"Mmm, you're going to be late for your own birthday party," Jared told me sleepily. His soft fingers swirled around the palm of my hand as I lay motionless, resting on his muscular arm. I was so comfortable, the thought of having to get out of bed for my party had never been more repulsive.

Tonight was going to be perfect. I didn't even care who came or who they're with or what they were wearing. It was my birthday tonight and all I needed was Jared, Serena and my family. I had changed so much since high school. I was selfish, insecure and a complete bitch, I didn't have friends, I had followers with the exception of Serena. Jared changed me. He was so different, he wasn't born with wads of money, he was kind hearted and always thought the best in people. I didn't deserve someone like him. "Come on Bambi, I know how much time you take to get ready," he said lifting me up carefully.

"Bambi?" I asked. I looked up at him and raised my eyebrow.

"You're cute and clumsy," he grinned and kissed my head.

"I am not clumsy!" I glared into his emerald eyes playfully. He started to laugh and pushed me off the bed; I stood quickly and aimed a pillow right at his head.

"I'm sorry!" he laughed. I put the pillow down and continued to get dressed, scanning the glamorous purple dress one more time. "I wish that dress was white," he said as he picked up the pillows from the floor.

"It will be," I replied as I slipped on the dress gently, it was a perfect fit. I tied my hair back into an elegant bun with a few curled strands of hair hanging down, now for the jewellery. I opened the top draw and the first thing I saw was the necklace Chuck bought me for my 18th birthday. I suddenly found myself being unable to breathe or move, it was still as beautiful as the first day he put it on me.

"What is it?" I felt Jared come towards me, I shut the draw quickly and closed my eyes.

"It was nothing," I snapped. "Shouldn't you be at Nate's getting ready?"

"Um, yeah, I'll see you later then?" He replied awkwardly making me feel even guiltier.

"Have fun," I kissed him quickly and tried to smile. Smooth B, I thought to myself.

I had thought more about Chuck in the past 24 hours than I ever had in 6 years. He was unimportant and irrelevant.

Arriving at the party was surreal. Floods of people were gathered to celebrate my birth and most of them I'd never even spoke to. After my encounter back at the penthouse with the necklace, I wasn't feeling up to a party, but at midnight tonight, I would be 25. Today was my day.

"Miss Blair!" I heard Dorota call from beside me. "I hope this is okay?"

"The party? It's perfect," I kissed her on the cheek. The lighting was purple, pink and purple ribbons and banners smothered the room, a net of balloons covered the entire ceilings and everyone looked like they were having a excellent time.

I saw Serena and Dan talking to Jared, at first I hesitated to move but I knew I couldn't avoid everyone all night. "Blair!" Serena hugged me cheerfully. Dan gave me a simple nod and a smile, we may not have been good friends but if he was good enough for Serena, he was good enough for me. "The party's great," she said.

"It was all Dorota," I replied. I felt Jared hold me from behind, I turned to face him and kissed him on the cheek. I could literally slice the awkwardness in half. "Are you okay?" I asked him to break the ice.

"I'm fine, are you?" he answered.

"Yes. Drinks?" I walked away towards the bar without even listening to his answer. "Something strong please," I told the bartender. Jared appeared beside me and looked at me strangely.

"Blair what's wrong?" he asked, frowning.

"I don't know! I just... You're too good for me. You're Jared Ramsey, the good one," I replied, I probably wasn't making any sense.

"I'm not Chuck Bass without you," I heard. Flashbacks suffocated my mind.

"Excuse me?" I frowned as my heart beat quickened. "What did you just say?"

"I said I'm not Jared Ramsey without you, Blair Waldorf," he frowned back at me. I couldn't stop staring, I was going insane. I was hearing things now? "You're present is in your old bedroom at your mother's house. Open it at midnight and come back to me when you're not acting weird. I love you," he told me. I was still static from what just happened. I was crazy, I had to be.

I turned to face the crowd laughing and having fun. I couldn't hear anything; it was like everything was going in slow motion. I downed the drink the bartender gave me in one, I started to feel dizzy and I almost staggered to the exit. I shoved open the heavy fire door, feeling the cold November air hit my face like a bullet. My legs felt like jelly, I had to sit on the cold concrete floor before I fell over. What was happening?

I'm not Chuck Bass without you. But everywhere I went, you caught up with me, so I had to come back. I love you too. Next time you forget you're Blair Waldorf, remember I'm Chuck Bass and I love you. You carry people, you carry me.

All of these flashbacks I was convinced I had forgotten started to come back all at once. I blamed the necklace. It can't have been anything else because I hated Chuck. I loved Jared. That is how it had been for years, I wasn't about to change it.

"Birthday girl what are you doing out here?" I heard Serena ask shocked. She sat behind me and put her arm around me, seeing that I was almost crying. "What's wrong, B?"

"I'm having a Chuck related panic attack," I replied, burying my head in my hands ashamed.

"Why have you suddenly been thinking about Chuck?"

"I don't know! I saw the necklace he gave me for my 18th in my draw and it just brought all of these memories back. I hate him Serena, I really do," I told her wiping my eyes.

"I've been looking for you for hours, everyone was worried," she informed me. Had it been hours? I looked at the clock. It was 11:47pm and 13 minutes before my birthday. I had to go back inside and get this over with.

"What's wrong with me?" I was going insane, that's what.

"Chuck was a huge part of you. You loved him and he betrayed you. It's okay to miss him sometimes, it's normal. There's nothing wrong with you, you're human," she assured me, she smiled at me with those big blue eyes and hugged me, pulling me up.

"Did you make things right with Dan? I tried to change the subject.

"Yes, we're okay again. They're starting the countdown in a minute so you better get back inside!" she pushed me inside, linking me close. The room's attention was instantly on me, smiles and mimes of "Happy birthday!" spread across the crowd.

"10... 9... 8... 7... 6... 5... 4... 3... 2... 1... HAPPY BIRTHDAY BLAIR!" The whole crowd shouted. I searched the room for Jared and finally caught his gaze. He lifted his glass to me and nodded; I smiled back at him and instantly started to run towards my old bedroom in my mother's house.

I was sure there had never been this many stairs. I finally reached my bedroom door; I stood still outside and held my breath, closing my eyes tightly. I turned the door knob and slowly pushed it open. My room still smelled the same, it smelt of new clothes and flowers, exactly how I left it. I opened my eyes, and right at that moment I was confident my insanity got the best of me, or I had opened a door leading to the past.

Chuck Bass stood beside my bed with his hands in his pockets, wearing one of his famous purple suits. "Happy birthday Blair," he said.