Adrian Veidt, The Insiduous Body-Switcher!
Chapter 2: I'm a father?
October 13, 1985
"Now, just try and stay cool," said Eddie.
"Hurm," replied Rorschach.
"Also, don't say 'Hurm'. That's my job," said Eddie.
"Habit," said Rorschach.
"All right, just don't say anything unless you need to, okay, buddy? Okay," said Eddie. "I'll do the talking."
They had gone up to a dingy-looking bar in a grungy, run-down neighborhood.
"Some job," said Rorschach sarcastically.
"Minimum wage," replied Eddie.
When both of them had entered the establishment, a woman in her mid-twenties rushed out and embraced Rorschach with great gusto.
"Eddie!" she said warmly. "How've you been? You look horrible!"
Rorschach was thinking, Must not break fingers... must not break fingers... act like Comedian...
"Been fine," replied Rorschach with a nod.
Lucky man, thought Eddie. He felt a pang of jealousy, but what else could he do? Explain they switched bodies?
"I'm his buddy," said Eddie. Rorschach's face was the happiest it had been in forty years.
"Pee-yoo, you stink," said Eddie's girlfriend.
Must not break fingers... must not break fingers... thought poor Rorschach, who might have exploded into a fit of rage if Eddie's girlfriend didn't say the next thing.
"Guess what, Eddie! I'm pregnant!"
There are no words to describe how shocked, alarmed, and disquieted Rorschach felt at that time. He was stunned.
And now, we need to have our bodies back, thought Eddie.
"Hurm," said Rorschach, without thinking. "Should be... nice," he lied.
"'Hurm'?" asked Eddie's girlfriend, giggling. "Where'd you get that from? And, anyway, are you okay? You're not acting like yourself."
"He's just stunned," said Eddie. "He's a proud father."
Rorschach wasn't sure who to direct his anger at. He hated women, and he thought the Comedian shouldn't have knocked her up, but they had been blissfully unaware about the possibility of body-switching. Eddie and she had been prepared for this for a long time. Rorschach was not. So, he decided to direct his anger at Veidt. He let the hate run through him until he accidentally knocked over a table.
"Jesus Christ!" shouted Eddie's girlfriend. "What's your problem? This baby was planned! Change your mind at the last minute?"
"He'll be okay," said Eddie. "He's just... a little shaken up."
"Hurm," said Rorschach angrily. "Not angry at either of you. Angry at someone else."
"Oh," said Eddie's girlfriend, understanding. "I see. Well, take it easy, okay? I have to go to work. Bye!"
She left.
"Jesus Christ, man, do you want me to get thrown out of this place?" demanded Eddie. "You're pretty damn lucky the manager's my friend!"
"Why?" asked Rorschach, unapologetic.
"Why'd I knock her up? Because I love her. I love her to the bottom of my heart. I'm sorry if you don't understand, but it's true," said Eddie.
"Hurm," said Rorschach, his head in his hands. Was he... crying? Yes, yes, he was.
"We'll catch Veidt. Don't worry," said Eddie.
Suddenly, he heard the sound of a trigger being pulled.
"Caught," said Rorschach resignedly.
"Yeah, buddy. Looks like we are," said Eddie.
A gunman was already putting them in handcuffs, and threw them into the back of a van.
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