Again I know it's short but please give feedback, I'd love to know what you think
Later that evening, I was in Gibbs basement to hand in my resignation, but more importantly I needed to show him the letter, I needed to share this with somebody. He has always been like a father to me, and Ziva but I feel like this message was meant for him as well as me, after all, she cared for him since the moment she met him, the moment she pulled the trigger, the moment Ari died. I always felt as though Ziva and me were meant to be together, I didn't tell her that because of rule 12, and the fact that she kinda scared me, not that I ever admitted that of course. The first time we went undercover together, well, things got heated, maybe we went too far with the whole role playing situation, not that I minded. Her body was perfect, all her curves and imperfections were mine, I hadn't felt that way about a women before. That's what made us special. I really thought we were soulmates. I still do.
I couldn't form the words to explain to Gibbs what Ziva wanted, I tried, I opened my mouth but no words came out. I gave him the photo and allowed him time to read. Gibbs was very understanding, we cried, we talked about how amazing she was, Gibbs told me about Kelly, about how much Ziva would love her. We spoke about how she was loyal, a true inspiration to any agent. Gibbs told me he recommended her for some award for bravery, one she truly deserved. I told him about her singing, how beautiful and pure her voice was, how it could bring you into a trance, a dream world you'll never want to leave. We tried to talk about the funeral but neither of us could form the words. Ducky offered to help pay, he had some money aside. McGee is doing a slideshow, filled with memories, Abby is organising the music, Gibbs is making the casket, then there is me. I have the eulogy. A speech to honour her life. But there are no words to sum up the life of Ziva David. There are no sentences that could describe her life. No description true enough to show her beauty. I don't know what I'm going to do.
When I got home Tali was still awake, Jimmy had offered to watch her for me but I guess the opposite happened, she is awake watching him while he sleeps across my sofa. I picked up Tali and took her to the roll out bed next to mine, I don't really know if she has slept in a bed before or if she was still in a cot but I guessed it was a good time to start the transition. I made sure to drop a text to Breener telling her Jimmy was staying the night before tucking Tali in. She was tired but reluctant to sleep, I tried giving her some warm milk and Kah-lev, her teddy, but she still wouldn't settle. She was humming, a familiar tune, and that's when I remembered a conversation me and Ziva had a few years ago. About how her mother sung to her every night to get her to sleep. It got me thinking maybe she did the same thing.
I pulled out my phone and played a recording from years ago, one Ziva didn't know I had and I played it, just loud enough to hear it. Several moments later the young girl rolled over, yawning. A few minutes later she drifted into a deeper sleep and that's when I let the tears fall. Listening to her voice brought back many memories, some good, some bad but all treasured. Things I promised myself I'd never forget. I put the photo on my bed side table and curl into a ball, until I am out of memories and the dreams take over.