Disclaimer: To Be Human is a fanfiction written in the Compilation of FFVII, with respect to the original canon and in accordance with the permissions of Fair Use as a transformative work. No profit is being made and the author only claims original characters used within to help flesh out the story.

AN: As the current commenters can tell you, I try to reply to everyone, so don't think your comments/questions will go unanswered! The fic is ready to take off roaring, first chapter after the prologue. Enjoy

Shoutout to LadyNightRunner as my hard working beta and primary sounding board.

It shouldn't have been an even fight. Somewhere in the back of his mind, Zack knew he hadn't gotten so good he should be able to match one of the legendary trio blow for blow, but he couldn't complain about something keeping him alive. As for Genesis… it was like watching him dying in slow motion every time they met. Red hair had dulled and darkened, streaked with an unhealthy gray, his skin taking on a sallow cast and his eyes… his eyes were overly bright, fever bright, with the fanatic gleam of one who wasn't quite right in the head.

Genesis Rhapsodos was falling apart, body and mind degrading, and all Zack could do was try desperately to reason with him, even as they fought. He tried not to think about how Hollander had said both he and Angeal were degrading, because that was just too much. It hurt, watching Genesis lose himself to illness, and he hadn't even known him before. To lose Angeal the same way….

A flash of magic roared by his ear -

'Zack, focus'

- and he jerked back, both at the echo of his mentor and the fact that he really needed to not get lost in his thoughts in the middle of a battle. That the fire hadn't hit him dead on was luck he couldn't afford to count on. No one was coming to save him, he had to finish this himself.

Briefly, he wondered if some part of Genesis, some sane part buried deep inside, understood who he was and what he was trying to do. Wondered if maybe it wasn't luck that had him coming through these fights with nothing but bruises and shallow cuts to show for it. But he couldn't think on it, not when the older SOLDIER was launching across the floor with his wing spread wide and power burning in his blade. The exchange between them grew quick, desperate. Sword to sword. Fire to barrier. Snarls and growls and gasps-

And then a sweeping kick caught Genesis across the chest, sending him skidding back and dropping him to his knees with a wheezing gasp. Zack approached hesitantly, gripping his sword tighter as the swordmage forced himself upright, staggering a moment. But it was too much to maintain, and Genesis collapsed again with a low groan. He didn't seem ready to get back up, speaking breathlessly.

"Dreams of the morrow hath the shattered soul," he managed, breathing hard. There might have been sweat beading his brow, but Zack didn't dare get close enough to see yet. "Pride is lost. Wings stripped away, the end is nigh… such is the fate of a monster."

There weren't words for how sick Zack was of that word. "We're not monsters, you hear me? We're SOLDIER! Where's your honor? Your pride? You can't… you can't keep doing this, Genesis."

Genesis gave a huff of a laugh, lips twisted in a wry smirk as he forced himself up, panting softly at the exertion. "You are... most definitely... his puppy."

Zack felt himself flush, scowling, but now wasn't the time to argue that. "Genesis, you have to stop this. You're not… you're not a monster, you need to quit acting like it, before the company-"

"Kills me?" His laugh was more clear now as he edged away, limping slightly with that same little mocking quirk to his lips. "Even if the morrow is barren of promises, nothing will forestall my return."

A single beat of his wing had him airborne, enough for him to land on the railing, an arm spread out in a dramatic gesture that filled Zack with a sense of terrible foreboding. "If this world seeks my destruction… it goes with me."

Instinct proved right, and the dying SOLDIER was letting himself fall back before Zack could do more than reach out instinctively.

"GENESIS!"

Zack ran to the edge of the platform, gripping the railing and staring down into the dark drop below. He couldn't see the bottom, though there had to be one; it was so far… could even a SOLDIER First survive? Despite the admittedly really odd wing, Zack remained firm in the belief that Genesis was human. Insane, probably, but human.

Swallowing hard, the new First looked away and closed his eyes. There was a lot he didn't know, more than he liked to admit. ShinRa… ShinRa was losing his faith, fast, but he still believed it was the best place he could be to help people. And the only place he could be to help Angeal and Sephiroth. He'd wanted to help Genesis too, but….

He opened his eyes slowly, looking down into the yawning blackness again and shaking his head sadly. Even if Genesis survived, he was beyond Zack's reach now. But maybe he could still help Angeal. Maybe, maybe, this wouldn't be a complete loss. He didn't want to come back to Sephiroth empty handed again.

Feeling a swell of determination, Zack nodded firmly and turned to head back into the bitter chill. A quick glance showed Cloud and Tseng were gone, likely heading forward through the old rail tunnel to Modeoheim proper. There wasn't much left to look through, as far as he knew; just some abandoned buildings and an old bathhouse up ahead. If Angeal was still here, that was where he'd be. This time, he would reach his mentor, make him understand. He would.

He had to.

As the teenager made his way back into the snow, wind howling around him, he missed the soft footsteps behind him. Black boots came to a stop at the railing, gloved fingertips grazing the metal thoughtfully. It was indeed a long way to fall, but Zack would learn not to underestimate Genesis' will to live even now. Even in the face of his mind and body failing him more and more, enough of the fiery SOLDIER's stubborn core remained to fight for his life. For now, that would have to do.

Glowing eyes turned towards the exit, contemplating what lay ahead. Or rather, who. Because if Hollander was correct, if Angeal was also degrading, then his sanity was also in question no matter how sane he may have appeared. But his was a quieter madness, perhaps all the more dangerous for it. Though usually slow to violence, when Angeal did slip, the destruction he could cause….

No, never mind his own feelings on the matter, Zack could not be allowed to face Angeal alone. He was extremely talented, but no match for the years of experience and sheer strength of the rogue First. Angeal would control the fight, and he no longer trusted where the man might take it.

There was no sign of Angeal in the abandoned settlement. Boarded up houses and old crates reflected nothing but years of neglect - a lot of years, if Kunsel's mail was right. And really, Zack needed to talk with his friend about his snooping problem before he ticked off the Turks or something. Tseng seemed nice enough, but seriously, the guy went through graves like another day at the office. And from how he talked about it, it might as well have been. That was not the kind of person you wanted to be on the bad side of.

Sighing quietly, Zack eyed the single place that looked like it might have seen use sometime in the last decade and admitted there was no avoiding it. The derelict bathhouse was the only remaining place Angeal could be, and hopefully where Tseng and Cloud had headed. If nothing else, it was out of the elements. Cold still, and had a notable monster problem, but nothing he couldn't handle. A bizarre bug could be taken down with a strong swat of his sword, a series of slices if they mobbed him in groups, and did nothing but waste his time.

Maybe that was why the griffin was a surprise, fierce and white winged with the mutations that had to have come from Angeal somehow. It took more effort to beat, and for a long moment after he stared at the strange mockery of Angeal's face where its own should have been. One of his monsters… Angeal had been there, at least. Whether he still was or not remained to be seen, but it was something like a good sign, right?

Zack's optimism flagged when he got up the stairs, finding Cloud red faced and sprawled on the ground. Blue eyes were blinking owlishly in the way people seemed to when they were trying to focus, but he was together enough to try and get upright when his name was called. "Nghh… Zack? We're alright. The Turk…"

Zack followed the line of sight from his friend's hand, frown deepening. "I'll check, just get your bearings. Tseng?"

Dark eyes found focus far quicker, Tseng ever a professional even slumped against the wall with an arm bracing his abdomen. His first attempt at greeting him was rough and he dipped his head away with a politely restrained cough before trying again. "I'll be fine. You need to go on ahead and secure Hollander before he finds some way to escape again."

The First nodded, scowling at the thought; how the seemingly out of shape man could move so fast was mind boggling, and he certainly didn't want to give him any more advantage. He fished a restorative potion out of his pack, offering it. "Here, I figure you guys'll still be heading our way."

"I'm equipped," he was assured instead, the Turk gesturing for him to keep it. "You may need it, Zack. Angeal's waiting for you."

The implication that his mentor might force a fight on him was neither lost nor denied. No, after the first time Angeal had attacked him, even when he refused to fight, Zack wasn't going to put it past him. And if he'd done this… well, he wasn't going to ask. It wouldn't help.

He put the potion away, rising smoothly and looking ahead with a grim expression. "Alright. I'll see you two when you catch up."

He didn't want to face Angeal, not like this, but he wanted to face him with an audience even less. If he didn't feel pressured, didn't feel judged… maybe he could get him to come back. At least to Midgar. There had to be a way. There had to be something he could say, or do, or something to get Angeal to understand it didn't have to be this way. That this wasn't the solution, they needed to fight these battles together. And okay, maybe ShinRa was not the good place he'd thought it was, but they were SOLDIER and that had to mean something. He refused to think that the man who had drilled him on dreams and pride and honor could just walk away from all of it.

When Zack finally found Angeal, the man had his back to him. Still dressed in SOLDIER blacks, white wings out and Buster sword in hand. It wasn't the most encouraging picture, and for a moment despair warred with a burst of frustration. "Angeal."

The wings flicked a little, the only immediate acknowledgment. When Zack came around into his line of sight, Angeal finally spoke. "It should have been me, dealing with Genesis."

"And who do you think took care of that?" He hadn't meant to snap, but damn it, really? If his mentor was going to own up to that much, he could at least toss in an apology!

"Consider it preparation for your next fight, then."

Oh no.

Angeal turned to face him, raising the Buster sword to point directly at him.

No no no. "Have you lost it?"

He swung, damn it he swung, and Zack dodged out of the way, holding up a hand. "Stop it!"

"You have someone waiting don't you?"

I hope your friend's alright…

Zack grit his teeth and slowly took his sword off his back, eyes never leaving Angeal's. "Don't do this."

There was something in his eyes, something wrong. The wild way he was swinging his blade was nothing like the swordsman who had plucked Zack out of the ranks and taught him what it meant to be SOLDIER. They were matching blows, hard enough to rattle Zack's bones, but he had his blade in both hands and Angeal only needed one, even now. Something about that… he was missing something, if he just had a moment to think… but then Angeal had his blade pinned, their points to the ground.

What would have happened next he was probably better off not knowing, their short battle interrupted by a familiar gravelly voice. "Very good, Angeal. It's time to exact vengeance for our family's suffering."

"Family?" Zack stared at Angeal, incredulous. Surely he didn't mean…?

"No!" Angeal ripped his sword away, sending the younger First spinning aside in an effort to keep his own. "My father is dead!"

Okay, there was definitely an issue here. Zack looked between the pair, Angeal's wild eyes and fierce glare, Hollander far too calm but a bit more cautious now. Coaxing. "Then do it for your mother."

"My mother was so ashamed she took her own life." Angeal snarled, grief thick in his voice, and Zack choked back a sound of horror. He hadn't known… gods, and he'd just assumed….

"That's ridiculous - she should have been proud; she was the namesake of our experiment." Hollander informed them, a little smile on his lips. "Project G - or rather, Project Gillian."

Angeal was on him so fast his wings rustled, taking a handful of his shirt in one clenched fist and lifting him a little off the ground. The grief was darkened by anger, blue eyes gaining the faintest ring of green. "Don't say her name."

Hollander rested a hand on Angeal's wrist, pushing until he was let down. "She was infused with Jenova cells, her genes mapped onto Genesis while he was a fetus. And yes, I admit, he failed. But you? You were her son, Angeal, from her womb - you are perfect."

Angeal snarled again, shoving the man harshly and turning away from them both. "I am a perfect monster. My cells can absorb genetic traits, pass them along -"

"A two-way conduit, as we'd hoped." Hollander added, heaving himself up. "Jenova's power is completely passed on."

Angeal gave him a look of disgust, not bothering to address him before turning to Zack again. There was loathing in his eyes, not just for Hollander, and a plea that he was afraid to understand. "Do you remember what I said? About our enemy?"

"All that creates suffering," he muttered, remembering all too clearly, and shook his head. "You're not one of them!"

Angeal gave him a pained look, backing away. "I'll show you."

Even as he turned to watch him, Hollander made a frantic sound. "Stop it, you don't understand! If you do this, you can't go back-"

Angeal lifted a hand, walking back further, and suddenly several of his monsters - clones? - were there, crouched and ready to spring.

"They're just cells!" Hollander lunged at him, but Zack was too busy readying his sword to fight off the creatures to pay attention, even when he heard the heavy thump that was undoubtedly his body hitting the ground.

Then the creatures charged - past Zack - and he had a moment of terrible clarity. "ANGEAL!"

A flash of blue light cut across his vision, across the room, across the monsters, and they jerked to a halt, sliced cleanly in half before they could reach Angeal. For a moment, they all stared, uncomprehending, before a familiar baritone cut the silence just as sharply.

"Coward."

A/N: As I'm sure you've noticed, that's the snip from AW - now everything's new. Be sure to keep me updated on your thoughts, I'll see you next week!