Chapter 2: What Have I done?
Cara stood there watching as Stephen just teleported out, she knew instinctively that she had crushed his heart and that nothing would be alright between them ever again. Cara knew in every sense that Stephen had feelings for her, maybe even loves her, but while she did share those feelings she also knew she loved John and that he had been there for her in every way since they met. That despite whatever connection Stephen and her shared it was just that a mental telepathic connection and nothing more, till last night. If she was being honest with herself, last night was everything she had ever dreamed and fantasized about with Stephen, it made her tingle still even now feeling their psychic connection grow stronger, deeper, she could feel every part of his mind and knew that there were no feelings of uncertainty or distrust, she knew without a doubt that he was in love with her.
But, what hurts the most is that she could feel his anger and rage and hurt feelings at what she had said to him, she could feel it through their connection as it bleed through into her mind and it made her feel even worse than before. Cara knew that their relationship, their friendship for that matter would always have those damned words hanging over it. If Stephen knew how, he would probably sever their connection, and that was something she desperately wanted to avoid, as much as she loved John, her connection to Stephen felt right to her on every level. As soon as Stephen came to the lair she was going to straighten this mess out and do her best to fix their relationship and show Stephen that she was still there and that despite not having a relationship that they were still friends and nothing had changed. Cara knew that was a lie, but its what needed to happen.
As she teleported into the lair, she walked straight into the "command center" as it was jokingly called and stopped, there standing in front of her was John, but it was different now, there was no rush of excitement when she saw him, no feelings of happiness or love or anything, just cold emotional distance. John had started to speak apologizing over and over and telling her that he thought about her ever day and that this time apart from her made him realize he cant keep secrets from her in their relationship and he loves her and wanted her back. But at the same time Cara was analyzing her feelings and realized something had changed, those feelings for John weren't as strong as she thought, that everything she thought about John while she was in the shower and after she broke Stephen's heart, those feelings just weren't enough, like it was a million years ago and that for the first time she is seeing him as a stranger and it unsettled her.
"...Cara...you hear...me? John was waving his hand in front of her eyes as she blinked back to reality and away from her thoughts, "Yeah sorry I blanked out for a while there, you were saying." Cara replied. Still thinking about her revelation and trying to figure out why she felt that way. "Look Cara, I spent all those days away from here, from you and it made me realize that lovvfff… love you. And I am sorry it took something so drastic for me to tell you and I promise no more secrets," John begged as he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her in for a loving kiss. Cara responded and kissed back even though the kiss felt wrong to her like she was cheating. It was at that exact moment that she felt the startling realization that she wasn't in love with John anymore and it scared her, returning John's kiss once more and then pulling away saying she needed to get some sleep that she had a headache.
John stood there watching and knowing that Cara hadn't forgiven him and that something was off with her. Hearing Russel being his lively self once more he walked out into the main part of the lair catch up with the other Tomorrow People hanging out in the lair.
Meanwhile Cara had retreated to her room and was sitting on her bed wrapped in her blankets in a blanket fort thinking it would protect her while she sorted through her feelings. She started re-examining everything she knew about how she felt for John and all the amazing times they had shared together over the years. She looked at their relationships their ups and downs. Then she looked at Stephen and how she had connected to him, to his thoughts, his feelings and how she knew he felt for her. And what she came up with after hours of thinking was that some how along the way she started thinking about Stephen more and their connection and less about John. All she knew was that last night changed everything and she didn't know how to come to terms with it, how was she supposed to tell John that she wasn't in love with him anymore, that she was falling in love with Stephen and that it didn't feel right to be with him anymore.
At the same time she realized something else and it broke her heart immediately, she told Stephen the exact opposite and she head broken his heart as well. How would he ever forgive her, how would he understand what she is going through right now. Strengthening her resolve she started to try and come up with a plan to talk to John and then Stephen and sort this mess out. Whatever else happened, she was going to fix this mess and figure out a way to make it up to Stephen, even if it took her entire life apologizing to get his love and trust back, she was going to earn it.
As she decided to get dressed and put on a little sluttier and naughtier outfit hoping to knock Stephen's socks off and hopefully entice him enough to not be as angry and give her time to share her feelings is when she felt it, a sharp knife feeling stabbing into her brain, she hadn't even realized she had fallen to the floor or that John was hovering over her asking her what was wrong or what hurts. All she knew was that it was the most debilitating thing ever felt. Her throat was screaming raw and she had no idea why she was feeling this, pain or loss. When she reached out to Stephen, that was when she started panicking even more, she couldn't feel him anymore, he wasn't responding to her telepathic messages or feel his thoughts or feelings anymore. It was like that connection was blocked or severed and that only happened 1 of 2 ways… Either Stephen found a way to block her out entirely and severed their connection, or the other way was that Stephen was wearing Roger's watch and blocked out any mental intrusion altogether. All she knew at that exact moment was that the man she had fallen deeply in love with had disappeared from their shared connection and couldn't find him anymore.
Looking into John's eyes, "Find Stephen." Was all she had managed to stutter out, not realizing how weak her voice sounded. All she could watch was John teleported out and hoped it wasn't too late and that he was still alive or ok.
A little while later John had returned and he looked angry and pissed off but also deeply troubled as well. As she ran over and asked him what was wrong so had a few others who had surrounded them and was also equally worried for what John had said, they were all worried about where Stephen was and if he was ok. It was easy for Cara to tell that most of them didn't really care about Stephen and only wanted to make sure their ticket to "The Refuge" was secure. John stood there both trying to think of something and at the same time fuming at what he read in Stephen's letter to him. Lashing out at Cara he replied, "He's gone, probably had something to do with you and him sleeping together last night and what you said to him the morning after." John threw her letter at her face and walked off wanting to be alone and away from her.
Cara stood there with a look of horror on her face as she picked up the letter on the ground and stared at it. She knew what ever she read in that letter it would forever change how she saw and felt about this situation. Tears were already running down her face as she walked over to her room and sat down on her bed to open the letter. Reading through the letter several times, each time breaking her heart and shattering it to pieces, she read each word painstakingly slow and it still caused her soul to ache in every way. Stephen had left and was probably never coming back and it was because of her. Cara knew Stephen loved her, but not to this extent or how deep his feelings ran, part of her was over joyed at how much he loves her and wanted her and it filled her heart and soul with a feeling she never experienced before. True love. Then those feelings turned to pain and sorrow and it felt like a knife was shoved deep into her heart and that no matter what she did it wouldn't budge. Cara didn't know how long she sat there crying over and over begging the to words not to be true. Begging Stephen to come back and take her into his arms and tell her that he was sorry and that he still loved her and that this was just a cruel joke and he was sorry. But no matter what, that didn't happen. And she was still on her bed in the lair crying her eyes out and feeling her heart breaking on repeat. It didn't change that Stephen was gone and probably never coming back and it was entirely her fault.
Meanwhile Stephen had boarded the plane and was sitting in coach waiting for the plane to take off, as the stewardess passed by he ordered a coke and popped in his head phones, sending a carefree easy smile at the very attractive stewardess as she gave him his coke he leaned back and hoped the next leg of his journey would help his heart heal. Stephen's thoughts were on his mother and brother and how hurt they would feel, at his Uncle Jed and how far he would go to destroy his friends and people he cared about, and even about Cara and how she would take reading his letter, had she found it now, did it mean anything to her or was she happy he was gone. Whatever it was, Stephen was doing this for him and no one else. As the plane started moving he whispered to himself, "Goodbye Cara," it was time for him to grow, evolve and change into a better version of himself, whatever that version may be.