Dee Hircus was a very busy woman. She didn't become the most successful goat farmer in the American Great Plains by being a slouch, you know.
But success demanded effort. And every morning she felt the effects of her effort. The alarm clock at her bedside mocked her weary body. It's 6:00, you withered corpse. It beeped. 6:00. Get up.
Dee just stared at the infernal machine. She used to be able to shut it off instantly. On some days she would straight up just deck the fucker. But over the years, her strength had waned. Now all she could do was curl up in the bed and wait for her body to gather the energy needed to throw out only a measly little slap, all the while Dee had actually gone through 8 alarm clocks. Number 9 however, was a cheeky cunt. It had come in at just the right time. And it damn knew it too. It just stood there, catcalling a force of deestruction that had been tamed by time.
6:04. The alarm clock buzzed out. I can do this all day. Just look at you, you haven't even moved. I am the master. I decide when you rise. So come on you filthy cretin, your master is wait-
SMOCK! The alarm clock had been silenced, sent to the depths of irrelevancy for one more day.
Dee looked down at her savior. A small, gray-white ferret looked back up at her and smiled, saying good morning in Dookanese.
"Shit. That thing is annoying, isn't it?" A voice whispered in her ear.
"I agree." Dee clutched her pillow tighter. "Ferrets need to be genocided. Immediately."
"I'll keep that in mind the next time the clock is kicking you ass." The voice responded. "So, tomorrow."
The ferret jumped up and scampered into the arms Ferret, Dee's savior of the day. "Morning gorgeous." She gave Dee a kiss on the cheek."
"I thought we agreed that the ferrets would stay on your side of the bed." Dee said. "Every time I smell even a little like goat cheese they like to bite my ass off."
"Oh Dee, you can't blame my ferrets for being a little curious." Ferret leaned in. "There's nothing more I love than a bite of you." Softly as she could, Ferret bit down on Dee's neck.
Dee gave a little cry. Oh boy. If you gave Ferret an inch, you could expect the mile not far behind.
Ferret grabbed Dee's waist, fingers dancing along the tank top. "Why haven't you killed this one like you killed 8?" Ferret asked. "8 was my favorite. It had stripes and those itty bitty polka dots that we so cute, and it was in various shades of blue, to appease everybody! It was perfect."
"7 was the best one," Dee responded. "It was my limited edition Criminal Minds clock. And what happened to it? You had your ferrets jump off of the walls and one of them crushed my clock."
"Can we both agree that 9 is the worst one? Come one, it's got paisley on it."
"I'll agree with that. I'd like nothing more than to have that to punch that thing's brains in Foyet-style."
"Then why do we still have 9?" Ferret asked.
"9 is saying because you need to suffer for 7's murder," Dee responded. "If the clocks were animals, 7 would have swallowed 9 whole."
"So it's confirmed that 7 8 9." Ferret giggled.
Dee groaned. "Why? Why would you do that?"
"You set it up for me. You have no one to blame but yourself."
"Come on Ferret. I'm tired. And I have to go to work," Dee pleaded.
"If you're tired, then stay," Ferret said.
"But I really need to get up." Dee tried to break free.
"Stay." Ferret pinned her back down to the bed.
Dee turned around to face her captive. "Ferret..."
Ferret grabbed the back of Dee's neck and pulled her in, embracing her love with a passionate kiss. Dee worked herself too hard, but she would never admit it. Sometimes Ferret needed to be a bit forceful with Dee. Not that Ferret minded. She loved a good chase, but a chase was all about the reward. Eventually, Ferret pulled away, the both of them panting. Ferret pinned Dee to the bed and got on top of her, looking into Dee's beautiful eyes. Ferret could see the lust, the excitement, but also the conflict. Dee would need a little more convincing. With a quick glance Ferret looked at the clock. 6:10.
"You still have time." Ferret said, pulling up Dee's tank top. "I'm sure Ashes and Taff can hold down the fort until you arrive."
"I still don't want to be late," Dee said. "A good boss sets an example for her workers."
"It's fine, you have time." Ferret bent over and kissed Dee's naval, before dragging her tongue across her lover's body. "10 minutes." She crawled forward and gave Dee another kiss on the lips.
"10 minutes," Dee responded back.