Note: I am not Stephenie Meyer and I do not own the Twilight series. I just like playing with the characters in them! My first fanfic… enjoy!

Edward's Point of View

Lying across the gold comforter of the California King in my room, listening to soft jazz music seep through the speakers, it was hard to imagine a more comfortable place. But then I remembered how I'd held Bella in my arms last night as she fell asleep, how her eyelids drooped against her will, and the surge of pleasure that shot through me each time she murmured my name in her sleep. Lost in the daydream, I sighed. Perhaps this was the closest I'd ever get to actual sleep.

I was so caught up in my daydreams of Bella that I hardly took notice of Rosalie quietly entering the room. Despite the dim lighting of my room, Rosalie looked stunning—that much was undeniable. Though as much as I admired her unnatural, striking beauty, my thoughts always led me back to Bella. The way her wavy auburn hair glistened in the sunlight. The way she breathed my name between kisses. Even the way she pouted was adorable. I doubted I'd ever seen a more dangerous creature in my life.

"Edward? Terribly sorry to disturb you—can we speak for a moment?" Rosalie asked formally, unwillingly pulling me out of my daydreams.

"Yes, Rosalie. What is it?" I asked, irritated. Leave! Part of my mind exulted, eager to return to more pleasant thoughts of Bella. The more polite, civil part of my mind forced me to compose my face.

Promise me you won't be angry, Edward. She thought to me. I grimaced. Leave it to Rosalie to drag out the suspense. When I didn't answer, she thought to me again. Please. Surprised, I caught the note of desperation in her voice.

I reluctantly sighed. "Spit it out, Rosalie." All formality cast aside.

It's about Bella. I sat up at the mention of my fiancé. She doesn't have to become one of us, you know.

"What do you mean by that?" I asked. The suspense was painful. Rosalie shot me an angry glare before continuing. I mean exactly that, Edward. You know how I feel about Bella becoming a vampire. I supposed I can empathize a bit— I see you had almost no other choice in the matter. But still! For you to give in so willingly is egregious…She ranted. Realizing I had tuned her out, she gave an impatient sigh before continuing. Anyways, I found something you may be interested in.

Rosalie tossed me a hardback book which I lithely caught. From the looks of it, this book looked over a century old. The pages were battered and crinkled—they looked as if one hasty touch would turn them to dust—and the binding was concerning. I searched for a title, or some indication of what the book may be about, but came up empty.

Just read it. Rosalie thought angrily to me before strutting out of my room and shutting the door with a little more force than necessary.

I held the book uncertainly in my hands. Was this book ours? Most of our older books—mostly centuries old—had been laminated or stored away. But this book looked as if it had been read to death.

Before I could start reading the book, Esme's thoughts interrupted my own.Meet me in the kitchen, Edward. She thought. I wish to speak to you about something concerning Bella.

I ran down the stairs putting my abnormal vampire speed to use. I was sitting on a chair facing Esme in the kitchen in less than a second after she had beckoned me with her thoughts.

Thank you. She smiled warmly, gently brushing her caramel-colored hair away from her face. I nodded, urging her to continue. Edward, I wanted to let you know how excited I am about Bella becoming a member of this family. Truly, I am. But I did want to ask you…Esme's thoughts suddenly flickered to of happy couples looking down upon their newborn babies. Realizing I had seen these images, she looked down hesitantly, biting her lip. As you already know, vampires can't have children… and Bella may want to.

I couldn't stand it then—the look Esme was giving me. Her face was frozen with a mixture of sorrow and longing. I knew what she was thinking of—I did not have to read Esme's thoughts to know that she was remembering becoming pregnant and losing her baby in her human life.

And at that moment, I, too, was imagining having children. Standing next to Bella as we watched children playing in a lush, green backyard—our backyard? Flipping through baby books, trying to find the perfect name. Teaching a child—our child?—how to play the piano. I was suddenly soaring. Fantasies of Bella and I having a family together flitted through my mind. But just as quickly as I had thought of them, realization sunk in. None of this would be possible, because of Bella's choosing to remain with me. As much as I loved Bella, I could never be a father to her children. I would never teach my child to play the piano. I would never watch as Bella, in her hospital gown, cradle our newborn child in her arms for the very first time.

I watched, warily, as Esme slowly composed her expression and met my gaze again. I don't mean to pressure you, Edward. All I am asking you to do is think about it. Bella may want to have children. Every one of us—Jasper, Alice, Emmett, Rosalie, Carlisle, and I—would jump at the chance of having children. You and Bella are lucky enough to have a choice. Please… think about it.

I could feel the shock on my face as I absorbed what Esme was telling me. Of course I wanted children—and with Bella! I couldn't think of anything better.

"How would that be possible… for us?" I asked hesitantly. Esme's eyes suddenly became unsure. To be honest, I did not think that far ahead. She thought, laughing bleakly. I suppose that was wishful thinking on my part. She smiled wistfully. It would be nice though, wouldn't it? Having your own baby, after all these years, with Bella... Her thoughts trailed off.

I willingly tuned her out, suddenly furious. How much I was taking away from Bella! I seethed. Not only am I taking away her chance at a normal, happy, HUMAN life—but her chance at having a child as well!

Before I could do any damage to the surroundings, I reined in my anger. Although I knew Esme had seen the flicker of rage on my face, I quickly composed it to a hard mask, hopefully concealing all traces of emotion. "Thank you, Esme. Excuse me. I must go hunting." I muttered, hoping to come up with a convincing explanation for my actions later. As for the meantime, I had to leave. Get out. Go somewhere. Anywhere.

I rushed out of the house, slamming the door on my way out. I broke into a sprint the second I got out. Within seconds I was miles away from our home, feeling the air rush by me at terminal velocity. Perhaps this speed was alarmingly fast for humans—I chuckled when I remembered Bella's reaction to our first run together from the meadow—but for me, this speed was simply exhilarating.

I ran, fast and carelessly. I wouldn't—no, I forced myself not to think about anything. About the mournful look on Esme's face as she remembered losing her child. About Bella—sweet, innocent Bella—who I was inadvertently killing by making her a vampire. How I was taking away her only chance at having a baby.

No, I ran because I had to. I couldn't stop, because if I did, I would be forced to face a choice that would permanently alter my life. Would I change Bella? Am I really enough of a monster to take away her chance of having children? Of having a life, other than one filled with sleepless nights and relentless thirst?

Hey! Just wanted to remind you guys to PLEASE rate & review… since this is my first fanfic, I want to see how I'm doing! Tell me your favorite parts or whose point of view you would like to see and I'll do my best. I'm working on Chapter 3 now and it should be out pretty soon. Hope to hear from you!

- xxtwilight