Chapter Two: Minnesota, Wyoming, and Alaska. Ft. The Twin Cities
"Goal!" Minnesota shouted and threw his arms in the air. He turned to me and grinned. "I've kicked your butt five times in a row, Dad. Don't you want to stop yet?" he asked and leaned on his hockey stick.
I took off my hockey mask and sighed. "You are definatley my brother's nephew." I said.
"Thanks?" Minnesota said.
"Way to go Minnesota!" Wyoming and Alaska cheered.
I huffed. "Hey! I was close that time!"
Wyoming rolled her eyes. "Sure Dad, 50 to 9 is totally close." she replied and started to walk toward us.
The Twin Cities ran ahead of Wyoming and Alaska. "Way to go Dad!" Minneapolis exclaimed. "I knew you could beat that old geezer!"
St. Paul frowned at Minneapolis. "That's rude, you have to be more civilized!" he scolded.
Minneapolis sneered. "Like you?"
"Yeah, like me. You're a slob!" St. Paul replied.
"Take that back!"
"Make me!"
Minnesota rolled his eyes and picked up Minneapolis. "D-Dad!" she squealed. "Put me down! I'm to old to be carried!"
"Oh yeah? You were acting like a baby, so why shouldn't I treat you like one?" he said.
"I was not acting like a baby! If you should pick up anyone, it should be St. Paul!" she pouted and folded her arms.
"Hey," Alaska grunted and frowned. "You shouldn't be fighting."
Minnesota nodded in agreement, and put down Minneapolis. "So, Dad," Minnesota said to me. "I was thinking about going fishing with The Twins, Wyoming, and Alaska. You want to come?" he offered.
I almost rolled my eyes. Fishing and hockey, he was Mattie's nephew. "Sure. Why not?" I said. "Wait, you got an extra fishing pole? Jenna broke mine." Which was a stupid question, Minnesota always had extra fishing supplies.
Minnesota raised his eyebrow. "Broke? How?" he asked and folded his arms.
I scratched the back of my head. "Well, she wanted to borrow it, and um, she kinda went deep sea fishing with Kevin, and, it snapped when she was realing in a marlin." I explained. Minnesota exhailed. He was only mad becuase it was the fishing pole he bought me for Christmas. And Minnesota gets very worked up about fishing. It's like his state sport or something.
"You know how much that thing cost?" He asked. "I'm kind of tight on money right now, Dad. So, I hope she offered to buy you another one."
"Yeah, she did. Don't worry 'bout it. 'Kay?" I said.
Something made a buzzing noise after I said that. I looked around. Alaska sighed and took his phone out of his pocket, he looked at it and frowned deeply. "Dad, it's for you." He said and pushed the phone into my hands.
I frowned at the phone and read the Caller ID: Mom.
"Dude! I'm not talking to your Mom! She's calling you not me." I exclaimed at pushed the phone back into Alaska's hands.
"Thanks a lot, Dad," he muttered and answered it. "Hey Mom. How's it going?"
After a moment of silence he said, "Oh, you want to talk to Dad?" he said and cast a sideways glance at me.
I groaned when he handed me the phone. "Hello Russia." I said coldly.
"America." she responded.
"What do you want? I was about to take my two boys, daughter, and grand-kids fishing." I said. It still sounds weird calling The Twins my grand-kids.
"Actually, I'm taking us fishing." Minnesota corrected.
I ignored him and waited for Russia's responce. "I want Alaska to come over to my house for a few days." she said.
My frown deepened. "Well, I don't know if that's okay. Why don't you ask him?"
"He'll say no, you know that."
"Well, What's your reason? He's apart of the United States." I objected.
"You can come along if you wish," Russia said but sounded really annoyed about it.
"I'll think about, I'll call you back." I said and hung up.
"What was that about?" Minnesota asked and hefted the hockey stick and held Minneapolis's hand, who was struggling to get away from her father.
"Oh, nothing," I said casually and shrugged. "Just Russia being annoying as usual."
~~~
Minnesota was cleaning fish in the kitchen with St. Paul and Minneapolis. While I watched becuase, I had no idea how to clean a fish. Minnesota told St. Paul to throw away the fish guts, but he shivered and declined. But Minneapolis happily obliged and carried the fish guts to the trash. Minnesota fisnished cleaning the fish and wiped the blood on the apron he was wearing, which was already pretty stained with blood. "Hey, Paul, get the skillet out please." he said and took the apron off and hung it in the closet.
"Sure, Dad." St. Paul said, opened a cuppord and handed Minnesota a frying pan.
"Thank you," he replied and plopped the cleaned fish on the skillet.
I walked over to Minnesota and looked over his shoulder. "Smells good, is it catfish?"
Minnesota nodded. "Yeah, now. Let me fry my fish and you go play cards with Wyoming or something." Minnesota said and sprinkled some seasoning on the fish.
"But I don't wanna! Emma always cheats when we play cards!" I pouted and folded my arms.
Minnesota laughed a little. "Just ask Alaska to play, he doesn't like it when people cheat."
"Okay, fine." I said and marched out of the room.
Wyoming was lounging on the couch and watching TV, while Alaska was sitting quietly next to her. He glanced over at me and nodded. "Hello Dad." He said shortly and settled his hands in his lap. Wyoming looked over at me and grinned. "Minnesota kick you out of the kitchen?" she asked.
I nodded. "Yeah, you guys want to play cards?" I asked and walked over to a desk and rummaged around for a deck of cards.
"Sure!" Wyoming exclaimed. "I'll kick your butt, just like always!"
"You win because you cheat," Alaska said flatly and frowned at his sister.
Wyoming frowned and brushed a peice of her blonde hair out of her face. "What do you know Alaska? Your still considered Sewerd's Folly to me." Wyoming hissed.
Alaska's forehead creased as he got up from the couch. "Oh? Gold was discovered in my state, and everyone went rushing to my place to strike their fortune. Including you. Not such a folly, now am I?" Alaska said coldly.
Wyoming growled. "Why you little...BUCKY, GET IN HERE!" she shouted and then the door started to shake, pretty soon, a large bull buffalo charged through the door. Bucky snorted and tossed his head.
"Medved!" Alaska called and a large male bear lumbered through the door.
"Come on guys! You really had to bring Bucky and Medved?" I exclaimed.
But Wyoming and Alaska didn't listen to me. "Hei! Hva faen gjør dere der!" Minnesota called from the kitchen.
"In American, Hal!" I called and sighed, that boy has gotta stop speaking Norwegian, Danish, Swedish, AND French to me. I don't understand those languages.
"Sorry, I meant, what the HELL are you doing in my living room? I heard the words 'Bucky' and 'Medved'!" Minnesota shouted.
"Uhhh-" Before I could say a complete sentance, Minnesota stormed into the room and stopped when he saw Alaska and Wyoming glowering at each other with their vicous animal partners at their side.
"If God be my witness, I will drop-kick both of your asses into next year if you don't get them out. I'll get Howl in here if I have to." Minnesota warned.
"Just let me and Medved show her who's boss, then Medved will go back to the barn." Alaska said and cracked his knuckles.
"Paul!" someone whispered behind me. I turned around to see Minneapolis peeking around a corner and grinning. St. Paul poked his head out a bit his lip.
"Go back in the kitchen you two."I said and herded them into the kitchen.
"C'ome on Grandpa!" Minneapolis whined and crossed her arms. "Dad was going to kick their butts! And we never see Howl anymore."
I ignored her and went back to the living room. "Howl won't stand a chance against Bucky," Wyoming scoffed and patted Bucky on the back.
Minnesota sneered. "Howl eats buffalo like Bucky for breakfast, literally."
"Well, Medved could eat Howl and Bucky if he wanted to," Alaska shrugged and glanced at his bear friend.
"I've had enough of this," Minnesota said. "Bucky, Medved, out."
Bucky and Medved glared at each other once more, before lumbering in a sigle-file line out. Minnesota wiped his hands and smiled slightly. "So, who wants some catfish?"
-
"Dad!" Wyoming called from behind me.
I turned slightly. "Yeah, what is it Emma?" I asked.
She looked out of breath, but exited. "There's a rodeo goin' on tonight, want to come? You can be the guest of honor!" she exclaimed and waved a flier in my face.
I grabbed the flier from her and read it over.
GRAND RODEO IN JACKSON, WYOMING
The rodeo takes place at 7:00 at Jackson, Wyoming. All are invited!
Bring the kids too! We got a rodeo clown!
Host and Bronco rider: Emma Jones
I shrugged. "I might go, England said she might invite me over for tea and scones." I said. But I really wanted to go, it reminds me of when I was a kid. I was the baddest kid in the West.
"Really Dad? England's scones?" Wyoming asked and a grin spread over her face. "I know it's not the scones and tea you want."
I blushed slightly. "Now listen here young lady..." I started but Wyoming looked like she was going to burst out laughing.
"Fine you little goof," I said and put her in a head-lock. "I'll come." I gave her a quick noogie and then let her go.
"Alright," she said and grinned. "See you at seven!"
~~~
I arrived at the rodeo not in my red Ferrari, but in my old beat up pick-up. I was wearing faded jeans, an old flanel, and worn out sneakers. I parked my pick-up and walked toward the place where they were having the rodeo. I kept my eyes peeled for Emma, she said she'd meet me by the enterance. I loitered around until I spotted her dirty-blonde hair. I was about to call to her, but I saw she was talking to a boy. He had windblown brown hair, dark eyes, and needed to shave.
I narrowed my eyes at them and adjusted my glasses. The boy probably saw me staring, gave her a fleeting kiss, and left. Wyoming stood there for a second, then looked around and saw me. She hurried over and I grinned from ear-to-ear. "Who was that?" I asked, still grinning.
"None of your buisness." she mumbled and she got real red.
"Come on, you were teasing me about England. Who was he? I want to know who's gonna be the father of my grandchildren." I said and felt like breaking down laughing.
Wyoming went completely red. "W-what?" she sputtered.
"I'm kidding!" I laughed and pulled her into a hug with my arm. "But seriously, who is he."
"Henry Jefferson." she said.
I pulled back my arm and smiled. "Well good for you kiddo. Come on, let's go find a seat." I said and she led me in.
After twenty minuets of looking, we finally found a spot to sit. When the rodeo began, a dude came out into the ring and started talking about stuff, I wasn't really paying attention. Then the first rider came in riding a bull, he was wipping his hat around and looking like he was having a grand old time. Until he fell off, that is.
The rodeo clown came on next, he started with one of his corny jokes, and everyone laughed. Gosh this felt good, I haven't been to a rodeo in years. After awhile Wyoming shook me. "Gotta go Dad, I'm gonna ride next."
"O-" I stopped. "Wait, can I, uh, ride too?"
"What?"
"You know, hop on a ol' bronco? For old times sake?" I asked, and gave her my puppy dog eyes.
Wyoming looked thoughtful for a moment, then nodded. "Sure, I've never seen you ride. Minnesota said your the best in the West." she said and grinned.
"Just the West?" I asked and grinned along with her. We both got up and laughed, then walked toward the place wehre they kept the bulls and horses.
Wyoming went the the announcer and whispered something in his ear. He raised an eyebrow at her, then nodded. "There's been a change in plans! Emma Jones's brother, Alfred Jones, will be riding!" he announced in a loud voice. Wait, brother? Oh I get it, it would be weird to be called her dad when we look about the same age.
I nodded to her and jumped up on a bronco, who was impatiently snorting and butting it's head up againts the cage. The cage swung open and the bronco lept out and tried to buck me off. "Whoa!" I yelped as it almost threw me off. I held on the the reins and I have no idea how long I stayed on that thing, but people were cheering like mad.
When I finally fell of, some guys rushed out and grabbed the spirited horse by the reins and led it away. I got up, brushed of my jeans and walked out the ring, waving and smiling at all the cheering people. "Alfred is King!" I shouted and jogged out.
I found Wyoming talking with Henry Jefferson, when he saw me he smiled. "Hi Al! Emma told me I could call you that, great riding tonight!" He said and shook my hand.
"Thanks, Henry." I said and grinned. This dude wasn't so bad. He knows a cool dude when he sees one.
"Well, Nice seein' ya, sis." I said and winked at Wyoming.
She smiled back at me. "See ya, bro."
I waved at them and started walking to my old pick-up.
That was fun.
-
"Dad! You're seriously not making me got to Mom's." Alaska exclaimed as his eyes widened.
"Hey, your Mom wants to see you," I replied. "I'll be going with, don't worry."
"But still! Since when has Mom wanted to see me?" Alaska inquired.
"Since now. Come on. Don't make me get Kevin." I warned and stuffed a shirt in my suitcase.
Alaska huffed. "I'm not scared of Texas. He should be scared of me." he said and crossed.
I smiled a bit. "Okay, fine. But your still going. It's only for two days."
"Fine." Alaska finally gave up and started packing his suitcase.
~~~
Alaska and I were sitting on the plane, on our way to visit Russia. Alaska sighed and glanced out the small windows, I glanced at him. "What's wrong, Sasha?" I asked and ruffled his hair.
The corners of his lips lifted a bit. "Well, I'm not looking forward to seeing Moscow. Or St. Petersburg. Or any of them." Alaska admitted.
"Aww don't worry. Your half brothers and sisters will be super exited to see 'ya!" I said.
Alaska shrugged. "I guess so."
~~~
I knocked on Russia's huge door. "Heelloo? Russia? It's Alaska and America!"
The door open and Lithuania was standing there. "Oh! Hello America and Alaska." he said and smiled.
"Dude!" I exclaimed and pulled Lithuania into a bear hug.
"N-nice to see you too A-America," Lithuania stuttered and I let him go. "Please, come in." He said politley and opened the door wider so Alaska and I could walk in. We waltzed in and the a voice called from the kitchen. "Father? Who's at the door?"
"Oh! Vilnius, America and Alaska are going to be staying here for the weekend." Lithuania replied and led us into the kitchen.
Vilnius was leaning on broom and smiled when he saw us. "Hello, America. Alaska." he said.
Alaska nodded to Vilnius. "Hey, kiddo. Long time no see." I said with a wide grin.
"Good, I wonder were Latvia and Estonia are," Lithuania wondered.
"And Riga and Tallinn." Vilnius added.
"We're up here!" a voice called from upstairs. Lithuania quickly glanced around the room and nodded toward Vilnius. "You can put the broom away, your done in here."
Vinlius nodded and put the broom into a closet and walked up the stairs to go find Estonia, Latvia, and their capitals. Alaska and I followed because we didn't know what else to do.
Latvia and Riga were dusting the bookshelf vigorusly while Estonia ad Tallinn were shouting at each other in Estonian.
"What's wrong?" Lithuania asked Estonia.
"Russia demands the whole house be cleaned in an hour. An hour Lithuania! She wants it to be spick and span because she's hosting a ball tonight!" Esonia exclaimed and cursed in Estonian.
"A ball? Why didn't she tell us before?" Vilnius asked, his forehead creased with annoyance.
"You know Russia. Come on, we better get working. Estonia, you work on the downstairs area," Lithuania directed. Estonia nodded reluctently and ran out of the room. "Tallinn, you go and clean the dining room. Lativia, you and Riga go and finish the living room. Vilnius and I will finish the upstairs." he said then left the room, probably to look for cleaning supplies. Vilnius, Tallinn, Lativa, and Riga scattered, leaving me and Alaska standing in the room.
~~~
"There, done." Lithuania said and wiped his forehead with the back of his hand. I frowned and leaned on my broom.
"You're welcome." I huffed.
Lithuania looked at me and smiled. "Oh, and thank you for the help, America." he said gratefully.
Vilnius leaned over to his Dad, whispered something, then they both laughed. Vilnius probably said something about my cleaning, he was right of course, I am horrible at cleaning. But, it still hurt my feelings. "Lithuania? Estonia? Latvia?" A female voice called from downstairs.
Lithuania turned white and exhailed. "Let's go downstairs," He said and herded Vilnius downstairs. Alaska and I followed them down the stairs.
Estonia stood with his head bowed to Russia and Moscow, while Riga and Latvia were shaking. Only Tallinn folded his arms and stood strait. "Ah, Alaska, America. There you are," Russia said and completely ignored Lithuania and Vilnius.(They looked pretty glad about it)
She hugged Alaska but Alaska didn't hug back. "Hello Mother." He said stiffly. She let go and glared at me and I held up my hands. What did I do? Moscow came over and grinned at his half-sibling.
"Hello Amerikanskiy." Moscow laughed and ruffled Alaska's hair. (And Alaska was about a foot taller than his half-sibling)
"Yes, hello Kommunista Ublyudka." Alaska said flatly.
Moscow looked offended and angry all at the same time. "Smotretʹ spinu, suka." he threatened and stalked away.
Alaska smiled smugly after him. "So," Russia said to Lithuania. "I hope that the house is clean for the ball I am hosting this evening, da?" Russia asked.
Lithuania nodded. "Yes, Ms. Russia." he said.
"If you don't mind me asking, Ms. Russia," Vilnius blurted. "Why didn't you tell us earlier that you were hosting a ball?"
Russia froze and stared at Vilnius, who held her gaze calmly. Lithuania looked back and forth between them and bit his lowerlip. So Vilnius bad mouthed Russia, so what? My kids bad mouth me all the time and the atmosphere doesn't get all weird and creepy like this.
"Oh, Russia," I interrupted. "We didn't bring anything formal." I said and desperatley tried to get out of going to the ball, I wanted to go site-seeing, maybe teepee a Russian castle or a house or Russia's house.
"I may have some formal wear for you both upstairs." She said and turned to climb up her magnificent stair case.
Alaska shrugged and followed his mother up the stairs. "Why, me?" I asked and followed Russia and Alaska up the stairs.
~~~
I have to say, I looked pretty damn hot in that tux. I smiled at myself in the mirror and leaned in closer to adjust my glasses. I heard shouting from the room next to mine. I naturally started to get curious and nosy, so I snuck out in the hall and pressed my ear to the door.
"What were you thinking? Asking Russia a stupid question like that. Do you know where stupid questions get you? No where. But they give you a good whipping and no food for a week." I heard Lithuania shout. I don't think I've ever seen, (Or heard) Lithuania so mad before.
"It was just a question. She should treat us better. We come here to work on our own free will, but you still act as if we're under her rule. She can still whip us to death if she wants, it's just madness! I say we just up and leave and go back to our place. We've been here a week, Father. Don't you think we should just go?" Vilnius shouted back, his voice holding more annoyance than anger.
It was quiet for a moment, then I heard footsteps coming to the door. "We will not speak of it the rest of the night, do you hear me Jonas?" he asked, using Vilnius's human name.
"But Father-"
"We will not speak of it!" He said forcefully.
I quickly ran back to my room before Lithuania opened the door. I walked out and pretended to act as if I didn't hear a thing. Lithuania turned towards me, he was dressed up for the ball. His hear was tied back and he was wearing a tuxedo with a tie. His face looked flushed as he forced a smile at me. "Hello Mr. America." He said politely.
"Yeah, hey dude." I replied and smiled back.
I scampered down the steps and saw that Russia had invited a lot of the countries. I saw Ireland and Germany in deep conversation, they both held a bottle of beer and smiled. Luxembourg was frowning at Netherlands, who was smoking his pipe and Belgium was also giving him looks. Nicaragua, Hondures, El Savador, and Panama laughed and danced around Mexico who was waving around a sombrero.
I saw Russia and walked up to her casually, my hands in my pockets. "Nice party you got here." I said.
I looked around and saw Vilnius talking to his friend Warsaw, who was laughing and punching him in the arm. Lithuania was talking with Poland (who was wearing a tux, which kinda surpised me) and Lithuania sighed and shook his head.
Tallinn and Helskini were just chatting and Riga and St. Petersburg were chatting.
Alaska was standing there by himself, sipping from a vodka bottle. I walked over to him and stood by him. "Nice party, huh?" I asked.
He shrugged and took a swig from the bottle. "I actually kinda wish the states were here." Alaska admitted.
I blinked, he's usually anti-social. Especially towards the states. "Are you drunk?" I asked, then laughed after I said it.
Alaska chuckled and shook his head. "No, I just realised how much better it is at your place than at Mom's." he said and glanced around.
I took out my IPhone and went to my contacts. I had a special one that said 'States', so I could text them all at once. 'There's a party at Russia's, be here if thirty!' I texted.
I had no idea how the hell they'd get here in thirty minuets, but whatever. This is a story, I can break the laws of physics if I want to. I slipped my phone back in my pocket and told Alaska I was going to get a beer. He nodded and chugged his vodka.
I went to go grab a beer and walked over to Ireland and Germany, who were now wasted.
"-then I shoved a potato up his ass and I was like, "Why do 'ya have that potato up yer ass?'" Ireland slurred and laughed. Germany laughed and pounded Ireland on the back.
I frowned. What. The. Hell? First of all, how do you shove a potato up someone's ass? And second of all, how many beers have they had?
I shrugged and walked away, leaving Ireland and Germany laughing histarically.
The doors swung open and I saw everyone turn. "Hey, hey, hey!" I heard a voice shout, I then realised it was Texas. He had shaved his mini-goatee and was wearing a t-shirt and faded jeans. "There was a party, and 'yall didn't invite us?" he laughed.
Almost everybody groaned, with the exeption of Germany and Ireland. "We didn't invite you guys because we don't like you!" Spain shouted. I guess Spain was still sore about the Cuba incident.
"Well that ain't nice." Arizona said and he glanced around for Spain.
"It wasn't supposed to be, you nimrod." California said to him and hit him in the shoulder.
Russia stormed up to me and glowered at me. "What the hell Amerika? Why did you invite them?" she hissed at me.
I held my hadns up, usually Russia would give me a creepy smile and start saying 'kolkolkol' or whatever. She kinda reminded me of her brother, Belarus, only in a girl-version. "Hey, Alaksa was getting lonley. He said he wanted them to come." I explained.
Idaho walked over to get a beer and Ireland saw him. "Heeeeeeeey laddie." He exclaimed and slung an arm around his shoulder.
"Uh, hey Ireland," He said nervously.
"You still trying to rip me off laddie? I'm the origional 'home of the potato'." he slurred.
"Uhhh okay." Idaho said and tried to move away from Ireland.
Ireland just shrugged and turned back to Germany. Idaho glanced in my direction, shrugged, and walked away. "That was weird." I said and took a sip of my beer.
-
Minnesota frowned at a peice of paper in his hand. "Whatcha got there, Hal?" I asked and glanced over his shoulder.
"I don't know exactly, it says something here about Paul beating a boy up." he said uncertainly and squinted at the paper.
"Really?" I asked, not hiding my surprise. St. Paul was usually the type of person to avoid fights. It was his sister that was a trouble maker.
"Yeah, I'll have to have a talk with him when he gets back." Minnesota decided and stuffed the paper in his pocket.
Minnesota got up from the couch and went upstairs. "Where're you going?" I asked as I flopped down on the couch and turned on the TV.
"Ask Wisconson if he wants to have a drinking contest." he said and jogged up the stairs.
I rolled my eyes. He better not go out driving.
~~~
"Oooh, Paul, you are in soooo much trouble!" I heard Minneapolis's voice as the door shut softly.
"Shut up! Dad might hear you!" St. Paul's voice whispered furiously.
"Kiiiiiids?" Minnesota's voice slurred from upstairs.
Here we go. I thought and flipped through channels on TV.
"Hey Dad!" Minneapolis called.
Minnesota stumbled down the stairs and staggered over to them. "Dad, did you and uncle Wisconson have a drinking contest again?" Minneapolis asked.
"You bet we did," Minnesota slurred.
"You win?"
"You bet I did," he said and jabbed a thumb to his chest. "Yer ol' Dad is the best at everything."
St. Paul tried to sneak upstairs but Minnesota glanced at him. "Where d' you think yer goin', boy?"
St. Paul froze. "No where."
"Get yer butt down here. I gotta talk to 'ay 'bout sumthin'." he slurred and pointed to the ground beside him.
St. Paul walked down the stairs and stood in front of Minnesota. Minnesota unexpectedly ruffled St. Paul's hair and laughed. "Good job boy! Was that kid bullin' 'ya?" he asked.
St. Paul hesitated, then nodded.
"Well good fer you. If you'll excuse me, yer pa's gonna take a nap." Minnesota said and plopped down on the couch next to me and started to snore.
-
Author's Note:
I was in ther middle of Alaska's part and it was taking forever so I just wrote a bunch of filler crap. :/
Sorry for the wait, this one isn't very good.