A/N: for my friend rogue, who asked for something involving deidara and itachi on the same team. Just so you guys know, since I forgot to mention, I don't like doing yaoi. So don't request it.
"I refuse to be partnered with someone who has such little appreciation for art any longer, hn!" shouted the blonde haired artist obstinately. The other man stood in the corner and 'hmph'ed.
"As if I wanted to be on your team anyway, freak." Itachi mumbled under his breath. He, itachi, the famed prodigy of the Uchiha clan- stuck on the same two man team as this low life 'artist'. Leader had decided the arrangement as a temporary two weeks prior, after Sasori had died and Kisame had asked for a couple weeks off on break.
"See, leader, he's completely unmanageable!" the blonde shouted indignantly.
"At least I look like a guy." Itachi said, muttering some more. In the two weeks they had been partnered, the team hadn't been able to get a single mission done for all their fighting.
"Sasori-dana says I'm plenty manly enough, hn!" Itachi knew he had struck a weak point with Deidara's sensitivity about his looks.
"Maybe if you cut your hair and wore something that looked less like a dress people would stop mistaking you for a girl!" he sniggered, trying to control himself les he go into fits of unrestrained laughter.
"Sasori told me it does not look like a dress, and you wear the same thing!" Ooh, was Itachi in for it now.
"Why don't you and Ass-ori just elope? Oh, that's right, he's dead!" Itachi would've cackled, but merely shouted so as to retain his badass composure. A veritable inferno burned under Deidara's eyes.
"That's it! Katsu!" Deidara shouted, throwing a clay spider at Itachi. Itachi ducked, sending the spider spinning towards the opposite wall of the Akatsuki base. Bits of rock rained down form the ceiling. The akatsuki leader sighed.
"Very well. Itachi, you're back with Kisame." He said, gesturing towards the fish man, who had mysteriously appeared into the center of the room. Itachi, suddenly overcome with happiness, threw his arms around Kisame.
"Finally! I get away from that freak!" Itachi shouted while walking out of the room.
"Tobi, get in here!" Leader shouted, as a dopey looking man in an orange mask resembling a lollipop stumbled through the doorway. Deidara groaned.
"You mean I'm stuck with this freak?!" Deidara admonished.
"Make sure he doesn't get killed, okay? If he does, Zetsu won't be pleased…and we definitely don't want that."
"Yay, I get to be in akatsuki now!" cheered Tobi, bouncing up and down happily. Deidara started to cry.
"Noooooooo!"