A/N: Yep, two chapters in one day. There are some things I wanna get to. Enjoy!

I don't own Beautiful People or its characters

Chapter 2.

NPOV

I heard the dean call my name and was overwhelmed with the amount of pride I felt. I had done it. I had graduated from Dartmouth and done a hell of a job while I was here. I had grown, matured in ways that I never thought possible. Five or six years ago I never would have thought I would be here. But, I had done it. I knew my parents were proud of the man I had become. In all my growth, and self discovery I had come to a decision. I was moving back to the Big Apple. If I wanted to make it as any kind of writer, I had to start where I had a chance of my work being discovered. I was on the verge of spacing out, planning my next move when I heard her name.

Sophie Kerr, BA, Art History.

I knew how much photography meant to her back in the day and I was pleased to discover she had followed through with something to do with the arts. She was going to be great at whatever she decided to do with her degree, but I hoped she kept taking pictures. She had a gift back in high school and I could only imagine what years of experience had brought to her craft.

Commencement ended before I knew it, and I was making my way through the crowd. I found my parents and received the proud hugs, kisses, and pats on the back. They were beaming and we were all so happy. We were heading to dinner at Salubre Trattoria but I had a couple things to take care of before we left. I jogged ahead of them a little bit so I could get to my car and leave my cap and gown in there before hopping in with them. I was looking down, unzipping, when I ran into someone and a distinctive, soft voice exclaimed, "Ouch!"

I looked up and reached out to try to help steady whoever I had run into and froze.

She was here.

Right in front of me.

Sophie Kerr, the one that got away. I mean, yeah, I had my share of girlfriends throughout the years, but it never got past the infatuation stage. With the goals I had set for myself I didn't really have time for all that kind of drama. I was frozen, she was frozen. Neither one of us could move, but she finally recovered from the shock and asked, "Nicholas, what are you doing here?"

With all my experience as a writer I had no words to describe how she looked. Beautiful didn't cover it. She had matured, grown out of the sweet baby looks of high school and grown into a gorgeous young woman. I didn't know what she wanted to hear so I just replied with a brilliant, "Um, I graduated."

How this girl managed to still render me speechless was beyond me. I was a writer, for fuck's sake! I owned words! I liked to think I knew all of them! And yet, everything I had ever really wanted to say to her was stuck in my throat, battling it's way to the tip of my tongue where it would surely spill out as verbal diarrhea. She stood there, a toxic mix of shock, anger, embarrassment, and longing charging the air between us. By the look on her face, I'm pretty sure I was the only one feeling the longing though. And just when I thought it couldn't get any worse, I felt a hand on my shoulder and my mother's soft voice said, "Sophie, what a pleasant surprise! Congratulations!"

I turned slowly to look at my mother's face, afraid of what I would see. Yes, as a family we had exorcised our demons if you will, but I had been afraid all these years how my mother would handle running into Lynn, or any of the Kerr women. It had taken some work for her to get over her resentment of Lynn and I did not want to see a set back. It didn't matter what I felt for this girl in front of me, my mother didn't deserve that. She surprised me though. Rona Fiske was nothing if not tough as nails. She stood with her shoulders back and head held high.

Sophie, ever the polite one, replied, "Thank you Mrs. Fiske. It's quite a surprise running into you here. I had no idea Nick was a Dartmouth student."

If looks could kill I'd be dead and buried by now. Quick! Think of something! Save this moment you've been dreaming of and dreading for the last six years! And yet, I was coming up empty. My mother saved me once again and said, "Yes, well, we couldn't be prouder of him. I'm surprised you didn't know he was here?" I hadn't shared that little tid-bit of information with my mother either, who leveled her questioning gaze on me. It was a miracle I managed to keep it all under wraps for this long and it was all unraveling right in front of me. I tried to redeem myself by saying, "Yeah, well, it's a pretty crowded campus."

The death glare Sophie was shooting my way made me want to crawl in a hole and die. My father looked completely bewildered and hurt. I had kept something big from them and I didn't know how I was going to get myself out of this one. I had kept it together for the last two years and in this one moment, I was right back to looking like that over-privileged, spoiled little prick that I was when I was at Brighton. My father placed his hand on my other shoulder and said, "Well, either way, congratulations. I'm sure your parents are very proud."

The glare Sophie had fixed on me faltered and I saw something pass through her eyes. Anyone else would have missed it, but I had spent more than my share of time picturing her in my mind, remembering every nuance of her eyes and her smile like it were yesterday. There was pain there now. Something was wrong, I just didn't know what it was.

Sophie looked at my father and said, "Yes, well, I've got to get going. It was nice seeing all of you again."

I had been staring at my shoes, ashamed. At her reply my head shot up. My thoughts were screaming but I couldn't form the words. No! Don't go! Please, I've just got you back!

Who am I kidding? I didn't have her back. If anything, this whole mess had only alienated her more. I had wanted to reunite with her someday, when I felt like I really had my shit together, and this was so not how it had played out in my mind. Not only that, I had hurt the two people who cared about me the most. I didn't know how I would make this up to my parents. I had to fix it all, with my parents and with Sophie, but dammit! Why couldn't I say anything?

My mother surprised me then by asking, "Why don't you and your family join us? We're going out to celebrate and, you know what they say. The more the merrier! We'd love to have you all with us."

Flashbacks of that disastrous weekend in the Hamptons filtered through my mind at break-neck speed. I tried to detect any hint of malice in my mother's voice, but surprisingly, I found none. Could this get any worse? It was bad enough my little secret was out to my parents and Sophie, but Sophie's mom and sister? They would crucify me! Not to mention that the level of awkwardness around the table would grow to epic proportions. To make matters worse, my father, who had also determined that my mother seemed to mean no harm, was agreeing with her! I was just praying for the earth to swallow me whole at this point.

Sophie looked at my mother with her trademark sweet smile and declined once again.

"I'm sorry Mrs. Fiske, but I have other plans. I really should go."

She said "I."

Not "we have other plans."

Just... I.

My mother bowed out graciously and said, "Oh yes, of course. Please give my regards to your family. They must be so proud."

That pain was in her eyes again as she glanced away, then back at all of us and replied with a simple, quiet, "Goodbye."

She walked away.

She was walking away from me and the distance was only increasing and getting... painful. I pulled away from my parents and began frantically searching the crowd for any sign of Lynn or Karen. I figured her father would be here too and surely by now he would have found her? Someone from her family had to be looking for her and I would have seen them by now, wouldn't I?

My father fixed me with a stern look and asked, "So, Nick, mind telling us what that was all about?"

I was still searching the dwindling crowd when my father grabbed my chin, forcing me to look at him.

"Nicholas Julian Fiske, I believe you have some explaining to do."

I took a deep breath and said, "Guys, look, I'm so sorry, but I had my reasons. We were all doing so great and I didn't want the 'what-ifs' to start again. I didn't want to give the Kerr's a chance to... I don't know!"

My parents looked at each other and back at me with sympathy? What the hell was that about? Why were they feeling sorry for me?

My mother put both hands on my shoulders and said, "Oh, Nicky! I understand that you would have been scared, but all that negativity is in the past. I'm okay with the Kerr's now. Sure, I wouldn't want to be best friends with her or anything, but I could have handled knowing you were going to school with her daughter." My mom, she always managed to surprise me. Her strength was amazing. If I were in her shoes, I don't know if I could be that big of a person. I had obviously proven here that I couldn't.

My father added, "That is all in the past. I am disappointed that you kept this from us, but there's not much we can do about it now."

I nodded and then turned in the direction that Sophie had walked off in. I couldn't see her anymore and the parking area was beginning to clear out. I couldn't let her get away again! I at least had to talk to her! My breath was starting to come in short gasps. My father looked where I was looking, smiled, and said "Go get her. Meet us at the restaurant in an hour."

He didn't need to tell me twice. I took off running, hoping I would be able to catch up with her. I made it to the student parking area and began trying to figure out what kind of car she would drive. There were very few cars left, so I was just going to have to check them one by one. About ten cars into my search, I found her. If it was possible, my heart broke all over again.

She was leaned over the steering wheel of a Toyota Tercel with her face lying against her arms. Her shoulders were shaking, and her soft cries could just barely be heard outside of the closed window. No, this wasn't right. This was supposed to be a happy day and I had fucked it up for her. That's what I was good at though, wasn't it? I thought I was past the point in my life where I everything I touched turned to shit, but apparently not.

I knocked softly on the window. She jumped, turning her head toward the passenger side of the vehicle. From the movement of her hands, I knew she was wiping away tears. Once she had collected herself, she turned back to look at me through the window.

"Sophie, please, can I talk to you for a second?"

She looked out the windshield for a moment, took a deep breath, and opened the door. She slammed it shut and leaned against it, just looking at me expectantly. She took another deep breath and uttered one word.

"Explain."

I took a deep breath of my own and started, "Look, I didn't even know you were here until our junior year..."

She interrupted, "That's because I wasn't."

I waited for further explanation, but it quickly became obvious that she was going make this difficult. I deserved it.

"I just didn't know what to expect. I know things seemed okay when I left, but I didn't know how you'd react. I was just being a pussy."

God, this was not going well at all. She huffed and started in on me again.

"Are you sure that's it Nick? Or were you just scared that the big bad Kerrs were going to wreck your perfect little world again? I told you once before that I would not be your dirty little secret and that's exactly what you've made me... again!"

"Look, Sophie, you're right! Okay? I know! And it was stupid of me and I had no right to feel that way. I should have given it a shot but I was just... ugh!" I spun around and kicked the tire of her car. It kind of hurt, but I didn't care. I just needed something to take out my frustration on.

She shook her head at my display of stupidity and continued, "Well, you have nothing to worry about with my mom, so I guess these past two years have just been a waste, haven't they?"

I looked at her, then began searching the parking area again. Someone should be looking for her. Family should be enveloping her in hugs and peppering her beautiful face with proud kisses. I had a horrible, sinking feeling when I asked her, "Sophie, where's your family?"

She looked down at her feet and said, defeated, " Not here."

God, was she always this tough to get information out of? In high school, you could never shut her up. I still remember with almost perfect clarity her rambling introduction speech about big words and weird phobias on her first day. And Sophie and Karen Kerr were their mother's entire world, so where was she? Where the hell was Lynn?

"Sophie, where is your mom? Why haven't I seen her yet?"

She looked at me quickly, tears pooling in her eyes, then focused on some point out in the distance. I tried to see the point she found so interesting, hoping I would see Lynn Kerr making her way over here. There was nothing but The Green in my line of sight. Sophie said softly, "She died. It was breast cancer, two years ago. My dad died the year before that... car crash in the Rockies."

My heart dropped into my stomach. Her parents were gone. I had no idea where Karen was. I had always thought Sophie's sister was a little self centered, but missing her sister's graduation? From Dartmouth, of all places? Karen Kerr better have a damn good excuse for not being here, because this wonderful person in front of me deserved to have someone here.

"Where is Karen?"

Sophie snorted and said, "She and Ben had a location shoot in Barbados they couldn't get out of. Something about a Sports Illustrated cover or something."

I was floored. She shouldn't be alone. She was amazing and she had achieved an incredible accomplishment, yet she was on her own. I didn't think I could feel any shittier about myself. She had basically been alone for the past two years and I had been too scared to go to her. Another thing to add to my ever-mounting list of regrets where it concerns Sophie.

"Sophie, I'm so sorry. I had no idea."

Silence descended on us for a moment before she said, "Well, you wouldn't have any idea, would you? And I don't need your pity. Look, I gotta go pack. I need to be on the road by Sunday and back in my mom's apartment by Monday morning or I lose it. It was... interesting seeing you again."

She turned to open her door and I put my hand on her arm.

"Wait, can I have your number? Maybe give you a call when all this graduation stuff blows over? I... I'm moving back to New York too. Maybe we could get together for a coffee sometime?" I knew at the end that my tone of voice had risen to betray the hopefulness that I felt. I hoped against all hope that she would want to see me again.

She sighed and held her hand out for my phone. She punched her number in and looked at me long and hard, searching my eyes for something.

"Nicholas, please don't make me regret this."

A/N: Whew! That was a big one, but I'm glad that's all out of the way. Will he call her? Will she accept that cup of coffee? And don't forget, Nick still needs to break the news about Karen's death to his parents. Let me know what you think!