Fifty bares his soul. Jeangb. Elliot has always wondered. His world is about to rock when he hears the truth. Will this change his view of his brother? E Grey, C Grey.

A short one off for a beginner. Be kind and review this idea I had in my head.

I don't own any of the characters just borrowing for fun.

Well Thankyou for the reviews quite a surprise. So, I'll carry on

Chapter 2

Christians POV

I've always considered Elliot as my best, probably my only true friend. Although we are adopted brothers, if we had met at grade school, at a game or in a bar we would have been friends.

We were brought together by the two most caring people you could meet; not our biological parents but parents of the heart.

Elliot was too young when he was adopted to have any memories of his real parents, as was Mia. But me, I had memories, horrifying memories of my life before I was adopted. And that's the problem, because of that traumatic early childhood I have real difficulty in totally believing that anyone could want or love me, or, that I was capable of having a loving relationship.

Elliot was nearly seven when I came into his life. I think he was scared of me at first. I had lost the power of speech, I couldn't bear to be touched when he tried to put his arm around me, even in a friendly manner I would hit him and shrink away. I had the most terrible nightmares, I still do on occasions, and no one, not even Mom could hold me to reassure me. When Elliot heard me groaning and thrashing about in a nightmare, he often was at my side before mom or dad got there. He learned not to touch my body but he would put his hands in my hair and gently tug at it to wake me up. Then if my parents said it was ok he would lay on the bed with me, not touching, just being there.

When Mia came into our lives things changed for us all, I found my words! I could touch Mia and Mia could touch me. You see she offered no threat, I knew she could not hurt me but she needed to be safe she was so tiny and I could protect her. I still feel that way now.

As kids, Elliot and I became co conspirators in all sorts of scrapes and games, we hung out together and Elliot would defend me against the bullies.

I had a ferocious temper and would lash out for the slightest reason. Often with kids twice my size. Elliot was nearly always there to pull me off or fight with me.

When we hit our adolescence, of course Elliot being older got there first but I think I got there earlier because he told me allsorts of thing and I copied. He told me when he first kissed a girl and how he had got an erection. It wasn't long before I too was having wet dreams to add to my nightmares. But there was one thing I knew would never happen for me, I would never be able to have any sort of relationship with a girl. That became evident when one of the girls at school threw her arms around my neck and tried to kiss me. I felt as though she was burning me, the pain that seared through my body was indescribable and I had to push her away from me. Of course she was hurt and upset so she called me a weirdo, a gay weirdo. I couldn't explain why she had that effect on me. Naturally, the word got round at school and I was labelled "Gay Grey" I was twelve.

That didn't help my anger issues and was constantly having my parents brought to school to listen to my list of faults. I was expelled from my first school at thirteen my second at fourteen and nearly my third at fifteen.

My folks where at their wits end to know what to do with me, no amount of grounding, withdrawal of privileges talking to, shouting at made any difference. Of course, I felt terrible at causing them so much pain and heartache, but honestly, I could not control my anger and frustration. The feeling s of worthlessness just increased.

I had a shrink, but was an asshole, kept wanting me to talk about my life before I was adopted, "to bring out all the feelings of anger"

I think if there had been an award for jerking off I would have got first prize.

So there I was angry at the world, until my folks insisted I work at Mrs Lincoln's home for the summer to work off my anger and frustration.

Yes she certainly helped work off my problems alright. And I have never told any one in my family about my alternative lifestyle.

So, why was I sitting here, with Elliot, trying to decide, after all this time whether I should tell him.

Possibly two reasons; firstly, is my fear of being abandoned of being rejected by the people who profess to love me. Because once they knew the me and The Marquise De Sade had a lot in common. they surely would.

And the fact that I was having some very strange feelings about the blue eyed brunette who had fallen into my office last week. And they where giving me hope that, although I was denying the fact, I still wanted her to be my submissive, didn't I?