Chapter Two—The Road to the Capitol
I had been left in that room for a while before the peacekeepers came to get me and take me to the train. I was grateful for the time alone so I could get myself together since I didn't want to be a mess in front of the cameras—sponsors wouldn't want a weak tribute. That's one thing I have learned from watching the games all these years- weak tributes didn't get any sponsors. Not getting sponsors almost always meant that you didn't win and not winning is something I couldn't afford to do—I had promised Prim.
The door opened, and I stand to meet the peacemakers. They charge at me and pull me out of the room. I honestly don't know why they feel the need to manhandle me. They slam the door shut behind us and I find myself face to face with Gale. I am surprised when I feel an unexpected rush of anger towards him. It goes against everything I have ever felt towards Gale. We always get along and are almost always in agreement. I just don't understand why he would do this. Why would he volunteer when he has a family to support? He reaches for my hand.
"Don't touch me," I hiss angrily at him and march away, out of the justice building and straight onto the train, not bothering to stop for the cameras that are crowding the platform. I hear reporters shouting my name out but I grind my teeth together and keep walking—I am in no mood to give them the story they so desperately desire. Once I'm in the arena, they'll get a great show out of me but right now, I can't bring myself to give them what they want.
The elegance of the train takes the breath out of me. I have never seen anything so fine in district 12. After all, we are the poorest district. I take a deep breath and frown, a sharp and out of place smell stinging my nose. It does not match the eloquence of this train car. I look around and find myself staring at the town drunk, Haymitch. Oh great, I had forgotten that he would be my mentor. I can just imagine how unhelpful his drunken advice is going to be to Gale and me.
The car rocks as Gale climbs up behind me. "Katniss, what are you doing? You missed all the cameras! You need to think about sponsors!"
"Shut up, Gale. I don't think one missed camera opportunity is going to matter in the end," I remark bitterly.
"Now that's where you are wrong, sweetheart," Haymitch gets up and drunkenly struts over to the bar, pouring himself something to drink. Putting some ice in his glass, he sits down once more, motioning for Gale and me to do the same.
"Now listen, you two. I usually am not all into this mentor stuff because usually we have no way in hell of winning; but from the looks of this guy here, I'd say that district 12 actually has a chance finally."
I bit my tongue. I have just as much of a chance of winning as Gale (a poor one, when you consider the careers) but Haymitch wouldn't know that because he doesn't know anything about me. I can hunt and when I say that, I mean actually hunt. Give me a bow and arrow and I can get you just about anything that is running through the woods.
"Now as long as you two don't interfere with my drinking, I'll make sure that I'm sober enough to help you guys out. Do we have a deal here?"
What kind of a deal is that? I stare at Haymitch waiting for the laugh at the end of his joke. I'm not too shocked when one doesn't come. I look over at Gale who was already looking at me. He shrugs his shoulders slightly as if to say "What else can we do?" He turns back to Haymitch.
"It's a deal."
Landscapes flash by in a blur of colors and lines. I stare out the window, trying to make sense of the objects streaking past me. I feel Gale behind me but I'm not quite ready to talk to him yet. I'm still mad that he volunteered—I had been counting on him to take care of Prim for me. I press my forehead against the glass, wishing that I could be out there instead of on this train, racing towards my potential death.
"Katniss, please talk to me. I know you're mad but I can explain."
I exhale, my breath fogging up the window and turn to face him, a scowl on my face.
"Please do explain, Gale. Please because none of this is making any sense right now. Isn't it bad enough that I'm going to die? Did we really need to add you into this mess too? I can barely deal with my death. How am I supposed to add the death of my best friend- the person who knows me inside and out to the mix too? Please tell me because I don't know how to do it."
Gale steps forward and pulls me into a hug. I try to pull away but he tightens his grip.
"I'm sorry, Catnip. I really am. But how did you expect me to let you go to your death without trying to help you? You are my best friend- I couldn't do it. No more than you could let Prim do it."
I sigh in defeat—how am I supposed to respond to that? He has appealed to me at a level that I can understand. "I understand that, Gale, but there is no saving me. Careers always win the games and we aren't careers. We aren't getting out of this, Gale, neither one of us is going to be coming home."
"You don't know that, Catnip! I am strong and I taught you almost all the things you know about hunting. And you— you can hunt, you're athletic, and can use a bow and arrow like nobody I have ever seen. Together, we can do this. You can win this. You can't think negatively."
"There is no winning with you there beside me, Gale. Winning means that you are dead and that's no win for me." I pause and pull away from him, anger coursing through me again. "I promised Prim that I would try to win but how can I do that if that means the death of my best friend?"
Gale doesn't have an answer. He simply steps forward and pulls me into another hug and absently rubs my back. That's when it sinks in- I have to decide between Prim and Gale. If I lose, there is no guaranteeing that Gale would win. If I win, Gale would be dead but Prim would be happy. If Gale wins, I'd be dead, Prim wouldn't have me to protect her but Gale would be alive. As far as I was concerned, there is no winning—that much was clear. I sigh at the impracticability of all of it. There is only one thing I can do. In the arena, I'm going to have to go off on my own and let fate take care of things as it may, I'll try my hardest to win but I will not kill Gale and I will not let Gale help me out.
That night, I don't even bother trying to go to bed much to Effie's disapproval. According to her, district 12 will be the shame of all the districts with tributes that look like raccoons and that would be a "big, big problem!" Haymitch rolls his eyes at her and tells her to go powder her wig some more.
All night Gale and I sit up with Haymitch watching the reapings in all of the districts. I sit quietly as faces, names, and ages flash across the screen. Most tributes are insignificant. According to their looks, they pose no threat to me. I see many kids who are really young, underdeveloped, or simply too naïve to be considered a threat. However, the tributes from district 1 and 2 are an exception to that rule. District 1 has Marvel and Glimmer. The boy doesn't look too intimidating to me but with him being a career, I know I would be stupid to not pay attention to him. He is tall and skinny rather than being larger and muscular but I know that behind his lankiness that there is danger. The girl doesn't look to be much either except for the danger glinting in her pretty eyes. Right away I know that sponsors will be falling all over her because she is so pretty with her long blonde hair and thick lips. But I also know that looks can only get you so far in the arena.
District 2 poses the biggest threat to me. The boy, Cato, is tall and muscular like Gale but has fair skin and blonde hair like Peeta. Just by watching the video, I can see the confidence and strength in his walk and can already guess that he is going to be very skilled with weapons. Also, the fact that he volunteered himself is sign that he is someone who should be considered dangerous—especially since he's from district 2. Cameras provide us with a close up of his face and I can see the deadliness in them- killing to him is no big thing. The girl is similar to the boy in this area, one look at her eyes and you can see death in them. She has olive skin and dark hair and is average height for a girl but you can see her toned muscles and I know that facing her in a hand to hand fight would be tough.
The last two tributes to stick with me are the ones from district 11 but not because they are intimidating or anything like that. They both have dark skin and a gentle look in their eyes which is the reason why I can't seem to get them out of my mind. My heart goes out to them for being put it into this insufferable position. The boy is big- bigger than any of the tributes and his muscles are huge but the look in his eyes is so sweet that I just know he wasn't a born killer. Watching the girl is hard for me and in the end I have to get up and leave, not being able to watch it. She is a tiny thing that walks about on her tippy toes as if any moment she would simply take off and fly away. Her age (she has to be 12) and smallness has me thinking of Prim and my heart breaks for this little girl who had no one to volunteer for her.
Leaving Haymitch and Gale to talk about strategies; I steal away to the bar car, looking for an escape from all the anxiety. I am disappointed to see that Haymitch has definitely been here- all the alcohol is gone. I slump down against the wall and place my head in my hands. I am ashamed that I came in here looking for an escape—I really need to be stronger than this but the amount of stress that I feel on my shoulders is threatening to take me down. Today has been the longest day in all my life- even longer than the day that my dad died. I shut my eyes against the memories playing behind my eyes and breathe deeply, fighting them off. I am not going to go there. The crash of thunder outside the train takes me to a different memory instead.
It is cold-so cold and my stomach clenches in pain. Rain pours down onto my head and lightening streaks the sky followed closely by the crashing of thunder. I struggle through the muddy streets of district 12 searching for food in gutters and piles of trash. I am so hungry that I'm even looking in pig troughs— they are all empty. After checking the baker's pig trough, and finding it empty, I sink underneath a nearby tree and lean against its scratchy bark. My mind flits to Prim. I need to find food for her. I don't know how much longer I can stand hearing her cry because she's hungry. Just then I hear a great crash and my head whips to look at the bakery door from where the crash had come from. A little boy is being pushed out the door—it is Peeta—a boy that is in my grade, his cheek is swollen and I can see the outline of a hand on it. In his hands, he is holding two burned loaves bread. My stomach gurgles at the sight. He breaks off the burnt parts and throws it to the pigs. I'm not sure what alerts him to me but suddenly he is looking at me. He glances back at the bakery then turns to look at me again, our eyes meeting through all the rain. Quickly he throws the rest of the bread; it lands in a puddle near my feet. At first all I can do is stare at it—not believing my good fortune then I'm scrambling to grab it before any more damage can be done to it. When I look back up to thank him, Peeta is gone.
Light fills the car and another crash of thunder fills my ears. I lean my head against the wall and let out a deep sigh. Peeta. I'm not quite sure what to think about Peeta. He has feelings for me... That's- interesting. I mean I do like him, he saved me all those years ago but I definitely don't have feelings for him. I don't even know him—I know about him but I don't know him. A pain settles in my heart at the lost opportunity. Stupid hunger games.
Light spills into the bar car once again but this time from the hall light and I jump at little as Gale enters and sits next to me on the floor. He doesn't try to put his arm around me and I'm grateful for that. Ever since this whole thing started, he has been hugging me a little too much for my taste. I mean, we're only friends after all.
"Whatcha thinking about, Catnip?"
I sigh slowly, dragging the breath out until it feels like my lungs have completely deflated. "Someone who saved my life once and that I never properly thanked."
Gale sits next to me for a while, not knowing what to say, before he gets up and pulls me up with him. "Hey now, no more negative thoughts. Let's go back. Haymitch is gone and we'll have the car to ourselves. I'm sure we could find some good Capitol propaganda on the TV."
I let out a small laugh and follow behind him, my thoughts wandering back to Peeta. I wish there was a way I could go back to when Peeta had come to visit me. I'd thank him for so much more than just promising to take care of my sister. He took care of me, he changed my whole entire life and he doesn't even know it. I'd tell him just how much that bread meant to me and how much I regretted wasting all this time when I could have spent it getting to know the boy with the bread better.
That night, as the train raced towards the Capitol, Gale and I sat up talking. Not about the arena or anything important- just talking like we did back in district 12 when we spent our days hunting in the woods. When morning came, Effie found me spread out on the couch; my head cradled in Gale's lap, his hand gently resting upon my hair. His head was titled back over the couch, snoring softly.
"Up, up, up you lazy heads! Today is a big, big day! If we are on schedule, we should be arriving to the capitol within the hour. Let's get some breakfast in your stomachs because once we get there you two are going to be busy, busy, busy!"
I shoot up off of Gale's lap, a blush staining my cheeks. I glance down at him to see him rubbing sleep out of his eyes. I take a step bad from the couch. Today is the day. The day that bring me into the lions' den. I shake my head at the ominous thoughts. "None of that, Katniss," I think to myself. "If you're going to win this for Prim, no more of these negative thoughts."
With one more glance at gale, I leave to go to my room to get ready.