's agents to retrieve it. But this...

...who could predict it?

If there was one silver lining to be gained from tonight's dark cloud of chaos it was this; Hiruzen had learned something. Tried and true tactics did not won the day. Luck had. Blind, bloody luck. Dozens of shinobi were sent out to apprehend a boy that, by rights, wasn't a trained ninja. Capable of occasionally running circles around Anbu perhaps, but untrained nonetheless. No one succeeded. If he hadn't returned of his own volition, Sarutobi might've suspected him of going rogue. In that light, perhaps a change was necessary. Maybe the upcoming team roster should be altered after all...

No, he was already getting ahead of himself.

There were more pressing matters.

Matters he must attend to.

Mizuki's treachery aside...

...as much as he loathed it, the boy would have to be punished, one way or another.

But for now, he was inclined to let him rest. The lad deserved that much at least. In any case the ANBU would retrieve him on the morrow without too much of a fuss. Putting the newcomer aside, he remained confident in them. It wasn't as if Naruto-kun had more allies to call upon. No, that was absurd...

How wrong he was.

(...Within Naruto's Ramshackle Apartment...)

The deck stirred.

Given life by the blond's potent chakra, it had lain in wait.

Observing them.

Watching all.

Until now.

It could be said that the Deck possessed intelligence of a sort; a strict loyalty-one could even call it fealty-to whomever commanded it. Once bound to them it would brook no other Master until their death. The container in which the cards slumbered even contained a portable bounded field of sorts, capable of detecting threats within a mile radius. Decidedly unimpressive given the accomplishments of magi in other worlds and beyond, but its Creator had never intended its shell to do the fighting. No, that task was entrusted to the cards, and the Heroic Spirits within. It was their task to protect the Master from any undue threats.

Threats that were rapidly approaching while their liege lay in slumber.

Unacceptable.

Rider and the Assassin were tasked with defending the interior.

Yet the exterior was left woefully unguarded. Vulnerable.

This could not stand. The Master must be protected.

With a thought, it roused valiant warriors.

Warriors to protect. Attack. Defend.

His safety must be preserved.

Even if it roused Demons.

Or ancient Divinity.

All for his sake.

For him.

For its liege.

For the Master.

(...Just Outside Naruto's Apartment...)

Their orders were simple.

Subdue the boy and his companion while they slept and bring them to Lord Danzo. Preferably unharmed, but if force was required then so be it. No one was to notice them. Any they encountered were to be eliminated or captured as well. It was pivotal that their cell move before the Council-or worse, Sarutobi himself-tried to bring the boy in for questioning. This was an unparalleled opportunity and it mustn't be wasted. On that, the men and women were in complete and utter agreement. Konoha's jinchuuriki had been given free reign for too long. Tonight he'd gone too far. Someone needed to tighten his leash.

They numbered four.

Their strategy, threefold.

Approach in silence, using the shadows the avoid detection. Breach the door with explosive tags. Disorient those within using smoke bombs. Fu would take control of the boy's companion. If the boy resisted, Torune would incapacitate him. Terai and Kanoto were merely present as a formality to complete the squad. They were elite warriors each of them, trained to obey orders without question. Their target wasn't even a ninja; indeed, he'd all but flunked out of the Academy three times now. Resistance was expected to be minimal at best, minor at the worst.

Minimal.

The first man to reach Naruto's door vanished in a hail of what could only vaguely be described as a hail of impossibly fast lead projectiles. Terai didn't so much perish as he did disintegrate; flesh and armor alike reduced to a fine red red mist in the roar of gunfire that followed. Still, his death was not in vain. In the millisecond it took for his ruined body to fall Torune and the rest flung themselves to safety, the latter taking up positions in nearby rooftops. They'd scarcely recovered their bearings before their unseen assailant opened fire again, forcing them to the streets below.

Kanoto was a hair to slow.

The attack caught him in mid-leap.

Or perhaps their opponent was just that agile.

Even as he hurled himself to the ground below the sky opened and death descended upon him. In a last desperate act the ROOT swordsman tried to deflect the agile bullets with his blade. Laughter greeted his efforts and he perished for the attempt; his chakra-coated sword tumbling through bloodied fingers as the storm of lead ravaged his body.

Torune inwardly swore at the sight.

Even then he couldn't find their opponent until they revealed themselves.

"Gahahahaha!" a rich, demanding voice carried down towards them from above, "Carrying your assault out at night, eh? How bold of you lot! Allow me to repay your kindness!"

Silhouetted against the full moon, her body clad in a dark military uniform with a golden crowned cap and thigh-high boots, she embodied the very aspect of war itself. Confidence. Arrogance. Wrath. She was all these things and more. Red. Black. Gold. The colors couldn't even begin to do her justice. Crimson eyes like so many bloody endless battlefields leered down at them, rivaled only by the scarlet cloak draping itself around her shoulders and her flowing ebony hair. She stood tall and proud, katana planted into the roof, hands laid atop its inlaid hilt. In contrast to her rigid demeanor, her smile was one of pure, childish glee.

"Rejoice!" Her accented cry rang out, loud and brimming with derision. "You face The Devil King of the Sixth Heaven! Oda Nobunaga!"

It was a statement of such pride that it couldn't be refuted.

Yet she looked utterly out of place.

Moreso her weaponry.

Torune balked.

To merely call them weapons wouldn't have done them justice. Flintlocks, pistols, every sidearm imaginable and then some. Each hung in the air behind their surly master, levitating as though held aloft by a series of invisible strings. As they looked on the girl banished those that had just discharged themselves, instantaneously replacing them with a flicker of blue light. Countless weapons. Innumerable armaments. A wall of near-limitless firepower capable of tearing through men and women and armies alike. Arquebuses in the dozens, hundreds, thousands. To count them was to count droplets of water in the ocean. Impossible. Somehow, he knew the name of technique all the same-no, it was as if the girl allowed him to know if it.

Three Thousand Worlds.

Leveled downward.

At them.

"Mind Transfer-

"HA! As if such a paltry skill would affect me!"

Fu raised his hands and muttered something incomprehensible; a peal of demented laughter from the girl answered immediately, prompting Torune to realized what he'd just missed. His partner had just attempted to take control of her. He'd failed. Now, the Aburame found himself inclined to agree with the Yamanaka. They hadn't been prepped for this...whatever she was. Two members of their team were gone already. Fu could not control her. He could not get close enough to touch her. Retreat. They had to retreat, they had to get away from this girl, this monster, this demon before-

Perhaps waiting for that very moment, the blackette spoke up.

"Yes, it cannot be helped." the indomitable Archer hummed to herself, crossing both arms before her bosom. "Ordinarily, I would be inclined to be merciful; to let you lot crawl back to your master and tell him of this night. However!" A towering sneer warped her pale features, transforming that once benign visage into an expression of pure murder. "You peons tried to take my Master away from me. Before I could meet him! You dare inflict such indignity upon me after I'd finally awoken?!"

Wide scarlet eyes blazed as though lit from within.

Gleaming with unholy light, they narrowed.

"That is an unforgivable sin!"

As one, the rifles pivoted, their hammers cocking back with a resounding click.

A strange, fleeting phrase flickered through Torune in his final moments.

You cannot reason with a tiger when your head is in its mouth.

Yes, this saying certainly applied to the Servant above.

His head vanished in a red spray moments later.

Fu survived the barrage through sheer instinct alone; though he didn't truly recognize the weapons hanging above their heads, he appreciated their power and understood the danger. Thus he wasn't caught unawares like the rest. A quick substitutions spared him the fate of his comrade, replacing his body with a moldering trash can from a nearby alley. Even as the racket of a thousand bullets striking metal rang out he was already moving with all the speed he possessed, flinging himself down an alleyway to avoid her prodigious rate of fire. That fool girl couldn't hit what she couldn't see. Thankfully she remained focused on her present barrage. How had she not roused the entire village with that ruckus?!

"Why are you running?!" a demented cackle rang overhead. "Surely you don't intend to flee?!"

Escape? Foolish. In Fu's mind retreat was not an option. It never had been. That the boy commanded such powerful allies was of a secondary concern now; indeed, one might say it drove the necessity of his mission home for him. His objective remained intact despite the obstacles he'd encountered thus far. One way or another, he resolved to bring him in. He needn't battle that madwoman to snatch the jinchuuriki; she wasn't his objective here. Yes that was the way. He still possessed a few tricks to outmaneuver her. Just needed time.

He would retrieve the boy or die trying, else Danzo-sama would...would...

...why couldn't he feel his legs?

In dismay he risked a glance down, only to find a crimson spear jutting from his chest. It hung there for a long moment, protruding from his heart with silent intent. What? His mind refused to comprehend what it saw, the very sight of the weapon so abnormal that it refused to register in his psyche. Trembling fingers reached for the crimson shaft, only to have it violently withdrawn. Denied its pillar od support, Fu felt his body tumble to the ground in a heap of convulsing limbs. His body was already fading even as the spear left the wound, his mind sustained through sheer will.

As such, the Yamanaka had time enough to see his killer.

A cerulean boot entered his field of vision.

With fading eyes, he looked up.

"Sorry," a rough voice trickled in his ear, "I'm not a fan of backstabbing, but you didn't leave me much choice."

By contrast this one seemed comparatively simple.

Clad entirely in blue with wild azure hair to match, he looked like a wild dog. Red eyes not unlike those of the girl gazed down at him, though these were soft with pity. That crimson spear in his hand was another matter. Resting against an armored shoulder it radiated bloodlust on a primal level, hungering for battle even as it dripped with blood. A twist of the wrist brought its cursed tip to bear. Ah, his failing mind realized. There was no mercy to be seen in those eyes now. So this was how it would end...

Surely the seals on his body would relay some useful information to Danzo-sama.

They simply had to.

They must.

"Hold still now," his killer warned as he readied his weapon, "I'll make it nice and quick. Wouldn't want to wake up the kid, would we? He's got a big day tomorrow."

Everything was swimming now; it took all he had to make the words out.

Even so, the dying Anbu persisted to the very last breath.

If he he could just learning something useful...!

"You monster...just...what are...you...?"

Lancer scoffed in quiet irritation.

"Ha? Isn't that obvious, now?"

A streak of scarlet arced.

"I'm just a loyal dog."

His last sight was that of Gae Bolg slamming into his face.

Blackness.

(...Early the Next Morning...)

Sunlight.

"Ugh, my head...

Perhaps that was what woke him.

Maybe his dreams had something to do with it.

Regardless, the faint light on Naruto's face would not be denied any longer; though he scrunched his eyes shut and struggled in vain to cling to the sweet embrace of slumber, his body simply wouldn't have it. He'd had his sleep and now it was time to rise. Belatedly, Naruto realized he'd somehow managed a full night's sleep despite his nightmares. Semiramis must've deposited him in his bed after he'd dozed off, for he found himself tucked secure and snug beneath the covers. Strange specters had haunted him as he slept. He'd dreamed of spears and swords, rifles and chains alike. Fire and blood. Of poison and the cries of a woman. And there, at the end of it all, a hill of swords. So many jumbled images that he couldn't even begin to make sense of them all but that last one, at least, remained poignantly clear.

Did they have something to do with his new allies?

When he stretched his senses outward he sensed...well, not so much something as the lack of nothing. Bleary blue eyes squinted hazily at the room before him, noting its immaculate state. Odd. He didn't remember trying to clean recently. He certainly hadn't had the time for that before he'd passed out last night. No, not clean he realized. Not entirely. As he looked on, he realized someone had carved a fair number of strangely luminescent runes-and how did he know that word?!-into a number of the walls, their faces overlaid with strange script he didn't understand.

More importantly!

When had he acquired that ability to sense things?! He'd done so instinctively, but the realization startled him all the same.

"Rider?" he croaked out into the empty room.

Silence.

"Semiramis?"

No response came.

Rather, not from the room.

"Ah, Onii-chan don't be so loud...

Not a moment later a pair of slim, tan arms slithered up from beneath the covers and fastened themselves around his waist-and one of his arms-in an inescapable grip. With a firm yank they dragged him back down to the mattress with firm insistence and pinned him there. Something-or someone-shifted under the sheets and crawled onto his chest. Naruto's blood turned to ice in its veins. Not from fear but rather, disbelief. Someone was in his bed. Someone was in his bed. Someone. Was. In. His. Bed! With a massive effort of will he tamped down on his own rising panic. No, no he wasn't going to scream.

No, not a bit.

Not at all.

'Eh?'

A few hours ago he would've started shrieking and thrashing about in his bed like a madman and in doing so created quite the situation. Indeed, the only thing preventing him from kicking up a fuss now was sheer morbid curiosity and his own raw disbelief. Twitching, he turned toward the sound and spied a tuft of snow white hair peeking out beneath the blankets. The weight resting against his chest wasn't unbearable, but bothersome all the same. He wanted to look. Should he look? Did he dare look? What manner of creature awaited him beneath the blankets? Was it human? Would they kill him? No, no, no, putting the matter of humanity aside, he was certain he shouldn't be in this damn situation in the first place!

"Tch, nothing ventured nothing gained!"

The trembling fingers of his free hand twitched.

With an expaserated sigh he reached down and ripped the blankets free.

An annoyed hiss greeted him, akin to the sound of a small kitten.

Odd, it didn't sound like a beast at all-

Urk.

She-for this was most certainly a she!-did indeed have white hair. A young girl who barely looked to be in her teens. Clad in revealing red and boisterous black, her outfit left much to be desired; indeed, one could scarcely call it an outfit at all for all the tanned skin it revealed-oi! She was too young! Too young! Far too young to be wearing something like that! Yet a distant, detached part of his mind pondered upon other matters. Was that a mark on her stomach? What purpose did it serve? And oh she was waking up...?!

"Jeez, you're makin' a racket...

Bleary amber drifted open.

Blinked up at him.

Squinted.

Smiled.

"Oh, you're up, Onii-chan. Good morning! Time for a recharge~!"

Humming softly, she leaned forward.

Chu~!

'Did she just?!'

Naruto's mind leaped out the window.

In hindsight, there was only one response.

He jumped out of bed as if he'd been burned.

"When did I summon a loli, oi?!" Naruto squawked!

Chloe von Einzbern otherwise affectionately known as Kuro, took offense to that.

"I'm not a loli!"

"Then why do you look like one!?"

Unfortunately he failed to take into account the younger girl's tenacity. Or her grip. In his haste to escape he sent them both tumbling to the floor in a tangled mess of shouts and crossed limbs. His sole saving grace was that he managed to wriggle his remaining arm free and trap her beneath him. Even then, the strange girl's petulant smile didn't diminish.

"Why're ya freaking out? It was just a-

"No, no, no!" Naruto frantically shouted over a hand over her response. "We are not speaking of this! Not! Who the hell are you?!"

Her grin was telling.

"Call me Kuro. Nice ta meetcha, Master!"

Thus, the first day of his unexpected new life began.

A/N: Yes, I just did that.

And now Naruto, through the actions of his well-meaning Servants, has blood on his hands. Oh, dear.

He's also got himself an adorable little sister of sorts~!

I say again, Sarutobi Hiruzen is a fool.

A good-natured one perhaps, but a fool nonetheless.

Conversely, the same label applies to one Danzo Shimura.

You really shouldn't play with fire when you've got DYNAMITE in your hand.

Don't worry, there won't be bashing; but I won't be singing Konoha's praises either.

Yeah, Naruto's life got a hard reality check and its affected his mind drastically. For better or worse remains to be see, but his mind has...matured, if not hardened from this incident. He's all but given up his dream of being Hokage. Next time, consequences! But are they positive or negative? Hmm...

Don't forget to review! Reviews feed my creative engine!

So in the Immortal Words of Atlas...

...Review...Would You Kindly?

And enjoy these previews!

Yes, there's a lot of them. Why would you complain about that. Mind you, they're rough. As in not concrete yet. They're just possibilities, after all. This story may be a tad serious at times, but it can certainly have its moments of levity. You'll be surprised!

Guess, I dare ye!

(Previews!)

"Why did you possess her, oi?!"

"Simple. Unlike Ishtar, I lacked a host. She was suitable."

"That's besides the point! Let her go!"

Ereshkigal grinned.

Or was it Ino?

"Does this form not please you?" humming, the divine blond gave a small twirl, flaunting her new body in a way the Yamanaka never would. "I'm rather surprised myself. She proved far more compatible than I'd expected. Our union was nearly seamless. To think, I nearly went for that pink banshee. Besides that, we made a contract. She happily accepted the terms, I assure you."

"Do you know what this is, Praetor?"

"Er, no?"

"Its a trap!"

"Wahahahaha! That's right, it cannot be helped! Traps are best when they're sprung!"

"...someone going to stop Nobunaga?"

Medusa gracefully tilted her head.

...Master, your hands."

"I'm a dead man, aren't I?"

"That depends entirely on your response."

In the end, revenge is a dish best served cold.

"Ara, that's a promising scary look you have there. Did you need something?"

...train me."

A thin smile blossomed.

"Louder, Master. I can't hear you."

Blue eyes burned the color of bloody rubies.

"I need you to train me!" his voice cracked on the last word, breaking in its grief. "I need to get stronger! I'm no good to anyone like this! I can't protect anyone, let alone myself! You guys all call me Master, but I can't do anything by myself! I hate it!"

As he looked on, her blank countenance turned positively euphoric.

"Ah~! There it is. That's the face I wanted to see. Do you want to avenge them?"

"Oh fuck this. Berserker! INSTALL!"

Dark eyes bulged.

"What in the-

"You. Fly."

The blade twisted in the wound.

"How does it feel to die in vain, fool?"

A wet, hacking cough answered his words.

He expected weakness in their final moments. Despair. Exhaustion. Groveling at the very least. They always groveled at the end. Be it for mercy, their lives, or their families. He never gave it to them. Why should he? He'd forsaken the path of pity long ago. There could be no room for mercy in this line of work. The weak died and the strong thrived. Anyone who thought otherwise was naive. Just what had this one been thinking, trying to be a hero by stalling him? Impeding his quest for immortality? Nay, it was the very height of folly; one they would pay for with their life!

The laughter, when it came, completely threw him off balance.

A bloodied hand seized his arm, drawing him close.

"Not...in vain...

"What?!"

Blazing eyes glared up at him.

"Sacrifice."

Fire flickered in his peripherals.

Too late, he realized what they intended.

"YOU FILTHY-

A thousand explosions blazed the world white.

R&R~!

=D

~Nz.