As I Expected; My Teen Ballin' Rom-Com is Wrong.
Chapter 1
The Job, the Ball, and the Goddess
Author's useless babbling:
So, the previous chapter was a bit messy, granted it was around 12 am when I was writing that one. It was also a simple origin to this Hachiman we have now!
I will leave some notes in the afterword to help with any bball jargon and stuff that I throw out there! So, without further ado, here is chapter 1!
As always, read, review, enjoy!
*Da-chan out*
Winter break is coming. Just another sem and I'm out of this hell hole of a school. As I expected, my non-existent social life seemed to get worse (if that's even possible) after that fiasco of futility. Orimoto has stopped talking to me, heck, not that she talked to me much. And well, yadda this and yadda that. But still, I need to find a way to play basketball. It's too late to join the basketball club now, and frankly, I suck. No one would recruit me even if they had a gun to their heads. Maybe I could just self-train? That's how I managed to be any good with tennis. It shouldn't be that hard, right? Basketball is a pretty big sport, especially in America, and everyone knows how much YouTube content America churns out. Heh, that's right. All I need is the internet, a ball, and a yard. Two of those things I happen to already possess. Now where can I get a cheap but durable ball?
"Hikigaya, are you listening?" growled his sensei. He was in science class right now, and he couldn't care less about it. He was too busy formulating a grand master plan in order to actually get started with basketball. And he knew his limits very well. So he had to be creative and independent. However, being creative and independent is not what his sensei wanted him to be right now.
"Why don't you get up here and solve this physics equation for us. That ought to wake you up."
Great, now Bitsu-sensei is being a fuss. But, not much I can do. Now, hmmm… how do you solve this equation again? Shit, I should've listened even just a bit earlier. Shiiiiit I'm gonna make an even bigger fool of myself. Universe! You sass-filled ass!
"Hikigaya, what's taking so long? Weren't listening were you, fine, get back to your se—"
"23."
Crap, I said that out loud, goodness. I was just trying to churn up random numbers to at least put an answer up. And seriously? 23? I had to use Michael Jordan's jersey number eh? But, it's also Lebron James', and Draymond Green's. Gosh everyone loves that number too much. Me included.
Of course, after that revelation a few months ago, Hachiman has sacrificed some of his time with Vita-chan to go watch some more basketball. For hours at a time, he'd be staring at his computer monitor, or his phone, or the TV screen. He couldn't help it. He was mesmerized. He was simply stunned. I mean, humungous people running around doing some acrobatics with an orange ball. It couldn't have been any sillier, but it wasn't any less beautiful.
Michael Jordan. Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. Wilt Chamberlain. Kobe Bryant. Shaquille O'Neal. Lebron James. James Harden. Kevin Durant. Russell Westbrook.
Names just kept etching themselves into his memory.
He studied them, studied them as if they were a subject at school. He watched their moves, he watched their games. He was with them in their highs and lows. He felt like he was with them in their journey to greatness. He even memorized useless trivia, and of course, their jersey numbers.
He may not look like it, but Hachiman can be thorough and studious when he wants to be.
"Woah, I dunno how you did that, probably just a wild guess, but it's correct. You may sit down now Hikigaya."
"Thank you sensei."
Good. She didn't ask me to explain how I got it, must be some pity. Don't look down on me fool! I'll break your ankles! Not that I can even dribble a ball properly. But someday I will! Watch me!
Hachiman once again immersed himself in his thoughts as the lesson dragged on.
It wasn't long before the bell rang for dismissal, and the students started pouring out of the gates. Hachiman wasted no time and started browsing his phone for nearby sports shops to visit. He needed a ball, and he's saved enough to afford even a mildly expensive one.
Hmmm, Sakuragi's Sports Shop? Let's see…! What are these prices! Are you kidding me?! Where is it? Just a station away?! How did I miss this place? Maybe the universe is trying to make up for all its shit. I gotta go there ASAP.
I better send a text to Komachi that I'm going to a sports shop.
Komachi, I'm going to this sports shop I found, it's nearby and has cheap prices, I think this is the one! I'll be home a bit late though, please leave some dinner for me. I'll buy you some ice cream on the way home. That'd earn me a ton of points, right?
Sent. Now I just need to get to the place.
"Heheheheheh," Hachiman giggled under his breath, this earned him scared looks from males and females alike. He didn't really care much, he had places to be.
Activating one of his 108 loner skills: Stealth Hikki; he slipped past the crowd and went on his way to the sports shop of his dreams.
After a short and uneventful train ride and a 5 minute jog (yes, he was that fired up), Hachiman has made it to the store.
The exterior was nothing special. It had glass panes that looked worn down, and the shelves are leaning at angles that tell you how tired they are. It was a dim shop, with very little lighting. It had a weathered sign saying "Sakuragi's Sports Shop". At least with that Hachiman knew he's in the right place. But one thing caught his attention.
Now hiring part time workers! 3 days a week schedule, minimum wage! Students welcome to apply!
There were two things as attractive as that, an NBA cheerleader, and a porn star. And only this one was available for him to take.
So ignoring the sad state of the store, Hachiman opened the door, and what greeted him was the third thing as attractive as the offer.
There at the counter was a red-headed woman, she was tall, probably a full head taller than him, but she had a youthful face. She was undeniably Japanese, so she probably has her hair dyed. Her tall stature was complemented by her fitness. You could basically trace the toned muscles on her legs through those tight gray jogging pants she was wearing. Behind and below her hips were pillows of flesh that looked soft, but also looked like they could squeeze a grapefruit. She was wearing a pink and black cropped top sports bra, and you can see the lines of her abdominal muscles tracing to a place that would have him killed if he looked too long at. Her arms were thin like a typical girl's, but they're ripped, and they felt solidly built. She also had a toned neck, without a shred of fat on the chin area, and her shoulders had a beautiful, sculpted line pointing to, and down to her cleavage. Speaking of cleavage, she had breasts that look like they're made of muscle and not fat. They were not too big, and not too small, perfect for her height. They had an immaculate shape, no doubt the effect of exercise. The girl in front of him looked like a model, and at the same time, an athlete. And then, he finally snapped out of his trance and looked her in the eye, and he was stunned.
She was a medusa, but her power could only work on a certain body part of men, and he surely is feeling like a stone right about now.
W-what the heck?! What is up with this girl? She's too beautiful to be real, and she's smiling like she won the championship or something. Crap, she's dangerous, if I act like a hormonal raged teen, I'll have my head crushed by those toned, perfectly shaped… thighs…
"Ehem, is there something you want sir?" said the girl in a voice that tickled the ears of men, and women.
"Ahh y-yes, I saw this shop online and I was surprised by the prices, I would also like to inquire about the offer placed outside." Hachiman managed to stammer. Now that he thought about it, there weren't any other customers in this shop, and yet they were hiring. Just what is up with this shop? And what is up with this girl?
"Ohh! That's just brilliant! We've been in need of a helping hand in this place. You see, we're actually a big company based in Kanagawa, but we've gone online and by contract mostly now, we usually supply schools, and deliver goods directly, but my father, the owner, decided to open up shop here in Chiba, and if you're thinking why is the place so shabby, it's because it hasn't been fully renovated yet into a proper sports goods outlet. Right now we are using this place as a storage area, and as a delivery point here in Chiba, and we needed more hands on deck. And I know this is late because I drabbled on, but my name is Sakuragi Haru, and I'm a first year high school student. I'm managing this shop while it's still trying to stand on its two feet." Now it all made sense. It made sense that such a big company that supplied schools directly could offer such cheap prices, and how dilapidated this store was. Hachiman silently mused in understanding as he took in the situation.
"Ohh, s-so does that mean I'm hired? And also, do you have a stock of the Molten GG7X basketball? Its starting price is 4500 yen, but here it's on sale for just 3000 yen."
"Well, we'll have to finalize the details for a bit for that, and then I'll have to interview you, but that won't take too long. As for the ball, yes, we do have it in stock, and yes, it's 30% cheaper than the usual. If you manage to get hired, we can give it to you for free, company incentive."
Hachiman has now encountered 3 beautiful things today: a job opportunity, a goddess, and a cheap or possibly free basketball. He was worried that he's using up all the luck that he'll get at the New Year.
"Well, let's get started with the application, here's the form, you just need to fill it up and sign here, here, and here."
"Um, yeah, thanks."
"After that, come with me to the manager's office, and let's talk about some things." Hachiman blushed at that. She couldn't have chosen a more awkward wording for a job interview, not to mention she's still in sports gear, and by the looks of it, she just came from an athletic activity and is still rather sweaty.
Youth is all a lie, filled with pretentious, superficial relationships, worshipping those who are "in", and hating those who are "out". But when you simplify it to a ball, a court, a hoop, and a dream, it all starts making sense. In a world where putting the ball in the hoop is the goal, dreams may be betrayed, but lies will never be told.
Hachiman thought as he passed his application form to Haru, who then signaled for him to come with her to the manager's office.
He did not forget to send a text to Komachi informing her of what he'll be doing, and that he'll be home even later than he previously stated.
How was that for the first chapter? And yes, Sakuragi Haru is Hanamichi's daughter with whoever you want the mother to be . This will not be a crossover because she's an OC that's just loosely tied to Slam Dunk, this is more of an allegory to the series.
As for the bball jargon, since Hachiman is also a bball newbie, I'm thinking of letting the reader learn with him, making it even more immersive to those that know and those that don't.
See you in the next chapter!