Life is a bitch. There are times in life when that is all that you can really say, and since those times have been rather frequent for me, I figured that I'd best establish it early on. Life is a bitch, but then so am I sometimes, in more ways you know.

You've asked me to tell my part of the story. Wait, no...that gives you more credit than you've earned, because you didn't ask me. You asked Jamie and he asked me. It's ok that you did. I'm not going to yell at you or anything, because you might have asked me yourself if you'd known that I'd be able to tell you anything worth hearing.

I don't have some cheesy monologue about second chances and whether or not people think we should get them. Unlike Jamie, my mother didn't read me Shakespeare for bedtime stories. Jamie, his brother, and his father, are the only long winded, flowery word spouting, white men that I've had to deal with for long periods of time. The pack helped to ward off their influence. Besides, I really couldn't care less about how much happiness people think that I have a right to. If women like me in stories have played the martyr, the shrew, the penitent, or the freaking clarinet, it's no business of mine.

So let's get down to business. You asked Jamie, who in turn asked me to help tell a story. Jamie, like the long winded fool that he is, has probably forgotten to make time for introductions the lines of his monologue, so I'll do it for him. I am Leah, the only female member of the pack at La Push; you are a nosy, but so far harmless, visitor; and life, well… life was being more of a bitch than usual, to both Jamie and me, when my bit of the story began.

"Come on, Leah! We're going to be late, and Sam is going to be angry, not to mention Mom and the elders," my brother yelled from downstairs.

"Then we really should get going! It would bother me so much to upset Sam," I muttered sarcastically before yelling back, "I'll be down in a minute! Be a good little puppy and sit!"

I pulled a t-shirt over my head and straightened up before running downstairs, grabbing a backpack with spare clothes in case I lost control, and pulling Seth out of the door by his hand. We met up with the other members of the pack and Sam as they walked over to the fire pit where we would meet with the Watchers and the elders, falling in line.

"They're nearly here. Take your places," Old Quil directed. We settled, forming a half circle on the side of the fire pit that was further into the reservation and a moment later a car pulled up, followed closely by Izzy and a boy that I hadn't met before on her motor bike.

Mr. and Mrs. Stevens got out of the car and met in front of it as Jack and Izzy met by the passenger side door and lined up in front of them, leading them over to us. When they reached their side of the pit their line split in half, Jack and Izzy moving closer to the elders and his parents hanging back. The other boy fell into the place on the opposite end of their half, looking lonely and slightly out of place.

"We welcome you, as always to our home," my mother started. "May I ask who it is that you've brought with you?"

Jack replied politely, " That is my brother, Jamie. He is…a special case. For reasons that are his own to disclose, he takes more of a supporting role in our dealings. His presence changes nothing and the only reason that you haven't met before is that he was away at school during our last meetings."

The conversation continued but I let my mind wander, observing the boy, Jamie. He was standing not far from me and he held himself awkwardly, as though feeling out of place or missing something important. He'd winced visibly as his brother essentially told the elders that he was harmless, if not useless, and then he'd appeared to get lost inside his head.

At first glance he looked a lot like his brother. Both were slim and had blond hair and green eyes, but on closer inspection I noticed that Jamie's hair was a dirtier blond, with streaks of other tones mixed in. Jamie was also more toned and I could see lines in his face that his brother hadn't had experience or pain enough to create. There were also the scars in his arms, thin ones mostly. Izzy likely never mentioned them to you, because she sees Jamie as her brother and she doesn't like to think about where they came from, but they are there; trust me. They had me wondering about them from the first sight.

After a moment, or several, he climbed back out of his head and I watch as his eyes focused on Izzy. Was she the reason why he'd been shunted into a "supporting role"? Had he been Jack's partner before Izzy came along? Had he been betrayed like I had?

It was an assumption, and a wrong one at that, but in my defense, the emotions in his eyes seemed to confirm my story. Resentment, pain, both were present in his eyes as he looked at her. For some reason I liked the idea of having a kindred spirit.

"What are you staring at?"

I jumped slightly. He had turned and spoken to me while I'd been distracted. I responded defensively out of habit.

"Not much I guess, if the best your own brother could do to describe your worth was to call you 'supportive', " I sneered.

"Well then I guess you must be easily entertained, because you've been staring at 'not much' for nearly a quarter of an hour. I may be on the bench, but I'm still a Watcher. Did you think that I wouldn't notice," he snapped back.

"Well sorry to burst your bubble, Sidekick, but I don't think much of you at all," I replied taking a step toward him. A hand on my arm stopped me. It was Seth.

"Don't do this Leah. Come on, I think that we could hear what they're saying better from over there," he said pointing toward a spot near where Sam and the elders stood talking with the Watchers. At nearly the same moment Mr. Stevens walked over and stood behind him for a moment. Jamie rolled his eyes before turning and walking to stand closer to his parents. I followed Seth to a spot closer to the others, glancing over at Jamie from my new position. I saw his mother hand him a note pad and some paper and a moment later, after I looked away, a paper airplane hit me in the head. I unfolded it to find a note.

"You make for a bad spy."

I studiously avoided watching him for the rest of formal part of the meeting. Later, when business had apparently been taken care of, Jack led Izzy and his brother over to us to hang out, and get to know each other.

They made their rounds through the pack, telling everyone hello and giving Jamie and Izzy a run down on us, and pointing out things that were shared, like Izzy's apparent love of Wolverine from the x-men movies. When they got to me he didn't have some cutesy factoid to offer. I kept to myself a lot. Jack was an ok person but my life was weird enough without adding in a friend from a family of creature stalking outsiders with hero complexes.

Despite Jack's lack of knowledge concerning me, Izzy and I hit it off pretty well. She looked me square in the eyes and despite her current happiness I could see the remnants of something familiar. Then she spoke and I figured that I might have to retract may statement about being friends with creature stalking outsiders.

"So I've met the fearless leader, the jocks, and the friendly and good natured types, which would make you what? The assassin," She asked honestly but with some humor in her voice.

"More like the woman scorned, but then, I'm not sure there's much of a difference some days so…" I trailed off with a shrug.

"We should hang out some time, maybe go for lunch? I'm not too far out from being a woman scorned myself and between all the fairytale stuff and that well… I don't know about you but I'm kind of short on people who can relate and who could whine with me over a good meal. A bunch of the other girls who know about everything don't, you know... eat," she said, adding a humorless laugh at the end.

"I might like that. Your dad has our number, or I guess you could just ride with him," I replied evenly. She nodded and moved on.

Jamie had hung back, ostensibly trying to avoid a confrontation, but I noticed a slight warmth in his face as she took his hand and led him back towards the older Stevens. So maybe he wasn't the kindred spirit I'd taken him for? Or maybe he was just putting on some kind of show?

I didn't know what to make of Jamie Stevens.

I watched them ride away a while later, on or in their respective vehicles, before letting Seth pull me along to a thick stand of trees where I could strip out of my clothes and phase in privacy before racing off to patrol the area with Jacob and Seth. For the first instant after the change, I always loved being a wolf. The strength and the power, and the speed were all wonderful.

Then the others changed and my thoughts were swept up into the strange and open expanse of the pack mind. My brother's grief over our father, Jacob's heartache over Izzy's choosing Jack, a dozen private worries, and fantasies that were never mine to know poured into my head and I threw my pain forward like a shield, and summoned their nightmares like a sword to protect the secrets that this form denied me.

Stop it Sis, we've gotta run. It hurts when you do that, Seth's mind yelled. I couldn't hurt my brother, so I let myself get wrapped up in the task of keeping watch over our people, and keeping an eye out for the cold ones.

Whatever, I thought back, let's just hurry. I want my own thoughts back without having to fight for them and God knows how what perverted fantasies I'll pick up from you two this time.

I'd seen too many of the other pack members in compromising situations to feel like adding more experiences to that list.

Later I ran into the stand of trees where I'd left my clothes and phased back before dressing and going home to eat lunch. After that I did some homework and studied for a while before going to the beach and watching the waves.

I stared out at the ocean and remembered days that Sam and I had spent out there, laughing and kissing in the waves, hiding from the prying eyes of the gossips that thought he was some sort of drug addict because he'd disappeared for a few days.

I remembered the warmth of love and of the sun, unfettered by reality, unbound by obligation. I remembered him loving me exclusively. Then I opened my eyes and I was painfully aware of the fact that my dream had died and I was going to be the bridesmaid at his wedding to the woman who'd been my best friend, my favorite cousin.

I already knew that unless something changed, I would have his memories of every moment of bliss they experienced. Sam's mind would send them directly to mine, via the pack mind. And the boys wondered why I hated to phase, why I made them hate it too, sometimes.

I forced myself to stop thinking focusing on the colors that the sunset made on the water as it set.

At home Mom would be grieving and Seth would be sitting somewhere polishing his halo, and since I wasn't really up for either, I sat in the sand for as long as I could before leaving.

I helped make dinner and washed the dishes, and I wondered when we'd learn to have conversations without Dad, or if our house would always be so oppressively silent that deaf people would complain. Thinking about living as a family of three made me hurt inside, but I didn't have much else to think about instead, so I went up to my room to sleep.

In my dreams, I saw Emily through Sam's eyes over and over again, intermingled with a few nightmares of things that hadn't scared me before, and one solitary dream of a day long gone, spent running up and down the beach with our father. Even in his dreams my brother was an angel, letting me see myself with our father, letting me be happy, if only in the long seconds of a dream.

Because life was, and you'll don't have to excuse me for my language, a terrible and spiteful bitch, it was that happy dream that faded first in the morning, leaving me to deal with the bitterness and the fear all on my own.

At the time, I didn't realize that I wasn't the only one having trouble sleeping that night, but you'll hear plenty about that from Jamie. It's his turn to pick up the story now.

And so we have Leah's point of view! Is everyone pretty well informed on Leah's back-story and the situation with her and Sam and Emily? If not don't worry about it, because Jamie'll have to find out about it eventually so you'll get it then if you don't know it all now. (sorry about the repeated use of one swear word by the way, if it bugs anyone too much i'll avoid it in the future)

A lot of what we got about Leah before Breaking Dawn, was from other people and potentially biased so while I'm trying to make sure she stays in character, I may add things for the sake of making her more real.

Thanks to the readers and reviewers, and the (awesome but just a little …) creepy lurking people that read this but never tell me what they think. I am always pleased to hear from you and I worry when you're quiet for too long.

Da future: Back to Jamie's point of view as we follow him back to college learn a few things that will most certainly not be on the test.

I'll try to have it up as soon as possible but it'll likely be about a week.