Alister was exhausted. He had dusted everything, made tea for Corvina, Laced up her corset, helped her into the most audacious looking ball
gown he had ever seen, prepared the dining hall and ball room for her gala. Alister now sat behind Corvina's large wooden desk, in her
velvet cushioned chair, with his feet resting on top of the desk. He gently rocked the chair on its back two legs. His eyes were closed as he
listened to his underling scurry around to make sure the final touches were added to everything before the guests arrived. Alister stirred
slightly as he heard the clicking of heels on the stone flooring outside of the office doors.
"Alister, you are my head butler are you not?" Corvina's tone was stern and clearly frustrated 'how can he just be sitting there? I have
dignitaries on their way'.
Alister answered lazily, "I am." Gazing up at her from under strands of his black hair.
Corvina's face turned red "Then why, pray tell, why are you lounging in my office, in my chair, when you still have work to do?" Alister sat the
chair back on all of its legs. Looking sternly at Corvina, he pushed himself against the back of the chair, straightening his posture. Corvina
approached the desk, hershoes clacked loudly on the office floor causing an echo. Alister sat unphased. He interlaced his fingers and crossed his ankles.
"Everything is in order and has been taken care of." Corvina opened her mouth to object. "And you, My Dear, need to lighten up. If you continue to stress
yourself out over something as simple as a dinner party with a group of cranky old hags, heaven only knows how you'll make it through your
coronation."
Corvina's mouth hung open at how boldly he had addressed her. "You dare address me in that tone?" Corvina leaped across the desk at him. Her original plan had been to jump on him, pin him to the chair and stab out his eyes with her pearl handled letter opener. However, plans
never go as planned. Her far too frilly ball gown had snagged on a drawer handle causing her land on him nearly causing the chair to topple
backwards. Alister quickly grabbed the desk to steady the chair. The chair rocked under them, which wouldn't have been so bad if not for the
large stain glass window that was directly behind them. Corvina began attempted to assess the situation. She was on Alister's lap, hanging
sideways off of a chair. She could try to reposition herself, but she was lying under Alister's arm. Alister's grip on the desk was the only thing
keeping them both from falling out the large stain glass window and on to the impaling stakes outside. Corvina mentally kicked herself for not
having them removed, but at the time she thought they looked impressive. How many other Queens have had a bird's eye view of their
touchier fields? None, she was the first. And now she understood why. Corvina moved slightly towards the desk hoping to get the chair
rebalanced.
"Don't do that." Alister's voice gave her chills. Not the nice chills she got from walking into his quarters and seeing him in the process of
dressing himself. The bad chills of alarm, that said, 'Horrible painful death!' Corvina had nudged his arm causing his grip to falter, and the chair
to tilt closer to the window. Corvina slumped back across Alister's lap.
'This man will be the death of me.' Corvina thought to herself. Her eyes widened to the realization of the situation she was in. "You! You will be
the death of me!" She yelled accusingly at Alister. "You want me dead so you can take my place! All those years as my faithful butler and now
THIS! You are trying to be the death of me!" Corvina tried to turn and face her would be assassin. Alister stared down at her in shock, shaking
his head in exasperation.
"Yes, that's exactly it. I'm trying to throw you out the window." His voice dripping with sarcasm. Corvina, outraged at this unforeseen, but
seemingly inevitable, betrayal sat straight up and saw the window crash and then the tips of the spikes below.
'He's done it.' She thought as she stared down at the spikes. 'He has killed me. I am dead, or am dying… Dying is taking awhile.' Corvina
looked around at what had one time been her kingdom. She was saddened by the fact that she would never see it at its full potential. It
would all go to her killer. She began to weep. "You jerk! You evil rotten scoundrel! How could you leave me to die like this?" Corvina waited for
the pain. She knew death would be painful. She had seen, and been the cause of more than a few deaths in her time. She screamed in
anguish. "Why won't it just end?" She stared down at the ground, defeated. "Why?" She sniffled.
"Why won't you shut up!" a baritone voice rang through the air. Corvina jumped. The Bishops had always told her of a loud booming voice that
rang from the heavens.
"Hello?" Her voice quivered as she spoke.
"Don't take this the wrong way" The voice replied "But I think a large horse might weigh less than you."
'Oh wonderful, my afterlife is going fabulous.' Corvina groaned .She was dead and the big booming voice that the bishops had been going on
about though she was fat. "Listen you! Umm.. Sir." Corvina began to rethink her plan of talking to the voice.
"Fifteen years of service and it takes being thrown out of a window to get me any respect from you?" The voice sounded angry with her.
"However "Sir" was a nice touch." Corvina looked up to beseech the mercy of the big scary voice, and then she saw Him.
"Alister?" Corvina was completely lost now. Was Alister an angel? She shook her head 'Not even on his best days'. She starred at him. He was
braced against the stone that had held the glass window in place. The sleeve of his white shirt was drenched in blood and he looked paler
than normal. He was keeling on the stone floor surrounded by colored shards of glass that sparked in the mid day sun, clutching the skirt of
her ball gown. "So I'm not dead?" Corvina asked.
Alister's shoulder was beginning to give out on him. "You will be if you don't start climbing back up here." He growled. "Unless, of course, you
would like the 'Evil, rotten scoundrel' to leave you here to die. Isn't that how you phrased it?" Corvina blushed. She reached for the stone
siding sliding her and along the crevasse until she found a place sturdy enough to act as a hand hold. Alister released his grip on her skirt.
Grabbing the back of her corset top he hauled her back through the window. They both sat on the floor attempting to catch their breath.
Corvina flopped ungracefully on the cold stone floor. Paying no mind to the pool of blood that coated the area behind her desk. Alister sat with
his back to the wall next to the empty window pane. He looked over to her his features pale with exhaustion and blood loss.
"So did our near death experience teach us anything, Corvina?" He laughed weakly. Corvina crawled over to him. Sitting in front of him her
face mere inches from him.
"Alister" Her voice was nothing more than a whisper. "Get this cleaned up." Corvina then turned to leave the room.
Alister smiled. "Yes m'Lady." He gave a half-hearted bow from his position on the floor and began laughing uncontrollably.
Corvina smiled to herself as she reached the office door. 'He does have a very attractive laugh.'
Returning to her dressing, because she needed something that had not been recently shredded by a window to wear, Corvina caught a
glimpse of herself in the mirror. The carved dark wooden frame hung firmly on the wall concealing a door Alastair often used. Removing the
remnants of the ball gown and the embroidered corset under it Corvina looked at herself in the mirror noticing every imperfection. Everything
from the hint of dark circles under her eyes to slightest shift in weight seemed blaringly obvious. Attempting a global takeover was going to be
difficult, this she knew, but she had nearly overlooked the physical repercussions. Sleep deprivation from writing to foreign ministers, and
attending all these silly parties to keep up appearances with the gentry had begun to take its toll. She longed for the day that the parties
would end, of course the lack of these events would stem from the point that aristocrats cannot host parties in dungeons or from gallows.