Downwards Spiral
A/N:
I own nothing, I am not it this for money, merely the enjoyment of
writing: The world and all the characters belong to the Great and
powerful J.K.Rowling.
Hey
to any of you loyal fans… I know I haven't updated in almost a
year but I've been learning French, and right now I should be
studying romeo and juliette for la rentree en septembre but… Oh
well! Enjoy!!
August 11th, 1999
Life had fallen into a little routine. I would wake up each morning to a room that was spinning wildly. In my quest to find a hangover potion, I would crash my way into the bathroom, waking the entire house, because of course I couldn't keep a potion right next to my bed. After my head was clear I would shower, have breakfast and leave for work.
I never bothered to look in the mirror anymore. I had the image embossed into my brain and I no longer feel 'Saint-like'. The missing ear was one thing, gruesome in its own way. But mixed with my pain stricken face and shadows from too many sleepless nights haunting my features I didn't even want to look.
At work I would sit in my office all day, staring into space. Sometimes imagining how different life would be if I had died instead. Fred was stronger than I am. He wouldn't have fallen to pieces. He would have kept going. If he was here, if he could see me he would never allow me to continue like this.
Verity was a jewel. She kept the store running, no questions asked. I couldn't afford to lose her, I could hardly afford to pay her but she said she'd just badger me for a raise when things picked back up again. Hopeful girl. I was spiraling downwards, and when I hit rock bottom I don't know if I'll be able to climb back up.
But despite all her optimistic comments, the store was failing. Rivaling stores, like Zonko's had begun mimicking our products and because I now lived in a world without laughter, I couldn't bring myself to produce anything new. It just hurt too much. I only kept the store because all our life savings went into this shop, and I had no other credentials. Well, I could always get a counter job at a different joke store I guess, but imagine the gossip when George Weasley, of Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes began working for Thomas Zonko, the entrepreneur we almost put out of business when we started this charade.
Every evening at seven p.m. sharp I would send verity home, lock up the store and make my way to the leaky cauldron.
'Hey Tom, the usual please'
'Sure thing Master
George'
'How's business going for you?'
'Not bad,
most successful pub in the Alley, 'ow 'bout you?'
'Hmmmm,
I'll get back to you'
'Sure thing Mister'
With drink in hand I'd make my way over to the card table and play Wizards' poker, or chat up some bird in the bar. It was a rule that I would only leave when I was completely plastered. There were to different endings to my drunken nights- I would go home with one of the sexy ladies I met in the bar and we'd do unspeakable things, so I have had many one night stands in the past year, or I would end up back at the bar with Tom, where I would pour out my soul, more and more with every drink I took.
'I just, hic, miss him so
much, you, hic, know?'
'Yeah, I know, but 'ow would he want
ya to spend your life?'
'I don't really know'
'Not
like this mister Weasley, your brother would not want ya to waste
your talent bein' a drunken wreck'
Tom was a good guy, he knew how to deal with my brooding and knew exactly when to cut me off. I must have been one of his best customers.
Tonight was different though, tonight I didn't get to the leaky cauldron: Tonight I had family commitments.
'George? Are you there?'
'Damn it Harry. Just leave me alone.'
Harry was smirking,
'You've been in the bathroom for almost an hour, I was just
thinking, you might want to come out of here pretty soon because
there is something you will not want to miss!'
'Yeah like
what?' I grumbled turning to glare at him? 'Charlie brought
Norberta to the party and is just about to confess his undying love
for the dragon species? That would break Mum's heart!' I couldn't
help my self, my voice was dripping with sarcasm.
Harry laughed,
it was the first time I'd made anyone laugh since, well, Fred died.
The feeling it gave me was not the same joy I usually experienced
from filling the world with laughter. It actually felt strange. This
feeling made me glad that I was unable to create any new joke
products.
'Actually no, should I rephrase that? Maybe it's
not something you'd want to see, but I'd like you to be there for
it' He looked at me earnestly, eyes wide behind his glasses and I
could tell straight away that he was serious.
'What's going
on? We've already cut the cake.' I was trying to figure out what
was so important to Harry 'Ginny is officially 18, and got all her
presents. Soon everyone will just be ready to leave the restaurant.'
But I removed myself from the bathroom anyway, and made my way over to the open bar. If Harry was shouting the drinks, why not abuse it. As I made my way back to the table, drink in hand I felt a disapproving glare. I looked around but was unable to find the source. So I continued towards the red-headed party.
As I sat down it was almost as if some one had slapped me in the face and yelled in my ear. My head pounded and I was suddenly overwhelmed by a feeling of worthlessness.
Where did that come from?
'Good,
everyone's back' Harry said with a smile and stood up.
'I
know we are all here to celebrate Ginny's 18th birthday' Harry
began.
Oh no! He dragged me out of my self-pity in order to hear
a speech, you have got to be kidding me!
'And I am aware that
in the wizarding world, 18 is not such an important year. However in
the muggle world, 18 is our coming of age and I must thank every one,
especially Charlie who came all the way from Romania, for being here
this evening, because' He turned towards Ginny. 'Ginny, I love
you, with all my heart' and this is the point where my mum began to
cry, Ginny gasped and all of us stared at Harry, as he got down on
one knee with a little box in his hand.
'For as long as I can
remember you've been a part of my life, and now I want you to
become an even bigger part than just girlfriend. Ginny Weasle, will
you marry me?'
Ginny was grinning from ear to ear, nodding
vigorously as she pulled Harry towards her, kissing him in a way
which made us observers feel uncomfortable.
As Harry slid the
ring on her finger I was once again smothered by that feeling of
worthlessness: My baby sister was getting married, and I've never
been in a serious relationship.
With that, more drinks were brought out and it was almost as if the party was starting again from the beginning.
Amongst all the celebrating, I realized I was
no longer needed and so I made my goodbyes, offered my
congratulations and went back to my routine, but rather than going to
the Leaky Cauldron, I made my way to a nearer pub: The Three
Broomsticks.
The pub was full at this type of night, and you
could hear, as expected, Hagrids loud brawl over top of all the noise
telling some uninterested person passing through about his newest
pet.
I forced my way to the bar.
'Umm, just a firewhiskey
thanks!'
'Sure thing hun'
I looked at the bartender and
realized that it wasn't Madame Rosemerta as to be expected, but
some one much younger, much darker, and much more familiar.
'Angelina?'
'Yeah?'
'Oh um, George, remember'
Smooth move Weasley, how many blokes does she know with one ear?
'Yeah, how've you been?' She looked as if shed just said
the most horrid swear word, her dark eyes went round, 'I mean, umm,
are you, how are, umm' she was stumbling over what to say, trying
so hard not to upset me.
What do I say? Do I tell here how
miserable I am? How much of a failure I am without my twin? How much
I miss him? Do I play it cool?
In the end I let everything out,
All my insecurities, my desire for revenge. How I wished I could
bring him back, my delusions that I sometimes see him.
But in a
pub every one can hear your problems: The person next to me, leant
over and said,
'If you ask me, it's a good thing he's dead,
because all you two ever were, was trouble makers, stupid trouble
makers, you had no respect for nothing, and you annoyed me to. You
know what, I think you are worthless pieces of scum and shoulda both
been killed but it's too--'
I cut through his drunken brawl
with a punch in the jaw
Good
one George.
Huh??
Punch
him again!
'You want to take this outside?' I roared, the entire pub was
staring at me, but I didn't care, I was hearing voices so if I got
arrested I can legitimately plead crazy 'Want to insult me now?'
I punched the poor bugger continuously.
No
George stop! Don't kill him. He can't help being an idiot!With
that I walked out of the pub before I could murder the guy, but not
without noticing the glare from Angelina.
Thanks for stopping me Fred.
A/N: What did you think, I know it goes in a totally different direction to the first chapter, but I'm not a violent sort of person so I'm working on it. Read and review please, constructive criticism welcomed: