Takes Place After Wrecked
I suck at editing, and guess what, these charcters are "note" mine. Oh well.
This show *not* is mine, it's Joss's!
Reviews: Can live with 'em, can't live without 'em. It's my tragic flaw.

Watching You

It had been a two days since the incident at the Bronze and Buffy had not seen Spike. Of course she hadn't stopped by his crypt. She couldn't. If she went there, and it was empty, it meant he was really gone. On the other hand, if she didn't go she could believe anything she wanted. It was nighttime so Buffy figured she should go out and patrol. Buffy called up to Dawn to tell her she was leaving, but then remebered she had went to Janice's house.

Buffy grabbed her coat and a stake and headed out the door. She stepped out onto her porch and took in a deep breath. She just stood there for a moment in the cool night air. Then she realized there was something beneath her foot. Lifting it up, she saw a cigarette butt lying there. Hoping against hope that Spike had been there, and still was she called out his name. Nobody answer. Nothing even moved. Suddenly she felt more horrible then she ever had about the whole Spike situation.

Some people have said that hope causes more sadness then the complete lack of it, but Buffy had never believed it until then. It felt like being lifted, only to be dropped from a further up hight. Thinking about it she probably felt this way when Angel's soul was restored, only for her to kill him, but she hadn't thought about it then.

Buffy really missed Spike, and felt worse knowing she caused him to leave, directly. She flat out told him to go away and never come back. But now she wished he would- come back, not go away. 'Or yes, go away. It's good Spike's gone, much better.' Buffy tried in vain to convince herself she didn't miss Spike. Inside she knew she did. The one thing you can't trick is your emotions, and Buffy's were telling her she loved him.

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A small television moniter was sitting atop a desk that was empty except for a few more screens. Each screen displayed a differant scene. On one of the tvs Anya could be seen moving around the magic box cleaning up the shelves. She inspected various items, and raised a few of their prices. When she was finished she walked over to a bookshelf and picked up a spell book. She brought it over to the table and opened it up. She took a deep breath, like she was preparing to read on of them aloud. Her lips moved as if she was speaking, then she pulled out her wedding magizine, closed the book and put it back on the shelf.

Xander walked into view. Anya's lips moved some more and Xander opened up to a certain page in the bridal magizine as if Anya had told him to. He crinkled his nose in digust, then a figure walked over to the moniters and turned them all off.

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Buffy was through with patrol so she walked back to her house. As she was walking up the path to her home, she felt a presense. She turned around, but didn't see anyone there. She felt something thought, it felt like

"Spike?" Buffy wispered into the night not wanting to get her hopes up this time.

"Caught me love." Spike said stepping out of the shadows "Now before you get all huffy with me, let me explain myself." He said. Buffy nodded so Spike continued "I started packing up my things and I thought 'where am I going to go?' and I realized I had no idea. Then I realized I didn't *want* to go. Even if you wouldn't look at me, I'd still have the little bit, and that's more then I got anywhere else in the world. So..." Spike took an unnecassary breath and began to explain himself more but was interupted by Buffy lips crushing his.

"It doesn't matter Spike. As long as your going to stay..." Buffy told him after they pulled apart.

"I am." Spike replied still somewhat shocked. Then he realized what was going on. He took a deep shaky breath then, void of emotion, spoke to Buffy. "You can't keep doing this. It's going to kill me. I know tomorrow your going to tell me I disgust you. Don't worry Buffy, I'm never going to leave you, you don't have to play games with me." He finished a little softer.

Buffy took a step toward him "That's not it. At all. You know the saying 'You never know what you have until you lose it'? Or in my case, thought you lost it? Well, I didn't know what I had until you were 'gone'." Buffy said making little air quotes for the word 'gone'. "I have a friend, an confidant, a partner, I have you." She said meaningfully "I love you."

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