"So, any prospects on the horizon?" Jasper asked as he spun his empty beer bottle on the extremely marred table top. The bottle wobbled as it stumbled over names and declarations of love carved long ago. Jasper had too much faith that the bottle would return safely to his hands. I guess he hadn't spilled beer on me in the five years we'd been coming to this dive, so maybe I should give him some credit.

"Oh, you know," I started, pretending to focus on my beer bottle's label. "Nothing but possibility."

Emmett smirked knowingly from across the table.

"What?" I asked.

"Has that 'possibility' kept you from coming out with us the past three weeks?" Emmett asked pointedly.

"I've been… busy," I muttered lamely. I don't know why I lied. We all knew I wasn't saving any face.

"Edward, man, you need to get some balls," Rosalie piped up from her spot beside Emmett. "I mean, you KNOW I love cars, but if I had to listen to last week's tool talk about rebuilding his engine for another minute…"

It's no wonder that I had opted to stay home and clean my keyboard the past few Fridays.

"It's not what you think –" I stopped.

"You've got to tell him, Alice. I swear, he's going to die!" Bella's voice made its way over to our table as she and Alice stumbled out of the bathroom, across the room in a dank corner.

"It's always what I think," Rose quipped and stood up to go to the bar. "Look – I think it's Bella!" she said and shot me a pointed glance as she walked away.

"What?" Bella asked, scrunching her face up and laughing. "I've been here all night!"

"Rose was just worried you had forgotten your name, darlin'," Jasper said. Emmett guffawed. Bella shrugged her shoulders and made quick work of finishing her drink.

"Edward, you won't believe what the bathroom wall said…" Alice began, making a weird circle in the air with her pointer finger. "HINT!" she whispered conspiratorially. "It's about you!"

"Hot damn! Was it ever about you," Bella whooped.

"I don't subscribe to bathroom gossip," I told them as I raised my glass to the bartender to let him know I was ready for our next round.

"Even if it's… true?" Bella raised her eyebrows expectantly.

"I can't wait: Whoever wrote on the wall said that your dick is the next messiah, Edward. THE NEXT MESSIAH!" Alice cackled.

"Are you sure that didn't say 'EMMETT' and not Edward, Alice?" Emmett had a preternatural need to be the center of attention.

"PLEASE don't EVER bring your name up in a conversation about penises, Emmett! You're my BROTHER," Alice said with disgust.

"DO YOU FORGET WHAT I SAW LAST MONTH?" Emmett yelled as he put his hands over his eyes, as if covering them would exorcise from his mind the memory of finding Alice and Jasper going at it on the kitchen counter.

"How do you know it's true, Bella?" Jasper asked with a smile.

"Oh, I have my ways…"

The air was colder and sharper than I expected for mid-April. I rubbed my hands up and down the side of my arms as I quickly jogged toward my apartment.

When we all met five years ago, I never imagined that we would become the best of friends. I did, however, know right from the start that I would love Bella.

I didn't know that I was going to be her doormat. Many guys would probably jump at the chance of regular sex without being in a relationship, but I wasn't one of them. Not with Bella, anyway. I loved her. I knew it. She knew it. I gave in every week because I needed a part of her. But every week it felt like I was sacrificing part of myself.

It had to end, I decided.

"Wait up, Edward!" I stopped when I heard the voice behind me. It was Bella. Of course it was.

"You forgot your phone."

"Thanks."

"You have a text message from Brittney," she said as she handed it over. "Not that I was looking, but the vibration is the only reason I noticed it. She wants to know what you're up to."

"So you did look?" I didn't care. But I wanted her to admit that she did.

"Well, it was flashing on the screen when I picked it up. So, what are you up to?"

"Trying to walk off that last pitcher," I admitted. "Just going home."

"Anyway," I started walking again.

"Are we OK?"

I turned and studied her face.

Her cheeks were slightly flushed. Her hair was all over the place. Bella had a habit of messing with her hair while she was drinking. She was so god damn beautiful.

"Always," I said with a nod. "Want me to walk you home?"

"I have a thing, um… I'm meeting Kevin."

"Well, I hope he moves on to subjects more stimulating than his engine tonight."

"Ugh, don't remind me. What a bore. Talk to you later, OK?" She raised her hand to cup my face as she always did. It normally didn't bother me, but tonight it just felt wrong. As did her promise to talk to me later, which we both knew meant another 2 a.m. call from my front door.

"You know what?" I said, changing my mind. "I'm actually going to call Brittney and head over there, so I'll talk to you later this weekend."

"Oh…. You are? I mean… OK. Well, have fun. Or don't. Or," she grimaced.

"Yeah, I'm just going to go. Bye, Edward."

I caught a taxi and texted Brittney. I was going to get over Bella.