DISCLAIMER: I do not own Fruits Basket or any of its characters or story line. All rights are reserved for its creator.

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Chapter 2: Life and Confessed Feelings…Love and Guilt

A month and a half had past since that horrible night and Tohru was finally allowing herself to get past it. She had no other choice. She, like Yuki and Kyo, had a lot of studying to do for the college entrance exams that were coming soon and she had no time to dwell on what happened that night. She had managed to keep the events of that night locked up tight inside her and the others had never said a word to make her think that they had guessed that something had happened. She had put on a brave face every day since then and fought her demons when she was alone in her room at night where no one would hear her cries as the nightmares plagued her. The nightmares had finally stopped a couple of weeks ago and after finally catching up on sleep she felt herself begin to heal and decided it was time to finally just let it go and become a thing of the past.

Now she sat at the table with Yuki and Kyo pouring over the study guides that Yuki had been nice enough to make up for them. While looking over the mathematics portion Tohru started to feel ill and all of a sudden she jumped up running to the bathroom. Barely reaching the toilet in time she felt like everything she had eaten in the last several days was fighting to come out of her mouth. When her stomach finally quit heaving she laid her head against the cool porcelain of the toilet and took a deep breath.

"Miss Honda are you okay?"

She turned to face Yuki standing in the doorway. Forcing a smile she nodded. "Yes I'm fine really don't worry about me. I must have eaten something that didn't agree with me too well. I'll be out in just a minute."

Once Yuki left Tohru got to her feet and walked to the sink. Running some water she filled a small cup and rinsed her mouth. She knew she wasn't okay. This wasn't the first time she had gotten sick in the last several days but luckily the others had not known anything about that. Placing the now empty cup back down she left the bathroom and headed back to the table to study.

Yuki and Kyo looked up at her as she entered both of them wearing a worried expression on their face. "Tohru go and lay down. You look as pale as death."

Tohru didn't feel like arguing with Kyo so she just did as she was told. Walking up the stairs she decided she would go and visit a doctor. She had a feeling she knew what was wrong but she didn't want to call Hatori because if she was right the last thing she wanted to do was burden the Sohma's with her problem.

When she reached her room she grabbed her purse and quietly made her way back downstairs hoping that Yuki and Kyo didn't hear her as she snuck past. Luckily for her they were both engrossed in the study guides once again and she was able to slip by them and out the door without them noticing.

She walked to the nearest clinic and after signing herself in she waited her turn. As the minutes dragged by she became more and more nervous. Her palms were sweating and her heart was thudding when finally a nurse poked her head through the door leading to the exams rooms.

"Tohru Honda."

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Sitting in the exam room Tohru waited impatiently for her test results to come through and the doctor to come back to talk with her. When the doctor finally came in she looked at her before she sat down her clipboard and pulled up a chair to sit in front of Tohru.

"Miss Honda it seems you're quite healthy. In fact I haven't seen anyone as healthy as you in a long time." Tohru let out a sigh of relief. At least she wasn't sick. "After getting your test results back I must congratulate you, you're going to be a mother and judging from the information you gave us I'm guessing your due date is somewhere in June. I have a number here for an excellent OB-GYN."

Tohru reached out with a shaking hand and took the piece of paper holding the number for the person that would in several months deliver her baby. A baby? I'm going to be…a mom.

The doctor congratulated her once again and left the room. Once Tohru finally wrapped her mind around the idea of becoming a mother she decided that she would raise this baby even though she wasn't ready to be a mother. It wasn't the baby's fault that it was coming and deserved a good mother and Tohru promised herself and her unborn baby that she would be that mother.

Leaving the clinic she wondered just how she was going to do that. She knew she couldn't tell the others. She couldn't imagine what they would think of her but she knew she wouldn't be able to hide it for long. They would find out in just a couple of months when she started showing. I'll just keep it secret for as long as I can and then when they do finally notice I'll tell them about the baby.

With a planned in mind she walked back to Shigure's humming a soft lullaby to herself.

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She had forgotten she a snuck past Yuki and Kyo until she walked down the path towards home and saw them both sitting on the porch waiting for her. "Hello Yuki. Hello Kyo."

"Just where the hell have you been Tohru? We thought you were in your room asleep but when we went to check on you the bed was empty and you were no where in sight."

Tohru knew Kyo was angry because he hated to worry. "I-I'm sorry Kyo. I just decided to go to the clinic and see why my stomach was so upset."

"Miss Honda are you okay?"

"Yes Yuki. I'm really truly sorry that I made you both worry. I…uh…just have a stomach bug that's all. I'll be better in no time."

Tohru sighed in relief when they seemed to by her story. "Well Miss Honda next time please let one of us know and we'll go with you okay?"

"Yes Yuki I will thank you."

When night came she found herself finally alone as she lay in bed thinking about the baby growing inside her. Lost in thoughts of baby booties and blankies she didn't hear the knock on her door or the person enter when she didn't answer.

"Tohru? Are you still awake?"

Tohru pulled herself away from her thoughts and sat up looking at Kyo. It wasn't abnormal for him to come in and talk to her at night when everyone else was asleep. It had become sort of a routine for them. "Yes I'm awake. Come in and sit down Kyo."

Kyo closed the door and went and sat down beside her. "I'm sorry about how I talked to you earlier. I was just worried when we didn't find you in here asleep."

"Oh no Kyo its okay. Really. I shouldn't have just left without telling someone first. I just didn't want to bother anyone."

"Tohru you wouldn't have been bothering anyone. We all care about you. I…"

"You what Kyo?"

Tohru noticed something about Kyo seemed different. He had his head turned away and she could see a blush on his cheeks. Her own cheeks heated up when he took her hand.

"Tohru I know I'm the last person in the world you would think that could feel this way for you but I…" He took a deep breath before he continued. "I…uh…care about you a lot and I…um…I love you."

Tohru sat there in shock. He loves me? Why me? Why now? Oh Kyo…

"I fell in love with you during high school and I as always afraid to tell you because of the curse and I know that I probably should have done this differently but I couldn't hold it inside any more. Its been burning in me for so long, driving me freaking crazy, that I just had to tell you. I know you probably don't feel the same way and why would you when you could have someone as perfect as Yuki but at least now you know."

He made to get up and leave but Tohru grabbed his arm. After looking at her uncertainly he sat back down and hung his head so his hair hid his face. Tohru didn't know what to say so she sat there in silence while she tried to form her words. She, too, had loved him for so long but he was a person who didn't believe he could be loved because he felt like he didn't deserve it so instead of telling him and being rejected in his disbelief she had kept quiet and held her secret love for him close to her heart. But how could she tell him now after what had happened to her and with a baby coming. She was afraid he wouldn't want her anymore if he knew. I don't know what to do? What do I say to him? I can't bring him into all of this. It's not fair to him at all.

"Tohru?"

Tohru couldn't take the sadness in Kyo's voice. She knew he was expecting her to reject him. She knew it wasn't fair to hold on to Kyo when she had so much to deal with now but she couldn't do to him what he feared the most. She said the only thing her heart wanted her to say.

"Kyo…I love you too."

He lifted his head to look at her his eyes shining with tears she knew he had been trying hard to force away but now instead of tears of sadness and rejection his tears glimmered for love…love for her and though she felt guilty she was happy to know that he loved her.

Tohru felt her own tears falls, tears of love and guilt, as Kyo wrapped his arms around her and hugged her as she had wished a thousand time he would do after the curse had been broken. She just hoped that when he finally realized the truth that his arms would still hold her.