part II

It was now a month after America's trip to Bohn and he was for the moment, back at home in Washington DC looking up the possible candidates for the operations he was about to conduct. Normally it would of taken less time to select someone if there was some additional help and input, but no. No, America wanted to do this on his own, he wanted to be the one to personally select people for the mission, he wanted everything to be in his own hands, under his control. That way things would be less likely to slip up, and there would be less chance of a leak or for a spy working for the Russians finding out, at least that was the idea behind his methods. He had even received reluctant permission from President Kennedy to do thus. America didn't understand his bosses' reluctance, he knew he was capable of working hard and choosing who he needed quickly, or so he had thought. However despite his expectations the operation had been slow going.

America pretended not to notice that. It didn't matter that America had been up for hours and had gotten so little sleep that the bags under his eyes were evident, nor did it matter that his hands shook as they went though the files. The only thing that mattered was America's meticulous methods and almost paranoid scrutiny of the men he was profiling. He had poured over the same files over and over, just in case. Whenever he finished going though one file a stinging feeling in his head and prickling feeling in his gut told him, no insisted to him, that it hadn't been enough, that he had to look it over again and again and that he had surely missed important details. At first he had tried to ignore that impulse but eventually he gave in, as he found ignoring it only made things worse and made his unease grow and grow.

In any case he was almost done, just a few more things to fill out, two more files to decide between, and everything would be ready. America sighed and looked at his watch, it was noon. His browns furrowed, he didn't remember the ten o clock hour passing, or the eleven o' clock hour for that matter. In fact he didn't even remember eating breakfast, not that he had gone home in the first place. America just shook his head, refusing to let this bother him and chucked almost nervously to himself, his hands rubbing his swollen and sleep deprived eyes as he slowly got up and left his office. As he made his way to the cafe however, he passed Kennedy who, before he could leave, stopped him by placing a firm but gentle hand on his shoulder. "Alfred are you doin' alright? You look beat, you didn't stay overnight did you?"

His question took America aback slightly since he hadn't expected it. He had gotten so caught up in his work that he hadn't really noticed, but now it was uncomfortably evident. He laughed sheepishly and rubbed the back of his neck saying, "Um...yeah I guess I did. But this is real important work I'm doing. I mean you know that Jack..." His boss sighed and gave America a few comforting pats on the back. "I know Alfred, and believe me I understand how important...and how stressful all this must be for you." He paused for a moment as if he was trying to find the right words, bit his lip, and then continued, "Forgive me for saying this...and I can't say I understand everything. You are America after all and I'm just a simple man trying my best to do my job and serve this country, serve you, but I might understand at least a little more than some others 'round here. I'm saying this so you'll take my advice to heart."

America looked at Kennedy for a moment, waiting for him to continue and when he didn't he asked, "And..what's that advice Jack?" For one small moment he felt like a young boy being advised by his older and wiser father. He wasn't quite sure how to feel about this. Normally it would of irritated him, but for some reason this time it felt different. Coming from Kennedy it just felt welcoming and comforting instead of irritating. Instead of being patronizing it was like he really cared, like America really mattered to him. "My advice is...just take it easy for a bit. Get some rest...how about you go eat lunch with Jackie and then help her out by giving your opinion on the new room she designed. She asked me to help her...but I'm not the best with these sort of things," he added with a slightly sheepish smile. "Caroline's with her too and she's been telling me she misses you." America of course remembered the little girl who had snuck him a chocolate last time they had met, she had given him a shy little smile along with it as well. She was such a cute kid. "Oh Caroline, Jack you know I'd love to but...but my work..."

He almost began babbling about the fate of the world as well, but cut himself off. He didn't quite know how Kennedy would react to that statement and it was better to be safe in any case. Even around those he would of normally trusted America had to watch what came out of his mouth these days, he knew he could never be too careful. " I know Alfred, I know. But it'll only be for an hour or two and then you can get right back on it." He looked America in the eye and then asked, "It's almost done isn't it?" That made America nod rather vigorously, he knew it had taken a while but it was all so necessary. It was needed for future security against the USSR, and that union was to America, the greatest evil the world had ever seen. "Yup, yup, almost done. Just gotta finish a few more things...but then it's a-ok to go." Kennedy grinned at that and said, "All the more reason to take a break then." He winked at America and gave him a friendly slap on the back. America then grinned back and nodded, saying, "Alright, you got me...I guess you got a point. I'll go eat lunch with Jackie and then go talk about...curtains." The two laughed at that and then went their separate ways.

A few hours later America realized that his boss had been right. Just as Kennedy had said his time with Jackie hadn't taken long and was enjoyable, her soft soothing coo of a voice and ladylike demeanor calmed his nerves and little Caroline had been a dear. Even now sitting at his desk the memory was enough to sooth him and bring a warm but small smile to his face as he continued working, and just as he promised in no time afterwards the selection and vetting process had been finished. However despite his fond feelings for Jackie, Caroline, and the warmth of presidential domesticity, the work had made him jittery and addled once more. Even after he had finished and sent the files to Kennedy for approval and admission he couldn't help but pace nervously back and forth, over and over in his office. He knew he had just sent them in but still, it was taking far too long for his liking. He was already feeling irritated as well, and so he was unable to do much of anything else for hours. Even remembering the taste of the cookies Caroline had snuck him, or the coffee Jackie had given him afterwards was unable to help him. No, now it was just America and his mind, all alone, and the millions of eyes of the world boring upon his back despite his solitude.

Notes

Caroline Kennedy was the Kennedy's daughter and their eldest child, the younger being John Jr. She was born in 1957 and at the time of the fic she is about five years old.