I don't know if this will be confusing or not, but I'll just go ahead and point out the fact that this chapter starts off in Toph's point of view, and then switches to Sokka's later. I just didn't want to label it directly, because you can't do that when writing a novel or whatever. So yeah. Enjoy.

Chapter 2: Solutions

I blinked as Sokka's words echoed through the small hotel room. I didn't know how to react. I figured it would be safest at this point just to keep quiet and let him contemplate what a moron he really was.

I mean, I had always known Sokka was stupid, but he had just revealed a whole new level of stupidity the likes of which even I have never experienced. And I had experienced some pretty stupid shit.

And while it was true that yeah, he did seem to realize he had made a mistake, I don't think he completely grasped the magnitude of the situation. He just stood there and waited for my response. His heart rate was almost freaking normal.

"Hold on. Could you repeat that?" I pretended to clean wax out of my ears for effect, flicking it away when there actually –was- some. I thought that maybe if he said it again, he would recognize how idiotic it sounded.

"Sure," he agreed, somewhat uncomfortable. "I told Suki I was going out with Ty Lee so that she wouldn't think I haven't been able to move on."

"That's what I thought you said." I shook my head. He was serious. "But in all honesty, you HAVEN'T been able to move on. Why lie to impress her?"

"Because SHE has a boyfriend now. I won't be outdone." Whoa. Suki had a boyfriend? That was fast. Not that I was surprised.

"Don't get me wrong, Sokka, I understand how you don't want to be outdone. I'm not one to be outdone myself. But Ty Lee? What the hell were you thinking?" I flicked him on the forehead for emphasis.

"Ouch," he complained. "Yeah it was stupid, but I don't think it's really as bad as you think. It's not like we're actually going out. Plus, why do you care? Are you jealous?"

I felt my face turn hot. "No, I'm not jealous. Just concerned with your safety, though I'm starting to wonder why bother." He looked confused. I elaborated for his benefit. "You have to remember it's Ty Lee we're talking about. She'll find out. And she'll take it seriously. And before you know it, you'll be living in an entirely pink house on Kyoshi Island with scads of contortionist babies."

He shuddered. He obviously hadn't thought of that consequence. I shuddered too, picturing a newborn baby doing a backbend. I briefly wondered why that freaked me out so much.

"Well," He countered, once he regained use of his vocal chords. "What was I supposed to say? 'Oh, that's great Suki. I'm so glad you're doing so well in your new relationship, because I, for one, haven't had physical contact with the opposite sex since we broke up!' My god. Of all the places, why did Aang and Katara have to get married on Kyoshi Island? If they would have chosen anywhere else, I probably wouldn't have ever had to see Suki again."

"As nice as that sounds, she probably would have been invited to the wedding regardless of its location. You would have had to deal with her either way."

I sensed him glaring at me and shrugged. "What? I'm just being realistic."

"I don't need you to be realistic right now, Toph," He said, sounding absolutely fed up. "I need you to be comforting."

"That's just not me. If you want a brainless mother figure who'll lie to you to make you feel better, find a new best friend." He winced, and I wondered if I had gone too far. "Look, Sokka. I didn't-"

"No," he interrupted. "You're right. I came to you for advice, not for comfort. Though sometimes I wish you would just get to the point instead of telling me off and letting me know how stupid I am first."

He had a point. Still, I couldn't deny myself the amusement I found in mocking Sokka. It had become a pastime, as sad as that sounds. "So yeah, I screwed up big time. That much I know," He continued. "But how do I fix it? Because I am incredibly determined to NOT have contortionist babies, if it's at all possible."

"Well, the way I see it, the only way to fix this is to go out with Ty Lee."

"Isn't that exactly what I said I don't want to do?"

"Look, you don't have to reproduce with the chick. You'll just have to go out with her and then break up before it gets too serious. That way, you won't have to admit to Suki that you lied to impress her, OR have circus babies. It's a win-win situation."

He absent-mindedly stroked the beginnings of a beard that had appeared on his chin.

"You know… That just might work!"

"What can I say? I'm a genius."

And then he did something completely unexpected. He must have been really freaking relieved to get the situation off his chest or something, because before I knew it, he had pulled me into a hug and kissed the top of my head happily. My whole body went numb, and he pulled away from me.

We spent the next few seconds standing next to each other in uncomfortable silence.

Finally, I cleared my throat.

"You should… uh, probably go now. You know. Ask her out before Suki finds out it was a lie and all that…"

"Yeah, yeah," he agreed quickly. "I'll go do that. Like, now."

And then he was gone, and I was left alone in the room, with nothing but a medley of confusing emotions to keep me company.

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At first, Toph's plan seemed foolproof. Which it pretty much would have to be in order to work. Because knowing me, if there was a way to screw it up, I would find it.

It occurred to me rather quickly that I had no idea how to actually find Ty Lee. I didn't know where she lived, how to get there, nothing. So I did the only thing I could think to do. I stood in the middle of a busy street, hoping that, by an off chance, I would see her. Smart, right? Yeah.

I'm a genius.

As I watched the assortment of busy-looking people making their way through the street, I thought about how much easier this would be if Kyoshi Island were still the quaint, quiet place it had been when I had first visited it.

After the war, when Aang began to tell stories of his journeys as the avatar, every place he ever visited became an instant tourist trap. And Kyoshi Island was one of the most popular. Lucky me. How was I supposed to find just one person in this huge crowd of people?

And then I saw her, and I remembered; she's a circus freak.

She was walking through the busy street. On her hands. Way to blend in.

With much difficulty, I managed to maneuver myself through the busy throng of people toward the one that was upside down. I wasn't sure how to get her attention. Hesitantly, I poked her bare foot, noting her freshly manicured pink toenails. She turned on her hands to face me.

"SOKKA!" She exclaimed. In one graceful, fluid motion, she fell into a backbend and stood up, on her feet this time. She threw her slender arms around my shoulders. "It's been forever!" She dragged me to the side of the road so we could converse without being trampled, which I was mostly grateful for.

"Er, yeah. I guess it has." I studied her face, wondering how someone could be so happy all the time. It was honestly nothing short of creepy. "So, I'm here for the wedding next week. And I was wondering if, maybe, since I'm here and everything, you might want to go out to dinner or something?"

I tried my best to make it sound like a casual invitation. It would make it easier for me later. Her eyes got so wide I thought they would pop out of her head.

"Seriously? Sure! Give me a place and time!" Wow, this chick was freaky. She was literally bouncing up and down on the balls of her feet.

"Uhm, tonight. How about you choose the place? I don't really know the area too well." More excited bouncing.

"Ooh! Okay, I know just the place! Meet me back here around sunset and I'll take you. It'll be a surprise!" She beamed, obviously very proud of herself.

"Sounds great. Er, I should go get ready. I guess I'll see you then."

"I can't wait.!" And with that, she snapped up into a perfect handstand and walked away.

So far, the plan was working perfectly. I just needed to survive this date, maybe a few after it, and then break up with her. Simple as that. We'd leave a few days later once the wedding was over, and I'd never have to see Ty Lee or Suki or her gay boyfriend again.

I should have known it wouldn't be that easy.