Extreme Ghostbusters/Danny Phantom: She Who Never Stops
Part 2
Garrett and Roland were dumped on a cold metal floor. The vultures had absolutely insisted on carrying them, which made them both feel rather like children - but apparently there was a very real danger that the two humans might get lost in what the vultures termed the Ghost Zone if they tried to navigate it by themselves.
"Wait here, please," one of the vultures said, and all three of them disappeared through the ceiling.
"Was it smart of them to just leave us here like this?" asked Garrett. "One or two of them could have stayed to keep an eye on us, surely."
"Well," said Roland, "what can we do?"
"I don't know. I really feel like doing something just to show them."
"Well, let's just take a little look around." Roland, who had been crouching on the ground after being dumped, rose to his feet. "So this is Wisconsin, is it?"
"It's not the whole of Wisconsin, Ro."
"Yes, I know. There are no windows in here - I really feel like we're in a basement."
"Well," said Garrett, "I'm sure they have basements in Wisconsin."
Roland turned round, and caught sight of a large circular vortex. "Wow - that's bigger than the portal in our basement."
Garrett spun his chair around. "Yeah, I guess it is. Maybe the guy who lives here is trying to compensate for something."
He backed away from the portal, turned, and took a look at this surroundings. The room was filled with all kinds of bizarre equipment that Garrett couldn't even begin to recognise, and he was tempted to challenge Roland to tell him what some of it was. Then a silver laptop caught his eye, and he couldn't help noticing the screensaver.
"Look at this," said Garrett, rolling over to the laptop as image after image of the same curvaceous red-haired woman appeared on the screen. "I wonder who she is. She can't be an actress or a model or anything - she's too old and not pretty enough."
"Maybe she's his wife," said Roland.
"But whose wife? Who is this guy? And where the hell did he find a trio of ghost vultures to do his bidding?"
"In the Ghost Zone, gentlemen - I would have thought that was perfectly obvious," said a calm, genteel voice, and the two Ghostbusters looked up to see their host standing in the doorway. He looked to be in his late fifties, with neat grey hair and beard, and he wore a smart and expensive looking suit. "Welcome to my home. I trust you have been well treated. What are you doing?" His voice sharpened suddenly when he noticed how close they were to the laptop. "Stop looking at that - it's none of your business!"
"Sorry," said Roland. "We were only looking at the screensaver - of course we wouldn't dream of looking at your private files or anything."
"She's exquisite, isn't she?" said the man, his expression softening as he descended the stairs and approached them. "Well then - introductions. My name is Vlad Masters."
"I'm Roland Jackson," said Roland. "This is Garrett Miller."
"Indeed," said Vlad, shaking their hands in turn, and holding onto Garrett's for a moment longer than was necessary. "Forgive me, Mr. Miller, but don't you find that contraption somewhat inhibiting in your line of work?"
"No," Garrett said sharply.
"Garrett is extremely capable, Mr. Masters," added Roland.
Vlad smiled. "Indeed. I was to understand there were four of you. Did my servants not bring your two colleagues?"
"They weren't with us when your, um, vultures arrived," said Roland.
"Ah, I see. Do excuse me." Vlad turned round and stalked up the stairs, to stand once again in the doorway. Evidently one or more of his vultures were still outside, as he started saying, "I told you to bring me all four."
"We could only find those two," one of vultures' voices was just audible.
"How hard did you look?"
"Well… they were just by the Ghost Portal. We thought we'd better bring them straightaway."
"Fine," said Vlad. "They're here now, so go back into that portal and fetch me their two companions."
The three vultures flew down into the basement, towards the portal, as Vlad descended the stairs again at a more leisurely pace.
"May we enquire as to where your two colleagues are likely to be?" he asked.
"I think," Roland said carefully, "we would rather not tell you, until we know exactly what it is you want with us."
Vlad's eyes seemed to flicker slightly, but then he said in the same amiable tone of voice, "That is not an unreasonable request. I thought you and I could help each other. You see, we are in the same line of work. This equipment" - he gestured around him - "is all designed specifically for the hunting down and extinguishing of ghosts."
"It is?" Roland dropped his guard, and started to look a little excited. "Well, I'd be very interested to see it. But why leave Egon and Janine behind? Egon invented all of our equipment, or at least co-invented it - you'd be better off talking to him."
"Oh, come now, I am sure your mentor has taught you well," said Vlad. "Is there anything he can tell me that you can't?"
"Plenty," said Roland. "And he'll be interested in what you have to say as well."
"Y'know, Masters," said Garrett, "your three pet birds left Egon and Janine knocked out on our basement floor. They clearly did not want to bring them here, but you're making it sound like you're not bothered either way."
"Well," said Vlad, "I was planning a little excursion for us. And those two - "
"Are way younger and fitter than you, buddy."
"Younger, I daresay," said Vlad, "but fitter? Well… I may surprise you."
"What's the real reason you don't want them here?" asked Garrett.
"Oh, all right," said Vlad. "I see I must be completely honest with you. It occurs to me that I may learn more of your methods from you eager young things than from your boss. Rumour has it that he is reluctant to divulge Ghostbuster secrets to outsiders."
"I'm not telling you anything Egon wouldn't want me to," said Roland. "I hope you understand that, Mr. Masters."
"Just how do you know so much about us, anyway?" demanded Garrett.
"You are legendary in the Ghost Zone," said Vlad. "Most of them think you are a myth - at least, none of them has ever found you, much to their relief. Until today."
"Well I'm sorry," said Garrett, "but this whole thing seems very fishy to me. You open up a portal into a place you weren't even sure existed; you send some ghosts to come and fetch us here, apparently with permission to knock out our boss and our secretary in the process… just so you can talk shop to us?"
"Oh, my dear boy!" said Vlad, spreading his hands in a gesture of innocence. "You do not yet understand. Things have been so very difficult for me ever since that ghost boy from Amity Park started terrorising me, not to mention all the innocent people of that town, including two very good friends of mine from college. They are ghost hunters, like myself, and even they cannot defeat him! Ever since that boy materialised, my life has been an arduous quest to rid myself of him. I am growing quite desperate!"
"Which is where we come in," Roland deduced.
"Indeed. Amity Park is a fair distance from here, but I have the wretched boy coming out of his portal whenever he feels the desire to torture me."
"Can't you just close the portal?" asked Garrett. "I mean, you obviously know how to open and close these things."
"Oh, I couldn't do that," said Vlad. "What of my dear friends, Jack and Maddie? They have their own problems with the ghost child. It's a fair way to Amity Park, but here I have a direct link to their basement."
"Well then," said Roland, "maybe you could trap this ghost in the, um, Ghost Zone, and then close both of the - "
"No!" Vlad snapped irritably. Then, more calmly, "Well, it is an idea worth considering, but you will have to persuade dear whimsical Jack. He has devoted his entire life to the study of ghosts, and he started working on that portal twenty years ago in our college days. He will be most reluctant just to close it."
"Twenty years since college?" murmured Garrett, wondering whether Vlad had been a mature student. He could be in his forties, but he didn't exactly look good on it.
"Well I'm sorry if I'm speaking out of turn here, Mr. Masters, but this Jack sounds like a very rash and foolish man," said Roland. "Having a Ghost Portal wide open like that is just like if we created a door in and out of the containment unit."
"Ah, yes, your containment unit." Vlad suddenly seemed to perk up. "I have heard rumours of this containment unit. Do please explain it to me."
"Well…" said Roland, looking helplessly at Garrett and wishing he hadn't mentioned it.
"Oh, come now, Mr. Jackson - a device such as that would be most useful to me."
"Look, Mr. Masters, I really think you'd do better to talk to - "
The return of the three vultures interrupted the conversation, for which Roland was very grateful.
"Where are they?" demanded Vlad, his left eye twitching with impatience.
"We couldn't find them," said one of vultures.
"WHAT? How hard did you look for them?"
"Roland!" hissed Garrett, grabbing Roland's sleeve and pulling him down to his level. "I do not trust this guy. I mean, come on! He's been opening up dangerous portals; he's asking questions about the containment unit, which is never a good sign; he has minions who kidnap people for him, and he yells at them when they don't quite manage it - and the guy's name is Vlad, for crying out loud!"
"He can't help the name he was given," said Roland.
"No, he can't - but all the other stuff I just said?"
Roland sighed. "I know. You're right. But what do we do now? He clearly doesn't have Eduardo and Kylie, which is what we came for."
"Problem?" Vlad's voice intruded on their whispered conversation.
"Um, no," said Roland. "No problem. Mr. Masters… perhaps you would tell us more about this excursion you have planned."
"Oh, all right," said Vlad. "I intend to take you to Amity Park. We don't have to use my Ghost Portal, if you would rather not - it'll only take a couple of hours by private jet."
"There's a Ghost Portal in Amity Park as well, you say?" asked Garrett.
"There is indeed."
"Right." Garrett cut a glance at Roland. "Take us there."
"Why so eager?" asked Vlad.
"I'm intrigued about this ghost boy."
"Are you really?"
"Absolutely. We've dealt with some tough cookies in our time, Mr. Masters, but the Ghostbusters always win through in the end. Roland and I are most anxious to meet the ghost who can shake off all of your arsenal," and he spread his arms in a gesture encompassing the entire room.
"Well," said Vlad, "you will of course have your attempt at defeating Danny Phantom in good time. But first there is somebody I would like you to meet."
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
"I shove my thermos in here, if you'll pardon the expression," said Danny, causing Tucker to giggle childishly; "push this little button, a-and…" - a few lights flashed, just to let them know something was happening, and then Danny pulled his thermos out of the slot by the Ghost Portal - "they're in the Ghost Zone."
"That's not dissimilar to what we do," said Kylie. She had been only too happy to follow Danny back to the Ghost Portal, considering her original intention of studying it, and Tucker and Sam had insisted on going with them. "Now, about closing our portal. Would your dad know how?"
"Oof." Danny looked dubious. "Maybe, maybe not. But to be honest with you, Kylie, it's not generally a good idea to tell my dad about stuff like this - he always gets the wrong end of the stick and ends up making things worse."
"You shouldn't talk about your dad like that," said Eduardo.
Danny scowled. "I'm only telling you how it is. I mean, come on - you saw him getting the wrong end of the stick when you two first arrived here."
"I take your point entirely, Danny," said Kylie, cutting a glance at Eduardo, and finding herself unable to read his expression. "You said there were two people who had created portals before, didn't you?"
"That sounds like something I might have said," said Danny.
"Well, if your dad's one of them, who's the other?"
"Vlad Masters," said Danny. "And if he opened a portal to your world, you can bet you're in for some kind of - "
He was cut off as, once again, his breath turned blue, and then the large metal gateway to the Ghost Zone suddenly slid open. Tucker and Sam both ducked behind the nearest chair as the two green-skinned ghosts from the Nasty Burger, and earlier the Ghostbusters' basement, flew out of the green vortex.
"I'm going ghost!" announced Danny, and this time Kylie and Eduardo were able to watch the transformation. A white halo of light formed around Danny's middle and then split in two, one ring travelling up towards his head and the other down towards his feet. As the light moved over his body, Danny's jeans and t-shirt transformed into the black-and-white jumpsuit; his eyes went from blue to green, and his hair from black to white.
"What's the point of that?" demanded Kylie, backing away as one of the ghosts started heading towards her. "They just flew straight out again! Does that happen often?"
"Oh, sometimes!" Danny called over the noise of the green energy he was hurling at the ghost that wasn't advancing on Kylie. "They usually stay for longer than that, though!"
"That's completely pointless!" said Kylie, beginning to panic now that the ghost had her cornered. "Danny, would you be able to shoot up to your room and fetch our proton guns, please?"
"No need, I can handle it," said Danny.
"WHERE IS SHE?" roared the ghost who was looming over Kylie. "Your friends did something to her, didn't they!"
"Um… probably," said Kylie. "Danny, please, I don't like relying on somebody else to rescue me."
This time, however, she had to put up with being rescued. The ghost suddenly screamed, and disappeared once again inside Danny's Fenton Thermos.
"Danny-y-y!" Sam wailed helplessly. "She's trying to steal my contacts!"
Danny turned, and saw that the remaining ghost was apparently trying to claw out Sam's eyes, while Sam just about managed to keep her at bay by holding onto her wrists.
"Do you really want Sam's contacts?" asked Danny, clearly puzzled.
"Yes!" exclaimed the ghost. "They are so cool! And when I've got them, I think I'll have your nifty thermos."
"DANNY!" shrieked Sam.
Danny balled a fist and started to brew up a ball of green energy, but apparently didn't notice the ghost throwing her own purple stream of power at him. Danny was thrown against the wall, and held there as the purple energy moulded itself into a net.
"Oh, for…" Sam let go of the ghost's wrists, ducked out of its reach and picked up the nearest gun. When she fired it at the ghost, the gun vomited out a glowing green net not unlike the one holding Danny, and pinned the ghost to the floor.
Danny, meanwhile, had managed to blast his way out of his own bonds. He approached the trapped ghost, and sucked her into the thermos before she could follow his example.
"I think I'll say it again," said Kylie: "it is just dumb to put the ghosts straight back where they came from."
"Yeah, well, it's the only system we have," Danny said irritably.
"Please," said Kylie, "I would like my proton gun. May I go and fetch it?"
"No, wait there, I'll get it," said Danny, and disappeared through the ceiling.
"He'd better hope his parents don't see him," said Sam, as she dusted herself down.
Kylie looked at her thoughtfully. "Are you ok, Sam?"
"Oh, yeah, I'm fine," said Sam.
"You didn't need Danny after all, really, did you?"
She blushed furiously. "Well… no, as it turns out."
"Oh," said Tucker, "Sam likes it when Danny rescues her, don't you, Sam?"
"Don't be ridiculous," said Sam. "I'm a modern woman - I can take care of myself."
"Oh, look, it's ok," Kylie found herself saying. "I'll bet you've rescued him back a few times, haven't you?"
At this point Danny materialised through the ceiling, carrying Eduardo's proton pack and Kylie's gun, both of them glowing the same watery blue as he was.
"Y'know, Kylie," said Danny, handing Kylie her gun once it had returned to its normal solid form, "this is actually pretty sexist, you having a silly little gun like this. I'm sure Sam doesn't approve."
"Perhaps," said Sam, "feeling the need to have a big gun is something akin to when guys feel the need to have a big car."
"Oh, hey, look, we just use what we're given," Eduardo said hastily.
"Danny," said Kylie. "You can carry solid objects through walls and ceilings."
"Yeah, I know," said Danny.
"Well… ghosts can't do that where we come from."
"Oh, can't they?" said Danny. "We all can around here. And I can make things invisible just by touching them too."
"That includes people," added Sam. "Why don't you show them, Danny?" and she held out her hand invitingly.
Danny looked at her blankly, and shrugged. "Ok."
He took Sam's hand, and a moment later they both disappeared. Eduardo, Kylie and Tucker waited for a few seconds in expectant silence, and then Danny flew in through the wall carrying an intangible and slightly flustered looking Sam in his arms.
"There," he said, "easy," and dumped Sam heavily in a chair next to a desk, which happened to hold a computer on it.
Kylie shot Sam a sympathetic look, noticing the sour expression on her face. She tried giving her an encouraging smile, but Sam didn't seem to notice.
"Anyway," said Danny, whipping out the Fenton Thermos again, "what are we gonna do with these guys? It seems pretty pointless just dumping them back in the Ghost Zone if they can just fly straight out again."
"When we're having a problem trapping ghosts," said Kylie, "we always do a little research into their history and such. Well, I like to do that whether they're a big problem or not - but my point is, maybe there's some other way to defeat them."
"Cool!" said Tucker, shooing Sam out of the chair at the computer desk. "Now it's Tucker's time to shine!"
Kylie cocked an eyebrow. "You're going to use that thing?"
"Of course," said Tucker, as the computer started to boot up. "How else are you supposed to find out anything?"
"Well," said Kylie, "with books, maybe?"
"Books?" Tucker started to laugh. "What century are you living in?"
"The twentieth," said Danny. "Didn't I tell you they're from nineteen ninety-seven?"
"No." Tucker looked from Kylie to Eduardo and back again. "I know the internet was around in nineteen ninety-seven - I was there."
"Were you really?" asked Kylie, who had been quietly wondering just how far in the future she was. "How old were you?"
"Seven, going on eight."
"And did you use the internet often?"
"Of course. All the time."
"Well," said Kylie, "we all grew up without it, and haven't become accustomed to it - we tend to use it very sparingly."
Tucker shook his head sadly. "Thank Bill Gates the nineties are but a distant memory."
"Y'know, Tucker," said Sam, "anyone can put any old crap on the internet - books are more reliable." She then turned to Kylie and said, "I can take you to the occult bookstore if you like - that's always my first port of call when there's research needs doing."
"That sounds great, Sam," said Kylie, and meant it. Amity Park was a pretty bizarre place - it would be nice to find something safe and familiar like books in it. "Eduardo, are you coming with us?"
"Actually," said Eduardo, "I was just thinking about checking back with HQ. They don't actually know where we are, Kylie."
"You can jump in the Spectre Speeder with me, then," said Danny, suddenly adopting a look of determination that came as a surprise to his two guests - they hadn't seen any such fortitude in his character before. "I'm going to take a little trip to Wisconsin to ask a certain person if he's been opening up any portals to the past."
"Danny, no!" exclaimed Sam, lunging towards him and grabbing both of his elbows. "You can't go to Vlad - I don't want you getting hurt."
"Sam, chillax, I'll be fine," Danny said breezily, shaking her hands off him.
"But you always get hurt when meet Vlad. And I mean seriously hurt. Screaming in agony hurt. Weak to the point of being unable to transform hurt!"
"That actually doesn't sound like a good idea, Danny," Kylie had to agree.
Danny sighed heavily. "Look," he said, "I've dealt with Vlad plenty of times in the past. I'll be fine, Sam - don't be such a wet blanket."
"Wet blanket?" Sam's eyebrows shot upwards, and then moments later fell into a frown. "I'm just worried about you, Danny!"
"Well don't!" he cried, exasperated.
"Fine." Sam turned on her heel and stalked towards the exit. "Go get yourself tortured half to death - see if I care. Kylie, are you coming or not?"
Kylie and Eduardo exchanged a look of bewilderment, and then Kylie hastily followed Sam out of the basement. That girl was clearly in no mood to be argued with.
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
"All right, so how do you wanna play this?" asked Danny, as he drove himself and Eduardo through the Ghost Zone. "Shall I drop you off and then go and confront Vlad and then pick you up again? Or would you rather just stay home once you're there?"
Tempting as it was to say yes, Eduardo said instead, "I don't wanna leave Kylie."
"Oh yes?" Danny cut him a knowing look. "So is there really nothing sexier than a Goth girl in New York?"
"Not as a general rule."
"She is pretty cute."
"I hadn't noticed."
"No?" said Danny. "Well, I'd take another look if I were you."
Eduardo, deciding to kill that particular conversation, asked, "So who's Vlad?"
"Vlad," said Danny, "is my arch-nemesis. Do you guys have an arch-nemesis?"
"No."
"Well I do, and Vlad's it."
"Look, Danny," said Eduardo, who seemed to be receiving an unexpected visit from his conscience. He didn't like the thought of facing Danny's arch-nemesis, but even so, the kid was only fourteen. "I don't think I should let you go to this Vlad all by yourself."
"Dude," said Danny, "I can handle Vlad. We've faced each other a ton of times."
"But Sam said he - "
"Sam thinks she knows a hell of a lot more than she does, when actually she's hardly ever even there when I have to fight Vlad. I know how to handle him."
"She said something about screaming in agony and not being able to transform."
"I can handle Vlad, all right? How many more times? Look, he's just… he's just an old friend of Mom and Dad's from college."
Eduardo blinked. "Is that all?"
Danny's entire body seemed to stiffen. "Yes."
"What's his beef with you?"
"Well, just… he's got this huge grudge against Dad because he… well, he married my mom, and Vlad's kind of in love with her, which is totally gross, but there it is."
"How is that your fault?" asked Eduardo.
"It's not."
"Then why -?"
"Dude, jeez, can't you just let it die?" Danny said shrilly. "He knows about my ghost powers, all right? He's old and bitter and he's made a few evil plans in the past that I've been able to thwart using my ghost powers, and now he hates me. Right, here we are, your door. I think." He brought the Spectre Speeder to an abrupt halt in front of one of the numerous purple doors adorning the Ghost Zone. "You go in there and let whoever the hell it is know what's been going on, and I'll go and confront Vlad, and then I'll come back and pick you up as soon as I can. Ok?"
"But Danny," said Eduardo, "I don't you like you - "
"You can't stop me."
He looked at Danny, and saw a face that broached no argument - and suddenly Eduardo remembered being babied when he was fourteen. He remembered how much he had hated it - he'd never liked being told what to do. So what should he say to Danny now? Be careful? No, better not.
"Good luck."
Danny smiled slightly. "Thanks."
Eduardo climbed out of the Spectre Speeder and reached for the purple door. In the instant before he pulled it open, a horrible thought flashed through his mind. What if Danny's altercation with Vlad, for whatever reason, led to the portal being closed? Kylie might - no - would be stuck in twenty-first century Amity Park forever.
Instinctively Eduardo turned round, and could no longer see the Spectre Speeder. He couldn't call Danny back, so clearly he was just going to have to hope for the best. There was nothing for it now but to pull open the door and head back into the firehouse basement. If it was there. He'd hardly heard them before, but now Danny's words suddenly rang in Eduardo's head: "Right, here we are, your door. I think." Oh God. Bracing himself for the worst, Eduardo pulled open the purple door.
He was momentarily relieved when he found the familiar basement on the other side, but began to panic a moment later when he saw Egon and Janine both slumped on the floor. He went over to Janine, who happened to be slightly nearer, shook her, and then took the glove from his right hand and placed his palm in front of her mouth. He exhaled heavily when he felt that she was still breathing. Then he happened to look up and noticed, for the first time, Slimer, who was hovering around and looking faintly concerned.
"Slimer, what the hell happened?" said Eduardo. "Can't you do something about this?"
Slimer looked indignant, babbled for a few seconds, and then picked up the Post-it next to Egon's head. He handed it to Eduardo, who recognised Roland's handwriting at once, and began to read what he had to say:
Have gone into portal with three ghost vultures. Seem friendly enough. Want to take us to Wisconsin(??). Will return ASAP with K + E. Best if you don't follow. (Vultures knocked you out and insist you'll be ok - sorry about that.)
Eduardo blinked at the note, and then looked back up at Slimer. "Ghost vultures? Wisconsin? What the hell…?"
At that moment Janine started to come round, quickly copied by Egon. They both sat up and blinked a few times, with Eduardo staring at them expectantly. It seemed a while before either of them said anything. Then finally, Janine spoke.
"Eduardo! You're ok! What happened? Where's Kylie? What happened to Roland and Garrett?"
"Not forgetting the vulture ghosts," added Egon.
Eduardo handed Janine the Post-it. She read it quickly, shook her head in bewilderment and then handed it to Egon. His immediate response was, "Wisconsin?"
"Don't ask me," said Eduardo. "I haven't seen them since this morning."
"Well," said Egon, "you're here, so let's deal with that first and foremost. Do you know where Kylie is?"
"Yes," said Eduardo. "She's safe. For now, at least."
"Perhaps," said Egon, "you had better tell us what's been going on."
Eduardo began his story with the disappearance of the Jessica Rabbit-esque woman into the portal, and the emergence of Danny Phantom moments later. Egon became slightly angry when he learned of the decision to follow Danny to Amity Park, but Janine leapt to Eduardo's defence by pointing out how rash Kylie could be when she wanted to, and adding, "You were right to follow her."
Eduardo was then treated to a diverse medley of facial expressions as he continued his story. When he explained as best he could about Danny being half ghost, Egon looked rather as though he wanted to believe it, but was reluctant to do so. Eduardo began to sound slightly dubious himself when he came to tell them about Danny's encounters in the Nasty Burger, but Egon began to perk up when the story moved back to the basement and all of Danny's parents' ghost hunting equipment.
"I should be most interested to meet this Mr. and Mrs. Fenton," he said.
"That's nice, Egon, isn't it?" remarked Janine. "A happily married couple fighting ghosts together."
"Must be tough on Danny," said Eduardo, "being half ghost, and his parents hating ghosts so much."
"Don't they know?" asked Janine.
Eduardo thought for a moment. He hadn't been told directly whether Jack and Maddie knew their son's secret; but then he remembered their cover story, and the apparent need for discretion until they were alone with Jazz, and said, "No."
"AAAHH!" Slimer suddenly screamed, and ducked behind Egon and Janine, both of whom were staring past Eduardo in astonishment.
Eduardo turned and saw Danny, in his human form, sauntering out of the portal. His arms were folded across his chest, clutching some kind of antiquated looking book.
"That was fast," said Eduardo.
"He wasn't there," said Danny.
"Oh, well… this is Egon and Janine," said Eduardo. "Guys, this is Danny."
"The half ghost?" Egon raised his eyebrows. "Are you really half ghost, Danny?"
Danny blinked. "Yes."
"I wonder, may I have a demonstra- "
"Egon," said Janine, "there are more important things. Danny, does this mean anything to you?" and she handed Roland's Post-it to Danny.
"No," said Danny. "This handwriting's terrible."
"It says," Egon said patiently, "that three ghost vultures came out of that portal and took two members of my team to Wisconsin."
"Oh," said Danny. "Well, that's easy. Vlad lives in Wisconsin and those three vultures are his minions. I met them in his mansion, and they wanted to destroy me and stuff, but a few ecto-grenades soon sent them packing."
"So you're telling us that Roland and Garrett are with your arch-nemesis?" Eduardo asked anxiously. "The one that Sam insists is so dangerous?"
"Yes," said Danny, "they are, definitely, but there's no need to panic just yet - I think they're safe for now. I think you guys should take a look at this," and he held the book he'd been carrying out to Eduardo. "I found it lying around in Vlad's mansion."
"How come it's glowing?" asked Eduardo.
"It's a ghost book."
"A ghost book?" Egon snatched the book from Eduardo's hands and put his PKE meter to it. "Hmm… you're right. How can we be touching it?"
"Humans can touch most ghost stuff," said Danny. "At least where I come from."
Egon looked at the cover of the book, and then at the teenage boy standing in front of him. Unable to resist any longer, he took a quick PKE reading of Danny.
"Dude." Danny took a step back. "This is exactly why I don't tell my parents my secret. I don't want to be treated as different just because I'm half ghost."
"But you are different," said Egon. "How did it happen? Eduardo explained a little, but I fail to see how - "
"Pease don't," said Danny. Then he looked at Janine and said, "Can't you persuade this guy that I'm not some kind of lab rat? You two are hot for each other, aren't you?"
Janine started. "What makes you say that?"
"Maybe you should just take a little look in that book."
The book changed hands again as Janine snatched it from Egon, and opened it at a random page. She flicked through it a little further, and then her eyes widened as she saw a woman strongly resembling herself, elaborately illustrated with fiery hair and ripped garments, falling at the feet of an equally flamboyant misrepresentation of Egon.
"Oh, come on," she said. "Nobody that skinny has boobs that big. Well… apart from those ghosts this morning."
"Yeah, ghosts sometimes do," said Danny. "They can be pretty cartoony, really."
" 'The fiery redhead who suffered under the burden of her unrequited love for Spengler the Great'," she read. "It makes me sound like such a stereotype! 'Here depicted falling at Spengler's feet after the murder of Mary Susannah, whose affection for Spengler drove the clinging and obsessive Janine into a jealous rage.' Well that never happened."
"No," said Egon, "it didn't."
"Well I've only had a flick through," said Danny, "but there's a lot of stuff in there that sounds like a load of baloney. I doubt if Vlad believes all that - he's pretty smart, really - but there is something on the first page about how it's myth but some of it just might possibly be based in truth. You know, like when you read a comic book based on Arthurian legend or something? So obviously Vlad decided to go looking for you guys."
"Why?" asked Eduardo, taking the book.
"Well, that's pretty obvious. So you can lock me up in your ghost prison for all eternity."
"Ghost prison?" Eduardo found several references to this phrase on the index page, and turned to the first one. " 'In this dreadful device the Ghostbusters locked away the spirits and phantoms they captured, there to be tortured for all eternity.' What? No one gets tortured in there. Am I in this thing?" and he started flicking through the pages.
"Yeah, you're in it," said Danny. "And Kylie, looking pretty hot."
"Oh, yeah," Eduardo agreed. "You'd never catch her wearing something quite that skimpy."
"Shame, huh?" Danny smiled crookedly.
"Danny," said Eduardo, not looking up from the book, "you have what my sister-in-law would call a roving eye, don't you?"
"What makes you say that?" Danny said defensively.
"Well - Kylie, Paulina, Sam…"
"Sam? Dude, you're way off - me and Sam are just friends."
"Oh, ok," Eduardo said dismissively. "This is a load of bullshit, man. I'm not Spanish, I'm second generation Mexican. And what's Garrett doing walking around like that?"
"Why shouldn't he?" asked Danny.
"He's disabled."
"Is he?"
"Yes."
"Doesn't that make it a bit hard for him?"
"Don't say anything like that when you meet him," said Eduardo. "There's not much of Roland in here."
"Oh, I wonder why not," said Janine, peering over Eduardo's shoulder at the book.
"Well," said Eduardo, "he is kind of boring."
"It says something about this Roland person being the brains of the operation, next to Spengler the Great," said Danny, "so Vlad'll probably be interested in him."
"Who is this Vlad?" asked Egon.
"My arch-nemesis," said Danny. "And if he thinks they can help him defeat me, your friends are safe for now. He'll probably give them some sob story about how I've kept him from the love of his life… How gullible are they?"
"Not," said Janine. "Well, I don't think so - but it depends how convincing your Vlad is."
Danny shook his head. "I just don't know, but we're not gonna find out anything by standing around here. Shall we head back to Amity Park, Eduardo?"
"Maybe we should go with you," said Egon.
Danny looked at him sharply. "Why? So you can steal ideas about ghost catching from my mom and dad and study me like some kind of animal?"
"I don't need to steal anybody's ideas," bristled Egon.
"Egon," Janine said gently, and put a hand on his arm. "It sounds to me like you're not needed. This is Danny's territory."
"Thanks," said Danny, sounding touched. "This is my arch-nemesis - I can handle him."
"All right," Egon relented. "So what will you do? Ideally you'll end up by bringing all four of them back and then somehow closing that portal."
"Fine, I will," said Danny. "Come on, Eduardo - let's get back. Y'know," he added, "Eduardo's kinda long - do you prefer something shorter?"
"Not really," said Eduardo, "but you can call me Eddie if you like."
"Oh, ok," said Danny, leading the way back through the portal to the Ghost Zone. "Bye, Egon and Janine - hopefully forever. Egon's a weird name, isn't it?" as he climbed into the Spectre Speeder. "Still, he's a pretty weird guy, if you don't mind my saying so."
"No," said Eduardo, "I don't mind. Garrett wouldn't mind either, but don't say anything like that to Roland when you meet him, and definitely not to Kylie. She's got a thing about old guys with letters after their name."
"Do I detect a note of bitterness there, Eddie?" asked Danny, as he started up the engines on the Spectre Speeder.
"Danny," said Eduardo. "What was with that chick who was attacking you at the burger joint? Ky asked Sam about her, but she didn't really explain very much."
"Oh." Danny suddenly took on a look of deep melancholy, and let out a long sigh. "She's just… a girl."
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
Vlad's private jet landed soon after the "couple of hours" he had promised. By this time Eduardo was back in Danny's basement listening with half an ear to what Tucker had been able to find out on the internet, but Roland and Garrett couldn't know this. They had no way even of knowing whether Kylie and Eduardo were out of harm's way, and so were anxious to start looking for them.
"Sorry about that," said Vlad, waiting on the ground and not sounding a bit sorry, as Roland struggled to help Garrett out of the plane. "It never really occurred to me that I'd be giving a disabled person a lift in my private jet."
"Yeah, well, maybe that's an issue that needs addressing," said Garrett. Then he said more quietly to Roland, "Maybe we should make a break for it."
"How would that work?" said Roland. "The guy has a jet. And besides, we have no idea where we are, and we don't know where this Ghost Portal is. Vlad must know his way around - I really think we should - "
"Everything all right?" asked Vlad. "You two seem to have a lot of furtive conversations when you think I'm not looking. Don't you trust me?"
"Well," said Garrett, "I don't see why we should."
"That's a fair point," said Vlad. "Let me take you to meet my young friend - I think you'll find that you and she have a lot in common," and he led them over to a parked limousine that neither Roland nor Garrett had taken much notice of upon landing.
"Who is she?" asked Roland, waiting for Garrett to heave himself onto the backseat.
"A ghost hunter," said Vlad, "like yourselves. She is, however, a little less adept at the art of ghost catching than I understand you to be. I am most anxious for you to exchange notes with her."
"Well," said Roland, climbing into the limo after Vlad, "don't you want all four of us to meet her? Maybe we should go to this Ghost Portal you said is around her somewhere and try looking for our colleagues."
"As to that," said Vlad, "it may be better if I go there alone. Jack Fenton is a friend of mine, but I don't want to have to explain you two to him."
The limo had started moving now. Garrett and Roland could only assume that the chauffeur had been given prior instructions.
"How will you explain coming out of his portal with two Ghostbusters?" asked Garrett.
"Oh, I'm sure I'll think of something," Vlad said dismissively. "Are you sure you don't know where they might be?" He had already interrogated his two guests quite severely during the flight.
"No idea," said Garrett. "Like I said, we can only assume they took an early lunch."
"Hmm." Vlad's eyes narrowed suspiciously. "That wouldn't be a coy euphemism, would it? I have read that those two are lovers."
Garrett wrinkled his nose. "Eww."
"Have you?" Roland asked calmly.
"Yes, but then again, your story is quite embellished in the Ghost Zone. I doubt that your Janine really can shoot fire from her eyes."
"Well," said Roland, "metaphorically speaking, perhaps."
"Ah, here we are," Vlad said, minutes later, as the limo drew to a halt in front of a rundown apartment block. Vlad climbed out of the car, waited for his two companions and then entered the apartment block. "I've never visited her at home before - I wonder what I'll say if her father answers the door."
Much like the outside of the building, all the doors lining the graffitied walls looked as though they had seen better days. Vlad eventually stopped at one of these doors, knocked sharply on it and then waited for a few seconds, after which his summons was answered by a very large black man.
"Good afternoon, Mr. Gray," Vlad said pleasantly. "Is your daughter at home?"
"Who's asking?" Mr. Gray demanded sharply.
"I'm a visiting teacher at Casper High - didn't Valerie tell you about me? I've brought these two college students to talk to her about signing up for my business classes over the coming summer. She has a good head for business, I have found."
"Really?" Mr. Gray seemed to brighten. "Well, come in and I'll fetch her, Mr…?"
"Masters."
"How gullible is he?" said Garrett, as Mr. Gray disappeared into one of the rooms of his apartment.
"Well," said Vlad, "you know what parents are like - I imagined he'd like to hear that his daughter is willing to listen to advice about following in his footsteps. They have a very close relationship, you know," he added, somewhat scathingly. "You know the kind of thing: only child, single parent…"
"What happened to her mom?" Roland asked anxiously.
"Hmm… I never thought to ask. Ah, Valerie!" Vlad switched on a smile as Mr. Gray reappeared with his daughter: a tall, curvaceous and very beautiful black girl dressed in tight-fitting lycra sportswear.
"Mr. Masters, hi," said the girl, sounding quite out of breath.
"Sweetie," said her father, "what were you doing in there?"
"Oh, just… you know… working out, trying to burn a few calories."
"You weren't training yourself up for any more ghost hunting, were you?"
"Of course not, Daddy," Valerie smiled innocently, and Mr. Gray seemed satisfied. "I'll take these guys to my room, all right?"
Garrett couldn't help thinking that sounded faintly suspicious, but Mr. Gray agreed, and they all trailed into Valerie's bedroom.
"So who are these guys?" asked Valerie, dropping her innocent girly tone of voice.
It looked like the private quarters of a character from a very intense detective drama. As well as the bare essentials of a bed, desk and wardrobe, Valerie had adorned her room with a lot of rigorous exercise equipment. Perhaps more striking even than that, not an inch of wall was visible behind the newspaper cuttings she had plastered all over them. Most of the cuttings contained a picture of the same teenage boy in a jumpsuit, doing one thing or another: flying, materialising through a solid wall, shooting balls of energy from his hands… The headlines, too, adhered to a common theme: "Ghost Boy Strikes Again!" "Amity Park in Turmoil as Danny Phantom Terrorises Citizens!" "Casper High Ravens Distraught: Football Field Destroyed by Inviso-Bill."
"These are the, um, 'Extreme' Ghostbusters," said Vlad, apparently not keen on the phrase. "Well… two of them, anyway. Mr. Miller and Mr. Jackson. I thought you might be able to help each other."
"Ghostbusters?" Valerie positioned herself in front of a large metal frame, jumped up and grabbed the horizontal bar above her head. She started pulling herself up, straining only slightly as her arms supported her impressive weight. "I don't need any help, Vlad."
"Don't you?" asked Vlad. "Then why is the Ghost Boy still at large?"
"He's a ghost," said Valerie. "I can't destroy him - I can only see him off when he starts causing trouble."
"You really should talk to these men about some of their methods, Valerie."
"Oh yeah?" Valerie jumped down, and shot Garrett and Roland a challenging look. "Your methods are better than mine, are they?"
"Mr. Masters," said Roland, "I don't think our boss would like…"
"I don't need them," said Valerie, as she balled her fists and began a heated assault on a punch bag. "I can handle that Ghost Boy just fine."
"Valerie," said Vlad. "A little bird told me that he got away from you again this morning. Outside the Nasty Burger, wasn't it?"
"Well don't blame me, Vlad - this is your equipment," said Valerie. She stopped punching, the sweat running down her arms and forehead, and picked up a nasty looking gun she had lying around. "I sent him away squealing like a piglet with this - I did all I could, but I can't kill him. He's already dead."
Garrett and Roland exchanged a glance. They wanted to trust this girl - she seemed genuinely concerned about the fate of her town, if a little obsessive. She seemed a very strange ally for Vlad to have, but then again, they may have misjudged him. If his story was to be believed, he only wanted to rid himself of a troublesome ghost.
"Listen, Valerie," said Garrett. "We don't wanna step on any toes here, but Vlad could be right - maybe we can help each other."
"We do have a method for containing ghosts on a permanent basis," said Roland. "But I'm still not sure my boss - "
"Maybe your boss would like to meet us too," said Valerie, seeming to drop her guard. "I don't appreciate the insinuation that I'm not up the job, but I guess you can never have too many ghost hunters in Amity Park. That Ghost Boy" - her eyes narrowed, and her grip tightened on her gun - "is going down. Whoa!" as she accidentally brought down some of the plaster from the ceiling with a loud crimson laser.
"Valerie!" her father's voice called from somewhere else in the apartment. "Was that the ecto-gun?"
"No, Daddy!" Valerie trilled innocently.
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
"Sam," said Kylie, thumbing through a book about the history of zombies. "I like your bookstore. There are quite a few Goths in Amity Park, aren't there?" she added, as another Goth teenager wandered in through the door, bringing the total number of clientele up to about a dozen.
"Well," said Sam, "they seem to wander in from somewhere. It's weird - I never see them around school. So anyway, how's it going?"
"Hmm…?" said Kylie, stopping at a particularly interesting passage in the book.
"Anything about the three ghosts we had this morning?"
"Oh." She had almost forgotten about that. "No, nothing. They were wearing togas - did you notice?"
Sam shrugged. "Now that you mention it."
"Maybe they're Roman or Greek or something."
"Well," said Sam, noticing the cover of the book Kylie was reading, "they're not zombies."
"Yeah, well." Reluctantly, Kylie put the book down, just as Danny Phantom glided into her line of vision. "Oh, Danny, hi."
"Hey," said Danny. "Find anything?"
"Well," said Kylie, "no, not yet."
Danny laughed slightly, and said, "Tucker was right - computers are way faster than books, and much more interesting."
Kylie scowled. "And much less reliable. Any old whack job can just put stuff on the internet, you know."
"Well, how does this sound?" asked Danny. "The Furies. They have a Greek name too, but I'll never remember it in a million years."
"The Erinyes," Kylie provided. "Yes - that sounds right. Hold on." She moved over towards a bookshelf, picked up something that had Greek Mythology in the title and began to thumb through it. "Yes, here we go - the Erinyes. 'Said to have sprouted from the blood of Uranus - "
Danny scoffed.
" - when it landed on Gaia, the earth goddess, after he was castrated by his son Cronos.'"
Sam's eyes widened. "Oh, cool!"
"They're supposed to be ugly," said Kylie, "and carry burning brands and whips and have snakes for hair."
"But they don't," said Danny. "They're hot."
Sam scowled.
"Well, never mind," Kylie murmured distractedly. " 'Being born out of the blood of a violent act of betrayal, the Erinyes made it their business to go around wreaking revenge.' There were three, as I recall… yes, here we are: Tisiphone, 'she who wreaks murder' - let's hope she's the one Garrett and Roland presumably trapped; Megeara, 'the envious one' - that would explain why she's after everybody's shoes and stuff; and Alecto…"
" 'She who never stops,'" Danny provided. "See, there's nothing in that book that Tucker didn't find out much faster on the net. Except for the snakes for hair thing. Wasn't that supposed to be that chick… oh, you know, the one who turned everybody to stone?"
"Medusa," said Kylie. "She had snake-hair as well. It's what ugly people had in mythological Greece, apparently."
"Yeah, well - anything in there about how to stop it?" asked Danny.
Kylie smiled slightly. "Garrett says stuff like that when I'm doing research at home. Right, let's see here…"
She was distracted, however, as the door to the shop was suddenly kicked violently open, and once again Kylie found herself looking at the weapon-strewn woman in body armour from the Nasty Burger.
"All right, Ghost Boy, this is it!" the woman declared, and from somewhere behind her back she produced a contraption that made Kylie's eyes widen in disbelief. "You are goin' down! And this time, it's for good!"
"Ah man," muttered Danny, and flew into the air, but the ghost hunter had her flying board on her feet and was hot on his tail.
Kylie, thinking only of the device in the woman's hands, ran out of the bookstore and looked frantically around her. There, as she had half-expected, were Garrett and Roland… with an elderly looking man she had never seen before in her life.
"Kylie Griffin?" The stranger cocked an eyebrow as she approached. "Why, what a pleasant surprise. How on earth did you find your way here?"
Kylie ignored him completely, saying frantically to Garrett and Roland, "What did you give her that for?"
"I didn't give it to her," Roland said irritably. "She just sort of… flew off with it."
"She's a wilful young woman," said the man. "My name is Vlad Masters, by the way."
"I daresay," Kylie said curtly, watching anxiously as Danny flew out through the roof of the bookstore and the hunter, clutching one of the Ghostbusters' traps, came hurtling out of the door. They were followed closely by a breathless and anxious looking Sam.
"Vlad!" exclaimed Danny, hovering over the small company for a few seconds before he had to shoot off again, trying to duck a few more of those circular saws.
"Guys, that's Danny's arch-nemesis," said Kylie.
"Yeah," said Garrett, "we know."
"But Danny's - "
"Been telling her some very strange stories, I'm sure," Vlad cut in. "You shouldn't believe everything you're told, young lady. Oh, what's taking that girl so long?"
"She probably hasn't figured out how to open the trap," said Garrett. "We could show her, if she'd just sit still for a minute."
"Kylie," said Roland. "I wish to state now, for the record, that I don't like showing these people anything."
"We need that trap for the Furies," muttered Kylie.
By this time a small crowd had assembled. Several cameras were clicking around them - evidently Valerie would soon have a new cut-out for her collection. Looking around her, Kylie noticed a few faces she thought looked vaguely familiar from the Nasty Burger - and then Paulina pushed herself forward.
"KILL HER, GHOST BOY!" she yelled, as Danny deflected a crimson laser with his own ball of green energy (his pursuer had evidently given up on the trap).
"IT'S DANNY!" Danny called down to her. "DANNY PHANTOM, OK?"
"At least people have stopped calling him Inviso-Bill," muttered Sam, suddenly materialising at Kylie's elbow.
"Hello, Samantha," said Vlad.
"Vlad!" exclaimed Sam, apparently noticing him for the first time. "Kylie, that's Danny's arch-nemesis! We have to do something!"
"I don't really see what we can do right now, Sam," said Kylie, wishing there was more she could do to help Danny, as he ducked into an alley full of metal trash cans.
"STUPID THING!" the ghost hunter suddenly yelled with frustration, and threw the stubbornly unopened trap after him. There followed a metallic clunk, followed by a yell.
"Oh my God - DANNY!" exclaimed Sam, and sprinted into the alley.
"GHOST BOY!" wailed Paulina, running in after her.
The ghost hunter, meanwhile, disappeared behind a building, and moments later Valerie Gray emerged from behind it, apparently unnoticed by the crowd. Roland and Garrett watched as she walked towards the alley, just as Paulina wandered out of it shouting, "Ghost Boy? Where did you go?" Danny Fenton emerged from the alley next, with Sam supporting his right arm while he rubbed the back of his head with his left hand.
"Oh my God - Danny!" exclaimed Valerie, rushing over to him with arms outstretched. "Are you all right? I'd never forgive myself if I… I mean, what did that crazy ghost hunter bitch do to you?"
"Chillax, Val, I'm fine," said Danny, blushing furiously as she put a hand on his arm.
Garrett, meanwhile, had been watching this whole scene with the look of someone who can't quite believe the poor quality of the soap opera he's found on TV. He looked up at Kylie and said, "What have we blundered into?"
"Danny's the ghost boy," murmured Kylie.
"Really?" said Garrett. "Whoa. She's the ghost hunter!"
"Aww," Roland joined in, "how romantic."
"More whispering?" said Vlad. "Why doesn't one of you retrieve that trap and show Valerie what to do with it?"
"I'll show you what to do with it in a minute!" snapped Kylie, and strode towards the alley. She swept past Danny and Valerie, who were in the middle of a series of stuttered "I'm ok"s and "Are you sure"s; and Sam, who was just standing there with clenched fists and a twitch in her eye - and finally found the ghost trap nestling among the trashcans.
"This," she said, on taking it back to Vlad, "belongs to us. Now if you'll excuse us, I'd like to take my friends here and discuss exactly what we are going to do next."
"Oh yes?" Vlad's expression darkened. "You do realise, of course, that you'll never leave this place without my help. I could close your handy little Ghost Portal" - he snapped his fingers - "like that. I'd hate to have to do so, of course, without first having a little peek at your containment unit. You were planning on showing it to me, weren't you? Because if not… well, I see no point in keeping that door open any longer."
"Vlad," said Kylie. "Go screw yourself."
"See?" Garrett muttered to Roland, as the two of them began to follow Kylie through the dispersing crowd. "Told ya he was evil."
To be continued…