I was certain that what I had just experienced had been a product of my own somnolence and disregard of social tradition, but I couldn't help but feel irritated at my mother's interruption, I was having a quite pleasant exchange with the beloved voice in my head after all.

I had no time to ponder on what we had just discussed though, for my little cousins wasted no time into making me their very own personal dressing toy for the rest of the evening as soon as they saw me, effectively blocking any abstract thinking from my mind. Upon arriving home, I was more tired than I would have liked or expected to be that night, and after dragging my feet to my room, I just looked into my dressing table's mirror, groaned at the tangled mess my long teal hair had become, and flopped myself into bed right after changing out of formal wear. But this beautiful voice did not leave my thoughts for many days after; for being a production of my own mind, I had to admit that it had proven to be a very vexing conversation, it gave me something to reflect on. Unknowingly, something began to change inside me ever since that day.

We seldom visited the old mansion, so I did not really have much opportunity to make acquaintances with the voice in the garden again, which I admit filled me with a small amount of despair. What we had discussed had been so wilfully taken out there, and yet it seemed to be terribly spot on relating to my current daily thoughts. I had recently become seventeen, and while I accept that at this age one is probably overridden with disruptive hormones and self-centered ideas, it was my belief that I was a bit more mentally listless than most of my peers.

As a single child, I enjoyed my parent's attention all to myself, I was terrible at sharing and grew up as a conceited girl up until puberty. By the time I was in middle school I was sent off to a swell academy for girls in the city, where I learned what not being the center of attention meant, which led to me throwing insufferable tantrums over the phone with my parents. Thankfully they made no heed of my ranting at that time, and I started learning what being in society meant. I realized there are certain patterns of behavior one should follow in order to be accepted, and discovered the joys of being popular among my companions.

That was when my gloomy personality began to develop though. I found myself to be an excellent actress, and really stood out in the acting club, which I very much enjoyed attending, being required to have varied personalities and perform with different artistic masks, all for the sake of entertainment. I applied this to my daily life as well, I enjoyed acting like a different person according to the situation and people present at a time. It may sound weird, but I found it interesting how one could have different ways of acting and still feel natural about it, and the reactions of people to one's different personas are something that never seizes to amuse me even up to this day.

The thing is, it is then when I realized how shallow life was, how easy it was to acquire whatever you desired, at first I thought I had found a most valuable secret of life and was overjoyed at the thought of having the world at my feet, but I soon found myself growing apathetic. I willed myself to still act properly most of the time, but I grew more and more troubled as I began thinking of my living as something horribly superficial.

I figured a good solution would be to become a more virtuous person, so I strived to acquire some sort of genius of any kind, wolfing down books and engaging in varied cultural and sportive activities, which served to effectively distract me and become happier up until my entrance to high school. By then I was given the luxury to choose the school I wanted to attend and I picked the same my best friends had, if only to keep acquaintances, or to have some sort of social security I suppose. Both my parents received wonderful proposals from international business companies though, and I soon found myself changing schools almost as often and conveniently as I changed my acting.

We eventually settled down somewhere in the west, where I found myself to be liked as much as in any other place I had been before. The constant travelling I had done made people even more curious about befriending me, and I had no trouble getting accepted into popular social circles again. All of these delightful situations made me more aware of the feelings and ideas I had back in middle school though, and I found all the dandy things in life I had just lived to be dense once again. The issue now, was finding meaning to life again, I was starting to feel plastic and uninspired, the more I read, the more I engaged in art and society I tried to be, the more depression broke its way into my mind. I tried blaming it on my age, on the media and on the influences of people in my life, but I understood I had to resign and let patience be my friend, surely inspiration would find its way again.

So I became a full time actress, playing whatever role was convenient at all times, despite my lack of will, I found joy and solace in art and in the exploration of new emotions and activities. I picked up music and literature as my new sanity guardians, whenever I would feel troubled I had them at my disposal to unplug and reset my mind and heart as many times as necessary, even though a distress would always stay at the back of my head.

I admit part of me was heavily disappointed in myself. It was a ridiculous duality sometimes, the need to break out of life's order opposed to the need to fit in society, made me feel hypocritical at times, luckily I knew better than to engage in self-loathing. That's why the voice in the garden invaded my thoughts with more than just adoration for its melodic beauty, the little words she spoke broke through my carefully crafted ideals like bullets on paper, it seemed as if she had the answers I yearned for, and knew how to inject sense back into my existence. I was so enthralled by this new ideas and emotions that I did not foresee how much a mad girl I was to become in the following days.

Days had gone by quite uneventfully, and while I did not forget about my conversation with the garden's voice, I kept performing my daily activities as if my mind was not overloaded with her affirmations. Then one Friday, during the practice of a new play for school, I received a call from my mother, asking me to go straight home after I was done with club activities. It upset me slightly that I would not be able to go out with my friends, as I had already made plans for earlier that day, but I had to excuse myself anyway to attend to whatever my mother would need me for, it would have had to be important for her to call during what would still be considered school hours after all.

"Oh that is terrible, I had planned on taking you to a very special place this afternoon after hanging out with the guys" said my current study subject, or boyfriend, with a very disappointed face.

"We can always do that later, don't worry about it" I said, using a sweet tone. "I'm sure the place won't move, let us schedule it for tomorrow, yes?"

"I'm afraid it would be a little difficult" said him, accompanying his affirmation with an exasperated movement of his hands. "You see, to be honest, I doubt you would be allowed to go to such a place without an incredibly smart excuse."

"Wow, you make it sound so terribly shady, just where did you want to go?"

He nervously looked to the side for a bit. "Well, I had wanted to use hanging out with our friends as an excuse to not tell your parents where I was taking you." A somewhat smug smile presented itself on his lips as he turned to look at me and hold my hands. "We have been together for about a month now haven't we? It surely would be nice to know each other better wouldn't it? So I was thinking," he shuffled his navy blue hair a bit awkwardly "maybe you would like to visit me?"

"Visit you where darling?" I had a feeling I knew where this was going, but feigned ignorance nonetheless.

He winked at me in what I considered a stupid fashion. "Why, the place where the magic happens of course." His room.

I just stared at him, my countenance devoid of expression. As much as I found him to be very charming, he proved to be no different from any other I had dated on a curious whim before. He had joined the acting club and caught my attention by performing quite delightfully, made me think that perhaps I had found a poetic soul that would share fancy views and artistic entertainment, he was also quite good looking, so when he asked me out I accepted out of pure intrigue and amusement. But as days went by, he had shown himself as nothing but a regular popular guy, if only his affectations were entertaining when he spoke, I was already disappointed even before he had suggested sleeping with him, his proposal only making me find him absolutely uninteresting right then.

"Oh, sorry Kaito, I'm afraid I will have to decline" I said, freeing my hands from his grasp.

"Oh don't be like that! Miku you know I find you crazy gorgeous! See, you are upset now. Dearest I swear I would be most gentle with you. Besides, ask any girl I have dated before you, the ones I am still friends with will tell you, I am quite great at it you know" he added with what I found to be a sleazy smile.

"I don't want to sleep with you." I replied.

His face fell in annoyance and confusion. "Then, why even date me at all?"

"I did not know that's all there was to relationships."

"Don't be so irrational, of course not, but it is not too soon you know, sexuality is after all, an important part in a relationship. I'll fill the bed with rose petals, what do you say?" So dense.

I was trying really hard not to let annoyance slip into my tone. "Sorry, I really don't want to."

"Well okay, I understand, I can wait a little longer, you are worth that much." He said grabbing my chin and leaning in for a kiss, a kiss I did not want as I turned my head away. "Unless you mean like, never."

I did not answer and just looked at him, I couldn't help but feel a little guilty, the guy was not exactly ill intentioned but I just did not have such interests, I did reflect on what he had said earlier though, why did I even start dating him at all? I had just irresponsibly decided to entertain myself with a high-school relationship.

"I see. I'm sorry Miku, you are a really great girl, but this is something important for me, I don't think I want a relationship like that. I just hope you don't think me shallow, please understand" he said, with a bit of sadness on his eyes.

"I understand." I had to let out a sigh I had been containing before continuing. "Sorry to have made you waste your time."

He looked a bit shocked but just nodded and turned away, I looked at my phone's screen and saw it was already time for students to go home, muttered a good bye and left for my house. I was a bit disappointed in the whole situation, but as much as I was upset at him for having considered me a potential sexual entertainment thing, I was annoyed at myself as well, having jumped into yet another relationship out of boredom, possibly hurting the guy a bit. I quickly dismissed the whole situation like I did with most things in life I disliked though, couldn't be helped now, I was sure he would be alright.

I arrived home and greeted my mother with a kiss on the cheek and looked at her in expectation, surely she had something to discuss, and I had been a good girl and came home right away just as she had asked me to do, just to listen to whatever she would say.

"How was school dear?" She asked with a pleasant smile before saying anything else.

"Good, the play is coming along quite well."

"Surely they gave you the main role again right?"

"You know me" I smiled and replied, just by the book.

"Of course." She laughed a bit and continued. "Oh dear I'm sorry, I'm going to have to ask you to cancel your activities with the acting club though."

"Why is that?" I said furrowing my brows.

"We are moving yet again" she said with half a smile, half a sigh.

"Oh."

"I'm sorry, I'm sure you had settled here already, and here we are, already moving so soon."

"That's quite alright" and convenient I supposed, Kaito and I shared too many friends after all, it would have been awkward among some social groups. "Where are we moving?"

"Your father and I looked into making some investments in the countryside, where the old mansion is at. There are some really promising industries there, but the deals and administration require our presence quite a lot. So we are living in the mansion, at least that part is exciting no?" She smiled as she said all this, but then changed to a condescending tone and look. "I'm sorry, surely you will miss your friends, and your boyfriend."

"We broke up." I said, not with the accustomed sadness I would have usually acted with, my mind more concerned on taking the new information.

"Oh. I'm sorry dear" She condescendingly said.

"That's okay. The mansion you said? Is the thing not falling apart though?"

"We have already made arrangements to make it perfect for when we arrive. There is also a really nice private school there, I think you would like it, they make art of real importance, they also teach French and Italian. We already enrolled you there, but as always, you are free to find another school should that one not be of your liking"

"I see, sounds good mother. When are we leaving?"

"Tomorrow. Sorry dear, I know it's sudden, don't worry though, the place has already been remodeled, old furniture has been changed and basic electronics installed already."

"Mother, what about the garden? Please tell me you kept it as it was" I pleaded. I had become a little scared when she said the place had been remodeled, part of my acceptance of such a sudden change was the fact that she was going to be there, I could just feel it, and my heart beat wildly upon this realization.

"I know it is your favorite place, it has been left untouched" she assured me.

"Great!" I smiled, genuinely. "Well then, if you'll excuse me, I'll start packing my most basic belongings then."

"Certainly dear, the rest will be taken there by a moving agency in the following days."

My mind was going crazy, it was a bit upsetting to leave the city yes, but the mere thought of hearing that voice again, of being enveloped by that warm feeling again had me absolutely overjoyed. I smiled at the recognition of my own feelings, I found them funny and silly, getting so excited over something that I had probably just dreamt. But no, it was perfectly understandable for me to be like this, it was after all, the promise of discovery, I knew my melancholy would go away upon listening to her again. I laughed at the thought of being in love with an affectation of my mind, but as I was right then, there was nothing I could find most becoming. I was sure that I would find solace in that garden, and my whole being overflowed with happiness at this knowledge.