Chapter Two

A/N: see disclaimer in chapter one.

"Come on, Hermione." Sirius whined.

"Alright. Got it."

GINNY: "You're supposed to take me to Madam Malkins and use those sickles Mum gave you for my robe fitting!"

"I am nothing like that!" Ginny hissed.

HARRY: "Uhh...who's this?"

"Smooth, Potter."

"Shove it Malfoy!"

RON: "Uh…this is stupid little dumb sister Ginny, she's a freshman. Ginny this is Harry. Harry Potter…this is Harry Potter."

"Grrr."

"Ginny, that's not me!" Ron said from behind Sirius.

GINNY: "Oh…You're Harry Potter, you're the boy-who-lived!"

"Yes, yes I am."

HARRY: "Yeah, you're Ginny."

GINNY: "It's Ginevra."

"No, it's Ginny!"

HARRY: "Cool, Ginny's fine."

"Nice one Harry."

"Sirius, stop talking."

RON: "Stupid sister! Don't crowd the famous friend."

HERMIONE: "Do you guys hear music or something?"

RON: "Yeah, someone's coming!"

CHO's POSSE: "Cho Chang Domo arigato, Cho Chang Gung Hey Fat Choy, Chang Happy Happy New Year, Cho Chang"

The Trio, Malfoy, Ginny, Sirius and Cedric were all laughing. Cho was glaring at all of them.

GINNY: "Whoa, who's that?"

RON: "That's Cho Chang, the girl that Harry's been totally in love with since freshman year."

"Really, Harry?" Cho asked.

Harry was determined to look anywhere but at her. Especially with Cedric gaping at him like an idiot.

HERMIONE: "Yeah, but he won't say anything to her."

"*Lockheart*" Harry coughed into his fist, and Hermione just hit him.

RON: "Yeah, you never tell a girl you like her it makes you look like an idiot!"

"So true." all the guys there agreed.

GINNY: "Konichiwa Cho Chang, I'm Ginny Weasley!"

"I'm not like that!"

GIRL: "Bitch, I ain't Cho Chang!"

"Then who is she?" Cho asked.

RON: "That's Lavender Brown! Racist sister!"

Harry and Ron burst out laughing. Cho and Ginny frowned , but even Snape was having a hard time keeping the smirk off his face.

CHO: "Hey, it's alright, I'm Cho Chang y'all."

"That's supposed to be me?" Cho asked. "Wouldn't the Asian be better, seeing as Cho and Chang are both Asian names?"

"It's supposed to be a joke." Malfoy said, annoyed at the reactions this video had been getting.

HARRY: "She is totally perfect."

"Oh, Harry. That's so sweet." Cho cooed. Cedric glared at Harry.

RON: "Yeah, too bad she's dating Cedric Diggory though, huh?"

"Yes!"

"No!"

HARRY: "What? Who the hell is Cedric Diggory? What is that- who is that guy?"

"Here comes me!"

CEDRIC: "Oh, Cho Chang I am so in love with Cho Chang From Bangkok to Ding Dang I sing my love aloud for Cho Chang"

Harry, Ron and Malfoy began rolling on the floor laughing. All the girls in the room sighed. Cedric gawked at the screen.

"Hey, I'd never just push someone down." Cedric snapped.

HARRY: "I hate that guy! I hate him."

"Don't blame you." Harry muttered.

RON: "So, are we gonna get those robes or not?"

"Woah, Ron's actually going shopping?"

"Quiet Ginny."

GINNY: "Okay, alright I'm going!"

RON: "God, sister!"

"Some things never change."

"Shut it Malfoy." The trio and Ginny just muttered.

GOYLE: "Present your arm nerd! Indian burn hex!"

"Why would Goyle know that?" Malfoy wondered.

"He can talk?" Harry and Ron asked.

RON: "Oh, Crabbe and Goyle…"

HARRY: "Hey, why don't you leave Neville Longbottom alone, huh?"

"Saint Potter."

"Stuff it Malfoy."

GOYLE: "Well, well, if isn't Harry Potter. You think all because you're famous you can boss everyone around!"

HARRY: "No, I just don't think it's cool for guys of your size to pick on guys like Neville!"

GOYLE: "Yeah, well I think glasses are for nerds! We hate nerds!"

"Then you hate everyone in Ravenclaw."

"Cho stop glaring at Sirius."

CRABBE: "And girls!"

"That explains so much." Both Ron and Malfoy muttered.

HARRY: "Oh, my glasses…"

RON: "Whoa, well you asked for it! Harry Potter defeated the Dark Lord when he was just a baby!"

"Nice Ron."

HERMIONE: "Alright, will everybody just calm down. Occulus Reparo!"

"Thanks Hermione."

"When will you learn that spell?"

HARRY: "Whoa, cool!"

HERMIONE: "And let's leave these big baby childish jerks alone!"

HARRY: "Yeah."

DRACO: "Did someone say Draco Malfoy?"

Every student but Malfoy burst out laughing when his character came on. Basically Draco was a girl.

RON: "What do you want Draco?"

DRACO: "Crabbe, Goyle, be a pip and go pay for my robes, will you? So, Potter! Back for another year at Hogwarts, are you? Maybe this year you'll wise up and hang out with a higher caliber of wizard!"

HARRY: "Ron and Hermione are my best friends in the whole world, I wouldn't trade them for anything."

DRACO: "Have it your way. Wait, don't tell me…red hair, hand-me-down robes, and a stupid complexion; you must be a Weasley!"

"OI!"

RON: "Oh my God, lay off Malfoy! She may be a pain in the ass okay, but she's my pain in the ass."

"Oh, Ron. You do care."

"Course. You're my sister Ginny and a real pain in the ass."

DRACO: "Well, isn't this cute? It's like a little loser family! Hogwarts has really gone to the dogs…Luckily next year, I'll be transferred to Pigfarts!"

Harry, Ron and Cedric burst out laughing like boys usually do when met with jokes about farts. Ginny giggled, and Sirius was rolling on the floor laughing his tail off.

MALFOY: "This year you bet I'm gonna get outta here the reign of Malfoy is drawing near I'll have the greatest wizard career, and its gonna be totally awesome"

Harry, who had just begun to calm down, burst back out in hysterical laughter.

"Look out world, for the dawn of the day When everyone will do whatever I say And that Potter won't be in my way, and then I 'll be the one who is totally awesome!"

"Am I not already totally awesome?"

"No."

GOYLE: "Yeah you'll be the one who is totally awesome."

HERMIONE: "Come on guys! Were gonna miss the train!"

"Yeah, we wouldn't want that." Hermione smirked. Ron and Harry began to laugh. Everyone else—minus the professors—looked confused.

ALL: "Who knows how fast this years gonna go? Hand me a glass, let the butterbeer flow"

HARRY: "Maybe at last, I'm gonna talk to Cho,"

Cho blushed. She hadn't known that Harry had a crush on her.

"Mate, is Cedric glaring at you?" Ron muttered into Harry's ear.

"Yeah."

"Creepy."

RON: "Oh no, that be WAY too awesome"

"Nice one." Ron said.

"I agree." Sirius barked out a laugh.

ALL: "We're back to learn everything that we can It's great to come back to where we began And here we are, and alakazam! here we go, this is totally awesome!"

"I agree with those kids." Sirius grinned.

"Come on and teach us everything you know The summers over and were itchin' to go I think were ready for-"

"Is that Neville?" Ginny asked.

NEVILLE: "Albus Dumbledore! Oooooo Ahhhhhh."

The Trio, the Marauders and Ginny burst out laughing at the sight of Dumbledore's character.

DUMBLEDORE: "Welcome, all of you to Hogwarts I Welcome back you all to school Did you know that here at Hogwarts We've got a hidden swimming pool?"

"Really?"

"No, Sirius."

"Welcome, welcome, welcome Hogwarts Welcome, all you hotties, nerds, and tools Now that I've got you here at Hogwarts I'd like to go over just a couple of rules:

My name is Albus Dumbledore, and I am headmaster here at Hogwarts. You can call me Dumbledore! Of course you also call me Albus, if you wanted detention. I'm just kidding, I'll expel you if you call me Albus!"

"Nice one sir."

"Thank you Mr. Potter."

ALL: "Back to wizards and witches, and magical beasts to goblins and ghosts and to magical feasts it's all that I love, and all that I need. at HOGWARTS, HOGWARTS,

"You know, I don't think that they love school." Remus mused.

"I think you're right." Sirius told his friend.

Back to spells and enchantments, potions and friends To Gryffindors! Hufflepuffs! Ravenclaws! Slytherins! Back to the place where our story begins It's Hogwarts, Hogwarts,"

"Who'd want the Slytherins back?" Harry muttered to Ron.

"Dumbledore?"

DUMBLEDORE: "I'm sorry, what's its name?"

ALL: "Hogwarts, Hogwarts"

DUMBLEDORE: "I didn't hear you kids!"

ALL: "Hogwarts, Hogwarts"

HARRY: "Man, I'm glad I'm back."

"Well, that's the end of the second clip." Ginny said. "More!"

Cho looked over at Harry who was trying to avoid looking at her or at Cedric. Cedric was glaring at Harry.

"Yeah, more!"

"All right, keep your hair on." Hermione muttered.