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She'd spent most of yesterday either in bed or the bathroom, work was completely out of the question and she was yet to tell Andrew the truth. All she had managed to say to him was she wasn't feeling well and tried to tell him she was pregnant but rather than understand what she was trying to tell him he assumed it was her time of the month and had decided he'd take care of the kids whilst she took the day off. She'd quickly lost the guts to tell him the real reason she felt so sick. Thankfully today was her day off but she only felt worse, she wanted nothing more than to stay in bed all day but she had stuff to do and kids to look after. With Andrew on a late shift she had no one to fall back on but then again she had no one to get suspicious of her either. As for her own feelings on the pregnancy she was still in panic mode so to speak. Her pregnancy with Jake had gone very similar to her pregnancy with Peter, problem free bar bad morning sickness so that didn't concern her but when it came to the birth they were worlds apart. With Peter she had a textbook labour and birth, no problems just long and painful but with Jake her labour lasted days not hours and then she retained the placenta and haemorrhaged badly which was something they'd kept to themselves. They'd quickly decided not to have more children and let their friends and family believe it was because she was in labour so long and not let them know about the complications afterwards. What scared her now was she was 40 now and that came with even more risks, she wasn't sure she could get through all that again. It wasn't only that that scared her if she were honest that was the least of her concerns. Her overriding concern was how Andrew was going to react, another baby at their ages? He was 46 for christ sake! He made no secret in telling her how much he enjoyed the boys at their current ages, now they were more independent giving him more time to return to climbing the career ladder. He'd held a consultants post once before when the boys were really young but it just didn't work out with family life, he never seen them and finally realised he wasn't bonding with either of his sons. Despite changing his job Andrew was still never much of a home body having got himself involved in various groups and clubs including the council and anytime he was around to do activities with the boys it was hiking, fishing, camping, swimming or something equally impossible to do with a baby. He'd recently started talking about taking the boys skiing or snowboarding next year not that she was too keen on the idea. She wasn't even going to think of all the time he'd spent with his mistress over the kids as well in the past, not that she was a hundred percent convinced he'd ended it like he'd promised. How could she really know? He was right she did often complain she never seen him but she had meant him to give up at least one of his groups or clubs to spend time with her and the boys not move hospitals. A baby did not fit in his plan at all. She was terrified he'd shut her and the baby out leaving her to cope with the kids alone, not that he helped out that much in the first place but having two kids was very different to having three. Of course another baby didn't fit in her plan either. Her boys were in school and Peter was nearly a teenager, her mind was too busy worrying about how she'd cope with that stage to even consider going back to the baby stage again and doing both seemed petrifying. She enjoyed the one on one time she was able to give her boys and how simple it was to do activities they enjoyed with them since they weren't too far apart in ages. That however would all change with another baby, by then Peter would be 11 and Jake 7 and although Jake was still very young himself he enjoyed to do whatever his older brother was doing. Seven years between kids seemed far too long although she knew it wasn't that bad and maybe if she was in her early to mid thirties she'd have no problem but not now. Of course work was playing on her mind as well, Andrew strongly believed she should be a stay at home mum when the boys were small and he'd expect the same again but she couldn't do it. She loved her kids but she needed her job, she was a better mum when she worked. As if to stop her from thinking of anymore reasons to panic the doorbell pulled her from her thoughts. Forcing herself off the couch she ignored the warm rush to her head and instead continued to the door.

"Oh Hi mum, I wasn't expecting you."

Instead of smiling back at her daughter her face turned to concern. Lisa of course had naturally very pale skin but this was something all together different. She wasn't holding herself right either. Something was wrong. Kate of course knew better than to quiz her daughter on the doorstep, that was something for inside.

"I was visiting Caroline and thought I'd drop in."

Stepping aside she allows her mum to enter the house whilst wishing her mum hadn't come round. She wasn't at all sure she was up for any kind of conversation with her more so since it so often turned into an argument.

"Oh right. Tea?"

—X—

Some time later her mum was still in the house although now she was talking to the boys about god knows what whilst she tried to force herself to make the dinner. Oh how she'd forgot how much she struggled with the overpowering smell of the kitchen at this stage. Running the tap to get a glass of water she takes ahold of the unit whilst trying to take deep breaths to hopefully prevent herself from throwing up. As if on cue her mother comes up quietly behind her having only intended to help her out but now seeing her hunched over the sink she began to really worry. If she was this sick why wasn't she in bed?

"Lisa?" Placing a hand on her back she rubs it slightly. "You should be in bed."

Finally able to stand up she grabs the glass of water and tries to sound stronger than she felt.

"I'm fine mum. It's just a bug I'm getting over." She didn't want her to know, not yet."I need to get dinner sorted."

Watching her daughter continue round the kitchen she wasn't convinced, not at all.

"Fine, if you're sure. I'll help."

Heading to the fridge having asked earlier what she was making she takes out the chicken and hands the packet to her daughter whilst taking out the onions and various other vegetables. Whilst she sorts the chicken, which smelt terrible, her mum picks the counter next to her to cut the onion. Not onion. Why did she pick this recipe? What was she thinking? Instant nausea overtook her again and this time it wasn't going to go away with deep breaths. Watching Lisa rush off, a hand over her mouth, at first she was just confused then as she look down at the food it hit her. It wasn't a bug, it was the smell of the food and there was only one reason her daughter ever got like that. Placing down the knife she slowly follows her to the downstairs bathroom where she knocks on the door.

"Lisa?" No answer. "Lisa? Come on you're worrying me."

After what seemed like too long the door opens for her to go in. Smiling sadly she shuts the door behind her, locking it so the boys didn't get in. Duffy was sat on the edge of the bath staring at her mum.

"How far gone are you then?" She knew she'd figured it out, her mum was near enough impossible to hide anything from.

"Seven weeks." Before Kate could even continue she guessed her next question. "Before you ask Andrew doesn't know."

"What? Why not?"

Her daughters chest was quickly rising and falling, she was panicking.

"I can't."

Stepping forward she didn't know where this reaction was coming from, why was she in such a state?

"You have to. You can hardly hide this from him. He will notice eventually Lisa." Shaking her head she began to cry, giving in to her tears.

"It will finish us mum." Sitting next to her she begins to rub her shoulder, trying to calm her down despite not liking her daughters husband in the slightest. He was an arrogant shit.

"You're overthinking this Lisa, he loves the boys why would he react so badly to another?"

She knew what her mum was doing, or trying to do. Kate never hid the fact she didn't like Andrew, she watched him her hurt her once too often and never really be there for her grandsons. Lisa could do better than him but she loved him for some reason and there was no getting through to her.

"Don't mum. I know you don't like him. He's never here, I can't cope with another baby on my own."

Taking her daughter into a hug she once more told her she was overthinking it all and prayed she was correct, she wasn't sure she could watch Andrew hurt her again.