Pink Squirrel Orgies
Thanks to those who have read so far, and especially those who have reviewed (EvilHunterX and Sweetboxer). Enjoy Chapter Two!
Chapter Two - Just A Buncha Lovers
In the background, Kevin could hear a commercial:
"Do you want the world to be taken over by Commies? Of course not! So buy a Ford at your nearest dealer, today!"
"Those commercials get more stupid by the day," Kevin muttered to himself. But that wasn't important right now.
He had decided that getting David smashed might increase his chances of something happening between them. Even if that didn't work, he was interested in how David would act when really drunk. Perhaps he would open up and tell them about his past or something.
Kevin wasn't just trying to use David. He did find him attractive, and he wouldn't mind getting to know him. He was a worthy substitute for the Captain, at the very least.
"Drinks are on me tonight!" he announced. His cop's salary might not handle that well, but this could be worth it.
Mark cheered, apparently forgetting that Kevin had insulted him earlier. Alyssa went over to the bar immediately and ordered three martinis.
Yoko and Jim came out of the bathrooms, curious about the racket. When they found out what was going on, they joined in the fun.
Soon, everyone was really drunk. When Yoko had had a few drinks, she opened up a little and decided to hit on David. She'd always had a bit of a crush on him, but she'd be too shy to talk to him under normal circumstances. But now, she wasn't thinking very clearly.
She sat down on a stool next to David. "Hey baby. Want to go out for something to eat?" she asked, swaying slightly.
"No thanks. I'm not really hungry," David said, his voice slurred.
"Then how about we get a room at the nearest Holiday Inn?" she asked, running a hand up the man's thigh.
"I'm sorry, but I'm not available," he said. It was a lie, but he didn't want to get into this crap right now - or ever. He just wanted to get drunk in peace, then drive home. Was that so much to ask?
Yoko looked disappointed for a moment, but she wasn't going to give up. She leaned closer to David. "If you've got a girlfriend, show me some pictures."
"I don't have any," David said nervously.
She looked closely at his face, her eyes unfocused. "You're lying. Do you hate me that much?" she asked. She looked like she might cry.
David could feel the headache already. He didn't want to deal with some woman shrieking and sobbing in his ear. It was time for a desperation measure. He looked over at Kevin, who was still sitting there, watching the exchange sourly. He put his arm over the cop's shoulders.
"Kevin and I don't really like to go around showing pictures. Some people...wouldn't approve," the plumber said, giving Kevin a look that was as close to loving as he could stand.
Yoko was stunned. "You're…a homo?"
"Yes," David said. He saw the way that Kevin was looking at him and he hoped that he hadn't just made things worse.
Yoko backed away and ran to the bathroom, presumably to cry after the rejection.
"I knew it!" Kevin said as soon as she was gone.
"I only said that so that she would leave me alone. I'm straight, I tell you," David grumbled. But Kevin wasn't listening.
"She left me for that bastard!" Jim suddenly screeched. Everyone stopped what they were doing to stare at him.
"What the hell are you talking about!" Alyssa yelled, her red face inches from his.
Jim didn't answer; instead, he started blubbering.
"God, shut up!" Alyssa said angrily. Jim only cried louder.
At this point, Yoko came back out of the bathroom, but she was barely recognizable. Her hair was cut very short, almost down to her scalp. She was wearing a pair of baggy khaki pants and a green vest over a t-shirt. She could pass for a man – if the one looking at her was intoxicated.
"Hey, David, what do you think of that guy?" Kevin asked, failing to notice that the "guy" had come out of the ladies' room.
David opened his mouth to repeat that he wasn't gay, but then he realized that it was Yoko. This was getting weird.
"Whoo! How about an orgy at City Mattress?" she called. She staggered over to sit next to David.
"Great idea!" George said.
"Who's that cutie over there?" Alyssa asked loudly.
"I dunno, but I want some," Cindy replied, grinning devilishly.
They all left the bar and went out onto the sidewalk. There were a few other people stumbling around, but nobody took notice. As everyone struggled with their keys in the parking lot, moans broke out nearby.
.o.
David was cursing loudly because he had scratched up his car door, trying to get the key into the slot. He finally succeeded and ducked into the vehicle.
Someone slammed into the door as soon as he closed it, then proceeded to bang on the window. It took David a few seconds to notice and register this, but when he did, he promptly flipped the idiot off. When that didn't deter the asshole (who looked very sickly and was probably homeless, judging by his tattered clothes), David started up the car and roared out of the parking lot. He had a desire to go back and run the jackass over, but decided that he didn't want to be some muscle-bound gentleman's bitch in the state penitentiary. Again.
Anyhoo, all the drunkards were driving to City Mattress, and having a great time of it. And by having a great time, I mean colliding with various objects such as mailboxes, lampposts, and each other at random intervals.
.o.
Kevin's mind wandered as he turned on the corner of Maple Street. They would be arriving at their destination soon, if his sense of direction hadn't failed him completely.
He started thinking about the one that he'd been after for the past few months – Albert Wesker. Damn, he wanted that man. That's the main reason he continually applied to join S.T.A.R.S., even after so many tries. But, if he got to work with Wesker every day, that would be worth it. To fight terrorists at his side. To sit in the same office and stare at that wonderful form all day.
Ah, that man's body was a work of art. Kevin thought of it now. His stern face, his golden hair, his muscular arms, his…
Dammit, Ryman, leave me out of your fucking fantasies! I'm with David King, you delusional fool! the mental image of Wesker told him. And in his drunken state, Kevin believed him.
.o.
David approached the front of the City Mattress, after a sloppy parking job on the curb. Kevin was already there, along with Alyssa and Cindy. The cop seemed upset, and he turned to the plumber when he walked over.
"Is it true?" Kevin asked, tears streaming down his ruggedly handsome face. "Goddammit, tell me the truth!"
David recoiled. Whoa, this guy's totally nuts. First he smiles for no apparent reason, now he's crying, he thought.
Kevin clutched the front of David's shirt and cried on his chest. "How could you two do such a thing!"
"Get a hold of yourself, man! What the hell are you talking about?" David grabbed the cop by the shoulders and shook him.
"Wesker told me all about you two. Don't even try to lie!" Kevin cried.
"Who's Wesker?" David asked, more confused than ever.
"You mean, you don't know him?" Kevin asked, sniffing.
"No, I have no idea what you're talking about. Now can you please get off me?" David said, backing up a step.
"Oh, okay. I'm sorry I overreacted. Now, let's go!" Kevin said, cheering up immediately. He turned to the glass doors of the City Mattress.
Yoko screeched to the curb and stepped out of the vehicle.
"Mine!" Alyssa shouted, pointing at her.
"No way, you can have Jim," Cindy said.
"Dammit, he'll start crying halfway through. I am going to have that Asian dude and that's final!" Alyssa screamed back.