Disclaimer: Would I be doing this if I owned Conrad and Kyo Kara Maou?
…. Well, okay. I would. Alas, I don't own it.
Warning: There was crack and a lot of sugar involved.
I forget if it was in me or in Wolfram. Probably both. So expect…well, insanity.
Nazekeoya
Xielle
"Time gives us happiness… but it can also take everything away from us."
Chapter 2: Wolfram
Zephyr
- - -
"He's doing it again…"
"Oh, Wolfram…" came the sigh in the usual soft, barely perceptible whisper as the wind carried it together with the mixed feelings of empathy and a knowing air.
Just like before… just like it was a long, long time ago…the voice that had never been gone from his memories and dreams.
Its presence lingered even at the edge of his consciousness; its comfort still weaved through his dreams. It was his longing, his weakness and his downfall.
"It's not fair."
No response. But that didn't dissuade him. This is how they were.
- - -
Whatever utter nonsense others favored to believe, Wolfram was not ignorant. No, he was definitely anything but.
Especially when it came to Yuuri's activities. Particularly, when in company of 'skirts' and a certain Sir Weller.
Saying the two were merely "close" would be such a ridiculously huge understatement. No, the two shared a bond.
And since Wolfram was there whenever they had one of their episodes, he can see what both Conrad and Yuuri themselves fail to see. What, even the rest of the castle can see.
They complement the other and share a deep, mutual understanding of the other. There was a deep, special bond between them.
Their bond – A bond that Wolfram deliberately chose to overlook; belatedly understood and refuse to accept –
- - -
"You knew this would happen, didn't you?" Wolfram accused indignantly. "I even daresay you expected this of him? You knew!"
No reply. Just that frustrating serene blankness, yet again.
But the wind around him picked up, seeking his attention as if to comfort him as they once did before, offering an apology.
"I am sincerely sorry, Wolfram."
Apologizing for what, exactly?
"What for? That I feel like I'm always shoved aside and left behind by everyone else, my own brother included, so instead they substitute in their absence, lavish gifts; everything I'd ever want, apparently?"
Lost in frustration, Wolfram continued on, "Or is it that you're sorry that I'm an idiot enough to have pushed away Conrad, the only one willing to make an effort to be, at least, a friend for me so I'm always left alone by myself?"
"Well, don't. I've been dealing with my loneliness for years and I've no grief left for it! I'm not a pathetic, weak-hearted… human!" And turning his back to walk out, Wolfram paused only a moment to reluctantly listen.
"…That you can't bring yourself to cry over it… That is just so sad."
- - -
– Their bond – that of which Wolfram couldn't bring himself to break; cannot break.
So he is envious, bitter and resentful, and hateful – hateful of Conrad.
But he can hear that voice from his memories; still the same as ever, with that knowing air, "Is it worth the pain that you feel now – to see the face of your brother really happy?"
And Wolfram is no longer immature – as immature as he was twenty years ago, anyway.
So with that smile and that voice still fresh in his memory, he could hold off his instinctual hate and envy – the pain is bearable. He could calm himself. Assure himself that there isn't anything more than there should be, especially not that kind of emotionally.
But Wolfram is no idiot. He is not so stupid as to deliberately, still ignore what's before him.
Julia.
"I love you, Julia."
"I know, Wolfram."
"…But?"
She made no reply, nor any motion to do so; nothing except for silence which Julia would look only through the window despite her inability to actually see.
She made no reply, nor any motion to do so. Nothing except the silence from Julia looking through the window despite her inability to actually see.
She didn't speak, not even when Wolfram left the room.
Yuuri
Yuuri as he averts from Wolfram's pointed glares when Yuuri makes no reaction, whatsoever to Wolfram's declarations of love.
Conrad and Yuuri's complete understanding of one another.
"Yuuri's soul is Julia's!"
And as Wolfram stood in the same spot Julia has stood in whenever she came to teach him, he belatedly understood.
From his position –her position – one could easily view the courtyard – the courtyard where Conrad trained the soldiers.
Conrad.
Conrad as he acquires the heart of Julia, Wolfram's first love, and before he's even had a chance.
And Conrad as he snatches from right under Wolfram's possessive hold, Yuuri, his fiancée, and just when he thought he had finally won too.
- - -
"Well, now I get it!"
Thoroughly aggravated, Wolfram glared at the small memorial, bearing her name and the dates of both her birth and her death.
And this time, he didn't look back even as he thought he felt an apologetic air reach out to him.
Not even with the comfort of her memory could he calm himself when he recalls his pathetic inability to get Yuuri to love him back.
11.16.2007