Title: Ticking Time Bombs
Rating: M
Summary: Renee was oblivious, and when she finally does decide to go through her parenting phase, Bella is thrown to Charlie, to be dealt with. Of course, living with a cop while also addicted to a few illegal substances, means things are bound to turn for the worst. But she wants a better life, she wants to be immune to the pain Edward had caused without having to put her life in danger, either in her race car or through the use of drugs. The pack enlists the resident druggy to set her straight.
Disclaimer: I don't own Stephenie Meyer's universe. I just like touching it.
Warnings: Cursing, drug use, drug abuse, underage drinking, street racing, kicked out of the house, imprint.
Spoilers: Not canon compliant. Takes place after Edward leaves, and after Bella's senior year of high school.
Author's Notes: Here's chapter 2 of the rewrite! We'll be getting to the pack soon, so we'll have a bit of drama :) Please let me know what you think, and if you have any questions, please ask! I don't have all of the chapters rewritten yet, so all the old chapters won't have this header on the tops of them. Chusssssss.
You may think I'm harmless, you could not be more wrong.
Careful what you do, I am just a ticking bomb.
You may think I'm laughing, you couldn't be more stupid.
I'm laughing 'cause I know that someday this ticking time bomb will explode.
- Skylar Grey, Ticking Time Bomb
Chapter 2: Going Clean
Bella expected, if anyone, Phil to be contacted. She did not expect, when she was released, for Renee to be standing out there, furious, and leaning against Bella's car. Oh, shit.
"What is this?" Renee demanded as soon as Bella pulled out her keys, unlocking the door. She did her best to ignore her mother. "Isabella Marie Swan, you answer me right now!"
"I'm sorry," Bella said quietly. They were two words Renee had never heard from her daughter... not for years, at least. That alone made Renee pause. "Can we just go home, please?"
"Phil dropped me off this morning. He's so disappointed in you, Bella..." Renee got in the passenger seat, wrinkling her nose at the state the back of the car was in. A blanket, some bunched up fast food bags, and a pack of cigarettes. They were unopened, but still, it made Renee's gaze turn furious in a second. "Do you smoke?"
"No. Cigarettes are disgusting," Bella lied. She did smoke, but not ... excessively. One cigarette a week, if that. It was more of a ... well, luxury. Phil was disappointed. Fuck. That made it worse.
But of course he was disappointed.
"Do you know how worried I've been?" Renee demanded as Bella parked behind Phil's truck. "I thought you were hurt! I thought you were in some serious trouble, Bella! And you're ignoring Phil's phone calls-"
"He called me as soon as I got pulled over. I couldn't answer," Bella stated simply.
"And then what else do we get? The police calling us in the middle of the night telling us that you've been arrested for speeding!"
"I know, Renee. You don't need to keep telling me the story. I was there."
When Bella entered, she faltered at seeing Phil sitting on the couch. The TV was off, the lights were dim. And there was a pad of paper on the otherwise empty coffee table. Double shit.
"Sit, Bella."
Bella sat immediately. Renee sat beside Phil and they were all silent. "What happened?"
"I was speeding on my way here," Bella answered. "I thought I left my curling iron on-"
"Bullshit."
Bella bit her lip, hating it when Phil did that. When he knew. Renee jumped in surprise, never seeing such behavior from her husband. "I was racing," Bella admitted. "I had a bad feeling about it, but... I kept going because I didn't care what happened. He caught me, found out I was related to Charlie, and said whatever and just had me spend the night... that was all."
"No drugs or alcohol?"
"None," Bella said simply. "I feel like you would have heard when they did the blood test."
Phil exhaled and glanced down at the notepad. "Your mother and I talked a long time about what would happen."
"So, where is it? Reform center? Therapy? Private gated community so I can learn the-"
"You're going back to Forks, Bella," Phil interrupted. Bella immediately stopped talking. "We decided... maybe spending some time with your dad is best for you."
She glanced down at the notebook and found Forks written in large letters. "I'm already out of high school... I'm taking a year off of college to save up some money... why would...?" She swallowed. "This is about my friends, right? You want me to get away from them, because of how I was in Forks last time?" She shook her head. "This time was different... Last time I was in Forks, my heart was shattered... He left with no other explanation other than he never loved me..."
"And I know that's why you rushed head into things here," Phil sighed. "But... Bella, it wasn't good for you to do that. You started to drown out the heartbreak by drowning yourself in everything else. So... let's... let's just try this. If it doesn't work... then you can come back and we'll try something else."
Bella glanced at Renee, to see the woman wringing her hands. "It's my fault. I should have been there for you, Bella. I should have been more of a mother, but instead you've been mothering me your entire life, and I suppose... I suppose that this was your time to be the teenager you should have always been." Renee glanced at her daughter, painfully. "I wish I could have been there for you like you were for me."
"I'm not dying," Bella said bitterly. "And yes, you should have. You should have been there for me. At least Phil tried to be. At least Phil tried to understand me. At least he had the sense to talk to me about where I was at night. You didn't even notice. You were so pent up with your own life, with your own husband, with your own projects, that you didn't even notice when your own daughter was drugging up, was sleeping with any man she could get ahold of, was drinking so much she couldn't remember her own name. Where were you, Renee? Where have you been the last year?"
Renee looked away, tears in her eyes. Innocent girl act didn't pull any weight here. "You should have been there," Bella finished. "I came back from Forks... I was a zombie. I don't know anything else to describe it better. I didn't eat, I didn't sleep... I couldn't. And who was there? Who was more of a parent to me than my own? Phil. And you know what? I blame you for marrying someone that was way to good for you. Because Renee, you've never been able to handle something for more than two weeks. You couldn't even handle me for more than two weeks. Two weeks of consoling me over my heartbreak, and then you expected me to be normal. And then it was two more weeks, about four months later, telling me we should go shopping and we should enjoy each other's company. I tried to make it work, but you wanted me to be ... to be some girl I wasn't, and I couldn't keep trying, especially when you stopped."
"I know."
Bella exhaled and ran her hands over her knees. It was a nervous habit she had. "When am I going to Forks?"
"We're giving you the option of either driving there or flying," Phil said after a moment. "If you drive, however, one of us will be going with you and flying back. If you fly, the same would happen."
"I'm nineteen. I can handle myself-"
"You're nineteen and you've just been arrested," Phil interrupted sharply. "Those are your only two options."
"I'd rather drive," Bella said simply.
Phil nodded. "Then start packing. We leave at noon."
Noon? But... It was nearly eight already. "Phil, perhaps tomorrow would be better."
"Noon," Phil said firmly, glancing towards his wife, who had spoken. "She needs to know that her actions have consequences. If we wait any longer, we may have to tell Charlie exactly why she was arrested."
"No, noon's fine," Bella rushed out. Phil nodded and Bella stood up, her hands clutched in front of her. "Charlie doesn't have to find out, right? He's... he doesn't need to know."
Phil sighed. "Very well. Start packing."
She did. She threw as much as she could into her suitcases, and then threw even more into the trunk of her car, getting whatever she could from her closet into it. Phil only brought a carry-on item, which she was almost grateful for. He seemed to know she would have picked him, over Renee, at least.
Then the trip began. Bella didn't say goodbye to Renee, she saw no need to. A phone call would suffice. Phil was quiet for the first hour, and then he leaned forward in his seat, going through the glove box. "You'll need to get rid of your cigarettes, you know. Charlie doesn't seem like the guy to allow smoking."
"He used to smoke for fifteen years," Bella stated simply. "If he doesn't want me smoking, then I won't smoke around him."
Phil let the subject drop. "Four drug charges and multiple speeding infractions?"
She sighed. "I know."
"Three of the drug charges were for others that were in your car, that were high, and you weren't. The speeding infractions were all yours."
"I know."
"Why, Bella?"
"Is this how it's going to be the entire car ride?"
"Not if we get it out of the way in the beginning."
She shook her head. "I ... I don't know. I got carried away..."
"Did he mess you up that bad?"
"I don't know... maybe?" She paused. "The cops told you my record, then?"
"I didn't tell Renee. They left a message on the machine, and I got to it first."
Bella cursed, switching lanes. "God, I'm sorry, Phil... I really am... It's just..."
"I know. I sort of gave up on you, didn't I?"
"No, I gave up on myself."
The rest of the trip, they forced themselves to talk into pleasant areas, on her future plans, on her future in general. On what she wanted to do, what she liked to do. And then Phil mentioned what she felt most uncomfortable about.
"You've grown."
"I hate it," Bella muttered. It was the second morning, after a long night of driving. They were almost there. "I feel like a weed. Five nine? Only ten months ago I was barely five five."
"Maybe it's the drugs?"
She snorted. "No. If anything, that stunts your growth." She glanced down at her skin, a more bronze color... it was strange. "I don't know how to explain it. It just happened. I feel like it happened within a few weeks, too. Four inches is a lot to grow, Phil." She turned into the exit for Washington. "I feel... weird, you know? Like I have this stomach bug. Ever since last night. I have that feeling in my stomach like something's wrong. And constantly fighting with Renee all year hasn't helped it at all."
"Just take it easy while you're here. Relax, maybe find someone else to steal your heart, and then just cliff dive your worries away, instead of drugs, instead of racing... please?"
"I can try. I don't even think there's a racing life here... or a drug life for that matter. It shouldn't be too hard," Bella admitted. She glanced at Phil. "Will you, um... well, can you call sometimes? You know, to check in. Make sure I'm not doing stuff I shouldn't be."
"Sure," Phil nodded. "I was once where you were, Bella. Don't let it control you. If I could get out of it, you can."
"Well, Bella can," Bella admitted. "Not who I was when I raced. She won't ever be able to get out."
"I don't even want to know, Bella."
She smiled. "Good. I wasn't going to tell you anyway."