A/N: OH MY GOSH. Seriously? You really think this one's got potential ? .... AWWW (hugs for everyone!) I have never written for OHSHC, this would be my first—my first slash pairing too. Soo... I do appreciate all the reviews and the faves and alerts, thank you! :D And, SORRY if you guys had to wait a month (was it?) for the update, I'm just a really, really busy senior high school student. GAH. ANYWAY, go on to the story now. :D

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING (well the concept now is mine)

ATTEMPT 256

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Attempt 3

The King asked us to play hide-and-seek today; he's really going to have to get over the commoner's way of living...its taking its toll on us. Festivals on Monday, Part-timing on Tuesday, and now spending completely valuable time playing some pointless game of hiding...Damn I'm tired.

I looked up to see Hikaru looking bored as well, his uniform's blazer shed off and resting on his lap, while his head propped up by his hand. I absentmindedly smiled, just as he turned his gaze from the floor to me. "What are you so happy about?" his tone encased all of the dullness of the game.

It just simply wasn't OUR type of game. Hiding isn't something the Hitachiins' do.

I blinked, opting to look to the floor "Eh..." I can't tell him I'm just happy about him actually TALKING to me, can I? That'd be too needy...and he'll get suspicious. Hikaru may look like an overbearing dense person, but in reality (in MY reality) he's just as sharp on the uptake as me. He'll figure out that something's off, and continue to annoy the reason out of me.

"Just tell me, please?" I couldn't even look at him; although his voice was begging me to, the urge to just keep the reason to myself was breaking. But the problem now is exactly HOW do I tell him? I scanned through my belongings, looking for a paper or something to write on: nothing. There was absolutely no place where I could scribble down that something 'embarrassing' and 'wrong'. Hope flew away at that moment, and I sighed, drooped down and said "...can't."

Hikaru arched his brow, scrutinizing my sudden 'hopelessness' and took out his phone (that's identical to mine only in the colour blue) and snapped a picture, "Looking for a paper at the technological age isn't like you Kao." He smiled at the copied graphic and tilted his head.

"I think...something's wrong, in the picture your face's red."

Oh yeah, the freaking camera phone had flash...so even when we're at the dark when it flashes the real colour of whatever shows, unless the thing's just really really close then it become white. He was beaming at the picture and then switched to look at me. I can't say I wasn't happy, that he's showing concern like a kid to a candy, but... it was Hikaru...in the end, I'll do anything for his attention.

He turns his screen to me, indeed I was looking at the floor with a blush across my cheeks, "...It's, it's just the heat." I stammered. He smirks, his face screaming the 'yeah-right-as-if' look.

Then an idea came to mind: if he really wanted to know what's up, then all the liabilities confessing to him will be his fault. Confusing? A bit: it just means that it's not my fault—or it wasn't my choice when I confessed. He forced it out of me, so if he wasn't expecting to hear that then...tough, but at least he'd finally know what I feel for him. It's decided, the next time he pushes for the 'what's wrong' question, I'll just tell him.

"Oh...just the heat huh?"

"Yeah..."

Any second now, I know Hikaru. I know he won't let go the fact that I'm 'hiding' something from him, because after all. He is a Hitachiin, and we Hitachiins don't like hiding, and besides that...Hikaru just isn't the 'wait patiently'type.

"Okay then, I'll get you ice cream after the game, Kao."

Huh? Hika—...

"B-But!" W-wait... aren't you going to ask about me? Hikaru!?

"Hmm?" he was looking at me, expecting a question to be thrown his way.

I thought I heard something fall of a cliff, like my third attempt just going suicidal on me; I faced him with a rather frustrated look on. "...Thanks," I sighed and smiled haplessly accepting what happened.

Kaoru, if hiding wasn't a Hitachiin thing, then why are you so freaking good at it?

Day 3042

I trudge back into my flat, ripping the illustration board to shreds as I headed over my bedroom. Nobody understood my mood today, not even the college's psychologist and my own private one. I just felt so dead today, as if everything was sucked from me and I'm just an empty shell walking around trying to pass for a living human being.

There was this uncanny feeling of looming disaster that just won't leave me alone. Was it the fact that Hikaru didn't seem to understand me anymore, or was it the moment where I woke up in his room with only a note to greet me? Possibly both, but the more prominent one is the former.

We're twins, and NOW he doesn't get ANYTHING...it took me 256 times, 256 long and embarrassing days just to realize that the Hikaru I was hoping to see wasn't there: the older brother that would automatically know that something's wrong, the older brother that would notice and listen to me without question, or simply that older brother that would love me. Or...maybe even the Hikaru that would...just be that Hikaru that would know me as Kaoru—not his brother, not his twin, but just a person that loves him dearly.

I found myself buried under the confines of my bed, pillow and blankets. Misery was once again my guest for the evening. I pulled the covers over my head and barricaded myself with the pillows, settling for a long sleep to make me forget the horrible outcome of 256.

'Of course I know you. You're my twin, my brother—there will be things that I'll forget, but I know that I'll never forget my first best friend and brother.'

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU WANT FROM ME!?" Footsteps were already ringing from behind the door, and then came a knock. "Go away, Tamaki—leave me alone."

I should've known that that would make him try even harder, "Kaoru! I told you this would happen, what did Hikaru do now?" he yells from behind the door.

Ignoring him would've have been easier if I hadn't had my hopes broken again, or if I hadn't had my hopes too high. I'm just really stuck and sucked into that black-hole of being jaded. A lot of times this had happened, but only recently did my entire world start crumbling.

"It's not his fault." I say quietly, defending him in his absence.

I hear something fall over, and a slight bang on the door "You keep saying that! Keep telling yourself that it's not his fault—it's always NEVER Hikaru's fault, it's always you that's wrong! You think that just because Hikaru's too dense to see what's been there for so long, that everything's your fault? Kaoru, I've seen you stand after all that: I've seen you fight off every single obstacle that would meet you, but the question is what did Hikaru do? Have you ever asked that, Kaoru?! Answer yourself honestly...were you really expecting him to understand?!"

I found myself stepping out of bed and heading towards the door, Tamaki was right. I never gave Hikaru enough credit for what's happening to me, it's always a self-centred blame directed to myself. But about expecting him to understand...I know I did, I know I wished him to understand—I hoped he'd hear me this time. But underneath all that, I think I was doubting myself, protecting myself from getting hurt by using alternative ways to tell him....so that when he answers something I didn't want to hear, I wouldn't get hurt that much.

"—Kaoru...have you ever thought that maybe, deep down...you're not ready to tell him?—"

But every time he doesn't understand, I still get hurt. So what's my reason for those silly games? Maybe I'd know, maybe if I just step back a little and view what I did for 256 times and spot what's wrong then I'll get to see what I'm doing right and where I start to mess up—where I start to forget my purpose to why I started the game.

"—To tell him that you love him."

That's right. That was my REAL motive, to tell him what I feel...but somehow in the middle of those ideas, hesitant questions popped and resulted to crushing my confidence (which I have less of). Opening the door, I was faced with a gallon of ice cream and a stack of movies (drama movies of unrequited love) and a very worried Tamaki. I manage to give him a little smile and allowed him to settle the things inside my room.

"I want to tell him—"

"You want to tell him, but have you tried?"

Is he kidding me? I've tried—256 times! How dare he say I haven't tried, how dare he say that I haven't done anything!? For more than eight years I've TRIED, I've wished and done what I should do. "You don't have the right to ask me that, Tamaki. You know as well as I that I did try, I DID." I half-yelled at him. The only thing he does is to smile at me, another rare 'knowing' look on his face as he sits down on the carpeted floor of my bedroom. I followed him to the floor, pressing play to the loaded DVD player and facing the wall with the HD TV, where The Break-Up was playing.

"...So that takes one out of the equation. Now, what about him—has he tried?"

"Who are you trying to kid, Milord. Hikaru would never—he doesn't have to....Well, he's not confessing anything to me, so what would he 'try' to do...unless he feels the same?"

There was short laugh from the blonde, "I mean, has Hikaru tried to listen?"

The voice of Jennifer Aniston was filling the room. I could care less if I missed half the movie, because of over-thinking about what Tamaki had said. Although it was a tried and tested experience, I could never really tell if Hikaru listened, but far as I know that's a question easily answered.

Hikaru POV

"The answer's no! How many times do I have to tell you that?!" Annoying interns, they never learn the implied meaning in the word 'internship' do they? Well...unpaid internship that is. My assistant isn't doing the job I got her too, geez... you just have to do everything yourself if you want everything to be perfect—if only I had someone who knows how I like things, someone who would normally do everything in perfect order without needing me for guidance—

'Need help in your Foreign Languages, Hika?' Identical lips curving up into a gentle smile, ochre eyes gleaming fervently, and his head just tilts slightly to the right as he cast one of his rare-genuine smiles.

I could feel my breathing hitch when his face suddenly pops into mind; Kaoru's always ....My own face starts to fade into something like his (although it's slightly different). I remember how he always read my mind, without my permission to—he just simply knows when I'm about to burst, pull a winged-act, or merely anything at all. It's what I miss, I miss being predictable...being read like an open book, having somebody 'in my pace' without informing them countless times—

"Hikaru Hitachiin in deep thought? Is this possibly an impostor, or are you just really confused?"

I didn't even feel a presence go in to the room, but after that park incident—which was only yesterday—Kyouya's been giving me surprises from interrogation calls to visits, like now. "Cut the crap, Kyouya. What are you doing here?"

The same smug look on his face from behind his clipboard during Host Club times still remained unchanged up until now, "Still as impatient as ever, I see." He sighs and takes out a rather fat-folder, files of course, "Hikaru, do you know what this is?"

"How am I supposed to know what's in that fat folder of yours?"

He pushes his glasses up, causing a glare to cover his ebony-eyes "Guess." He retorts, flatly and I roll my eyes in frustration. Asking me to 'guess' what's in a stupid folder isn't really my kind of 'game'. I never did like people 'hiding' something and then asking me to 'guess' where it was. It's just so sensorimotor stage—since when did I learn about Piaget's cognitive theory?!

Dammit... it's like Kaoru's favourite subject back in Ouran.

"Files—"

"Please, try not to be so elementary about it Hikaru—"

"Would you let me finish!"

Not because I automatically said the word 'files' means I'm going to go all, 'it's a folder, so probably files' on him, that'd be stupid. I know better than to act stupid in front of Kyouya without Kaoru as my backup. My mother isn't really the plain and simple type like the King, he's the complex one—the thinker (no not the statue), and apparently the one that convinced Kaoru to move out of our shared flat.

Yeah I'm not mad...

"Files that contain business with the Ootori Company, that is—if you're speaking business terms, but if it's just the casual approach...I'd think that they're files with information about a certain Souh..."

...I'm just really, REALLY bitter.

He scoffs, "Uh—well...NO! but that's a good guess." He composes himself and takes off his glasses, "Ms. Yuzuha Hitachiin asked me to give this to you, apparently—she wanted to contact Kaoru, but seems like he's been a trouble to contact."

"So my mother asked you?" I didn't mean to sound so pissed, but just thinking about what had happened, drives me boiling to that point of wanting to smack him square in that smug face of his. I could just see him begging pleading for me not to step on his—

"Hikaru. Have you talked to Kaoru?"

Now that he's mention that, I haven't. "I was called to a morning sprint meeting; I couldn't be there this morning. He did stay the night, why are you asking?" it's not like you should care what me and my brother talks or does...Dammit, I have such a dirty mind. How did Kaoru end up having a sick bastard as his twin?

He sighs, "And so... you haven't spoken to him about your...feelings?"

There are two things every man hates/detests/abhors/fears talking about, 1) an intense break-up with an ex with your current, and 2) his feelings. I have no intention of spilling my guts out to Kyouya, that's just taboo—the REALLY bad, and sick one...although incest is.... "No.."

Slightly more accepted in my tastes.

"Do you even plan on telling him?"

At the point on, I took note to never, NEVER let Kyouya in my office without a very important piece of paper to give that's related to work. There's this thing called privacy, I think he must've overlooked it on his way here; a pity, people don't take kindly to overly nosy men. Especially not a man of Kyouya's stature. I was looking at him, a little nerved at the question—I was completely taken aback by it.

Attempt 56

After plan 55 I went into depression, I swore never to come out of my room again. Hikaru wouldn't mind, he's got a lot of things going on nowadays—a lot of those things I can't do. One of those things is dancing. I can't move co-ordinately if I wanted to, the swift change of pace from fast and stiff movements to soft and slow and then to just crumping...it was masterpiece I couldn't find myself in. Hikaru however found his place in it. So much for being identical, so much for spending time together too. I moped around the house, looking for something to distract me, but all I find distracting was that concert ticket he gave me (the white piece of paper with a 'red' mark) if I wanted to watch their show. I was fighting the side that was curious of how he dances and that side that's bitter about it—slowly the former was winning.

Groaning, I grabbed the ticket and shoved it in my wallet. There's no way I'm letting that ticket go to waste. I am a very practical person after all, and if I did get to see Hikaru dance like...a pro then why not? Should I let my inner insecurities hinder me from seeing possibly one of the rarest moments of his life? I guess not. All I've seen Hikaru dance to is either the waltz or the swing—never did I see him doing street dance. Now's my one chance...

"Kao-chan!! I knew you'd come!! Hika-chan would be very happy to see you!!"

Honey was the first person to spot me after I entered the big dome, there's just something about street dance battles that give you that rush of speed while you're inside the area. Even if you couldn't dance. The whole dome was pumping up music, the shouts and cheers for every other participant and their supporters literally shook the whole place. I was in awe, but still I managed to reach my senior.

"Honey, where's Hikaru?" Obviously at the backstage with THE OTHER dancers.

The blonde senior smiled, "Kao-chan you have to be patient. Let me see your ticket!" he showed a white piece of paper with a 'blue' mark on the top. My face was scrunched up, what the...DID HE GIVE ME A WRONG TICKET?! I handed him my ticket, and his reaction didn't comfort me one bit.

"Kao-chan...You're not sitting with us..." he said sadly, his aura gloomy and depressing—until Mori placed a comforting hand over his shoulder. He gulped and forced a smile, "...You're at the VIP section, right at front."

Front? Seriously?! I kept repeating those two words in my head—I peeped at the front row...and indeed there was only one seat left open. The smile on my face was practically permanent until I got to The Seat. I was sitting with girls, some of them were new to me—meaning they don't go to the Host Club, they were wearing shirts with names written on it over and over again.

"Excuse me... but where did you get your shirt?"

I was curious! And... I was wondering if there was one for Hikaru.

She looked at me, "Well...I asked my boy—er... my friend that's performing for it. It's their dance-troupe's shirt." Oh...so I can't just buy that, huh?

"Oh, oh...thank you anyway."

"No problem."

The beeping sounds, video screens and lights started going crazy signalling the start of the competition. The screen was showing clips of the recent participants of last year, showing some that were back, and some newbies daring for the win. The screen showing the backstage caught my view—I watched it like it had glue-gunned my eyes.

"So...who's your...well who are you cheering for?" She asked, stealing my focus.

I hummed, "Well...my—"

"KAORU!?"

Huh? That voice...it's—

"Hikaru!?"

And there he was, wearing a thin white shirt over his purple undershirt and black skinny jeans, not to mention he wore my 'stolen' Vans. I let my eyes wonder to his face—"Hika? What's with the cap?" he was wearing a grey cap in the reverse way, where the thing that was supposed to block the sun was at the back.

He grimaced and shrugged, "Why? Don't you like it?" he asked putting a conscious hand over it.

I could've crushed him in a hug right there and then, but I had to find restrain. The cap looks absolutely perfect on him, it made him look so much cuter then he already is—and that smirk...it complements his whole look entirely. I could've gone the whole time just looking at him, but then I realized he was looking a bit nervous.

"I...love it." I managed to whisper out.

The faultless smile he gave me that time was so different. Like something changed that night, right before the start of the show. I knew I should've gone—and I'm glad I did. He was nervous, and Hikaru is never nervous—maybe because he had me in all those times he should be nervous, that's why he's not used to this feeling. I heard a small 'ding' inside my head and I noticed—he isn't the only twin with confused feelings. What if I tell him now? Right now when he needs the support...maybe, I gave him a soft smile. The smile he gave me faltered and he grabbed my hand, pushing away people in our path and pulls me to an empty space just beside the entrance of the backstage for the dancers.

"We're about to get called back in—any last words of support, little brother?"

There are a few...

"Well... Hika..." his eyes were focusing on mine, he was smiling confidently as he heard his dance troupe's cheering (when they saw their performance on the screen). I took a deep breath, the speaker beside me matching the beating of my heart—"I... I, I lov—"

"LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, WE CALL ONTO THE STAGE LAST YEAR'S REIGNING CHAMPIONS—CRASH CREW!!"

Damn speaker. Seriously, WHAT'S with the TIMING? GOD, can't they wait until I say it AND THEN scream the stupid announcement.

"Kao, Kaoru!! Listen, I have to go—I'll see you after the show," he yells over the cheering of the crowd, the rest of the Crash Crew were already bouncing on the stage while the others were still entering the backstage. I looked back at him, "Al—Alright, good luck!"

He smirked and mouthed a 'you bet' over the noise, and then kissed my forehead quickly before running to the backstage and disappearing from my view. I trudged back to my seat, bested again by fate. 'Maybe tonight's not really the right time' I kept thinking to myself.

"And when exactly is the right time?"

I don't know. when we're the last two people on earth? that way no can interfere. I don't know Tamaki, I just REALLY don't know. I've been trying to tell him, for over eight years and in those times all I got were...divine intervention, climate intervention, person intervention—every single intervention there is. "The right time would be when everything around will just say yes, when everything would quiet down and wait for my say to when things should start moving again." The right time would be when Hikaru would finally understand and say. 'I love you too.'

"What if the right time already passed by, because you're too SCARED to do something about it?"

Silence fell on me.

"People believe in 'the right time', but what if the right time already passed? What then?"

It hasn't. I know in heart that it hasn't, but still...

"We keep on waiting for that one moment, where everything seems to just go with the flow—and then when we finally try to go with the flow ourselves, everything would fall apart. It's unfair, the way we wait."

He let out a short laugh, "Unfair, but still we wait."

"Even if there's not sure way of telling if what we're waiting would actually come."

"Hikaru would come around, he has too..."I say in a bleak attempt of hope. "I don't want this anymore..." I let out a broken sigh, "I don't want to keep on trying my best when he just pushes me aside. I don't want to keep holding on to something that's been shaking me off since the start. I don't want—"

I was cut short by an acute ringing of a phone, my phone to be exact. I had a hard time taking the thing out, and seeing who exactly is ruining our mood. However it was, I don't think it's going to change the mood we were in. If there was one thing I'm sure of right now, it's that—, I should let go...

"It's...Hikaru?!"

A/N: Well that's all for chapter two, hope it didn't suck... and about Hikaru dancing? WELL it's let's just say it's the authoress's preference of boys. Thank you very much for reading, don't forget to give me a heads up if there's something off or just plainly review!