Chapter Two: Somewhere over the Rainbow
"Rainbow Dash, you're lucky I didn't murder you for making Pinkie Pie cry, not to mention severely injuring Apple Bloom," Twilight scolded Rainbow Dash the next day when the cyan pegasus had come over to her house.
"Oh, Apple Bloom will be fine...filly can bounce back from most anything," Dash said.
Completely deadpan, Twilight countered, "she needed nineteen stitches, turns out she has a hair-line fracture in her front left leg, not to mention the painful swelling from all those bruises. The doctors say it'll be about eight-to-twelve weeks before she'll be back to normal."
"Oh...ha ha...oops..guess I overdid it a little," said Dash, rubbing the back of her head. After a moment, she added, "Okay, so Apple Bloom and Applejack I can see, but why was Pinkie even more upset then they were? She didn't even have to go to the hospital!"
Twilight sighed. "The wound that's most painful to her is the emotional one...do you know what it's like for one of your friends to think you're a psychopath?"
"Ponies call be narcissistic all the time," countered Dash.
"You shrink diagnosed you with narcissism," countered Twilight. "Besides, it shows a lack of trust to think she's trying to murder and cannibalise you...you're the Element of Loyalty, for Celestia's shake."
"Oh...yeah...I did kinda make some large leaps of logic and jumped to conclusions," replied Dash.
"Not just leaps...more like trans-Atlantic journeys in logic, and a jump worthy of the NBA to conclusions," noted Twilight. "When Pinkie is the most logical pony in a situation, you know something is wrong."
"Yeah...Pinkie's almost as retarded as Derpy..." said Dash.
"She's actually not retarded...she's very academically talented...she did graduate first in her class at Harvard when she received her doctorate in economics," commented Twilight.
"Then why is she a baker and acts like, well, Pinkie?" asked Dash, surprised.
"Firstly, the job market is kinda slow now, and Pinkie doubled majored in economics and culinary arts during her undergrad at Vanderbilt, so she got a job at Sugar Cube Corner. And she has a very bad case of ADHD...really wish she would take some medicine," answered Twilight.
"I thought you said she was a doctor?" noted Dash.
"A doctor of philosophy, a Ph.D...not a medical doctor, M.D., and she's into that 'homoeopathic' crap...'oh, vaccines cause autism'...the one study that linked vaccines to autism has been thoroughly disproved...we'll see who's foals get mumps and whooping cough," Twilight responded, getting off-topic.
"Um...sure...whatever. How am I gonna get her to forgive me?" asked Dash.
Twilight rubbed her chin a minute. "I'm not really sure," she finally said. "Last night released some emotional friendship issues...I mean, I don't mean to be condescending to Pinkie...her post-modernism just rubs my positive rationalism the wrong way sometimes."
Dash, clearly not understanding Twilight's last sentence, but the rest of the conversation, looked down with tears in her eyes. "I...sob...I really am an awful friend," she sobbed.
"Well...perhaps time will heal these wounds...and these wounds will need to be healed, so the Elements of Harmony can, you know, work in Harmony...when there's another Nightmare Moon or Discord," said Twilight.
Pinkie heard a knock at her front door. Lifting her head from the tear-soaked pillow, she considered the merits of answering. Once the initial rage over Dash's behaviour had left her, all that was left was a deep sadness at the truths she had finally admitted to not only herself, but to her friends.
Perhaps I should think you, Dashie. You finally gave my subconscious enough courage to bring the regressed truth to the surface of my mind...they really do not care for me. At best, I'm just a tool...an Element of Harmony. Besides that, I'm just some luggage they have to contend with...probably Dash coming to offer some half-arsed, insincere apology...I really don't want to deal with that...but what if it is something else? I still have a life, even without my 'friends'.
With that, Pinkie wiped her eyes and walked downstairs to answer the door, surprised at the identity of her visitor.
"Hello Pinkie, darling. How are you?" greeted Rarity. Pinkie just frowned.
"I...I do guess that is a silly question," Rarity said. "Listen, Pinkie...I know I haven't been the best friend to you...and I may not appreciate you as much as I should. I mean, without you, I wouldn't smile nearly as much. That's why it pains me to see that frown on you...it looks so unnatural on your happy face."
"Did Twilight have you come over, so Princess Celestia can have her precious Elements working?" asked Twilight, still frowning.
"No, darling! I just...what you said last night...struck a nerve in me...and...and..." Rarity could not continue. She caught Pinkie by surprised with a tight hug, followed by tears on Pinkie's shoulder.
"Oh...Pinkie...you're my friend...and seeing you so upset broke my heart. I love you so much. To think I ever cause you pain..."
"Shh...shh...there, there...Rarity. I love you, too; and I am happy you are my friend...and I absolutely, positively hate that I am making you cry right now..."
Rarity pulled up from Pinkie's shoulder and smiled at her, eyes wet.
"Oh, Pinkie, darling...we shouldn't hurt each other...we should heal each other...did you do anything for those burns on your face?" Rarity went from sentimental to practical in a sentence.
"sniff...no...I was just so upset, I really didn't notice the pain...but now that you mention it, it does hurt pretty bad," answered Pinkie.
"Well, I brought something to make that better," said Rarity.
About an hour later, Pinkie and Rarity were in Pinkie's bedroom, both with facial masks and cucumbers on their eyes. The special aloe cream Rarity had covered Pinkie's face in soothed the burning. Rarity broke the silence.
"Rainbow Dash is such a dunce," she said. "To think you, her best friend, of all ponies, would wish to kill her and make cupcakes from her...it would be a comedy if she hadn't nearly burnt your face off."
"How's Apple Bloom," Pinkie asked.
"She had to go to the hospital...her condition required many switches and a cast for a fractured leg," answered Rarity. Pinkie shook her head,
"How she can ever show her face again.." Suddenly, her front doorbell rang. Removing the cucumbers, Pinkie and Rarity went to answer the door.
"Oh, its you...aren't you afraid I'll take you to my basement and make cupcakes out of you!" cried Pinkie when she saw Rainbow Dash at her door.
"Pinkie..listen...I-" Dash was cut off my Rarity.
"No, Rainbow Dash, you listen. I believe you have caused quite enough damage. Nothing you can say can repair the damage you have done. Pinkie is the element of laughter...celestia damn laughter...and your stupidity took that away from her for a moment. Not to mention nearly killing a foal...yeah, Applejack told me what you did to Apple Bloom...what were you thinking? What threat does a little filly pose to the 'awesome' Rainbow Dash. Now just leave us alone."
Dash looked at Pinkie, who just gave her a hard stare before saying,
"Yeah, Rainbow Dash...leave before I turn you into a cupcake."
Defeated, Dash turned around and left Pinkie's door step.
The guilt and sadness of hurting Pinkie so was partially forgotten as Rainbow Dash finished her tenth bottle of apple cider at a local bar. The last couple of days had been hell for Dash, but her commitment to her weather job had kept her from seeking the drinking binge that would make her forget, if only for a night. Now, with a few days off and a pocket full of bits from payday, Dash was seeking to become so piss drunk she wouldn't remember her own name, much less Pinkie.
"Another cider, hiccup," Dash asked the bar tender.
"Listen, lady, I think you've had enough," replied the bar tender, polishing a glass.
Dash slammed the bar with her hoof. "I'll tell you when I've had enough!" The bar tender just shrugged and filled her mug with the amber liquid.
After another couple of mugs, Dash had almost forgotten about her problems when the tv surged in volume.
"Special Alert," said the news anchor. "Police report Makela St. Lewis, the infamous Ponyville Strangler, has escaped from the maximum security prison she was being held. Police warn that St. Lewis is possibly armed and extremely dangerous. All ponies are advised to keep their doors and windows locked. If you see her, do not approach. Call the authorities as soon as possible."
"Stupid tv...hiccup...I'd nearly forgotten," said Dash. With that, she threw her mug into the tv, breaking it. A minute later, a bouncer was throwing Dash out the front door.
"Aw, your tv sucked, anyway!" Dash spat out. Stumbling down the streets, a light rain began.
How appropriate...here I am, drowning my sorrows and now walking in the rain. Dear Celestia, where did my life go wrong?
I bucked up bad. How could I hurt Pinkie? That angel. That beautiful, pink angel. Stop thinking that, Rainbow Dash. You've burnt that bridge. She wouldn't give you the time of day, much less raise that flank in the air for you.
Suddenly, Dash heard a cry from a nearby alley.
"Pinkie!?" shouted Dash. Dash could remember Pinkie's scream from anywhere. The cold rain and adrenaline quickly sobered Dash as she rushed into the alley the cry had come from. Quickly, she came upon two pink earth pony. One laying on the ground, and another on top, hooves gripped around the other's throat. The face of the bottom pony was beginning to go blue as her eyes when those eyes caught sight of Rainbow Dash.
Pinkie
Screaming "RAINBOW!", Rainbow Dash flew as fast as could into the strangler, sending the strangler flying into the alley wall with a crunch. Forgetting the strangler, Rainbow Dash bent down to Pinkie. Pinkie was not moving.
Oh no...oh Celestia no...wait, what was that thingy Twilight taught me...oh, yeah, CPR.
With that, Dash bent besides Pinkie and searched for that rib bone thing and placed her hooves an inch above that and began compressions. After thirty compressions, Dash tilted Pinkie's head back, pinched her nostrils, and breathed air into her mouth two times times, and then began compressions again. After four cycles of this, suddenly Pinkie began coughing and gasping air. Opening her eyes, Pinkie smiled as she saw Dash.
Catching her breath, Pinkie said, "Dashie! You saved me!"
Grabbing Pinkie in her arms, Dash said, "Yes, Pinkie. I couldn't live if you died, especially if you died mad at me. I will never hurt you again; I'll only be the best friend I can be to you."
The rain had picked up, drenching both ponies. Pinkie's hair resembled a sponge flopping behind her, while Rainbow Dash's mane stuck around her face. The rain barely concealing the river of tears from each pony, Pinkie and Dash stared into each other eyes. A new, stronger bond had been formed between them. Their lips neared each other. Just an inch to go, the two ponies were interrupted.
"Down here is where the screaming was coming from," came a voice. Pinkie and Dash stood up as flash lights neared them.
"What happened?" asked a constable, rain running down his bright yellow rain jacket with checkers.
"I was taking this alley as a short cut home when the rain started, and from the shadows the Ponyville Strangler ambushed me and began strangling me," answered Pinkie.
"I heard the scream, so I flew down here, and sent the Strangler into that wall," Dash pointed. Another constable went over to the wall and quickly returned.
"We won't have anymore trouble with the Strangler," she reported.
"She's going to be a better prison?" asked Dash.
"Eh, not exactly...her neck's broken...she dead," responded the constable.
"That's what she deserves for trying to kill my friend," said Dash.
"Not a great loss...you saved your friend...and tax payers sixty-thousand bits a year...good job," said the colt constable.
The two were taken to the police station to answer questions for the police report, as well as for a paramedic to check Pinkie over. "Mighty lucky to be alive," the paramedic had said as she examined the bruised on Pinkie's neck. "Much longer, and you would have died. That is a good friend who not only got the Strangler off you, but also knew CPR well enough to bring you back." Pinkie just smiled at Dash.
After a couple of hours, the two ponies were allowed to go home. As it was raining, Pinkie invited Dash to spend the night with her, as Pinkie's house was closer. However, Pinkie did not alternative motives for inviting Dash. Pinkie intended to reward her savior.