I am proud to announce that this story has gained zero attention. It's not because I published it literally 5 minutes ago, but it is because you all are uncultured swine who have no idea what art is. Waaaah. I will now post one chapter every day instead of two like I was planning.

Lorenzo and Bob were running down Route 1 from absolutely nothing.

"Zoey!" Bob yelled. "What are we running from?"

"I don't know!" Lorenzo yelled back. "And my name's not Zoey!"

Lorenzo tripped on something and fell face first into the ground.

"What was that…" Lorenzo said. He got up and looked to the possible cause of the fall.

A very agitated packet of salt was looking up at Lorenzo while holding a-.

"O boi i cant wqait toi c pascket of salut kik the creap oht of lorenzzzo," the idiotic realepearson said, typing away at his windows 95 computer with 19 different types of malware installed. "Packert of salyt wil lik wip out onm e of dos dings thagt loook like a couch and sholot lowenzo in his dumb face ecks deee."

Before the ignoramus could type his sentence one finger at a time while simultaneously using the other one to beat up a piece of steak, a portal ripped open and a tiny Russian boy walked out of it.

"Mmmmmmmmmm hwo r u ecks dee getg ogut me swampo ecks dee io will cqall n paqwlice eclks dee," realepearson said.

"Hello, I am Misha, supreme lord of the ratings on FanFiction," the identified Misha said. "I make sure no one ever violates the ratings they put on the fanfiction. As you may or may not know, you rated this as K+, and you definitely shouldn't talk about guns. I, supreme lord of the ratings on FanFiction. Failure to comply with me will result in termination of your account and all of your works."

"Ye gyz i dont no wot temrinate meanms i thiknk itb mesans congratulkations in anlother lanngige eckd de," realepearson said very stupidly. "Ye ik gteg congrayulations for beeing savige and dab on h8rs ecks dee so i wil chang myt name 2 michale p ecks dee bhyut i spoel it as micheal p ecks dee juts like jake paul savage ecks dee rofl.'

"Seeing as though you will eviscerate my sanity, and that the tiny children most likely won't remember me as a character because I am so bland and unoriginal, I will instead put a much more memorable pokemon to censor your fanfiction, and one that is edgy to appeal to the edgelords on FanFiction," Misha said, surprisingly logical for a 7 year old.

Misha then began to whistle and a tiny black and red fox came out of a portal.

"Death comes," the surprisingly edgy fox said. "I, Shadow Night Darksman Edgier the IV, shall keep track of and censor any malevolent form of language not suitable for a juvenile audience."

"Very well, then," Misha said. "I now make my leave." Misha then jumped out the window and flew into the sun.

"Okmg edgine ss overlad ,KBI GFJLKFSaKshllksrjgliudhyfmfjungnnmb dfbnksdnskldkfjlKJREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEElkjengwnrgk gnkehngndsm,v kansl/nglskRFbn," Micheal raged. "Okay guyz subsrib to mi utub cannel micheal_p ecks dee i plehy ohbby for su-"

"I, Shadow Night Darksman Edgier the IV, interrupt your statement to declare that you were in fact about to say what is said to be a curse word," Shadow Night Darksman Edgier the IV said calmly.

"Okay then ecksa dee i will contin ue writn de storuy eckes dee," Micheal P said.

Back with Lorenzo and Bob, the angry packet of salt was pointing a gu-, I mean magic wand of vanishing towards Lorenzo. I am very worried for Lorenzo.

"Hands up boi," the packet of salt said. "Breathe and I will shoot. You breathed! Okay then I will sho- cast a magic spell of vanishing upon you."

The bul-beam of magic shot out, but Lorenzo stepped out of the way very easily and threw a pebble at the packet of salt. The packet of salt was hit with the pebble and suffered a massive concussion.

"ACKACKACKACKACKACK," Packet of salt cried out in agony. He then proceeded to write his last will and testament, entitling everything he owns to his 4 year old son who lives back at the safety of McDonald's.

'Tell my children I love them," Packet of salt said as he coughed up salt and soon stopped living.

"What was the purpose of that scene?" Bob asked Lorenzo. "I mean, I didn't even have to do anything. That dude wasn't even a pokemon. Was it supposed to introduce the edgy censor and the idiotic author?"

"Author?" Lorenzo asked? "And scene? And when did we meet an edgy censor and an idiotic author? You're talking like this is all some story."

"Now you're acting out of character or OOC," Bob said. "You're supposed to be a cocky, arrogant, whiny child. Stop acting like a normal human being."

"Hey Bob, do you see that thing in the sky?' Lorenzo asked.

Bob looked up and noticed a giant rock in the sky and didn't step out of the way in time. He wasn't affected by the weight of the rock and instead crawled out and under it as liquid.

"Now who's rude enough to drop a giant rock on me?" Bob asked, a rhetorical question.

All of a sudden a hispanic man came running at them at high speeds and stopped right in front of him.

"I am Julio and I have been hired to remind you not to break the 4th wall," he said. "I will drop more boulders on you if you continue. I now make my leave."

He then hopped in his sombrero alien ship and flew to the United States. His ship was promptly blown up by the FBI.

"THAT'S IT!" Lorenzo yelled. "WE HAVE TOO MANY DISTRACTIONS. NOW WE WILL SPRINT TOWARDS VIRIDIAN CITY."

Lorenzo started running as fast as he could towards Viridian City, a groundbreaking distance of two feet.

"Now we challenge the gym here and get our first gym badge!" Lorenzo excitedly said.

"Seems like a nice plan," Bob commented. "But isn't this the last gym people usually fight when they challenge the league?"

"We are no ordinary trainers, and we have lost no times!" Lorenzo conceitedly said. "Whatever-his-face is won't stand a chance against us!"

"We haven't won any times either," Bob said. "But if you want to see your dreams get crushed, I won't stop you."

"Okay now, but we need to find the gym first," Lorenzo said. He then gandered upon the large city, resting his gaze upon a semi-large green building.

"Bob, use teleport!" Lorenzo commanded.

They both glowed a pale shade of blue and magically appeared in front of the Viridian City Gym.

"You ready?"

A/N ecls dee guyz i hop u enijyed dis chappie ecks dee i wil maek mor but njo one leav review exsept 3 reviews i wrot usin alternatge accounmt ,kgjb DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE