I do not own anything but my character Taylor! :)

/

It was a surreal moment sitting across from the woman he had such a colour past with... And soon to be future. He wanted nothing more than to hold her in his arms and kiss her lips, the simplest of gestures he'd been craving the entire car ride to her apartment. But first they needed to iron out the issues at hand- the real reason behind meeting up in the first place. But on the plus side, getting her out of her apartment and out to a restaurant was a start.

"You look really good," he commented, a small smile at his lips as he looked her over yet again. It was still pretty early but he couldn't deny she glowed of pregnancy ambiance, like a goddess or angel. It was the first time seeing her since she left the company and the first time he really talked to her since finding out she was pregnant. Kevin remembered that particular night like it happened yesterday- laying up shop in Sami's house, flicking through channels in search of anything mindlessly entertaining to take his mind off his life. That's when his phone vibrated beside him, surprised to even see Taylor's name on display.

He didn't expect the bombshell he got that night.

"Thanks," she mumbled, snapping him back to reality. He watched as she discreetly covered her stomach with her sweater, leaning over the table. It was something she stil felt uncomfortable with- being complimented and congradulated given the circumstances.

"So, how're you?" she attempted at small talk as they waited for their food. She settled for the water glass in front of her, again counting the ice cubes over instead of making eye contact with Kevin. It bothered him- having her look away when he'd talk or compliment her even the slightest. He wanted that cheeky grin and blush he was used to, or that smack on the shoulder like when he embarrassed her with sweet talk. He missed that.

"I'm, uh... I'm okay."

Kevin sighed, realizing his own life was one huge fucked up mess. He really wasn't okay. He'd been a wreck having lost his family, his own credibility and lover in the matter of a month's time. He was far from okay.

"I'm sorry," she sighed, able to imagine how broken Kevin felt as she felt just the same. "I'm sorry for everything."

"I am too... You don't deserve everything that's come with this. You know, all that online stuff."

That alone made her laugh. She deserved exactly everything that came her way. She didn't deserve pity- that was the last thing she even expected to happen. "Don't fool yourself, Kevin.. I deserve every last hate filled word anyone sends my way."

"No you don't," he growled. Kevin was fuming at this point. He was pissed at all of the things being said over social media by people who felt gratified enough to sit behind a computer and spit hateful shit about someone he cared for dearly.

So he fucked up... So he fell in love with another women while married with three kid and got caught- the news reaching every media outlet. He could deal with everything thrown his way from down right trolls to his faithful fans all over the world. But when it came to Taylor, he became defensive for her and the baby. "You don't deserve what those fucking people are saying about you, Taylor."

"What if I do? What if this is all in God's plan? All because I let whatever we had before happen again?"

"Are you regretting everything now?"

"Yes." Her answer made his heart fall to the floor, sucked of all its life and vibrancy. How could see regret their time together, spanning over a year and only vey recently?

"I regret ever letting you lose what you have at home because we wanted to be selfish... Again. We were lucky last time. Nobody knew a thing and we got to be the fucking scum of the earth and sneak around everyones backs. Can't you see why I regret ever being with you? It's because I care about you, and your family. They didn't deserve to lose a man like you. Morgan didn't deserve to lose a loving husband like you."

"This isn't the time for this, Taylor... I came here to talk to you about the baby and what we're going to do. I didn't come to talk about my shit end of the stick."

"It's what it is, Kevin... You can't run away from it no matter what. It'll always be there."

"I don't wanna hear it," he snapped. He didn't drive across town to discuss what they did wrong. "I wanna hear what were going to do about the baby."

"I told you, Kevin... I can't do this alone. Even if you help and spend as much time with us or the baby as you want, it won't ever be the same."

"And why's that?"

He already knew the answer to his question. He just needed to hear it from her own mouth, a confirmation. "You know why."

"Tell me."

"Because I don't get to have you right there beside me, every step of the way. But it doesn't matter anymore," she whispered, finally staring him right dead in the eyes. This time she fought the tears, more angry than anything else. Her selfish side desperately wanted

him at every baby appointment to come- picking out nursery decor and baby clothes, down to a name or two for the little one.

"I can't have you. And I don't think I can have this baby either," she revealed, her own stomach dropping as did Kevin's. That was his flesh and blood growing inside her. He already loved the little girl or boy as much as he loved his other three kids. Hearing his chances at some kinda happiness again, completely shot down hurt. It physical hurt.

"What?" he uttered. He began to doubt his hearing, wondering if maybe he heard her wrong. But she stood her ground since it was the only way to finally bury the hatchet. Giving up their baby or possibly terminating it seemed possible. Scary, but possible. It was the only way the two could move on with their lives- leaving Kevin to rebuild his broken family and trust. And for her? It was the only way she could forever and truly move on from Kevin.

"I don't want the baby... I'm sorry," she said, standing from her chair. She couldn't stay any longer, not after having revealed her true feelings of the matter. She couldn't stare Kevin in the eye, watching his every chance at being a father again crumble right in front of her. His kids were his life. He always proclaimed the sentiment, cross his heart. Now there she was, taking away his only reason for living because she couldn't handle it herself.

So she walked out of the restaurant, leaving Kevin to wallow with what was probably their last meeting ever. She didn't even dare look back, her heart in about a million pieces as she drove away in tears. It was uncontrollable enough that she pulled off to the side of the road, letting her head fall in her hands as she bawled her eyes out all the while Kevin still sat at that restaurant table, clutching onto the ultrasound picture Taylor had given him early and wondering what to do now.

He really felt like he'd lost everything now.

xxx

K: You up?

K: Taylor...

K: Whatever... I'm at your door

K: knocking

Taylor opened her tired eyes, blinking a bit till she could focus on the texts blowing up her phone. She was fast asleep but the annoying vibrating sound of messages woke her- jumping out of bed once she read the 'knocking' one.

She opened the door, Kevin on the other side like he said. "What're you doing here?" Taylor whispered.

She peered around every which way down the hall of the hotel, no one else but Kevin in sight. Pulling him into the room, she closed the door and locked it just before he led her to the bed, like she had no other option.

"I need to see you. You have no choice," he said. He'd been tossing and turning, hard to sleep knowing she had a room all to herself just a floor above his own.

"Couldn't wait till Brooklyn?"

"Nope. Plus, I couldn't sleep anyways," he said, spreading kisses all along her neck, pushing past the straps of her tank top as he explored more skin.

After their shower incident, it was like picking up where they last left off. This time around Taylor blocked out the part about his wife and kids, the burden of guilt off her shoulders and for once, in a long, long time she was actually happy.

"Come here," she whispered, pulling him into the bed.

"I forgot what it was like sleeping next you." He wasted no time in wrapping his arms around her, pulling her close. He breathed in her scent of coconut and vanilla- so familiar and such a turn on. She could feel his erection pressed against her, the idea to slowly rocking her hips back and fourth just enough to tease filling her mind.

"You're bad," he whispered, hands running down her legs, gripping between her thighs as he pressed her closer.

"I'm bad? You're the one with a hard on even before I did anything," she said, turning around in his arms. He smiled and kissed her forehead as she nuzzled into his chest, still enveloped in his arms. She missed the feeling of having someone share her bed but not as much as his arms around her.

"What're you thinking about?" She asked, staring up into his eyes.

"You... And how good you looked tonight."

"Is that the reason for that?" Taylor giggled, looking down.

"Could be," Kevin said, kissing her lips. "You drove me crazy. Didn't help my match with Ambrose was right after yours. You know how hard it is to hide a hard on in gorilla before going out in front of thousands?"

"Nope... Thank God."

"Well it sucks. It's even worse when you walk through the curtain and I'm standing right there not knowing what to do with my eyes."

"Well you have Sandra to thank for that."

"Yes I do."

Kevin placed his hands on either sides of her cheeks, pulling her in again. He missed this kind of closeness between them. It was the reason he couldn't sleep- only having slept together a few days before and skipping out on the moment they now shared.

"Kevin?" She asked, her eyes shut. She was scared to even ask what she so desperately wanted to know.

"Yeah?"

"What do you want this time around?"

He knew what he wanted but it wasn't that easy walking away from a woman he'd already built so much with. His oldest Alex would be devastated losing the picture perfect family life he was so proud of. Kevin had a lot on his plate but one thing was for certain. "You know I want you."

"But?" She asked, expecting what she already knew.

"It's complicated," he mumbled, "But I'm trying... You know it won't be easy leaving Morgan."

"I know... But do you want that?"

"I want to be with you, so if that's what I have to do then I'll do it. I was going to last time, Taylor. I was going to leave her and be with you. But I never had the chance."

Kevin propped her chin so she'd have no choice but to look him in the eye.

"I love you. There's no denying that... I've loved you this entire time we've been trying to avoid each other."

"We kind of didn't do such a great job at that, did we?" She whispered, lips curling into a faint smile.

"No... We didn't, cause I still loved you and I know you loved me. How was that going to keep us apart?"

"It didn't," she whispered, arms wrapped around his neck this time. Hearing that he basically felt the same as she did this entire time was all she needed. If it was going to take him some time till they could start fresh, then so be it. He loved her and she loved him. He wanted her and she wanted him just as bad. Time wouldn't be the death of them... It only proved they could stand whatever thrown their way.

"I love you, Kevin."

xxx

Morgan.

The name appearing on the screen of Kevin's phone made him stop dead in his tracks, just outside Taylor's apartment.

After dragging his broken self out of the restaurant, he drove all the way to Taylor's in hopes of seeing or talking to her. He couldn't leave things resolved, not like that. It would break him even more if that was even possible.

But now his wife was calling and he found himself answering that call. "Hello?"

"Hey..." Her sad voice greeted. He hated hearing her so distraught while there was really nothing he could do about it. And he caused all that pain she was feeling- all the uncertainty of their marriage, every tear that fell from her eyes. It was still heartbreaking even though he stood outside his lover's door, wanting to fix things with her.

"I think we need to talk about everything," Morgan said. A month away from her husband had taken a toll on her. "At least, I want to."

Now Kevin was conflicted. He turned back to his car, leaning against the hood as he continued to listen to his wife speak. "Come home and we can talk... I'm willing to hear you out and maybe we can move forward from this. The kids miss you... I miss you."

"I miss you too..." Kevin said, staring up at the apartment building. He didn't know what to do. He had his wife basically giving him another chance but then there was Taylor. He didn't know what she wanted anymore- she was conflicted herself. Taylor spoke about how she wanted to be with him, the only way she'd even raise the baby was being with him, as a couple... But ultimately, she was selfless. She didn't want to ruin him completely.

"Will you come home?" Morgan asked, holding out for his answer.

Kevin stepped away from the car, staring up at the apartment one last time before he gave his answer- one he still wasn't positive about.

"Yeah... Yeah I will," he said, but it still didn't sound or feel right.

"Okay... Alex has a soccer game at six. Maybe you can come here first and then we can all go together."

"Yeah, okay. I'll be there," Kevin said before she hung up, leaving him with his thoughts.

Is that what you want? To rebuild a broken foundation with Morgan and ultimately lose any chance with Taylor?

Taylor made her choice... She wouldn't have me even if I chose her.

If you go back to Morgan, it's the end of you and Taylor. For good this time.

Kevin sighed. He knew what he needed to do... But it wasn't what he wanted.

He always wanted Taylor and he always would. But given the chance of mending his family, how could he not?

He made his choice. He got right back in his car, drove away from Taylor's apartment and back home.

Where he was sure he belonged, but didn't exactly want to be.