One Step Forward, Two Steps back

"Gale," I whisper as I stare at the handsome face of my oldest friend. I am in no way prepared to see him at this moment and have a huge mixture of emotions playing across my face all at once. I'm happy, of course, because he is my oldest friend and someone who knows me better than I feel I know myself sometimes and I've really needed someone like him around these last few weeks, but I have a little animosity toward him as well because he was inadvertantly responsible for the death of my little sister, Prim.

"Hey Catnip," he grimaces, using his nickname for me.

"Um, come in." I open the door wider to let him inside my house. "I'm sorry, I just wasn't expecting to see you here, now." I say, fumbling for the words.

"I know. I'm sorry, I should've called or something." He says as I lead him into the sitting room. "I don't mean to intrude or anything, I just wanted to check in on you and see how things are. Are you doing ok?"

I sit on the couch and glance up at him as he also takes a seat, "Yeah, things are ok. As good as I can expect them to be I guess. It's hard, I'm still dealing with a lot...considering..." I trail off. I didn't want to bring up the subject of Prim so soon, but without even thinking, that's where my train of thought just went.

He looks down at his hands and I can't help but think that those are the hands that created the bombs that killed my sister. "I know..." he says. I can tell he's trying to tread lightly. I know he's sorry that Prim died, but I can also tell he's not sorry for creating the bombs that ended her life. They are the thing that really helped end the war, I just wish that Prim and all of the other children there had not had to pay the price for that decision. He looks up and is about to say something when I hear my front door open, "Katniss? Are you ready to head out to the woods?"

Peeta steps into the room and I look up at him, not wanting him to take this un-announced visit from Gale as anything threatening to him, but I can tell that a switch is flipping inside his head as his happy demeanor starts to disappear. "You." he says, his tone menacing, taking another step into the room.

"Peeta," I say quickly standing and crossing to him to put myself in between the two of them as Gale also stands, in defense. "It's ok, Gale just came by to..." I place my hands on his chest to try to calm him down. I realize too late this was not a good choice on my part. Peeta's glare lowers from Gale's face to my own. Before Gale or I can even do anything to deter the action, I'm knocked to the floor with a harsh blow across my face as Peeta slaps me out of the way with the back of his hand. Gale quickly shoves Peeta back into the wall, "DON'T TOUCH HER!" he yells in his face. When Peeta looks down and sees me, still in the floor, my hand covering the tender spot on my face that he hit with way more force than I ever thought him capable of, he begins to come back to himself.

"Oh no," his face crumbles. "Katniss, no..." He looks so broken. So upset and horrified at himself. "I'm sorry." He squirms away from Gale and runs out of the house. Gale turns to watch him run across the street then goes to his knees in front of me.

"Katniss," he says gently, reaching to lightly touch my flaming red cheek, "Are you ok?"

Slowly, tears stinging my eyes, I shake my head. I'm trying so hard to be tough and not to break down, but the sobs start to wrack my body and I can do nothing to stop them. Gale reaches out and draws me to himself to try and calm me down. He doesn't realize that I'm not as upset with Peeta as I am with him. Gale's presence today in District 12 is what caused Peeta's shift in mood. I realize that Gale has been somewhat responsible for a lot of the pain I have experienced recently, and while I don't want to be upset with him, I can't just let things go back to the way they were between us. Surely he knows that I can't look him in the eyes and not see Prim die over and over again, while I could do nothing to stop it. Surely, he knows that. Then suddenly, his body stiffens. I'm not sure what has caused the sudden shift, but then he grasps my shoulders and looks at me with a hard look in his eyes. "Did he come in saying something about going hunting?"

I look up confused, "Yeah. We thought maybe it would be good for him if we spent some time together, so he asked if he could come with me today. Why? Is something wrong?"

Gale shakes my shoulders, "That's the dumbest thing you could possibly do! Go out in the woods all alone and hand him a weapon? You saw how fast he turned on you today, what if that had been in the woods?" He's so angry at me he's shaking. To be honest I had never thought about it like that, but I know Peeta would've been fine...at least that's what I keep telling myself right now. He goes on talking about how I can't trust Peeta right now and it just keeps making me mad. Gale is treating me like a child.

I lean back away from him, "Gale, I can't do this right now. Please, just go. We'll talk some other time." I whisper. He looks hurt, I know he's only looking out for me, but he nods his head. I watch out the window as he climbs back into the hovercraft he came in and flies away.

I sit, rocking back and forth for a few moments as my tears finish falling. How could this day go from being what I thought would be a such perfect day to becoming another one of my nightmares? My cheek is still throbbing and I know it's not going to look very good, but I'm not upset with Peeta at all. I don't blame him for what took place, I don't blame Gale either, not really. It's all because of the stupid Capitol. They're the ones that took Peeta and twisted his mind with lies and stories and caused him to be the angry person he can sometimes be now. I stand and numbly walk out my front door into the chilly, early morning air and walk up to Peeta's front door. I know that if Gale was still here he would be yelling again about how stupid it is for me to go over to Peeta's, saying he's going to hurt me again.

"Go away," I hear Peeta say after I knock a few times.

"Peeta, it's ok." I say, hating that he's so upset with himself. "Just talk to me. I'm fine."

Slowly the door cracks open and he peeks around the door. When he looks me in the eyes I can see his eyes are bloodshot...he's been crying as well. "Katniss, please. Don't make me feel worse than I already do. Just leave me alone."

"No, Peeta." I say sticking my foot into the door as he tries to close it again. "Things will never get better if you don't stop pushing me away after something like this happens. Please." I plead with him. "I promise I'm not even hurt." I say trying to put on my poker face. He shakes his head and leads me to a mirror in the entryway. "You sure about that?" he asks pointing to the mirror.

I'm mildly shocked at my appearance. My right eye is already starting to turn purple and is beginning to swell a little and my cheek is bright red from the force of his hand. I try to act nonchalant about the whole thing, but seeing it for the first time I know now it looks just as bad as it feels and I know he knows that too. "Katniss," he says, gazing at the ground. "I'm sorry...I...I can't do this right now." I try to hold in my tears as I hear the words I just spoke to Gale repeated back to me. "Please, stop being so forgiving. I just gave you a black eye and you didn't even do anything to deserve it. I just need to be alone." I nod my head, knowing that there are no words of comfort I can speak to him at this moment, and walk out the door, closing it behind me. Once I'm back inside my own house I sit at my kitchen table and the tears return. I can do nothing to stop them. I know Peeta hates himself right now. All I want to do is hold him and let him know it's ok, but I know that that's no help to him right now. I put my head in my hands then I hear Greasy Sae come in the back door.

She comes by every so often to fix me a meal and make sure I am taking care of myself. She seems to be in a somewhat cheerful mood, I hear her humming as she steps into the kitchen, then stops. "Katniss? What's wrong?" She asks as she sets some food on the counter.

I really just want to be alone now, but I know that now she's seen me crying into my hands that that will not happen. Slowly I lower my hands and look up to meet her gaze. When she sees my blackening and partially closed eye she gasps, "Oh Katniss..." she says, sliding into the chair beside me. "Honey, did Peeta do this to you?" Choking back the sobs, I slowly nod my head. Her eyes are filled with rage, "I'm going right over there to give that boy what he's got coming to him."

Quickly I reach out and grab her arm shaking my head, "No! Please don't! He feels awful." I tell her everything that happened. About Gale being here, Peeta walking in, and the actions that followed, bringing about my injuries. I skip over the part about how Peeta was supposed to go hunting with me. Somehow I figured I could do without that lecture for a second time today. She gently strokes my hair, trying to soothe me.

"You just need to be really careful around that boy, you hear me? I know it's not his fault that he snaps like this, but if I ever come in and see you like this again you aren't going to stop me from going over there. You understand?" I nod my head and she gives me some ice for my eye telling me to go lie down and she'd bring me some hot soup in a little while.

That night I lie in my bed, unable to sleep, trying to forget about the things that had happened this morning and wondering if I was ever really going to get my Peeta to come back...

A/N: Thanks for reading chapter 2! Be sure to review and let me know your thoughts!