Chapter 2: I sell my soul to Furry Satan and get super powers...
A/N: Wow… you guys are pretty cool! Shout out to Mari (Guest) for being the first to review! I will do my best! This chapter is dedicated to your review! Also still working on several other stories so updates may be sporadic! Thanks!
Disclaimer: This is written from my very ADD perspective. I will try to tone it down this chapter but… again writing from a 'Chad' perspective.
Hey…
…
Before you go off on me I just wanna clear something up.
I was minding my own business… I really was…
At that moment I was facing down an angry Jonin in a game of chicken with nothing but a knife, the Hokage's grandson, an S-rank jutsu, and a gut feeling. Oh… I think I still had half a pulled pork sandwich but that's besides the point…
I can't make this shit up. Sometimes life is really that crazy.
Okay…
Here's what happened…
Sakura was… not eager to see Naruto again…
The day was chilly as the summer months would give way into fall. Their three month long break after becoming Genin was to give Clans the opportunity to test and train their young, many of which had built traditions around graduation and the learning of their specialized techniques.
She knew that he would be there for team placement, even though there were some rumors that said he had failed the test, Sakura, who had seen him first hand and knew what he was capable of, knew this was next to impossible.
She just wished they had parted on better terms…
'But you can't do that!' Sakura whined as Naruto completely took out her pieces. Shogi, supposed to help teach kids how to 'war', was encouraged in the academy as a game to play during free time.
Problem was they were not playing Shogi.
'But I did. Now what'cha gonna do 'bout it?' Naruto said as he sunk her destroyer.
Battleship, played on paper was easily a better game.
'D-7!' Sakura called out viciously. Good, but keep a clear head.
'Hit.' Naruto said marking the hit on his carrier. 'A-1.'
Sakura slumped. 'H-hit… you win…'
'Ya nearly had me puttin' yer ships diagonally.' Naruto said. Sakura was also not above cheating by moving her pieces when she thought he wasn't looking. He did nothing to discourage this since he claimed he was playing a game that was supposed to simulate a 'war'. 'Nobody plays fair in a war.' He said.
'But you… you just kept them there! Also how come I was only able to fire one shot, but you were able to fire off three?!' Sakura said pointing at him.
He winced. He was also a massive cheater…
'Because… reasons?' He smiled only to get slugged on the arm. 'Look war ain't always fair. As Genin we are going to be facin' opponents that are way stronger than us and-'
'But we won't!' Sakura said angrily standing up. He looked up at her. She had grown into a powerful ninja, but she was still thirteen and her emotions spilled over. 'We won't ever face these massive threats! We will be facing at most an angry cat! Maybe when we get to Chunin level they might have us fight other people, but even then we are not gonna be actively trying to murder each other! Humans are not that evil!'
He stared at her. 'Sakura what-'
'I am sick of this shit! You are acting like some crazy person that thinks the world is ending! My parents were Genin! During the war! They had none of this shit happen! None of the shit you keep talking about happened to them! They were in the reserves and they were fine! They even saw battle a few times and it was handled by Chunin and Jonin!' Sakura said shaking. He tried to open his mouth to speak but she cut him off.
'I keep telling you this and you keep brushing me off!' Sakura said effectively brushing him off, knowing that if she kept talking he couldn't form a proper counter argument. It was just how he was... 'You think you are sooo cool because you think bad things are going to happen! You know what!? I don't believe you! If you don't, stop I'm done! You're crazy! You spend all day coming up with ways to kill people! I'm going to become a Genin, serve my five year commitment and then leave! I'm gonna marry the boy of my dreams and we are going to have a wonderful little family!'
'Sakura… Sasuke ain't all that-' He started; Sakura turned white. He frowned. 'Sakura it was obvious…'
Sakura had tears of frustration in her eyes.
'I hate you.' She said running off.
Sakura glared at the road. The problem with that… was she had already changed herself to better fit Naruto's twisted world view. She didn't believe that there could be the things Naruto said could happen, but there was an unease coiled in her heart. People attacking and trying to kill her simply for wearing a headband with a different mark. Sakura felt a primal gnawing in her chest. This almost panic inducing unease that never left her in a safe place. Naruto obviously didn't mean for it to happen, but it was there. It was like everything was wrong but at the same time everything was fine.
Her mother and father would reassure her that there was nothing to fear. It was a time of peace. A time of faith in the system. The Hokage would strike down the evil in this world.
Just thinking of that kind of world was… making her feel things she shouldn't.
Like there was anything besides what the Hokage described. Sakura kept walking. The Will of Fire stated that her top priority be to help the ninja world by making the village great and by sharing what was learned with the next generation… but Naruto…
The things he spoke of terrified her. Is this really the future she wanted?
Did she have a choice?
Sakura shook her head and took a deep breath. She would fight and die for this village with honor if that ever came. Naruto was a fool for questioning his place in the village. Questioning the Hokage. She was right for breaking off her friendship with him.
While… Sakura's heart clenched.
While he was her first friend he was also a bad influence. He would turn the world on its ear one day.
Sakura kept walking. She had an assignment to get to…
A young blonde boy ruffled her hair awkwardly and smiling gently. A young neglected girl finally receiving praise. Not for anything she did or didn't do. She didn't need to 'earn' it. Didn't want anything in return. She was a person to him and she-
Sakura ran.
Staring.
Just look ahead. Don't make eye contact. Don't let the looks get to you…
Shit…
Just… just be someone else…
That's it… easy now.
I turn down a corner and unseal my bag.
Just be… someone else…
Hitomi was at the grocery store. She was a middle aged woman with soft brown hair, slightly drooping eyes and a kindly smile. She was currently trying to find groceries for her three children at home. Had to get the best deals on discount and buy enough for a while. Her husband was an office worker who was constantly changing jobs, but he was always going on about how lucky he was.
She walked with a slight limp. She had bad knees. Probably due to herself being slightly overweight. She couldn't say no to those new fangled pastries from the continent… She was trying to lose the weight by getting her family to eat healthier, but she was still struggling to lose those last twenty pounds. She lamented the fact she would never get the body back she had at twenty…
Hitomi wandered over to the magazine section and paged through the knitting section reading about the new patterns and eventually checked out.
Wandering back to the apartment Hitomi sighed. She missed her husband. Her children were getting older and her youngest was thinking about joining the academy despite her reservations.
Yes. Hitomi was a normal woman with normal problems. Turning down the corner to her home 'Hitomi' disappeared in a puff of smoke and I was allowed to be myself once more. I checked over Hitomi's groceries. Should be enough to last me a while…
In case you were wondering, yes, I really get in character. Ever since I learned the Transformation jutsu it has easily become my most well used jutsu. I can do it in a single hand sign and with a lot more skill than most anyone in my class. Nobody gets into character. It was sad. They were trying to teach kids to blend in and be spies when they couldn't even act! Acting was a big thing. Especially to a guy who had been a theater kid most of his life.
See, Sasuke can look the part of an older gentleman, can memorize certain tells, and information that the man would need to know, but he couldn't become Old Man Kintaro. He didn't study how a carpenter's hands look to get the callouses right. The slight gleam, or lack thereof, when talking about his trade. He couldn't spit the breeze with the other old codgers talking about the price of rice going up, or remember the slight scent of old man body odor and dollar store cologne of a man too old to give a shit or had lost his sense of smell years ago. The slight tells that made Old Man Kintaro… himself…
Today I was going to have a chicken sandwich. Those bread crumbs were not going to make 'sweet potato tempura' that Hitomi was planning on using them for. Oh no… it was going to be used in some good ole American cooking! Lettuce, tomatoes, fried chicken. American fried chicken. I was even planning on somehow, some way making ketchup. Yet another treat I had lost…
Peanut butter, marshmallows, cheddar cheese, ketchup and root beer floats were all things I had dearly missed… I think I would actually kill for a jar of Skippy peanut butter and white Wonder Bread. You can find jelly just fine but peanut butter? Hell no. Closest thing I found was Pad Thai peanut sauce… Blech… What I wouldn't give for an actual peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Hell I'll take a grilled cheese! Also… Nachos. They don't have jalapeños here! Or sour cream! Or even cumin to make taco spice! What I wouldn't give even for a shred of Mexican food! Enchiladas, Chile Verde, Chile Rancheros, hell even Tex-mex would be heavenly! I've gone twelve years without a taco, and I don't think that is healthy!
I was thus dreaming of cultured perfection when I was interrupted by a Genin running errands. Wait… is that Tenten?
She turned to me seriously. "Message: The Hokage would like to speak with you. Please come as soon as possible. End Message."
I nod. You know when in the show when the Hokage says summon a ninja to their office? Well… that's exactly how it happens, either that or the birds. More specifically messenger hawks with a specific number of stripes on their wings. As I fished out my wallet to tip her I remembered my groceries.
"Shit… Do me a favor and take these home for me?" I ask indicating to the armful of groceries. Tenten nods.
"Name and location?" Tenten asked.
"Naruto Uzumaki, the brown apartment complex on the top east side balcony facing the Monument. Tack it on to the mission pay…" I said handing her the groceries and fishing out my wallet. Well purse in this case. As I said before, I get really into character.
Tenten looks pointedly at said purse… I sigh. "No I didn't steal it. It was for a Transformation. I like being incognito when I shop, and I get really in character. Now ya want the tip or not?"
Tenten smiles when I hand her a One Thousand note. Best estimate about ten bucks tip for a twenty buck mission. "Thanks! Any perishables?"
"Yeah… just leave em on the balcony in the shade. Should be good for an hour at least…" I said putting the money I would need into my actual wallet and handing her the purse Hitomi had been using. Curious, Tenten peaked inside. Sending her a withering glare she sheepishly puts the bag over her shoulder and hops away. My food will be at my house in about five minutes give or take. Hitomi's cherry red lip gloss better not be missing this time… Tenten was a real doll, a peach… but I know kunoichi. All of em are chronic makeup klepto. Last three times I got one of em to do a mission for me, my lip gloss and mascara was suspiciously missing…
What?
Ugh… Fine! I'll explain.
Remember how I told ya that the crime rate was pretty bad?
Well… pickpockets.
If ya actually want to be anonymous, ya gotta give 'em the right shit to steal. If I am wandering around as Hitomi I carry the purse. If I am Old Man Kintaro I have a worn leather wallet and carry a wad of cash in my left breast pocket. If I am little Shinra, Hitomi's youngest, I usually have about six hundred ryo for lunch money or my allowance and a hat.
Details matter.
So, if I have a purse then I have to have what Hitomi would have in that purse. Basic make-up lip gloss and mascara, maybe a little foundation for those embarrassing break outs, some ID, tissues, some odds and ends like a spare hair scrunchy, a paper clip, some receipts and a small amount of change at the bottom of the bag with some crumbs from something. Old Man Kintaro has a faded picture of his wife, which was honestly a cut out of an old magazine that I had aged and retrofitted, some coupons, a gambling ticket, a library card and a spare key he honestly can't remember what it goes to. It was just the basics. Stuff people don't really think about but if checked I could provide.
And yes I can apply said make up! I also have Tomoyo, Ryo and Nagisa to be! Two of them are females between the ages of twenty and fifteen. They not only know how to apply make up but how to look good in it! Or at least they think they do. Ryo is still new to wearing makeup, so she occasionally smudges the eyeliner around the corners. She was a shy and introverted child…
I end up walking down the street as shy little Ryo. Backup wallet/purse ready and quick scent change from 'Slightly greasy from working in the kitchen to prepare for my children coming home from school, low income housewife on a grocery run' to 'Apple/cherry blossom my friend gave me to try, do you think it smells nice? I hope so and I am so nervous because I didn't shower after helping mom out in the kitchen! Eeep!'.
This is done with a quick spritz of the right scent and a slight chemical blocker. My gait changes to the longer legs of a sixteen year old girl and I ignore the discomfort of walking like you don't actually have something between your legs. I do my slight nervous ticks for Ryo. Biting my lower lip, wiping my long hair away from my eyes, tugging on my skirt and checking to see if my bra strap moved and added a slight bounce to my step to add the nervous energy Ryo would have walking up the Hokage's office.
'Ryo' was here to place a mission and would excuse herself to the bathroom, nervously glancing around before disappearing on the way there. She would be back in a few minutes as she got lost trying to find the room after having to wait outside since she thought there was someone in there, but it turned out that it was empty the whole time.
I sighed as I changed my scent again. It was a habit at this point. I now smelt like 'Trying the new dandruff shampoo, low income, kinda tired, whaddaya want?'
It was a subtle art… One I spent many hours trying to get exactly right. I was a Jinchuriki. My identity and what I contained was supposed to be a secret and I intended to keep it that way. The extra work I had to put into it, the make-up, the scent blockers and the slight odor changes, all of that was to keep Papa Nuke safe from the bad guys.
And to keep the damn stares from off my back… bastards… My high school years as that weird theater kid that also liked science and math and had a background in outdoorsy shit helped to…
I entered the Hokage's office with a slight knock. He glanced up from his paper work, pipe in his mouth and smoking like a chimney. I slip into my most well used roll. Naruto Uzumaki, the slightly jaded yet still loyal preteen with a wild imagination and a hero complex… It was mostly true… He didn't know what I actually thought of the village nor did he know that I planned on becoming Hokage just so I could run the village better than him. At least I think so… To him I am still this lonely child who just wants people to acknowledge him and to make the world a better place.
The best way to hide a lie was with truth.
I am lonely. I have nobody in my 'age group' who is my mental equal and nobody my mental age that will actually take me seriously. In a world that has so many contradictions it is a challenge. We are ninja but we are also soldiers. Seen yet unseen. We have the technological capacity to create shuriken launchers, wooden battle puppets, and televisions yet haven't figured out the gun, airplane, or car… There is a 'japanese' vibe to everything, yet there are some things that are so stereotypically American or European in nature that it is almost laughable. For example tomatoes, chocolate, and pastries. Even volleyball. Chairs, tables, beds… some of it is pure Japanese however I don't remember upright chairs, tables built for those chairs, and four post beds being traditional Japanese interior design.
The Hokage is at a desk… in an upright chair… smoking tobacco… a traditionally American plant, just ask the Natives… maybe it is like the sweet potato thing but with a whole bunch of other things? Ideas even? I find myself subconsciously judging the structure of this world… If you are going to have a Japanese setting then make the setting Japanese. I can grab a donut, a Texas donut to be exact, at a bakery from a guy wearing a kimono like it is the most average thing in the world. The kid right behind me in line however was wearing a cotton spun t-shirt with plastic printing on the front… I love and hate this place…
I stroll up to the Kage like it is the most normal thing in the world.
"Sup." I said in classic American, respecting yet disrespecting authority. "Ya called me?"
The Hokage glanced up and checked the time. "Hmm… gonna need to give her a raise… Yes! I have a serious issue with your photo and seeing how you presented yourself in it."
"Shit… I blinked didn't I?" I asked wincing.
"No… much more serious than that. Although we would still need to re-take the photo if that were the case." The Hokage stated. "I am talking about the fact you chose not to wear your headband in the proper location."
"Eh?" I ask with utmost sophistication… man I'm an idiot… "Excuse my question, but doesn't Ino Yamanaka wear it around her waist? Also Hinata Hyuuga wears hers around her neck, a better spot if you ask me, and my… Ms. Haruno wear it like a headband to hold back her hair? Hell, Shikamaru wears it around his arm."
"Young Shikamaru also gets chewed out by his mother everyday for it. The fact is, is that we like our young men to wear their headbands on their heads. The way you, as our soldier, chose to display yourself is worrying and socially unacceptable." The Hokage stated. "There is also the fact you aren't wearing it now."
I wince again. "Ah… you caught me shopping. I was incognito at the time."
"Understandable…" The Hokage nodded but there was a serious glint in his eye. At that moment I could believe this old grandfatherly monkey man actually led armies and was the military dictator of a powerful nation of literal ninja… "However you are a special case. You need to be presentable at all times. Do you know what I am speaking of?"
"Nine-tails." I said softly. Inwardly I was panicking. I screwed up!
"And how did you come to find out you contain the Nine-tails?" The Hokage asked with more steel in his voice than ever. I repressed the urge to flinch. Shit he's scary!
"Um… I kinda… figured it out?" I said. The Hokage stared at me as if to prompt me to continue. "The staring okay! It was the staring!"
I told him how I felt walking down the street. Like something out of place, like there was something wrong with me.
"So I figured either my old man did something really bad or I was some kind of minority. Kinda like a someone from Lightning coming here." I said. Lightningers were cool. They were like the 'black people' of this world. I never thought I would see a black man in Asian land but there he had been. All smooth and cool like. Granted I was like three and my head was still trippy, but I still recognized it. He even gave me a fist bump! Sadly this was Asian land, and everyone was low-key racist anyway like everyone else, so he got stared at too…
The Hokage sighed and then looked at me with a mixture of familiarity, regret, and affection. "Sounds like you are rather insightful. Yes. You contain the Nine-tailed Fox. I had hoped you would not find out about it until you were older."
"Um… why?" I asked in sheer confusion. And before you ask! I know it is supposed to be some kind of 'chosen one that doesn't know the power they posses'. I get why the writer did that but that is not the reason the Hokage did that. I know I am in an anime. Never forgot that part, but I also know that this is real. This is reality. I can and will die here. In this body. I'd rather it be later rather than sooner.
"I wanted you to have some small semblance of a normal childhood." The Hokage confided. "I wanted you to grow up without thinking of yourself as a living weapon…"
"Then you put me in ninja school." I stated. "I get it. I am a valuable commodity. Needs protection and all that but if you wanted that why not show me the village is something to protect?"
The Hokage looked up. I continued.
"I have seen this village and all it is. I know about a lot of the crime that happens in this town. It's actually kinda hard to miss. While I don't hate the village, I will admit I don't have the strongest of loves for it." I admitted. "But my friends live here. I'll protect them, and the other kids. We'll survive this place and make a better world… and if I have to make a whole new village, a whole new government, striking down the old and building a new one to do so, then I will. So until then… you don't have to worry so much about the village gramps. I'll help protect this place."
I watched the eyes of the Kage carefully. This was what I have been keeping from him after all. To my surprise he didn't seem angry I just bad mouthed the village. He seemed… tired. Really, really tired and… happy?
"May I tell you a story Naruto?" The Hokage said glancing up. I nod and watch as he gets up and looks out his window to see the village, taking a deep dreg of his pipe.
"Once the world was even worse than it was now. The average ninja never reached thirteen, let alone adulthood. My grandfather had my father when he was fourteen and then died leaving my grandmother a widow at the age of sixteen. Children… so many children… they died fighting for their clans and for what? A future they would never taste.
"My master, Tobirama Senju, grew up in this time… as did his beloved older brother Hashirama, the First Hokage, the God of Shinobi." The Hokage glanced at me before continuing. "Following the death of their brother Itama Senju Hashirama had grown bitter towards his own family. Together with his friend Madara they created the idea of a village. A home. A place where multiple families, multiple clans could live together in peace and actually watch their children grow old.
"To say that he struggled to fulfill his dream is the understatement of the century. He fought for every inch of this place. Defending them from invaders from all sides. Master Tobirama developed a jutsu specifically so he could be at his brother's side in an instant to support him in every fight after finishing battles with multiple S-rank opponents. I can honestly say that I wouldn't be surprised if you told me that the reason this place is so well forested is because the First Hokage bled from every pore and spilled it all over this place. Entire sections of the forest were destroyed and then… like a miracle… regrown overnight.
"Lord Hashirama… after the battles would regrow them and rebuild houses. He became the world's most accomplished medic healing everyone after every battle and keeping his forces alive, well stocked and well fed. Even when people began to praise him as a god for his works he was humble. Child-like and teachable and a man of good cheer. He was everyone's hero.
"His fatal flaw however was that he was a good friend. His friend, Madara, the one that helped him build their dream of the village, became disillusioned with the village. He saw what you do, crime, evil, and even betrayal of entire clans and thought, 'This is not what I dreamed for my children'. He attacked Hashirama multiple times because he saw his old friend as one who believed in a pipe dream. No one could have peace in this world of ninja and death and suffering.
"And Hashirama was a fool for believing in it still, but he endured. Praying that his old friend would change his mind until one day. But it was not to be.
"Madara declared that unless Hashirama came to fight him, he would destroy the village by pulling a star out of the sky and as a warning and proof he could he decimated the other hidden villages, either destroying their entire infrastructure by burning their crops like in the Land of Wind and or killing their first Kage like a wolf among sheep. Finally Hashirama, seeing the devastation his friend was causing rebuilt the villages in a single day and then confronted his friend.
"Their Water style jutsu created new lakes and rivers.
"Their Earth style created new mountains.
"Their Wind style created new plains.
"Their Fire style created new deserts.
"And their lightning style created new valleys and craters in the earth.
"The two friends fought like gods. I will admit to seeing a star called down from the sky and a mighty blue warrior and a giant wooden buddha from all the way back in the Hidden Leaf village to where they fought in the valley of the end. The buddha caught the falling star and crushed it before the blue warrior severed the tops of mountains. In the end Hashirama prevailed saying to his friend 'I will protect this village with my life and strike down any who would dare threaten it, whether it be a friend, a brother, or my very own child. I will defend this village.' He died after that battle leaving my predecessor and master Tobirama to lead this village.
"Having seen the disgusting things of this village like Madara, yet still believing in the dream of his brother he led the village the best he could. He set up the military police to see if he couldn't stop the crimes. He founded the academy, the defense structures, the barrier seal keeping us hidden in plain view and tried to repair relations with the other villages. But… his term as Hokage only lasted about two years. He was attacked by an unknown assailant during a conference with the Raikage and nearly defeated. The attacker got away.
"Stone, who was blamed for the attack pointed their fingers at Mist, who had garnered a name for themselves as assassins, and thus began a blood feud between them. For neither forgave the other and an escalation of petty grievances pointed at them cause Stone to close it's boarders. Things were looking bad… A world war was brewing. On the way to a peace talk with Stone I was invited to attend as one of Tobirama's students we were ambushed. I was only seventeen when he appointed me Hokage and the next to lead the village while he drew off the enemy attacking us ultimately giving his life so we might escape.
"Personally… I believe Tobirama allowed himself to die. Whether it be that he thought the enemies he fought would only cease stirring up trouble if he died or that by doing so he would finally end his suffering of depression and be re-united with his beloved brother and all the brothers he lost I don't know.
"What I do know is that I was seventeen and leading a village on the brink of a world war. The first of it's kind. The fighting lasted three years and I became known as 'the professor' for being able to counter enemy tactics quickly by deducing their function and countering them. I personally broke Onoki the Fence-sitter's back after making his fabled Dust Release explode in his face. I fought the Third Raikage in a battle that lasted five days. I fought the Third Kazekage ironically named 'Kazekage' and dismantled his Magnet Release. I outsmarted my opponents and thought I was leading the village to a new golden age.
"I was a fool. The worst was yet to come.
"The Second world war began with an escalation between us and Stone. They thought we had humiliated them in not only the first war, but also for Madara. Onoki, was both a blessing and a cursing. He chose not to escalate the fighting, but he was also not above sending spies and their ilk around the village to sabotage us in our sleep. We were at war yet not. A Cold War. The damn finally broke when they tried to steal our Forbidden scroll, the scroll of the Second Hokage's jutsu, and even managing to gain the Shadow Clone jutsu and spread it around like a whore spreads herpes. A brave boy, the First Hokage's grandson died alerting us to them and trying to stop them.
"He was unfortunately murdered by a wielder of Lava style… he died horribly and slowly. Seeing this I lost it. I declared war and soon it was us verses Stone, Lightning, and a starving Sand village. I broke Sand first and forced them to ally with us before fighting a long, bloody battle between us and Stone and Lightning for two years. Then the longest and bloodiest battle occurred when the feud between Stone and Mist escalated following the joint assault of Lightning and Mist on the Village Hidden in the Eddies. A village aligned with the Leaf and one of our staunchest allies, the Uzumaki's. Your namesake.
"Following their assault we joined the fray and became part of the bloodiest battle in history since the Warring States Period, the Third Shinobi War. Beforehand the villages would squabble amongst themselves mainly but Mist, with their newly appointed Third Mizukage, a monster named Uta, began their tradition of slaughter. They would force children, academy students, to murder each other in order to graduate… such a thing, on such a scale was the norm. A place where blood and horror reigned. It was no longer about the skill of the ninja but who had the best reputation, many would command the shinobi under their control to slaughter entire villages of civilians. Rouge ninja became more prevalent, bandit camps garnered more favor with civilians as a way to protect themselves, experimental medicine trying to make shinobi stronger, faster, more resilient, and to make it all happen at a quicker rate.
"The atrocities committed during this war… were enough that a single man, like an angel of death, called out 'No more.'. He was fast. So fast in fact they say he garnered the favor of death itself. He made his mark, however, at the Battle of Kanabi bridge, the bloodiest battle in the war. S-rank, A-rank, even the lowly Genin… he spared none. They were gone as fast as the eye could blink. Faster even.
"In a mere minute he butchered over two thousand. That man became known as the Fourth Hokage, the one who defeated the Nine-tails with the help of Death and sealed it inside your blood and bone. This is the history of the Hokage. This is the history of the villages. The history of the Kage…
"Naruto… you may not think much of this village but that doesn't change that men, good men and women have fought and died for this village. All while wearing that headband. You must decide for yourself if their sacrifice was worth it to you and if they shouldn't be honored by you wearing that same headband, in it's rightful place on your brow, to defend the new generation and give them something to look towards. This is the Will of Fire." The Hokage said seriously. "I know you will become a strong ninja and when you become Hokage you have my blessing to do what you think is best for the village as I have."
I had been staring a hole in the floor the entire spiel… I nodded my head. The Hokage seemed pleased. He didn't notice the way my eyes looked or maybe he did and thought it was a look of determination.
It wasn't.
What I didn't find out till later was that there was a set of beady black eyes that shone like little beetles staring at me from a crack in the door. After I left that person would change my life forever.
I left his office with pleasantries and a promise to do better. As soon as I left I became Ryo again, happy blissfully unaware Ryo, and not have to think about the shit spewing outta his mouth, because I couldn't stand being in the same room as him anymore.
I, at that moment, was completely and totally disgusted. Not in some 'teen angst', not 'trying to be different and defying the system', but true disgust at this man.
The Hokage… he used the lives of the fallen to justify why he did things. That was what the Will of Fire meant to him. At least that was what I got. I was trying desperately to not think about that shit, but his words kept running through my head.
'It was their dream; I'm just trying to protect it'
'They started the wars and we were unfortunately caught in the middle'
'I am not at fault for the way the shinobi world is'
'It was worse back then, then it is now. You should be grateful for what you have'
'At least it isn't as bad as some of the things happening in other nations'
Excuses… and total bullshit. And people bought it.
The Hokage conveniently forgot to mention a lot of things in his little 'history lesson'. History is written by the winners. No country was infallible. No country, especially one led by the decisions of a single man in a system such as this one, would be able to survive without also committing some of the same 'atrocities' as the other villages. Otherwise Orochimaru and Danzo wouldn't be a thing. The Massacre wouldn't have happened. And a whole host of other bad decisions.
The shit Orochimaru did… under Danzo's orders… and also probably under the orders of the Hokage… The Fourth was also a monster…
No wonder Stone hates us! Between Madara and the Fourth I see no reason why they would ever trust us again! We basically started at least the second and forced the others into an 'unconditional surrender'.
Tobirama was the one who created the whole village system. He was the reason children are told to kill their emotions and serve the militarized state. He was the teacher of Danzo and the Third Hokage… He created the Chunin exams where every six months the villages send children to fight and die for 'honor'. It was for money and those exams were nothing but glorified discount Hunger Games…
I entered my apartment and threw off my headband shaking with rage.
How dare the Hokage use those lives to try and justify what he did? How dare he actually try to defend his actions when he was directly responsible for each and every child… A new wave of nausea and disgust washed over me… directly responsible for each and every soldier…
I wanted out. I wanted out of this shitty world… I wanted out of this hell hole. Where the man who murdered every man woman and child on a battle field was hailed as a hero, where a man was considered innovative and peaceful for being better at the art of murder than his predecessors.
I wanted to vomit.
I did vomit.
It made me sick. The Fourth… I heard he was a good guy… Did he really murder Genin? An army of two-thousand had to have had some… Some of them children, some of them had families back home…
I have nothing against those who killed in war for their home and country. I have nothing against those who for the cause of liberty or self defense took the lives of other human beings because they loved their country or something worth saving more than anything. That I have no problem with and would even be proud to join them…
But as soon as a country lauds their slaughter over their enemy, honors the butcher as a hero and a saint, as soon as sending children to fight and die at the hands of murders for no reason…
Then I have problems. Big ones.
The earliest someone should even enlist is eighteen and even then… The Academy is only four years. Maybe five and most of that was boring school stuff. If they were allowed to live normally in schools and then choose to enlist at eighteen they could get done with basic training in several months and at most a year. Same as in my world… but here… they decide to allow children as young as six become frontlines. Kakashi Hatake, Naruto's sensei in the original, held the record for earliest graduate at that age followed by Itachi at eight.
I couldn't handle it anymore. I hated this place. Every time I think I see light at the end of the tunnel, every time I think 'Hey, maybe this place isn't so bad…' I am reminded of the corruption and sheer audacity of this world…
The Kage were monsters. The Villagers murderous and the whole system corrupt! No wonder Madara left! Everything he had been trying to stop just came to pass!
I began to laugh on the floor of my bathroom. I felt like I was going insane.
I was in hell.
This… the atrocities of the Third Great Shinobi war were going to happen again… weren't they? Millions of more people were going to die… and it was my job to stop it…
I passed out on the bathroom floor in a melodramatic heap. Then again, I was a theater kid so…
I was suddenly… somewhere else…
It was cold… so cold…
I was on my knees in the cold snow. The harsh, crisp air seared my lungs as a wave of frost splashed against my skin and sunk it's artic touch into my very bones.
I remember this place…
In my past life I lived near a lake. The cold dark blizzard that whipped around me seemed to confirm it. I was on the lake in the middle of winter. Slowly I turned and saw what I knew to be the only warmth in this area… a single ice fishing house… There used to be entire villages of ice-fishing houses on this lake. A single one alone on the ice was rare. I looked around and saw I was in the middle of one of these villages. The lights were all off… They looked abandoned…
I wandered in one despite my apprehension and shut the door. It was freezing out there! I was out of the wind, but everything was ice cold in here as well. There were five gallon buckets for seats, an augur for drilling and a small scoop to scoop out the ice that would form in the holes. Speaking of… there was only one. A big one… Normally there are three or four small holes and tiny rods dangling down each one.
"You don't belong here." A voice spoke. It seemed to shake the whole lake. And the ice beneath began to glow a burning horrible red. The water around the opening of the hole began to bubble like it was boiling.
"Who… who are you?!" I asked.
"Come closer so I may rend you…" A single blood red eye glared out from the whole. If I wasn't so cold already I would have said my blood turned to ice.
The Nine-tails… it was under the lake… I could see the brilliant red reflection of it moving under the ice.
This… This wasn't supposed to be how it was supposed to happen… It was supposed to be in a cage or something… Deep down in the hole was the Nine Tailed Fox. Underwater and under the lake… I ran out the ice house and back out into the blizzard. Except it wasn't snowing any longer. It was suddenly quiet. So quiet… I recognized this… the quiet of a world of winter.
Nothing moved. Nothing even breathed. Nothing existed for miles. Just the sound of my weight shifting under the snow and the panting of my breath.
"You cannot escape me here…" the Fox rumbled, and the lake groaned. I felt like I was in an earthquake. The snow covering the ice disappeared allowing me to see the Fox through the translucent, glass like ice.
It was enormous. Easily bigger than anything I could have ever imagined. I think I was roughly the size of it's hard, hate filled, slit pupil. It was smiling…
"So… I finally meet my captor…" The Fox spoke through the ice. It was terrifying. It was like I could hear him whispering directly into my ear.
"You're the Nine-tails…" I whisper.
"Yes… 'Papa Nuke' I believe you call me." The Fox said. "Tell me… why do you call me that?"
Unintentionally images of the 'future' flashed through my mind. Ones of the older Naruto fighting Orochimaru in his cloak form. Then images of Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The two atomic bombs dropped on Japan.
The Fox chortled. "My, my… what destruction you humans can cause… Almost as much as the Ten-tails… I doubt even I could destroy a city that large with my full power so… effortlessly. Not bad… Reincarnate…"
"I didn't ask for this." I said quietly but the ice creaked and groaned betraying my fear and unease.
"Neither did I, yet here we both stand." The Fox said softly. Seductively... "I have seen your thoughts and desires… I can make it all disappear…"
"You want me to let you out and kill everyone…" I asked with horror filled realization.
"Is that not what you desire?" The Fox asked making me flinch. "You desire this world to stop. You desire the village system to be upheaved. For children not to suffer and die for the cause of adults and the perverted sense of glory conquest brings… If you let me go… I can not only end your suffering but make the world suffer for what they have done. This much I can promise…"
"Yeah… but you'd kinda kill all my friends." I said staring at the fox shivering in the cold. "Sakura, Hinata, Shino… I bet they wouldn't appreciate it if their home was destroyed."
"But their lives are lies." The Fox countered. "They seek to uphold a system which can only hold them in captivity. So… what will you do Reincarnate?"
I stared at the fox for a long moment.
He was right. By allowing the system to fester I was hurting them. By not doing anything I was damning them. But if I undid the seal…
"Nah… sorry but dying sucks." I said cracking a smile. "Tell you what though. If you can wait until the natural span of my life I promise to let you go as my final act."
The Fox's eyes widen. "You dare…"
"Look. I know you are like immortal and I know it sucks being trapped in there. I get it. I once got locked in a bathroom without toilet paper for several hours until a buddy of mine rescued me. I am asking if you can wait just a little longer. You've seen my memories of Gaara right? Do you really wanna go through that?" I asked seriously replaying the memory of Shukaku getting forcibly ripped out of Gaara.
It wasn't balls. It wasn't bravery. I, at that moment, was asking out of pure curiosity. He had every right to be pissed as hell. I would be too. I think he felt that.
"Feh. Humans… always the same." The Fox snarled. "You promise this and promise that, but you always enslave and destroy."
"Tell me how to release you." I said. "I swear that I will do it when I am dying. I am a ninja. I am probably going to die before I hit twenty… All I ask and all I can give you is a chance right before I die. You will have a shot to escape and run away. I hate this world and if I am dying trying to fight an enemy it is probably in my nature to give them one last 'Screw You!' before I keel over. So you will probably only have to wait about five or six years? Maybe? I am also going to be going after that Akatsuki group and they are coming after me. I am saying it is in both our best interests to stay as we are. However there will be times I will need your help."
"And why should I accept your deal? Why should I help you!?" The Fox roared. "Let me get one thing straight brat. I owe you nothing! Don't come asking me for my chakra like I am a damn milk cow! I am the Nine Tailed Demon Fox! You think I am in need of your assistance!?"
"Yeah. 'Cause your trapped." I said bluntly, maybe a little nervously. Big f-ing fox under the ice and just staring at me is a good way to unnerve me… "I mean no disrespect I am just trying to understand, but wouldn't it be better to just sit tight for a bit and supply me with chakra every now and again? Can't you like, kill me from the inside out with your chakra?"
The Fox seemed to consider it.
"You could probably erode the seal by supplying me with the chakra I need… I will be fighting people at least on par with the Sanin and the Hokage." I continued. "It will take a lot of chakra…"
"Their chakra is nothing compared to mine." The Fox said with a sneer. "A mere drop is enough to defeat them all!"
"Then I will make you a deal." I said and watched as the Fox said looking with interest. "I will call upon your chakra and every time I do I will expect to die. You can push as much chakra through me as you can and try to break open the seal. You will be free with your captor dead and free to destroy all our enemies like the Akatsuki."
"And pray tell, why I shouldn't just do that now?" The Fox scowled.
I gulped.
Yes, brain! Tell the giant ass fox nuke why it shouldn't just kill us now! Stupid!
The ice began to crack beneath me but didn't break as the Fox pressed against the weakening resolve made manifest.
"Because the Hokage can seal me up if you try to break out." I said weakly. "You also know that there are guys like Yamato that can bind your power should I attempt to free you. And if you do get out you will be hunted by the Akatsuki. And for some reason I don't think Itachi Uchiha is their strongest guy…"
The Fox was silent, and I was sweating bullets. I was risking everything on a hunch. The Fox glared.
"In the Uzumaki clan ruins in the catacombs deep beneath the earth is a mask. A mask with this face." The Fox said softly. The ice changed to form the face of a smiling demon. "I will be trying to break out of this seal every time you call upon me but if I don't succeed by the time you reach twenty find this mask, put it on your face, and slit your stomach open. This should undo the seal. Deal?"
I nodded slowly. In seven years I would commit suicide… A deal with the devil.
"Deal." I said softly and the world faded to white.
I woke up on the floor of my bathroom disoriented and the foul acidic stench of my own vomit filled my nostrils. I gaged and nearly threw up again… Shit…
I washed my face off and tried to get as much of that barf shit outta my nose as possible. When I look up at the mirror… Well…
Words echo in my mind.
"This is the mark of your promise." The Fox whispered. "Never forget your days are numbered… Reincarnate."
My hair… Soft golden locks were gone… Now were still spiky just… Red…
Shit… Now I'm a Ginger! Dammit Fox! Why would you mess with perfection!? Now I look like someone who stepped out of some anime convention! I look like freakin Shiro Emmia!
Grumbling as I realized that it wouldn't come off or change I just decided to forget about it and find out where Tenten put my groceries.
I noticed the sunset. I must have been out for some number of hours-
Shit! My fried chicken!
Like I said earlier, I was minding my own business eating a pulled pork sandwich the next day after meeting Papa Nuke. Bastard Fox changed my natural hair color and I was debating on dying it when I realized nobody recognized me without the blonde hair… so I transformed to only remove the whiskers and for the first time in my life I bought myself a pulled pork curry bun sandwich and just walked through Konoha.
It was a beautiful day outside. I ate my lunch under a tree I found in a training field and just watched the sunlight stream through the trees. The heat wasn't so bad, and the dappled light and light breeze made for a perfect nap location… Nap time she comes…
"BWAHAHAHA! Bow down bitches! I, the great Konohamaru! Lord of Terror! Has finally stolen the scroll of infinite power!" The boy ironically named 'Leaf Boy' said. Well… crowed. I was on the other side of the tree trying to figure out what was going on.
The kid greedily opened the scroll and began unfurling it and reading it with exclamations of 'I see!' and 'Truly!'. Eventually he found one that he wanted to try and flipped through the hand signs.
"Ninja Art! Impu- Gggkkhgh…" the boy fell over. Wondering if the kid was alright I wandered over and nudged him with my foot.
"Hey, kid… You okay?" I asked hesitantly.
Chakra exhaustion was no joke. When he didn't respond I checked his vitals like a responsible adult and found he was fine.
"Knocked himself out." I said. "Better check the jutsu he was trying to preform to see if there are any side effects…"
Well, that was the reason I gave out loud. Curiosity had me aching to check the scroll the kid had been reading from. The little bastard was going off about how he stole it so I figured I would make him return the scroll to the proper owner after lecturing the kid… about…
Whoa… this… this jutsu in the scroll was super advanced. Impure World Reincarnation? What the hell was that? I didn't even get half of what the scroll was talking about, so I moved on and became progressively more and more creeped out with each entry as I moved over each one with a morbid curiosity.
"Reincarnation jutsu… huh… gives the user the ability to permanently settle into someone's body? That seems familiar…" I mutter skimming over it. I have no idea what this thing is talking about and I am and math and science major. This shit is more about metaphysical yin yang stuff… If I wanted that, I would have found a book on Feng Shui… Next!
"Flying Thunder God…" I said reading it and my face lights up as I recognize some of this math. "Huh? Just a seal to triangulate distance, rate, and time but for subspace markers? Oh! Looks like you reverse summon yourself into another dimension and then use the reciprocal seal to summon yourself back. But… there's a part missing… huh… it is easier to transfer energy…"
After a moment's contemplation I smirked. "Nah! Let's go back to the beginning!"
It took a little finagling with the big ass scroll, but I found one I recognized.
"Multi-Shadow Clone Jutsu…" I whispered touching the scroll gently.
Now lemme put a hypothetical to ya.
If you found a notebook, scroll, pdf, or whatever and it showed you how to do something impossible, like Goku's Kamehameha… Even if it seemed like it would never work… would you try it? I read over the description however and I didn't like what I saw.
"Splits the soul into equal parts… Can be used in combination with the Reaper Death Seal? Wait… isn't that…" I muttered but then a thought occurs.
What… kind of experimentation was required to create a jutsu like this?
…
…
…
HOLY SHIT SHADOW CLONES ARE HORCRUXES!
I am honestly at a loss for words. The Shadow Clone jutsu literally rips out a piece of your soul and then sticks it in a meat bag of, you guessed it, shadows. The jutsu requires you to spilt your soul… Granted you use chakra rather than murder to split your soul and it comes back to you but… your soul man… As a Reincarnate I have absolutely no idea what that would do to me… better play it safe…
I flipped through it as Konohamaru slept off his dirt nap. He kept muttering shit like 'boobies…' or 'I am the dark lord ladies…'
The kid was some sort of psycho pervert hell bent on world domination.
…
I can dig it.
Some of this shit… it honestly disgusts me.
Ghost Transformation can insert your soul into someone and melt their body from the inside out... Last user: Dan Kato… Hyuuga family… curse mark… my hands trembled as I read what Hinata's family did to their own members. Insect Assimilation… oh God… what have they done? Infants… being infested with insects… fifty-fifty survival rate… What?
Then I found one that made my heart stop cold.
"Reaper Death Seal…" I whispered. "Calls down the spirit of the Death God to come devour the soul of whomever the target picks… then the soul of the… both souls are trapped in eternal torment fighting in the belly of the Reaper…"
I stared at the scroll for the first time wanting nothing to do with it… Why? Why would someone kill themselves to send both themselves and another down to hell? And… this one was marked…
Reaper Death Seal of the Uzumaki Clan.
"Feh. Gingers really do steal souls…" I chuckled morbidly. "Well… Konoha… I have seen your sins… Lets see what else you have…"
It was… enlightening… to say the least. Izanami and Izanagi were cool techniques from the Uchiha clan… but their use in eye taking… ripping out their brothers eyes are messed up. The Eternal Mangekyo Sharingan and the Mangekyo Sharingan were also listed and… just…
I wanted to hurl again. What you had to do to gain that power… murder your best friend and then if your blood brother murdered his best friend too you fight each other to the death so you can rip out your brothers eyes and implant them to yourself… And for what? Power?
"If not power then what do you desire?" a voice whispered in my head. Nine-tails…
I looked around. I was back in my mindscape but with the scroll there as well. The Nine-tails was still trapped under ice and his tails thrashed eagerly awaiting my answer.
I stared at the scroll and at my hands. "No… I didn't really want to be powerful… I'd like to be less afraid but if this was the cost for power in this world… I know it's cliché but what I really want is freedom. To run away. To escape. I… I'm not Naruto. I know I have said it before but I just… I just want to be left alone."
"You want them to fear you." Nine-tails whispered. "You want them to be afraid like you were afraid. You want them to suffer."
I laugh. Really laugh. I can feel the Nine-tails' confusion and irritation and that makes me chuckle more.
"Sorry, sorry! I just… you were doing the whole 'I can give you anything' schtick and I couldn't help but… Sorry… haha… I just…" I snickered. "I know I'm an evil asshole. You don't need to 'tempt' me. I accept that deep down, some parts of me are truly evil. The whole Id thing. Fruedian psychology. The inner animal. I get it. What I want mister 'temptress' is this… Freedom. But!" I continued when I felt the Nine-tails' power well up. "I also don't want to die! Not quite at that 'call of the void' bit… What I want is to fulfill my contract to the best of my ability and hopefully have a chance to reproduce in a way that is totally not creepy!"
The Fox was stunned silent.
"Honestly since I turned thirteen that had been on my mind. Half your age plus seven work when the 'legal' age of consent was twelve? Yet another reason why the elemental nations should burn... fricken lolicons and hentai logic… Sorry y'all but I prefer girls that actually have some maturity… mid-thirties please! Big boobs are always a plus, but I don't want none unless she's got buns son! And blondes, can't forget that… and the most important part… is she… ya know… nice? I am a believer of the hotness to craziness ratio scale. The hotter the more psycho. Just sayin. Rule one shall always be do not stick your dick in crazy... But I also realize I am in an anime and crazy is also really, really hot… so… Maybe a blonde tsundere with a spank-able ass and a nice rack who's sweet on me? If you can find me a way that I won't let Naruto die a virgin in a way that is totally not creepy as detailed in the criteria above I will let you out right now!
"But that is just what I want, want! I want a lot of things you Fantastic Mr. Fox! But what I want is always gonna be trumped why what I need, and I don't need that! I am a perverted, petty, sad, angry, little man trapped in the body of a teenager going through puberty! You think your situation is bad! HA! You only need to sit pretty and wait! I have to live dammit! I have to lie, cheat, steal, and kill in order to survive! I have had to re-learn how to walk! I have had my ass wiped for me and was bottle fed for two years! ALSO! Do you have any idea how infuriating the academy was?! If I have to hear one more little song or memorization poem I am going to scream! People honestly don't give me enough credit for not going full psychopath and murdering them all in their sleep!"
I suddenly got quiet… really quiet.
"But then I met people that saved me from insanity. Hinata, Shino, Kiba, Sakura… Hell even Sasuke." I said softly. Suddenly my eyes burned, and I glared at the fox. "I only agreed to our contract because like them I thought I can help you. Giving me some kind of goal or purpose. I will not let you out willingly until the promised time. I am willing to let you try to break out early all you want but I want to make something clear. When you fail, because yes, you will fail. If you hurt one of my friends I will really be tempted to end our contract."
The Fox ROARED!
"WE HAD A DEAL!" The Fox bellowed threatening to smash the ice into a million pieces as his anger seeped like red jello between the cracks.
"Yes, you great furry bastard! And we are still good on that deal! Just lemme live a little before letting you out dammit!" I roared over him. "Please… I just want to… shit…"
I was crying… dammit why now. My mindscape began to snow softly. Cold, frozen tears finally falling. The Fox was glaring, snarling but otherwise silent.
"I just want… I want to…" I sniffed. "I'll let you out okay… just let me have this. Let me see Sakura's dream come true, her little family she's gonna have with Sasuke. Let me see her making that work. Let Hinata have a nice home life or move out and gain some confidence… Let me see Shino finally get a girlfriend or boyfriend I don't judge… Just… I… I died too soon last time… and here everything is really shitty. Can I please… please can I have till I'm twenty? Please?"
The Fox stared at me looking uncomfortable.
"For me to be free I would have to crush your life… very well. I will allow this on one condition." The Fox said. "I have been reviewing your memories of the future past. Do you remember the one called Tobi?"
I blinked, tears still in my eyes.
"Tobi…" I repeated before brightening. "Yeah! I loved that guy! He was freaking hilarious and-"
"He is the one who murdered Naruto parents and set me loose on the village." The Fox said.
I… blinked?
"But… just… wha-?" I stuttered trying to comprehend… just… what? Tobi was the silly one that made the show brighter... how was he... just... huh?!
"He is a monster. Why do you think he is in the Akatsuki? He was your 'father's' student, an Uchiha consumed by his hatred for the village for letting his mate die." The Fox said. "I want you to murder him..."
I stared at the monster beneath the ice.
"If you murder him I will allow you until you reach a hundred." The Fox said. "I hate him for putting me into place for that blonde bastard to seal me away. I hate him because he is probably the one that is trying to rip us out of the Jinchuriki and place us into that statue…"
The Nine-tailed fox, strongest Bijuu in existence shivered in fear.
"But if you murder him I will wait for you to see all of these things come to pass… " The Fox said grinning ferally. "What do you say? Deal?"
I stared at the ice between me and the fox. Red orange tinted water lapped up on my shoes. The winds whipped wildly around me.
Could I murder someone? Could I sit back and let this happen? If you had to kill someone for your life and the lives of those you care about… would you do it? He was probably super strong if he was part of the Akatsuki…
If you had to give your life… or murder someone… to stop someone from doing something evil, truly evil, would you do it?
Sakura laying on the ground, eyes cold, glassy, and hollow. Never to brighten up when she finds out something new. Never to roll those eyes when I say something stupid.
I would.
Hinata, branded with one of those infernal marks. Her soft crooked little smile never to be seen again as she becomes a slave to her own family.
I would.
Shino, never being able to relate to anyone losing himself in grief and grudges against the people who were his comrades because no one would accept him.
I would.
Sasuke, his eyes gouged out by Itachi and body taken over by Orochimaru. Worse yet becoming a bitter and hate filled young man and dying on the way.
I would.
An eerie calm fell over me. I could see my face superimposed on the glass surface of the ice. My eyes matched with The Fox's.
"Deal."
I woke up with a groggy head. Konohamaru was standing over me looking nervous. I glanced up at him and watched as he flinched.
I got up clutching my head. Ow…
'To help you kill the man, I offer my power. My blessing to the one who is my Avenger.' The Fox whispered. 'I give you the power to make your dreams come true, and your nightmares reality… I am not your friend… I am not your ally… This is not me submitting just fulfilling my end of the bargain… Beware you do not mistake my gift for 'kindness'."
"Very well… Partner… what shall we do now?" I said aloud and that would be my… last mistake.
"I…did it… I summoned a daemon from the outer realm!" Konohamaru said dancing and crowing before smiling sinisterly at me. "Hear me great one! I am your Master! Obey me and you will part in my kingdom!"
I blinked.
"Hey kid I think-"
"Now that I have a daedric prince on my side I can become Hokage!" Konohamaru said piggy eyes smiling evilly. "I will become a dark lord that shall know no limits! This calls for a new name! I am no longer Konohamaru! 'Leaf boy' is pathetic! You my dark underling, may call me Stormageddon!"
I say Stormaggedon because that is the best translation. What he wanted me to call him is 'Sekai no Owari (End of the World) Shippuden (Storm/hurricane)'. So… Storm-armageddon… Stormageddon, Dark Lord of Terror… oh dear…
"O…Kay? Um-" I said face palming. What was with my life?
"I shall conquer the World! I shall be known throughout all nations as Stormageddon!" Konohamaru cackled. "Now! My Dark Underling! I command thee as thy master- Oh shit! It's Ebisu sensei! Um! Defend thy dark sire and defeat him!"
"Wait what?" I said turning around. There, standing in a tree was a man wearing black shades and dark clothing. He looked like the stuffy sort but… He glared like I wasn't even allowed to exist.
"So… You've unlocked your dark power have you?" The man said looking ready to attack me. "You dare steal the forbidden scroll… search it's dark contents and kidnap the Hokage's grandson?"
Konohamaru had puffed up his chest in pride until the last part.
"What?! NO! I summoned him from the dark realm to do my bidding!" Konohamaru said stamping his foot. "He's going to kill gramps for me so I can take the Hokage's spot!"
"Wait what!?" I yelped. I may not be the smartest crayon in the box but even I know you don't threaten the life of the military dictator!
"I see that the monster has put you under a Genjutsu." Ebisu said glaring at me with renewed hatred. "If I kill him the Genjutsu shall fade."
He sprung towards me and I did the first thing that came to my mind.
"Scary Jutsu!" I said transforming.
Ebisu jumped back ready to take on this new threat and-
A black tail swiped at him, Ebisu dodging out of reflex. Ebisu had heard of this jutsu from Iruka. It was just an illusion. Nothing to fear.
Before him was the mighty Xenomorph standing roughly nine feet tall and black leathery skin dripped with a slimy sheen. It charged and transformed again. Ebisu was impressed, or at least he might be if it wasn't the monster attacking his student! Changing transformations was always difficult. Even one as skilled as he had difficulty-
A hard punch slammed into his jaw. Before him was Bane from The Batman series. Not the movie Bane but the one from the comics. Suddenly Ebisu was put into a headlock. The boy's strength was insane! Did he unleash the powers of the Nine-tails?
Ebisu however knew the weakness to every transformation! A sharp stab from a kunai would break the concentration of the user and cause them to transform back! He was brilliant for coming up with this under pressure! He was truly worthy of teaching the Hokage's grandson. Ebisu effortlessly stabbed the monster in the leg and heard him roar but… what?
Blood… real… blood… dripped down his kunai yet the massive arms refused to let him go. Ebisu trembled as he realized he had just-
The boy grew bigger somehow transforming even further. Bane became a creature he had never seen before. It roared loudly and no amount of kunai or shuriken stopped it's approach. He tried to release himself from the Genjutsu, but it wouldn't work! How? Why? Just…
Ebisu was slammed into a tree by a tremendous claw. The last thing he saw was the monster transforming back and becoming woozy.
Shit! I didn't mean to rough him up that bad! Knew using the Rancor from Star Wars was a bad idea! Thankfully it looked like I just knocked him out.
The Nine-tails gift… It turns my illusions physical. Not like, 'Oh the illusion is just so good the body thinks it's real' but-
"If you Transform you can make yourself whatever you like, if you Clone yourself it will be physical, and if you use Genjutsu those Genjutsu can kill. How many times do I have to explain it?" The Fox said.
"But that doesn't make any sense!" I yelped. "Where did all that mass come from! And- Motherfu- why does it hurt if I take damage!?"
I still had the wound from where that bitch stabbed me! The Fox sighed.
"Yin Chakra adds substance to things. Yang Chakra gives life to substance. You are Yin release and I am Yang. Together we create all things." The Fox said cryptically. "Basically you can add your chakra and make illusions more physical giving it form and then I make them real by breathing life into them. It's how Tailed beasts are chakra constructs and still physical. Yin and Yang. Got it?"
"Kinda." I said checking Ebisu's vitals. He was fine just…
"Truly you are a good dark underling. Come my Daedric Prince. We have much we need to discuss." Konohamaru said. He then turned to Ebisu and then back to me. "You have my gratitude for keeping him alive."
"Look kid I-"
"STORMAGEDDON!" Konohamaru roared over me. "Insulant welp! Either address me as such or by master! I shall not be called a child!"
I blinked.
"Look I-"
"KONOHAMARU!" A voice roaring with feminine fury screeched. Konohamaru flinched.
"You can handle her too right?!" Konohamaru squeaked and hid behind me.
"KONOHAMARU GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE! MOMMY IS VERY ANGRY!"
I gave him my most pitying look.
"You're on your own kid."
A/N: A lot to unpack this chapter but... yes, I gave Naruto a super power that he never had! Can cross that off my Naruto super power bucket list. As for why the Fox gave him that power… you'll see.
Also Important: Working on a RWBY story so not gonna be updating this one up too often but hopefully enough people actually still wanna read it? Got a lot of big plans but these chapters are a doozy to write. Peace y'all!
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