Leaves swirled across the front porch, and Beth pushed away long strands of hair that had escaped her loose ponytail. Like in any "normal" town, the citizens of Alexandria Safe Zone walked along the street chatting and going about their general business. But as Beth stood at Maggie's front door waiting to be let in, it felt like dozens of pairs of eyes burned up the back of her neck. She fidgeted in Daryl's shirt, tied up over her spare tank top, and if she was being honest it brought her the comfort she needed to face her sister.
The door swung open, and Maggie's lips trembled into a smile, stepping aside to let Beth inside. Looking to the right, Rick stood up from his seat in the living room.
"Hey Beth, I didn't know you'd be over, was just discussin' some town plans with your sister," Rick stepped forward as if to leave.
"Hey Rick," Beth smiled then motioned for him to sit down, "Please, don't let me keep ya from yer work."
"Have a seat Beth, ya want anythin' to drink or eat?" Maggie asked.
"Um, sure. Some water maybe?" Beth asked.
Maggie nodded, disappearing into the kitchen. Beth walked around and sat across from Rick. He'd spread out a map of what looked like ASZ and the surrounding woods and roads.
"What kind of town plans are ya makin'?" Beth asked.
"Talkin' bout safety today," Rick leaned forward, resting his elbow on his thighs, "Right now we've got sentries at the wall, and Sasha and two others take shifts up in the belltower, but our defenses are still pretty thin. We need more people in general, but especially ones trained to fight. Michonne and Sasha have been training people, but for so long the training was to hide."
Beth eyes scanned over the map, wheels turning, "Mm, sooner or later ya gotta fight, but I see your point. What do you do when fightin' ain't enough?"
Maggie entered the room with a glass of water, and Beth savored every sip. "Where's your bodyguard?" she asked.
Daryl or Budge? "Who?" Beth asked.
"That stinky wolf trailin' behind ya all day yesterday," Maggie teased.
"Oh, I sent him off with Daryl. Budge is pretty good at sniffin' people out," Beth said, "Thought he and Aaron could maybe use his help more'n me today. I figured I'd hang out with you, if ya weren't too busy."
Maggie shook her head, "Rick and I are just goin' over these maps. We're tryin' to get creative till we've got more good people to defend this place, but don't worry, you're safe here."
"Well, we're safer, but I don't know if I'd say I'll stop worrying," Beth spoke softly but firmly, "Have y'all ever thought bout makin' this place work for us?"
Rick raised an eyebrow, "How so?"
"Just like the wall. It's there to keep the walkers and other threats out, but shouldn't that be our last defense, not our first? We have a lot of land out here. We should try to thin the herd before thousands are all pushing outside to get in," Beth moved forward in her seat, pointing to the relatively sparse woods surrounding ASZ. She continued to make suggestions, seeing more potential the more she went on.
Beth wasn't talking to anyone in particularly. Really, she was just speaking aloud to herself, pointing out things she would do to defend herself like how she and Budge managed all those weeks and weeks alone. What she didn't notice were Maggie and Rick exchanging a look before turning their attention to where Beth was pointing. Maggie pulled out a notebook she used to get down all their ideas, and at one point, Rick handed Beth a pencil so she could mark areas where she felt certain "deterrence systems" as she called them, should go.
"We just need to work smarter, not harder," Beth shrugged.
Rick sat back in his chair, regarding Beth as she and Maggie discussed the wood spikes out at the prison. Before sunrise, Daryl had knocked at the Grimes' door. Rick assumed his friend needed to tell him something about the scouting trip they'd planned, but he was wrong.
"Hey Brother, headed out with Aaron?" Rick moved to let Daryl inside. He turned towards the kitchen, meaning to make a pot of coffee.
"Yeah," Daryl said taking a seat at the marble counter-topped island.
"How long'll you be gone for?"
"Jus' the day. Told Aaron I wanted to get back by dinner, but there was a neighborhood south a'here that doesn't look so abandoned. If there are people livin' nearby, we gotta know," Daryl crossed his arms over his chest.
Rick nodded, moving around the kitchen, filling up the coffee pot with water. "Well be safe."
This time it was Daryl's turn to nod, and then the two men just stood there staring at one another, expecting the other to say something more or say their good-byes.
"I'm takin' Beth's dog with Aaron and me," Daryl said.
Rick raised an eyebrow. The dog nearly took a hand off when he'd reached out to pet him, he couldn't imagine what Daryl had done to earn its trust. "Okay?"
"Beth's gon' be with Maggie today. If ya see her, just, could ya not hand her Judith or give her a job yet? Just… if you hang out with her… just let her be Beth," Daryl shifted in his seat, uncomfortable as all get-out.
"Okay?" Rick tried not to look confused, because it was obvious Daryl was trying to impart some sort of meaning by coming to his home just to talk to him about Beth, "Daryl, you and Beth…" He trailed off lamely, recognizing that neither of them were succeeding in their communication skills that morning.
Michonne broke the awkward silence between the two men, trudging down the stairs as she stifled a yawn. "Coffee," she demanded.
With that, Daryl mumbled, "See ya later man." And he was gone.
"Rick, Beth thinks we should put a team together to take a look on the outside and see what it would take to set up these defenses," Maggie turned to Rick, effectively ending his private musings.
"Ya sure ya wanna go back out there Beth? Ya just got here today," Rick looked at Beth, and suddenly he understood why Daryl had come to him. He wasn't looking at the sweet young women who filled the cell block with lullabies. Just like anyone else who'd made it this far—in Beth's case, even farther— to survive, they'd all been forged into something stronger. Her skin was marred with scars acquired in a trial by fire. Her eyes were soft and at the same time there was a steely edge beneath the surface that made him regret asking his question.
"A'right Beth, I think Abe, Eugene, and Morgan would be helpful to ya. Maggie, you up for a trip outside the walls?" Rick asked Maggie this time. These two women had been part of his family for so long, he couldn't help but want to protect them both, even though it was evident they didn't need anyone's protection.
"I wanna radio Sasha and have her on the lookout, and she should have extra ammo," Maggie said, "We'll only inspect the area within her vantage point. Beth thinks we need to build more perches, high up in the trees so we have a 365-view of the area."
There was a tinge of sadness in the way Maggie spoke. She was simultaneously proud, guilty, mournful, impressed, and bursting with joy to have this creature sitting next to her. Rick recognized the watery look to Maggie's eyes, and quickly excused himself to go find Abe, Eugene, and Morgan. The Greene sisters watched their leader make his exit, and then Beth and Maggie turned to one another.
Beth took a deep breath, aching for a buffer, missing Budge and Daryl acutely. Her hands trembled slightly as she reached for her glass of water. Be who you are, not who you were, Daryl's voice echoed back to her.
"Bethy," Maggie licked her lips, "I need to tell you something." She could see her younger sister begin to tense. Before she would have reached out to her, pulled her in and comforted her, but things had changed. Instead the older Greene clutched her hands together in her lap.
"Okay," Beth said, squaring her shoulders. She could handle whatever Maggie would say, and then the words that followed made her feel simultaneously ten and a hundred years old.
"I'm pregnant," Maggie breathed out, and her voice already began to shake, "And I'm so glad you're here… because I'm so scared."
Beth gasped. Pregnant? Was this real life? She was sitting on this couch next to her sister, who was so beautiful and healthy and strong. It felt so real. But hadn't she just been scrounging through glove compartments and backseats of abandoned cars? Wandering aimlessly through the woods?
"Oh Mags," Beth felt her defenses crumbling. The day before, the sight of Maggie terrified her. All she saw was a stranger. The person she saw and the sister she knew could not be reconciled in her mind, and what made her stomach churn even more was that Maggie looked at her in the same way. She still did. Like she was some creature from the afterlife. Returned, but not completely whole. In the tiny cracks of her soul, she could see some of her former self shining through. She remembered vividly, all her hopes and dreams that her daddy would get to live out the rest of his days, and when he'd go, it'd be peaceful and quiet. That Maggie and Glenn would have a baby…
The tremor in her hands made her want to hide them in her lap, but she leaned forward anyway, wrapping her arms around Maggie, and this time they both cried. Maggie's tears a combination of hormones and relief, Beth's a catharsis she didn't know she needed.
"I miss Daddy," Beth whispered.
"Me too Bethy," Maggie murmured into her sister's shoulder. It was the first time either had let themselves admit it. It was the first time they could actually speak it out loud, and neither knew how badly they needed each other to mourn the loss of the first important man in their lives.
Beth pulled back after awhile so she could swipe a hand under her dripping nose, "He always knew what to do so I didn't have to."
This time Maggie did reach forward and take Beth's hands, like they were little girls sharing secrets on her childhood bed. "I know Bethy, but now you know what to do, all on your own. And I'm so glad, cuz this little boy or girl is gonna need someone as strong as Hershel Greene. Between the two of us, I know it's you. I wish… I wish I'd known it sooner. I would've been there. I wouldn't have lost you."
Panic rose up Beth's spine, threatening to pull her under. Thinking of being 'lost', of having to claw her way back to this very point, just to be able to sit next to her sister and for both of them just to be breathing.
"I'm stronger Mags, but I'm still just as scared as you," Beth admitted, "I still need you, but I want my bein' here to matter. I don't want to be invisible anymore. I'm not just background noise."
Maggie nodded, tears pricking her eyes again. "Ugh, I swear, all this cryin'! What's the point of a motherly glow and big boobs if I've always got snot runnin' down my face?!"
For the second time Beth laughed, really laughed. She felt something shifting inside her. Happiness? She couldn't place the feeling because the routine had been run, hide, fight, repeat. Beth stood up and held her hand out to her sister, "C'mon, let's clean up ol' Snotface."
Budge's heightened dog senses were invaluable to Aaron and Daryl that day. At one point Aaron looked at Daryl and asked him why they hadn't thought to use dogs before.
"Prolly cuz not all dogs are like Budge. He's the smartest sum'bitch I've met," Daryl rumbled lowly.
"Thanks," Aaron lowered his binoculars and glanced at his partner.
It took quite a bit of coaxing from Beth for Budge to get in the car with Aaron. He kept hopping out and standing next to Daryl on his motorcycle as if he'd be able to run alongside it. Beth was patient as ever, crouching down so she was eye level with the dog. It was like Budge understood every single word Beth said, because he'd returned to the backseat behind Aaron, and when he was let out, he stayed between the two men no matter where they went.
The neighborhood piqued Aaron's interest because it was one of the few he hadn't scouted within easy driving distance from ASZ. It piqued Daryl's interest because despite it's abandoned appearance, things didn't add up. The roads in the neighborhood had been cleared. There wasn't a shuffling walker in sight, and while there were some remnants of debris, there were no dead bodies to be found. They spent the whole day watching the cul-de-sac, with Aaron listening for any sound. No matter what direction they were facing, Budge faced outwards, covering their backs.
Daryl assumed it was the sun starting to set that had Budge on edge. About thirty minutes before they decided to pack up and head home, Budge began pacing, mohawk raised. Even though ASZ was only about a thirty minute drive away, they never made it a habit to travel in the dark. Daryl and Aaron hadn't heard or seen any imminent threat, but Budge continue to pace circles around them until they were already back on the road.
The trip back was uneventful. As soon as Aaron opened the back passenger door, Budge bolted, immediately on the hunt for Beth. He and Daryl found Beth talking to Eugene in his workshop. Something tightened in his chest at the sight of Beth still wearing his flannel even though it looked like she was wearing all new clean clothing and a new pair of shoes.
"Budgey!" Beth sank down to throw her arms around the dog, "Ya brought him back in one piece. Thanks Daryl."
Daryl grunted out a, "Yer welcome," rather than blurting out, "What're ya doin' with Eugene?"
"C'mon boy, Maggie said we gotta clean you up if you're gonna be my shadow," Beth led Budge by his harness, waved good-bye to Eugene, and fell into step with Daryl.
Over top Daryl's flannel, Beth was also sporting a shoulder holster, her pistol strapped close to her side, and her large hunting knife strapped at her hip. As they walked, Beth's hand rested on the handle of her knife just like when they were still out in the woods getting back to her car.
"How'd it go today?" Daryl asked.
"Good," Beth turned her face up and smiled, "Maggie's havin' a baby."
Another grunt in response. "That why she keeps cryin'?"
"Mmhm," Beth tucked another strand of hair behind her ear. "Now what's my excuse for blubberin' like a big baby?"
"Yer a big baby?" Daryl deadpanned.
"Funny Dixon. Careful, might make ya sleep on the floor again 'stead a'movin' in with Maggie and Glenn," Beth narrowed her eyes at him.
Another grunt, and a sinking hollow feeling in the pit of his stomach. Daryl spent the day watching Budge and being jealous that he had spent every night with Beth Greene wrapped around him. Budge had kept Beth safe where he had failed so epically. He wasn't sure why she let him even stand next to her.
They made it to Maggie's house, and Daryl briefly nodded before turning to cross the street.
"Busy right now?" Beth called after him. There was that blinding smile again. Daryl wanted to accuse her of using it as a form of coercion.
He shook his head, "Naw."
"Help me scrub down Budge?"
There was that active volcano again. Yup. Daryl turned and followed her into the house, Budge trotting between them without suspecting a thing.
"Hey Daryl," Maggie looked up from the maps she had spread out all over the dining table, "Bethy, I put a bucket of soap and stuff outside for you to use for Budge."
"Thanks," Beth continued through the house and out to the backyard. There was a stack of towels and the bucket as promised. Budge seemed to sense an unpleasant experience was heading his way and tried to run away, but Daryl was quicker. If Budge didn't already look like a sorry sight with his clumped and matted fur, he sure did flattened out on the ground and whimpering.
"Shoulda had Maggie help ya if she wants the mutt clean," Daryl used one hand to grip Budge's harness and his other to shrug out of his vest and push up his sleeves.
"Maybe, although I'm pretty sure Budge would bite Maggie. He could be pretty vicious if he wanted to," Beth mirrored Daryl's actions, slipping off her weapons and Daryl's flannel shirt. Underneath she was only wearing a flimsy tank top, but she didn't want to get Daryl's shirt soaking wet. Now that Maggie had given her a whole pile of new clothes, it was unlikely he'd offer her another one.
"Thanks a lot," Daryl muttered. One part was sarcasm for Beth deeming him worthy to be bit by her dog and one part was compensating for the discomfort at being eye-level with her breasts in the flimsiest tank top ever invented in the zombie apocalypse.
Beth uncoiled the garden hose and came to stand on one side of Budge while Daryl held him on the other side, "Ready?"
Daryl nodded, trying to look anywhere but at her skin or the goosebumps that erupted up and down her arms, "Let's get this over with 'fore ya catch pneumonia."As soon as the sun started setting, the temperature dipped rapidly. That morning he and Aaron left, he could see his breath forming white clouds puffs.
As if on cue, Beth shivered, and Daryl could feel himself stiffen in his pants, unwelcome mental images of ways to keep her body warm flashing through his mind. Beth turned the hose on, making quick work of rinsing Budge clean with Daryl's help. She turned and flipped open the cap to a bottle of shampoo, pouring some of the soap into her hand and directly onto Budge's fur. Together they lathered Budge up, and to everyone's relief, most of the matting had just been weeks of accumulated dirt and mud hardened into his fur. Dipping her hand back into the bucket, Beth retrieved a pair of scissors, and she realized the shivering was no longer because it was getting cold outside.
She froze in place, clutching the scissors in her hands, and suddenly feeling lightheaded. Daryl saw every bit of color drain from her body, and he gently reached over and pried the scissors out of her grasp. He quickly clipped Budge's fur and then tossed the scissors back into the bucket, out of sight.
"C'mon Greene, let's get Budge rinsed off, and then he'll be good as new," Daryl's voice was gentle. Again it felt rough and intimate.
Beth nodded, shaking the chill off of her. She turned the hose to Budge, and by the time they were done, the sun had nearly set. She handed Daryl one of the towels and moved to recoil the hose back onto its stand. Before the towel even made contact with Budge's dripping fur, he pounced back up onto his feet and shook himself off so rigorously, seeking revenge on the evil oppressive humans. Daryl released a torrent of expletives trying to shield himself with the towel to absolutely no avail.
Budge trotted off to a far corner of the grass, where he could avoid any more punishment. The front of Daryl clothes were completely damp, but then he looked up at Beth to find a wicked grin slowly spreading across her face. In her hand was the hose, fingers imperceptibly twitching on the nozzle handle. Before she could do anything, he had his arms around her waist, and it was all over. Beth shrieked and immediately squeezed the nozzle, spraying Daryl wherever she could reach. In their struggle, they got tangled in the hose and sprawled out on the grass, Daryl managing to come out on top and in possession of the nozzle.
There was a brief moment where he was holding her down, and Beth glared up at him, "Don't you dare!" But it was too late. Her words were literally drowned out by the water sprayed in her face and all down her front. She was strong and she managed to get her arms free to knock the hose out of Daryl hands, but they were both completely soaked, out of breath… and he was still on top of her.
Before Daryl could hesitate, Beth fisted her hands up in the wet flannel fabric and pulled him down to her, roughly pressing her lips to his. It only took a second before his lips started moving on hers. Beth completely got lost in the feel of having him pressed over her. She'd never felt so safe or protected than having his body covering hers. All the months of anguish and lost time were poured into this moment. She yielded to him, allowing him entrance to her mouth, returning each passionate stroke of his tongue against hers. When he finally pulled away, his pants were more than just tight. The strain was unbearable and Daryl knew Beth could feel him against her thigh. He kept his forehead pressed to hers, his eyes shut tight to the rest of the world, savoring the feel of her shallow breaths and her chest heaving as she tried to bring down her heart rate.
Thank God for Maggie's obliviousness. Beth half-expected her to be standing over them when she opened her eyes. Instead all she saw was Daryl. Piercing blue eyes peered down at her, his face a mixture of worship and fear. He slowly peeled himself off her, and helped her to her feet. Budge lay sprawled out in the grass, a look of complete disinterest on his face tossed their way before he lazily began to lick himself. Daryl looked back at Beth and realized his hands were still holding her sides, thumbs caressing her skin up under her shirt. He cleared his throat, reaching behind her and helping her into his flannel.
The door swung open, and Maggie poked her head out, "Daryl, in case Beth hadn't told you, everyone's comin' over here for dinner." Her eyes tracked up and down their bodies, water dripping from their clothes. "If ya wanna change too…"
Beth's face was flushed, and she could still feel Daryl on her swollen lips, "Thanks." She turned back towards him, but he was already reaching for his vest.
"I gotta go," he mumbled, all but jogging around the the corner of the house and out of sight.
Budge trotted after him, watching him through the wrought iron fence posts until Beth called him back to her. She toweled him off as best she could, "Now that is how ya scare someone off."