Broken Self-Reflection - Brushstrokes

by Late to the Party

Journeys aren't always easy, especially for those who have had their mind broken, their soul stolen (and reclaimed), and their friends slain. Everything takes a toll. Sometimes a little bit of self-reflection is necessary if one is to find the strength to push forwards. If one is still able to push forwards... (Cross-posted from AO3).

2. 2

2.

The pocket plane was an unwelcome sight. Not as dank as Sendai's enclave, it somehow pulsated with a darkness that reverberated throughout her soul, a soul that she had torn out of Irenicus after he had ripped it from her. As souls went, it was more than a little frayed at the edges, and it was beginning to show. Even the shadow of the Slayer kept its distance from her, as if the avatar of Bhaal himself was somehow wary of pushing her too far.

It was something that neither the Solar nor the imp Cespenar shared. After reading off what amounted to another lecture – as if Alixana was somehow back in Candlekeep – the Solar vanished, leaving her with another chamber to explore. The pocket plane was full of nooks and crannies, chambers of 'testing', as if the real battle wasn't bad enough. One glance at her companions was all the confirmation she needed: further attempts to delve into her still-tapped power was not only expected but demanded. Grief, red and raw, bit Viconia's eyes, but her mouth oozed silent venom, as though her teeth were a portcullis, her lips a gateway. Nearby, Sarevok simply shrugged without moving. How many had he seen come and go? How many had she herself seen fall?

Viconia prepared the rites upon Valygar's body, the warmth all but gone. Alixana knew better than to suggest raising him: resurrection always carried a terrible cost. It cost Sarevok his claim to divinity, and for a demi-god, there were few things worse than being stripped of one's nature: she should know. For Valygar… what would he return as? A shadow of himself, wracked and wretched?

Jaheira, for all her nagging, had been right not to raise Khalid. After the great blade of Minsc had shattered against the Yuan-ti in Nalia's keep, a claw tore out the giant man's throat and Alixana had demanded Jaheira return him… a revenant clawed its way out of Minsc's flesh, a skeletal abomination bound in strips of… she didn't want to think of it. The druid's fire had returned Minsc's wraith to dust, and after that, Alixana swore 'never again'. But 'never' was too soon as she found Sarevok awaiting her after she tore her soul back from Irenicus.