The Oxymoron

-x-

In this chapter: Shadow makes good on the bet – since he'd won at Laser Force, he has to take Amy out on another date. Amy, while pleasantly suspiciously confused, isn't expecting much; but what is Shadow, if not a careless perfectionist?

-x-

Brooding.

He was probably the undefeated champion of that particular sport; if it wasn't actually a sport, he should make it one, because he was damn good at it.

Shadow did it everywhere, at any time, sometimes for no reason whatsoever. He practiced it daily, even now as he stood there in front of Amy's front door.

… Damn it.

He gave a weary sigh and scratched the back of his head, glaring at the rectangular piece of wood which served as the only physical barrier between him and who he wanted to see. A few nights prior, he had a strange and disturbing revelation, and it involved a certain pink hedgehog. He realized that yes, indeed, there had been a reason why he wanted to see her again so soon; there had been a reason why he watched her so closely that night, dissecting her moods and her actions; there had been a reason why, when he dreamed, he thought about her smile when her eyes were watery with tears.

He knew the reason; he wasn't an idiot who couldn't decipher his own emotions – but that didn't mean he understood them.

He knew about strong, personal bonds. He had experience – a very small one, admittedly – about sincere affection for someone. As it turned out, he actually liked the crazy pink furry, who waved her hammer around like a lunatic when enraged. Once he found that out, he was only a tiny bit reluctant to accept it – it was weird, the way he was feeling about such a polar opposite of his, yet he was smart enough to know that denying one's emotions would get him absolutely nowhere.

He was only confused about one particular little detail – probably the most important of all: to what extent exactly did he like her?

That was a real head-scratcher.

The fact that he hadn't yet found the answer baffled him, even with his soul-searching in a lonely, confined room where he had nothing to do but think of one. Then finally, he came to a decision.

He was going to make Amy tell him the answer. After all, she knew about these kinds of things, about 'affection' and 'love.'

If she said he loved her, then he loved her. If she said he didn't, then, well – he didn't. She was the expert on all things concerned with 'love', right? Right – so he'd let her decide, because she knew best. He didn't need help identifying what he was feeling – it was definitely affection, for sure – but it was exactly what kind of affection that he was unsure of; was it of friendship? Of family? The affection of a guardian to someone he needed to protect? Was it love?

Well, let's see.

It was what this whole thing was about, anyway.

So he rung her doorbell.

A minute or so later, the door swung open. Amy was standing in front of him, her eyes wide with surprise. Then, before he even had the chance to speak, her gaze immediately became panicked and concerned and she asked hurriedly, "Is something wrong?"

Shadow frowned. "What?"

"Is everything okay? Is Sonic alright? What kind of trouble are you guys in now?" she asked hurriedly, clutching the bottom of her trademark red dress in worry. Her emerald eyes pierced through his own, trying to search for answers in that ever-calm red gaze.

Shadow crossed his arms and said roughly, "Rose, I'm not here because I need your help. I'm not here to warn you that your friends need help either. As far as I know, they're in no danger."

Immediately, Amy relaxed, and she stopped clutching her dress. She leaned on her doorframe, relieved yet confused. She smiled at him warily. "Then why are you here, Shadow?"

The dark hedgehog rolled his eyes. "Am I some kind of dark omen for you?" he asked a little sharply. "A Death Bringer? Some sort of creature that forewarns trouble?"

"Well, yeah," Amy said immediately. "I mean, only the last bit, the 'creature that forewarns trouble' thing. You're not really the other two… I think. Maybe." She, although seemed a bit rude, was telling the truth and Shadow knew it. He could probably count on one hand the number of occasions in which he didn't turn up to invite some sort of trouble, or warn them of it, or even be the cause of it. In fact, he probably wouldn't be able to count off a single finger of when he simply dropped in to say 'hello' without impending doom following quickly after.

Which was so unlike her – wherever she went, she brought hope, bright as a morning sky in winter darkness. Because she was strong, and so was the blue hedgehog who would inevitably come to her side, as if he was the one chasing her.

Shadow finally answered with, "I'm not here to cause trouble," – he thinks. "I'm just here to claim my reward."

This time it was Amy who frowned. She stopped leaning on the doorframe and crossed her arms, mimicking him. "What reward?" she asked suspiciously.

"I'm surprised you've forgotten," Shadow countered smoothly. He smirked. "I won the game at Laser Force, did I not? I'm here to claim my winnings."

Confusion flashed in her eyes, followed by more confusion. "B-But we weren't betting on anything, were we? I mean, those stakes were only meant for Sonic and me…"

Shadow shrugged. "You spoke the stakes. I wanted to play. You agreed – I won. I'm surprised we're even arguing about this."

"But those-those weren't our stakes! We didn't even have any! It was only meant to be a fun game-!" Shadow looked at her with blunt, stubborn eyes, her excuses and rambles obviously being dismissed without a care. Amy flushed, a blush smearing her cheeks. "Shadow," she ground out, her eye twitching. "What are you playing at?"

The Ultimate Lifeform shrugged casually. "I'm playing at nothing. Although, I never thought you'd be one to break your word."

Amy glared slightly but then she hid her eyes beneath one of her hands with a deep, patient sigh, as if she couldn't believe what she was seeing and simply wanted it to go away. But then she looked at Shadow through a crack in her fingers and smirked coyly. "You know, if you wanted another date with me, you could've just asked."

Shadow looked away. "Hmph."

His response, oddly enough, made her blush – because he hadn't denied it. She looked at him carefully before saying in a slow and deliberate tone, "But sorry, Shadow, I can't. I've got plans with Sonic right now, so it'll have to wait until another day."

Shadow immediately snapped his gaze onto her, glaring darkly. "Cancel." It was more like a demand than anything else – in fact, he probably saw it as one himself. He wasn't going to take no for an answer.

Amy blinked and then she laughed, quietly at first, but then louder and louder. "Shadow, I was joking! I don't really have plans with anyone! I just wanted to see what you would do." She wiped an imaginary tear from her eye as her laughter died down. "Well, I guess you are serious then. Which, by the way, is weird." His reaction even weirder – did he want to go out with her that badly? "Are we going right now?"

Because she had tricked him, Shadow felt rather annoyed. He glared at her and said tightly, "Yes."

The pink furry rolled her eyes. "Lighten up!" she grinned. Then she looked at her watch. "I'll get ready in ten minutes – just wait out here, please!" Then she slammed the door in his face and rushed to get dressed for her day with Shadow.

Meanwhile, Shadow was left standing there in front of her door. He let out a deep breath, as if he'd been holding it for a long, long time, and looked at the bright, blue sky.

He hoped that Amy could find his answer for him; by the end of the day, he should know.

He should know whether or not he loved her.

-x-

"Shadow… I can't believe it…" Amy clutched his arm, almost too shocked to stand on her own two feet. "How did you…?"

Shadow smirked smugly. "You'd think that when I left G.U.N., I wouldn't take some spoils with me? Besides, it doesn't hurt when you've got an acquaintance who steals jewels for a living."

Snapped out of her surprise, Amy turned to glare at him. "Stealing is wrong, Shadow!"

"Hmph." Shadow wasn't really listening.

Seeing this, Amy rolled her eyes but decided to let the matter go. After all, this place was undoubtedly the most expensive restaurant she's ever been to and she wasn't going to complain about Shadow's suspicious hobbies her entire stay here.

It was a beautiful place, located in one of the fancier hotels in Station Square. It was, to put it simply, a gigantic, golden hall, with chandeliers burning bright and sparkling from the ceiling. Mirrors replaced the walls of the venue and beautiful tables with white lace were placed around the circular dance floor at the centre of the room. In the middle of the dance floor was a raised stage; on it was an orchestra consisting of musicians who played the violins, cello, clarinet, flute and grand piano. People danced in couples around the musicians, so close and so elegant that they might as well have been in a ballroom. It was clear that the musicians were meant to be the central focus of the venue, being placed in the centre, while the couples who danced around it were like petals swaying in the breeze.

And suddenly, Amy felt terribly underdressed with her simple green dress and only a touch of makeup. She cast her gaze down and fidgeted with her hair self-consciously.

No wonder Shadow decided to wear black dress pants, a white-collared shirt and a dark blazer, when on the date a week ago, he'd worn baggy pants and a throw-on shirt.

"I can't believe you didn't tell me that we were going to The Lily," she scowled, deeply.

"Don't worry about it," Shadow whispered into her ear, and as if he could read her thoughts – or, more like, could read her actions, he said, "You look beautiful anyway."

Amy, for not the first time that day, flushed. A receptionist spotted them standing near the entrance and questioned if they'd made a reservation. Shadow replied with a bland, "Yes, under Shadow the Hedgehog."

The receptionist checked, nodded, and then called for a waiter to lead them to a table for two. Amy was still in awe of the place; not only for its sheer size but also for its golden beauty and lovely music. When they finally got seated, Amy couldn't hold it in any longer. She blurted, "How did you know?"

Shadow quirked an eyebrow. "You'll have to be a little bit more specific than that."

"I've always wanted to come here!" she elaborated, excitedly. "I've heard so much about this place – the wonderful setting, the beautiful music, the delicious food; in fact, I heard that it was so romantic that it was the ideal place where people proposed to each other!" It was hard to miss the squeal in her high-pitched voice. "Thank you so much, Shadow!"

Her happiness was contagious; it made Shadow smile, if only slightly. "It's nothing, Rose."

And the rumours weren't lying; the food was heavenly. They made little small talk – like before – but unlike before, it was completely comfortable. Amy was surprised by how well this 'date' was starting out. She was also curious as to exactly why the Ultimate Lifeform wanted to spend a day with her – who was pretty much a stranger, at best no more than an acquaintance. Sure, she'd somehow convinced him not to destroy the planet, and they'd battled alongside each other on rare occasions, but they weren't close – not really. So why had he suddenly taken an interest in her?

She'd finished her food and was about to inquire exactly that when Shadow abruptly stood up. He held out a hand to her, gaze impassive and unreadable.

Amy stared at him – surely he wasn't…? "Shadow?"

He graced her with a slight smile. "Care to dance?"

The pink hedgehog bit her lip nervously, excited and afraid with the way that her heart suddenly started to beat irregularly at the sight of Shadow's hand and smile. For some reason, she found herself making excuses. "But Shadow, I never really pinned you for the slow-dancing type…"

His eyes narrowed and the smile disappeared; Amy regretted the words that made him do that. "I'm not Sonic."

The words were firm and they resonated between the empty air between them like the ringing of a bell.

Shadow was not Sonic.

Amy smiled shakily and took his hand. He wrapped his hand around hers and helped her stand up. "It'll be my pleasure, Shadow." Although Amy tried to make her voice sound confident and aloof – playful, even – it ended up rather soft, quiet, like a whisper in the wind.

And for some reason, the way that Shadow was looking at her made her face burn like it was on fire.

He led her to the dance floor, towards the other couples who had their arms wrapped around each other, swaying to the beautiful music of the mini-orchestra. Shadow placed his hands on her hips without hesitation, causing Amy's face to turn an even darker shade of crimson, but she automatically placed her hands tentatively on his shoulders.

It was obvious that Amy was trying to keep the distance between them as wide as possible and as a result, it made their dancing just a little bit awkward. However, with the narrowed glare of her dark companion, the gap slowly decreased as he slowly and gently pulled her closer. Before Amy knew it, her arms were wrapped around his neck and her head was just a breath away from leaning against his collarbone.

What was she doing?

She softly closed her eyes, the blush still prominent on her cheeks; she wasn't wearing a smile. She was… confused. About the way Shadow so gently held her, about the way his warmth seemed to seep into her bones – about the way her own heart was reacting to everything that he did, as if he were… as if he were…

Then he whispered into her ear and his voice was so close that it startled her, "Rose…"

Abruptly, she pulled away, feeling like her head was going to explode if it became any hotter. She took a couple of steps away from him, almost colliding with another couple. Her face was still overheating when she stuttered, "I-I-I think I've had enough." She couldn't meet his piercing eyes. "Can we… Can we go?"

There was a silence between them for a heartbeat before Shadow replied nonchalantly with, "Sure."

So they left, Shadow's face impassive and Amy's face burning with embarrassment – and the slightest, slightest hint of regret that she was no longer in his arms.

-x-

"Thanks for the day, Shadow. I've had a great time!"

Shadow frowned at her and snatched her wrist before she could dash away. "What are you talking about? It's not over yet."

Amy didn't know how long she could last being around him anymore. She was still feeling a little lightheaded from what happened in the restaurant – what had happened in the restaurant? She didn't want to delve too deeply into it because, for sure, her suspicions were false – in fact, they were so improbable that she was amazed that she'd even suspected it in the first place.

But it couldn't be. Not Shadow.

And definitely not with her.

So calm down before he thinks you're even more of a freak.

"Really?" she squeaked. "Then where else are we going?"

The dark hedgehog scrutinized her for a bit – probably wondering about her strange behaviour – but he allowed his lips to twitch up in a mild smirk. "Some place I believe you'd love."

The way he said it sounded weird to her, like she'd heard something like it before. But before she could ponder on it further, he was already walking away. She jogged slightly to catch up with him, asking him where exactly they were going, but being the stubborn hedgehog he was, he didn't say a word. She didn't have to wait long to find out, though. Before she realized it, they ended up at the entrance of Mobius Dream Amusement Park.

And Amy couldn't help it – the grin that stretched across her face was impossible to hide from the world; or from him.

And he drunk up her smile like it was the only breath of fresh air in a confined room with no windows.

Amy pressed her hands against her cheeks, shaking her head slowly. "I can't believe it." Her eyes practically sparkled as she stared at the amusement park. Even from where they were standing they could hear the laughing shrieks of the people inside and the rattle of machinery as rollercoaster carts zoomed by at ridiculous (but not too ridiculous, like, say, supersonic level) speeds. People were walking in and out of the amusement park, all of them wearing almost identical grins to her own.

"Well?" Shadow asked, thoroughly amused by her childish reaction. "What are you waiting for, Rose?"

Before the last word had even escaped his lips, Amy had snatched his hand and was dragging him towards the entrance. "Shadow, you're unbelievable! Unbelievable!" She turned to glance at him and the happiness in her eyes was in such excess that it made Shadow surprisingly warm. "You're amazing! Come on, let's go – I wanna go on all the rides!"

Although Shadow didn't share her enthusiasm – after all, after you've done Chaos Control about a hundred or so times, the thrill of the mediocre speeds provided by the 'thrill rides' here were laughable, at best – but he enjoyed the way her enthusiasm seemed to make up for the both of them. So he didn't really mind it when Amy dragged him all over the place, making him go on rides with her and challenging him in the game stalls; in fact, after a while, he felt like he was having… fun… himself, God forbid. But only because she was there.

Only because she was always there, holding his hand.

And with this revelation, the confusion he had earlier began to clear, ever so slowly.

-x-

They left the amusement park when it was almost sundown. Amy looked fairly exhausted, while Shadow himself looked like usual: unfazed and apathetic. But there was a smile on his muzzle which he couldn't supress and it didn't help either when Amy constantly grinned at him.

"That was fun!" she beamed. "We should go together again sometime, Shadow!"

And Shadow made a secret smile and glanced at her softly, saying, "… You've got yourself a promise there, Rose."

Amy didn't notice the change in his tone or the warmth in his eyes. She stretched her arms above her head, beginning a yawn, but then Shadow quickly intervened. "I hope you're not tired," he said, rather blandly. "Because we've got one more stop to go to."

"What? It's still not over yet?" She didn't want Shadow to misunderstand – she really did enjoy spending her time with him. But with all the energy she'd spent at the amusement park, she was feeling rather tired. "Is it far?"

Then, to her utter shock, Shadow picked her up without prior warning. She flushed in embarrassment, hoping that no one was watching – and knowing with certainty that they were – and she screeched, "Shadow! What do you think you're doing? Put me down!"

"Hush," he whispered to her, his breath tickling her nose. His crimson eyes bore into hers like they were commanding her to be quiet and be still. "The place I have in mind will take us forever to get to – with your speed. Just close your eyes, Rose, and I'll simply take you there."

A moment's panic gripped her – did she trust Shadow enough to know that he wouldn't carry her off to some dangerous place where she'd feel uncomfortable? Did she even trust him at all? But as she stared up at him, she was already feeling herself relaxing. "Hmm…" Then she closed her eyes and simply rested her head against his chest, as if it was the most natural thing in the world.

She did trust him.

There was something in his bloody red eyes – something warm and kind, like the flickers of a gentle fire – that soothed her.

She felt the wind again as he started to run (skate?), the air cool against her skin as it ruffled her fur. Like Shadow promised, he arrived at his destination in no time. When Amy felt him stop, she slowly blinked her eyes open. Shadow put her down on her own two feet and turned her towards the sunset.

And she felt tears prick her eyes.

Because the sunset was beautiful and it pierced through her heart.

The golden sun was sinking beneath the horizon, hiding behind the irregular heights of the city buildings. But it was the sky that held her attention the most – a mesh of gold, orange, pink and blue, a beautiful combination of colours that blended in together like a painting. And beyond those colours – a deep, dark black, just beginning to show the signs of existing stars. As they stood there on the edge of a cliff, she could see everything with vivid clarity and suddenly, everything that happened today made sense to her.

"I chose this place specifically. I know that it isn't a big, fancy restaurant, but Sonic hates those kinds of places – he says that the music was too slow and the people too quiet."

She covered her mouth with her hands, unable to stop the tears from falling. She slowly sunk to her knees until she was sitting, her sobs soundless, as if reluctant to break the silent beauty before her very eyes.

The restaurant, vivid and beautiful and silent, except for the slow, beautiful music that wafted through the air like life itself.

Shadow watched her sink to the grassy ground and again he was filled with concern. He sat behind her, cross-legged, and questioned quietly, "Rose?"

"Silly. I wasn't planning of ever dancing. Sonic wouldn't have wanted to and I wouldn't have forced him. It was just a nice place, that's all, with good music."

Slowly, Amy turned towards him and met his gaze. Her lips quivered as she asked, "Why did you want to go out with me, Shadow?"

And he danced with her slowly, arms securely around her, and she couldn't help but bask in the warmth that he gave her; heart that beat against hers, hands that said he'd never let go – and his voice, full of wonder and appreciation and precious slowness, "Rose…"

"I wanted to take you out, Rose," he answered, staring at her unblinkingly. "And we made bets."

"The place I wanted to go to next was the night-time amusement park with the rides. But then I thought about Sonic – I mean, he's the fastest thing alive, so he wouldn't be excited by a rollercoaster ride. And who cared about the height, too? He's fallen from space! I'm sure a hundred metres above ground won't faze him anymore. There's nothing else in an amusement park besides those thrill rides – just little baby ones and game stalls. And Sonic wouldn't have liked doing those things either; it would've been too boring."

Her tears fell faster. "That's not what I mean, Shadow, and you know it! You know what I'm talking about!"

Her happiness when she simply had fun with him, enjoying the fact that he was by her side; it was her happiness, her joy, her thrill – it made her smile, knowing that this type of 'fun' did not endanger their lives, and she wouldn't end up all alone one day.

Shadow clenched his fists softly on his lap, certainly knowing where this was going. But even though he had been eager to find out in the beginning – determined, even – now he just felt a little bit nervous… and perhaps a bit afraid.

"Yeah, well, you have to keep Sonic's interest somehow. What better way to do so than with a little friendly competitive game?"

"Shadow?"

With them, there was no need for a 'friendly competitive game', because even without it, without its stakes and its bets, they actually wanted to be together again – they didn't have to worry about 'winning' anything.

"I just wanted…" Shadow started, holding her eyes, "I just wanted to determine whether or not I loved you."

"He would've loved the fireworks, Shadow. Sonic would have, definitely! It was just his kind of thing! He would have loved today, Shadow… He was going to love me."

And even though Amy was expecting it, she gasped in shock once she heard his words. She held her hands over her mouth and stared back at him, at his crimson eyes that were piercingly gentle.

Eyes that said that she didn't need to do anything special; she didn't need to force herself. She didn't need to plan or to plot or to study or to chase – it came as naturally as a smile, a smirk, a quick glancing of green and ruby eyes.

And the sunset.

Had he known?

That fireworks were gone too quickly for her – that she hated how they only shone for the briefest of moments before they died and trickled away, the colours fading into the blackness of the sky?

Did he know – that she did not want a love like that, did not really care for fireworks? Because they were fickle things, exploding with passion one second and then quickly disappearing, as if they never existed?

Sonic would have loved them, for sure, because he was dynamic and quick – they would've held his interest for just the right amount of time before he got bored with their lights. Then he'd go searching elsewhere, towards something new, something exciting, searching for that brief explosion of passion and adrenaline to hold his interest again before he moved on.

That was who he was.

But that wasn't who Amy was.

And had Shadow known that? Known all of this?

That she loved the sunsets and the sunrises, because they were constant and daily and utterly dependable? The colours that had mixed with the fireworks – the blues, the pinks, the reds and greens – looked so artificial compared to the natural blends made by a sunset – the reds and pinks, fading into the dark blue, the black.

Had Shadow known all of this?

Had he learned who Amy really was, from a single night?

Shadow's eyes spoke it all: yes, he had.

He cupped her cheek, brushing away her tears with his thumb. "Rose," he said again, closer than Amy remembered him being a moment ago. "Do I love you?"

And before she could answer, he closed the gap between them, tenderly stealing a kiss.

Something exploded inside of her, just as something collapsed inside of him. Amy's lips parted – ever so slightly – and Shadow traced the insides of her mouth with his tongue. He pulled her face closer, deepening the kiss, feeling like he was suffocating himself in the scent that was Amy.

But then he pulled back and he stared into her eyes with the utmost seriousness: "Do I love you, Amy Rose?"

And she found that her mouth was dry, the beating of her heart so loud that it deafened her. She could barely see him through her mind's haziness, her thoughts scattered and frenzied.

He'd studied her. Just like how she studied Sonic.

He'd planned this day. Just like how she planned that night for Sonic.

He'd tried to make her fall in love with him – just like how she tried to make Sonic fall in love with her.

Why?

Was it… love?

"No," someone said – it sounded like her. "Shadow, I think you're confused." Yes, it was definitely her voice. "You don't love me; it's impossible." She gave a shaky grin at him but she couldn't meet his red, crimson gaze; her eyes were downcast, trying to conceal her lie. "It's not love."

Before Shadow could speak, Amy stood up quickly. "But don't be disheartened, Shadow! After all, that's what dates are for, right? To see if you love the other person or not? Sorry, but you don't love me, and I would know after all! But thank you anyway for today, Shadow. I had fun. I'll see you later, okay?" Then she walked around him and without a second's delay, she dashed off, still not looking at him, still hiding the truth from her own heart.

"All it took was a day."

That was the truth.

And Amy tried to bury it.

Because she couldn't fall in love with Shadow – just as he couldn't fall in love with her. She ran and she ran, not knowing where she was going, only knowing that she had to get away from him.

Get away from the truth, even though she knew it was impossible, because the truth was already inside her, scorching her heart.

She laughed bitterly to herself. Why had Shadow gone out of his way to make this day perfect?

He was such a careless perfectionist.

She wondered if he knew… just what kind of trouble he'd gotten them into.

-x-

Meanwhile, as Amy ran, Shadow trailed after her, silently and quickly, making sure she didn't discover him. He was going to make sure that she got home okay, even in her flustered state.

But why was he doing this? Why did he care?

Amy, the expert on love, had said that he didn't in fact love her. He'd told himself in the beginning, hadn't he, that he'd trust her judgement on this particular matter? That he'd leave it well enough alone if it wasn't as he suspected?

But Shadow was smarter than that. He'd known the answer to his question long before she spoke her lie.

He understood her infatuation with Sonic a little better now. He understood why she put so much effort into her 'date' with him. He understood why she cried when he wasn't there.

When he'd kissed her, he suddenly understood that unfamiliar ache in his chest. So of course, he didn't believe her when she said that he didn't love her.

Shadow the Hedgehog couldn't be tricked that easily, and he was going to dedicate himself fully to proving her wrong.

He was always right and he always got what he wanted – and he knew, after today, that he wanted Amy Rose.

-x-

A/N: There you go, the second chapter, early too! At this rate, the next and last one (I think) is right around the corner as well :) Hope you've enjoyed! And thank you to all my reviewers!

Ja ne.