The living room had a dim light, it was about 6 o'clock of what it felt like a summer day, pretty much unusual for a day like this in the rainy England. It felt somehow comfortable being around her family, the mess kids did with all the toys, a huge bookshelf where anyone could loose their mind finding the best of the best authors to read anytime, anywhere. And Sarah Vaughan playing in the background so low that the most inattentive person wouldn't notice.

"Do you want to watch a movie tonight?" Andrew asked, with a slightly nervous tone in his voice. He was looking for Cate, trying to mend the gaps between them. They were not angry at each other, it was just these huge silence that bothered him, they didn't know what to communicate to each other, there was nothing to say anymore. Nothing concrete happened, it was only the years between them and all the post Carol situation that wasn't solved in their minds. Yet. Is there going to be a time when we're going to have peace with each other? Andrew wondered to himself.

"What movie do you want to watch? With the kids? Without the kids? Before dinner? After dinner? Why everything is so complicated...! Oh well..." In the end Cate smiled with a certain tone. She wasn't in the mood of watching a movie at all, she just wanted to stay steady, maybe read a book, call Rooney and talk about nothing, tell her that she was taking care of the plans just as they talked, she would be in New York soon, they would talk about what happened some months before and clear the air between them.

There was an uncomfortable atmosphere between Andrew and her, but they got use to it, they were so troubled and deepen in their issues that it was difficult to regain trust, desire, passion. Even though they loved it each other very much and they had that sense of family which brought gratitude, care and love. They were all of them a huge pack, a successful one, always joking at the dinner table. But the intimacy that they once shared had vanished and they didn't even know how.

"I guess I'll spend the evening working once the kids are in bed" Andrew stated.

"Ok." Cate got up and checked her phone. She was thinking about calling Rooney. Maybe text her. Was that a good idea? Why do I always think so much about these things? Thinking is just anti ethical when comes to love... Love? Is this love? Am I still in love with her? After all that happened when we were shooting Carol, after we shot Carol, when we were promoting Carol and then the Oscars. Cate didn't even want to think about those days in Los Angeles with Rooney. It was so painful. She just thought they didn't deserve that kind of ending. And that's why she insisted in calling her. Now. All of a sudden Cate found herself very emotional, thinking about all the intense moments they have lived the past two years. And how to overcome that heavy heavy situation they shared. Calling is not a good idea. We shouldn't talk over the phone. I just want to see her. And then we can talk. But what about a text...just a short one..

She started typing. And felt amused and excited about it, just like a crazy in love adolescent.

"Hi..." She deleted. How should she adress Rooney?

"Hello Rooney.." No, too formal

"Hi darling, how are you? too sweet...but I am sweet...hmmm

"Rooney, I hope you're well. I want you to know that I'm planning everything as we spoke. I'm arriving in NYC june 7th, the tony's are on sunday and then I leave to LA on Monday. I was thinking about renting an apartment on the upper east side, not distant from yours. Please let me know your thoughts on this. x"

"Mommy, can you tell us a story, pleeeease?"

"Of course monkey, let's do it so you can sleep the best of sleeps" While Cate was entertaining the kids with bedtime stories, Rooney called two times. Andrew heard, but didn't bother.

When she got back to her phone half an hour later, she had two missed calls and 4 texts from Rooney, who seemed anxious about the situation.

"Cate. Hi. What are you going to do in LA? I might go there also that week."

"7th is great!"

"About the apartment, I was thinking that you might want to stay with me, as we talked, didn't we? But if you want to be on your own, I totally understand. But there's two rooms here if you want to stay way from me under the same roof"

"I hope you're well to, honestly, and I'm looking forward to be with you and talk things up".

Suddenly Cate had a huge smile on her face. She could just imagine Rooney feeling insecure and equally impulsive. Writing on the phone just as she thought. Her mind emerging in a mix of deep emotions.

"Rooney, my dear, sorry I missed your calls, I was putting the kids to sleep. I'm going to give some thought on what you proposed ;) see you soon"

That warm afternoon evolved in a pleasant evening with a gentle breeze that one could hear in the trees that surrounded the house. Cate decided to seat outside smoking a cigarette and drinking a glass of wine, a routine she liked doing alone. She was filled with this amazing expectation, in just three weeks she was meeting Rooney, in NY. For now it was that feeling that kept her heart beating fast. Nothing else. And when our hearts beat faster for someone we should give it some thought, and that's what Cate did through that warm and cosy night.

Meanwhile in NY Rooney was seeing her therapist Rose. She did psycho therapy for quite a long time now, in a weekly basis. Only when she was shooting it got more difficult but they would skype sometimes. Rooney faced therapy as a common thing, since she was an introvert, talking to someone who was a professional, made her more confident, and she could work things through with herself. And everybody in NY attended therapy.

Rose's office just felt like home. It had a long and comfortable carpet that Rooney always wondered if it came from somewhere in the orient. Three comfortable chairs, a chaise-longue probably for those who are in to psycho analysis and two bookshelves, filled with books where she lost her eyes when she was putting her own words together. Rose was warm and quiet, she didn't say much, only when it was really necessary. Rooney knew that everything she said had a huge meaning, and also every silence, every nod. Rose sometimes showed herself more enthusiastic about some topics, but Cate was not one of them.

"Cate called me last week…" It was the first thing Rooney said when she took a seat.

"Oh did she…?"

"She's coming to NY next month, and wondered if I would like to spend some days with her."

Rose was listening attentive.

Rooney explained all the facts, how the call had happened, Kate answering, the talk she had with Cate afterwards. The texts they exchanged a week later. And her thoughts on all of this. The Oscars situation was not mended yet, she was heartfelt by all of that but she assumed Cate was the one to be angry and sad, towards Rooney's attitude.

"Oh Rooney please, don't be so hard on yourself. We act according to what we are feeling in the moment, and what Cate and you lived was not easy. You have to be easier on yourself but always consider the consequences of your actions."

They were analysing all the situation for an hour. And Rooney felt lighter when she left Rose's. One thing she knew, there was nothing else she wanted now other then being with Cate. She started to make plans. I'm going to take her to that Italian restaurant.

Love lightens the heaviest load.