InuYasha struggled to sleep as the war between his pride and the yearn for seeing her took place inside of him. The half demon had seen it happen times enough to know exactly how it would go.

He would end up at her window the same way he had done every single time before.

It had begun — just like everything else about them, it seemed — unpretentiously and unexpectedly that grew into something as natural as the tides: he couldn't explain how or why, but it existed and there was no restraining it.

All InuYasha knew when he went after her that first night was that Kagome used to spend damn too much time on the other side of the well for his liking and he had developed the frustrating tendency of getting apprehensive whenever she wasn't around.

An impulsive act was all it took for him to caught himself petrified outside her window, too late then to turn back, too late at night to demand that she went back with him. Although the half demon had no idea of what to do at the time, he knew what he wanted, and it was nothing more than to be with her.

To this day, InuYasha couldn't tell how he had conjured the courage to ask her to stay, but it was a good thing he did, for she had allowed him to and he had been showing up at her window ever since.

It was a relieving feeling, knowing she was safe and sound under his protection even if her era had proven itself to be relatively safer than his own and the girl had toughen up as time went by. He just couldn't help it, mostly because the brutal truth was that he missed her. Completely and truthfully missed her.

Maybe she knew it. Maybe that was the reason why she never questioned him about it, but has always left the window wide open afterwards. Maybe she missed him too. The thought alone could still make something deep inside his stomach melt in the most delightful way.

There was something endearing about sharing this secret — and her bed, for that matter — with Kagome. Not that InuYasha had a problem with sleeping on the floor, but the girl made such a big deal out of it that he finally gave in and in spite of his initial embarrassment, he certainly wasn't going to complain about it.

The whole thing went without saying. She left, he followed. Simple as that. And InuYasha enjoyed simple, he could do simple. But simple never lasts. Of all people, he should be the one with this lesson engraved deep inside his head.

Now "complicated" didn't even begin to cover it and his frustration increased with every breath he took. In any other day, at this very moment, they would be together and he could actually sleep instead of just closing his eyes and pretending to.

His friends didn't seem to be striving against the same problem — as their slow, deep breaths made abundantly clear, they had long ago fallen asleep. Good. InuYasha knew pretty well the reason of his insomnia was five hundred years away and he could easily spend the rest of his bad mood without anybody reminding him that, thank you very much.

Their earlier speech about how he should go to Kagome and make things right between them had actually annoyed him into doing the opposite. Of course they would take her side, they always do — which is mildly irritating, to say the least, but the hanyou was used to it by now.

Unwilling to stay at Kaede's hut any longer, InuYasha decided to go for a walk, hoping to clear his mind somehow. The hanyou got out to the clouded night, not caring slightly for the drizzle that welcomed him. Before realizing it, he was walking the path that would take him to Kagome and sooner than the expected, there he was at her window again, just like he knew he would.

Now the half demon wished he hadn't come, because for the first time in what seemed to be forever, the window was closed. The rain on her side of the well had been falling for a long while, InuYasha could tell as he let it soak him head to toe, watching the water bath the glassy surface that viewed to her room.

Maybe it's because of the rain, a little, pathetic voice in his head tried to argue and it almost made him suppress a scornful laugh — the half demon thought he had sealed away that side of him long ago. Hope was a treacherous thing to have.

Still, he tried to open the window, fiding then that it was locked. The ghost of something highly unpleasant formed in his throat and he unsuccessfully tried to swallow it. So Kagome didn't want him to come. Fine.

From outside he spotted the miko lying on the bed, but the rain prevented him from knowing either she was awake or not. Intending to enter, check on her and leave before she even suspected he went there, InuYasha tried his best to unlock the damn thing without breaking it into pieces, which he was very tempted to do.

"Fuck!" He let out through clenched teeth when it became obvious the gentle approach wasn't working.

The hanyou was about to give up when the delicate silhouette of the girl slowly walked towards him, stopping only when they were face to face. For an excruciating moment, InuYasha thought that would be all, but as it turned out, Kagome always had a way of surprising him. The sound of a click made itself heard above the incessant rain, her eyes never leaving his while she lifted the structure open.

Silently, the black haired girl turned away. InuYasha sneaked inside, the warmth and familiar smell of the place involving him right away.

"So…" InuYasha began, whilst Kagome headed to the bed. She had been crying and he took no pride on how obvious it was to him after having seen it so many times — and even less pride on being the reason behind her tears. "You lock the window, now?" The half demon regretted the accusing tone as soon as the words came out of his mouth.

InuYasha turned back to close it himself, muffling the rain and the world outside. She sat on the bed, eyes on her lap as he followed.

"I didn't think you would come."

"Well, I'm here, aren't I?" It was a good thing they used to keep their voices down when in her room because he would be shouting his exasperation otherwise. Although InuYasha doubted it was necessary this time. He could hear her grandpa's thunderous snoring and Sota entertained with that strange box of his. Her mother wasn't home.

"You don't have to be if you don't want to."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Kagome looked him straight in the eyes this time, no space for ambiguities.

"You know what it means." And as a matter of fact, he did.

"I went to see her and we talked, so what? It ain't like we get all over each other the way you and that pathetic excuse of wolf do." Kagome stood up and he involuntarily took a step back.

"That's totally different." The very idea she actually believed that was hilarious and outrageous at the same time.

"How, exactly?" But he knew the difference, at least for him. It was different because Kagome didn't have to smell someone else's scent on him for hours until it would fade away. It was different because she didn't have to sit and watch as someone else promised to give him everything she couldn't.

"I'm not in love with Koga, for starts." Despite the relief her statement gave him, InuYasha shook his head.

"It's not like that." It felt like it didn't matter how hard InuYasha tried to do the right thing by Kikyo and Kagome, he just kept failing both of them and he knew it.

"Oh, please! You kissed her once. I was there."

"That was before-" Before I realized how madly in love I am with you. The unsaid words lingered there, an invisible barrier between them that he knew he shouldn't cross.

"I don't care when it was! This isn't about Kikyo and it isn't about Koga, either. It's about you lying to me."

"I only lied because I knew you would make a big deal out of it. You always do."

"I wouldn't make a big deal out of it if you didn't give me reasons to." She stared at him with defiance, their heavy breaths filling the air before they become too aware of their noses almost touching. Kagome was the first to look away. "I'm tired of having the same fight over and over again and I'm sick of feeling the way I do whenever there's shinidamachu around. So if you want to go, just go. I won't ask you to stay."

"And what if I wantto stay?" Kagome blinked slowly, arms crossing and lips slightly trembling.

"Then don't lie to me again. And stop dripping on my floor." Convinced they were going to be alright, InuYasha paced to the bathroom as silent as possible, barely able to hide his smile.

Once there, he stripped off the suikan — there wasn't much he could do for the soaked piece, anyway — and with the aid of a fluffy fabric, started to dry himself.

InuYasha was remarkably familiar with good part of her modern utensils by now, specially the ones that composed her scent. The first aid kit, the strange bottles he still hadn't figured out what were for, the red little stick that makes her lips smell like strawberry and leaves him dying to steal a taste.

Everything about it, just like in her bedroom, was so impossibly Kagome it was both intoxicating and a constant reminder he was the only thing there that didn't fit.

When he came back, the lights were off and she was already under the covers. InuYasha closed the door and stood there, uncertain of what to do next. He still owed her an apology.

"Are you dry yet?" She sounded sleepy by the minute, so he opted for skipping the question.

"I'm sorry, Kagome."

"It's okay."

"No, I mean it. I will never lie to you again, I swear."

Kagome moved the blanket away to reveal what has been implicitly established as his side of the bed, a peace offer that he gladly took. Sometimes, when the moon abandoned him to his own fortune, it was the only way he would allow himself to rest and on the nights he was really lucky, she would call his name on her sleep. Whenever he laid there beside her, it didn't feel unfitting at all. It felt like belonging.

There was one thing missing, though, and he waited for it.

"Still mad at me, aren't ya?"

As if she could read his mind, Kagome sighed before curling up with him, head nestling against his chest — right over his heart — and InuYasha hoped one day she discovered every erratic beat was just for her.

"I'm always mad at you."

"I ain't fightin' you on that."

He felt more than saw her smile — which only caused his own — and as InuYasha relished on the feeling of having her so close, time passed by unnoticed until Kagome spoke again.

"InuYasha?"

"Yeah?"

"Why do we keep making this so much harder than it needs to be?"

InuYasha contemplated the question for a while. Ultimately, he narrowed it down to one logical conclusion.

"It wouldn't be us otherwise."

"I guess you're right." Was the last thing she said before drifting to sleep.

As much as he wanted to pretend the whole universe came down to those four walls, InuYasha wasn't naive. He knew she deserved better than anything he could possibly offer her, that they belonged to different worlds, that departure was inevitable. And he knew the day would come when she wouldn't open the window anymore.

"But until then…" His eyes closed and he let himself sink into her hair, lips brushing against the black strands, her sweet scent inviting him to relax toward the peaceful torpor of slumber and not for the first time when holding Kagome in the darkness of her room, InuYasha wished for the sun to forget to raise.