Chapter 2 - Monday Blues

Lincoln sighed as he found himself staring drearily at the overcast sky outside the classroom's windows, and tried his best to return his attention to the subject at hand. Unfortunately, however, it was calculus; Mrs Johnson tried, she really did, but some topics are just dry, and very soon Lincoln found his thoughts wandering once more to what was really on his mind: his sisters' weird behaviour that morning.

The day had started like any other. Lincoln had woken up to his alarm clock, jumped out of bed, and rushed to the sole bathroom in the house, not wanting to be last in line. It had been going well enough, with him managing to snag a spot somewhere in the middle of the line, when he'd finally noticed something was off. He hadn't been able to quite put his finger on it, though, until Luna came out of the bathroom and greeted Luan, but walked past him without even a simple "Mornin', bro" to him.

This, in and of itself, would've only raised an eyebrow without any suspicions, but she hadn't been the only one who'd failed to acknowledge his presence. Lori had been too busy chatting with Bobby on the phone, which was normal, but Leni had just run by him without saying a word, Luan hadn't made a single pun or prank attempt towards him, Lucy hadn't spooked him, or asked him for help with a poem... most surprisingly of all, his most physical sister hadn't even kicked a ball in his general direction, or tried to wrestle with him, and while his body was thankful for the rare reprieve, he couldn't help but feel like something was wrong.

Then again, though, it's not like there weren't quiet mornings in the Loud House; they were an abnormality, occurring with perhaps the same frequency as a solar eclipse, but they still existed. Perhaps he'd just been overthinking it. Not an uncommon occurrence for the Man With The Plan, after all; he'd learnt that last year. And if that were all, he would've dropped it without much further thought.

But then there'd been how weird everyone was in Vanzilla...

Another sigh escaped Lincoln's lips, as he recalled just how weird they'd been on the ride to school. It had been an unusually quiet and awkward ride (Luna hadn't even played her guitar once during the trip), and none of his older sisters had so much as met his eyes. Instead, most had opted to look outside, focusing on the passers-by in the street. He'd wondered if he'd done something wrong, accidentally irritated his sisters, but he quickly canned the idea. They were usually much more direct when he did something they didn't like; the cold shoulder treatment was not something they often gave him.

There was also the fact that the twins had been unusually clingy throughout the ride, each in turn asking about his plans after school and fighting over who would get to play with Lincoln in the afternoon. At least in their conflict there was some normalcy, and Lincoln did admit he enjoyed the feeling of being wanted by Lola and Lana. They'd seemed so desperate to make sure he spent time with them at home later, that he just couldn't even consider saying no to them. In fact, it had almost felt like they'd been holding their breath, making sure he didn't have any plans besides spending time with them.

His mind snapped back to reality as the bell rang, signalling the end of the school day. Shaking his head to clear his thoughts, he shoved his books in his bag and prepared to go home. He was probably just being paranoid, just overthinking things again. Maybe his younger sisters were just enthusiastic about spending time with their favourite brother. Maybe the others just had something on their minds. Maybe this was just a one-off thing, and everything would be fine tonight. And if they weren't, Lincoln was sure he'd be able to figure out if something was wrong with his sisters; he'd grown up with them for almost a dozen years, after all, and could read all of their expressions like an open book. Either way, there was little else for him to do now, except focus on playing with Lana and Lola, and wait to see them later. He just hoped everything was fine with them, and not for purely altruistic reasons. If one of Lisa's experiments was going wrong, it would probably be prudent to find an excuse to grab Lily and spend some time outside the house, if Luan was in a bad mood she'd either be too depressed to make her usual jokes and cheer people up, or her jokes and pranks would become a bit more mean-spirited and extreme, and if Luna was in a bad mood she'd drown her sorrows by rocking out (and shattering all the glass in her room). And he didn't even want to consider what might happen to him if Lynn and Lori were upset...

"Hey, buddy? Everything okay?" Clyde asked Lincoln before Lincoln could shudder, concern colouring his tone, and Lincoln's mind snapped back to reality once more. Giving his best friend a small smile, Lincoln reassured Clyde: "Don't worry, pal. Everything's fine. I've just got a bit on my mind."

"Hey, I'm sure if anyone's got it figured out, it's the Man With The Plan." Clyde said sincerely, not a shred of doubt present in his mind and voice. Lincoln had to smile at that show of support, although his face soon stiffened as Clyde continued: "So, ready to head on over to Gus'?"

"Oh, sorry Clyde..." Lincoln began, feeling extremely guilty. His mind had been so pre-occupied by what had been going on earlier in the day, he'd actually forgotten that the pair had made plans yesterday to go back to the arcade after school today. He knew Clyde would understand though, and opted to be completely honest with his explanation: "It's just that Lola and Lana asked me to play with them today, and..."

"Say no more, man, I got you." Clyde said, knowing how much Lincoln doted on his little sisters. Lincoln still felt he had to apologise though, and started: "Look, Clyde, I'm really sorry..."

"No big. There's always tomorrow, right?"

"Yeah. Thanks, Clyde." Lincoln said, a sense of relief filling his chest. That sense of relief was quickly replaced by dread, as he checked his watch. "I've gotta go now; who knows what Lola and Lana will do to me if I'm late?!"

"See you tomorrow, Lincoln!" Clyde shouted at his best friend's receding back, as Lincoln sprinted out of the school at a speed that would have made Lynn proud. Shaking his head, he wondered if he should feel envy at his best friend's large close-knit family (and especially the affections his oldest sister...) or feel sympathy at how busy it kept him at times. After some thought, he decided to focus instead on making plans for what he and Lincoln would do tomorrow.

-THE LOUD HOUSE, THIRTY MINUTES LATER-

"Hey, Lana, Lola..." Lincoln began slowly, as he poured tea out for Lola and her stuffed animals while getting trying to not get tackled to the ground by Lana and Charles. The two paused in their activities and looked up at their big brother, eager to spend more time with him.

"Yes Lincoln? Should we take this outside, get some playtime in the mud?" The tomboy ventured excitedly.

"Lana, it's about to rain." The princess chided her twin sister, rolling her eyes.

"Exactly! The mud's gonna be so fresh!" Lana retorted, clearly relishing the prospect. Behind her, her more feminine twin gagged at the idea, but before anything further could be said, Lincoln finally continued: "I was just wondering... do you guys know where everyone else is?"

"Our sisters? Why?" Lana asked, looking nervously at her twin. They knew he was smart and caring, but they hadn't expected that question this fast. Thinking quickly, Lola adopted the most sad, pitiful expression she could, like an abandoned puppy at a dog shelter, and asked her brother: "Don't you like spending time with us?"

"What? No, of course I love spending time with you two!" Lincoln quickly said, worried by Lola's question, as he bent down to give her a hug. It felt like a stab to the heart, his beloved younger sisters asking if their big brother didn't like to be with them, and as he tried to reassure Lola he missed the slight blush tinging the flustered pageant princess's face as she received a sudden dose of her big brother's affection. He also missed the wink she slipped to an envious-looking Lana, although the envy and embarrassment were very quickly replaced by alarm when he continued: "It's just... I dunno, but it feels like there's something up, you know? With the way they were acting this morning? Luan didn't make any puns or pull any pranks, Luna wasn't jamming out, Lynn wasn't trying to wrestle me to the ground... Leni was wearing purple slippers with her yellow blouse, for God's sake! I just want to know if something's bothering- is everything okay, Lana?"

The twins didn't have a shared telepathic connection, but if they did, they'd both have heard each other mentally scream Dang it! at the top of the mental lungs as Lincoln trailed off towards the end of his explanation, studying Lana's face intensely. although the two would have slightly different causes for cursing. Lana would have been cursing at just how sweet, caring, and sharp her big brother could be at times, and Lola would have been cursing at the fact that her twin's worried expression could give up the entire gig. Before Lincoln or Lana could say or do anything, however, Lola shot a glare at Lana, and signalled with her fingers for her to commence Plan B.

That snapped Lana back, and she recovered with admirable timing, salvaging the situation with a quick explanation: "Oh, I'm fine, Lincoln. Just, you know, missing the mud outside and all. Anyway Lori said she's got shifts at Gus' all week, Leni's at the mall with her friends, Luna said she was rocking out with the band, Luan's Funny Business was booked til Sunday, Lynn said she was busy with soccer, football, and hockey training, Lucy's in the vents "writing poetry", and Lisa was doing a favour for the institute. Now let's go play in the mud!"

Lincoln could almost feel his eyes spinning as he tried to process and understand what Lana had just quickly said in a single breath. The gist of it, though, seemed to be that Lucy was probably in the vents reading Princess Pony again (he smirked at the memory), and the rest of his siblings were fine, albeit extremely busy. As the tomboyish twin dragged him out of the room and towards the yard, a smile graced his features as the gears started to turn for the Man With The Plan.

Meanwhile, back in the twins' room, Lola heaved a sigh of relief as Lana threw Lincoln into the mud, and began to wrestle with him. Closing the door, she turned to the vents, and asked: "Hey Spooky, you there?"

A loud sigh returned from the vents, which she took as an affirmative, and continued: "Tell Lori Lincoln suspects something, and they need to act more normal during dinner."

"Got it."

-CAROL PINGREY'S HOUSE, THIRTY SECONDS LATER-

"He what?!"

"Lynn, we're literally guests! Sorry, Carol!"

"It's okay, Lori. My parents are out on business for the week, and I know all about how your sisters usually are." Carol reassured the eldest Loud sister with an airy wave of her hands, before looking at the sporty Loud sister, and asking her best friend: "So, what's up with her?"

"Oh, nothing much. Just that the twerp's already suspicious, that's literally all." Lori sighed, although Carol detected a hint of fondness and pride in her tone. Carol wasn't surprised in the least, and pointed out: "Well, that's not that surprising. This is Lincoln, after all."

"What's that supposed to mean, dude?" Luna asked, looking up from the sheet music she'd been busy writing with a raised eyebrow, and Carol could suddenly feel the gazes of half a dozen Loud sisters burning a hole in her back as she finally realized how his older sisters could have interpreted her words. Heat rising to her cheeks, she defensively explained: "I mean... Lincoln's pretty sharp, right? And he knows you guys. Remember how he convinced Lori to participate in that family photo for your folks' anniversary?"

Lori's cheeks flushed with embarrassment at the memory of how he'd threatened to replace her with Carol. They were friends now, sure, but it was still a topic occasionally brought up lightly, when one of the two felt the need for some healthy ribbing. Of course, most of the Louds only knew that Carol had shown up as a ploy to persuade Lori; what they didn't know was how he'd convinced Carol to go through with his plan. The chip-toothed charmer really could be a natural when he wanted to be, and she could see the white-haired womanizer breaking a few hearts with his smile in a few years' time. Now Carol couldn't tell if her heated face was because of Luna's insinuations, or if it was due to the memory of how Lincoln had shown up with a bouquet, a box of chocolates and a crooked grin, saying that there was nobody else in the world who could even hope to compare to the Lori Loud.

That was still a fond memory to Carol, and the confidence boost Lincoln had given to her ego had played a huge role in her eventually uploading her selfies, which had led to that minor selfie competition between her and Lori, which had then led to the two of them becoming friends. A smile tried to find it's way unto her face at the memory, but she suppressed it with sheer force of will. Fortunately for her, attention had been taken away by the comedic Loud making some joke that had the rest of them groaning, and her ears tuned back to the present just in time to hear the four-year-old prodigy declare: "Well, according to my calculations, he shouldn't have been able to figure out anything was wrong until at least Wednesday."

"Well, the fact is, he's literally picked it up already." Lori snapped back. Knowing Lisa's reputation, and wondering how the young Loud could have miscalculated, Carol inquired: "Have you guys been doing anything out of the ordinary that might've tipped him off?"

"Negatory, Pingrey. I treated him exactly like how I usually would."

"I was literally too busy organizing things with my Bobby Boo Boo Bear."

"Yeah, dude, I didn't give little bro anything that might have spilled the beans."

"Tipped him off? But I didn't even tip a bucket of water on his head this morning! Get it?"

"Don't look at me, I made sure not to be the one to tell him this time."

"I totes didn't say a word to him, so I'm, like, sure he couldn't have figured out I was lying to him."

"Wait..." Carol said, rubbing her temples, as Leni's words finally put the rest of the sister's statements into perspective. "So you're telling me, that you guys were so scared of letting him know you guys were up to something... that none of you even talked to him today?"

There was a pause, as realization dawned on most of their faces. Lynn was the first to speak up: "I knew I should've helped in distracting him as well. No way would he be able to figure out a thing if he was being distracted by Lynnsanity over here."

Carol couldn't deny that Lynn had a point; she doubted Lincoln would've even been able to move or think, let alone figure out anything was wrong, once Lynn was done with him. The other sisters clearly had something to say, though, and Carol braced herself at the inevitable explosion of chaos that would occur. Before she could dive behind the couch, however, Lori intervened, and Carol found herself marvelling at Lori's ability to handle her sisters as she barked at Lynn: "Lynn! Are you quitting on the plan?"

The change was nearly instantaneous, as the sporty Loud shouted: "Lynn Loud never quits!"

"That's right, Lynn... look guys, clearly we'll need to revise our approach, but that's no reason to throw this plan out already! We want to throw Lincoln the best surprise party ever, right?"

"""""Of course!"""""

"Then let's stick to this plan for now, since it's literally the best we've got. If we need to, we'll change our plans to the Man With The Plan as and when needed, but for now..."

The other Loud sisters sighed, realizing they'd agreed to continue avoiding their brother for the rest of the week, unless things drastically changed. Carol found herself slightly envying the Loud family once again; as an only child, she could only ever long for the type of familial love that the Louds clearly displayed for each other. A smaller part of her, one that surprised her, also found herself envying the fact that they were clearly recipients of their brother's love, to be willing to go this far for him. Then again, though, while she'd love to have Lincoln as a younger brother, it'd make some of the thoughts she had of him even more inappropriate than they already were. Mentally shrugging, she decided to settle for small blessings. Curiosity got the better of her, though, once the envy had cleared, and as the Louds went back to work she whispered to Lori: "Actually, why is it so important for this to remain a surprise? Like, I get that surprises are good, but it seems like you guys might be taking this a bit far..."

Lori sighed, wondering how much she could tell her best friend. Eventually, she settled for saying as much as she felt comfortable with, and began: "We... well, we just don't want to ruin his birthday surprise for him, not like everything else literally we've ruined."

"It's Lincoln, I'm sure he'd understand-"

"He would, Carol... and that's why we don't want to disappoint him. Look, you remember that video contest?"

"You mean the one with the video of him kissing that weird statue, pretending it was some girl from his class, which freaked her out so much she transferred to another class? It's a legend in Royal Woods!"

"Yeah... he uploaded embarrassing moments of all of us, envious that he was the only one of us all with no achievements or trophies, you know?"

"You've told me this story a dozen times, Lori, including the part where he realized his mistake, quickly deleted those videos before most people saw, and uploaded that video of him instead, to make sure nobody would remember the first video. I think that's one of the sweetest things I've heard him do, even if the fault lay with him, at the start."

"What I may have neglected to mention, though, is that for that he was literally made fun of for months, Carol, including by some of us, when we were upset. Between that, Lola literally being the biggest tattle-tale around, us making fun of him when we found out he read a Princess Pony comic... point is, those incidents broke a lot of the trust between all of us, and even now, sometimes, I can see his hesitation when he wants to tell us something. Like he's literally wondering if it'll be used against him or something. That's why we want to prove to him that, at least, we can keep some things a secret, you know?"

Carol hadn't heard that part before, but she tried not to judge. After all, she'd never been in any similar sort of situation, and couldn't really understand the big deal. She could, however, at least see how much it clearly meant to her best friend, and her sisters, and presumably how much it meant to Lincoln. Sighing, Carol placed a hand on Lori's shoulder, and comforted her: "Then I'm sure you guys will succeed; I know how much you guys love your little brother, after all! If you guys think this is the best way to show your love, I don't think any force on the planet could stop you guys!"

-THE LOUD HOUSE, LATER THAT EVENING-

"What... what is this?" Lori stammered out, staring at the dinner table in front of her like it had grown a fanged mouth and just eaten her phone.

And at least she was articulating; behind her, most of her sisters were only able to vocalize grunts of disbelief.

Standing at the head of the table, Lynn Sr clapped Lincoln's shoulder proudly, and said: "Well, girls, your brother heard about how busy you all were today, so he volunteered to help me make dinner!"

"It was nothing. I just wanted to show just how much I love my sisters, that's all." Lincoln said humbly, a tinge of red colouring his cheeks.

To his surprise, though, instead of ravenously digging in like he'd have expected, most of them groaned and looked away. Unbeknownst to him as he asked if they were okay, if they were just too tired to eat, if he should refrigerate some of the food and pack it for their lunches tomorrow morning, his attempts to express his affection and concern for his siblings were just making them feel even worse, even as they tried to force casual smiles on their face and reassure their brother. They hadn't hardened their resolve a scant few hours ago expecting it to be so sorely tested already, after all.

Author's Note: And here we are, with the second chapter. And what a pain in the arse of a chapter it was to write. It took me perhaps three rewrites before I even had a rough idea on how the general structure of the chapter should go, although that's probably due to the fact that I don't really plan out these stories. Just jumping in and writing what feels "right" (and rewriting what feels wrong) does produce content I'm satisfied with, but by Jove does it require a lot of patience and work. I didn't even intend for the section in Carol's house, let alone for it to be mostly from her perspective. And Lori's explanation may not be... completely accurate, in that segment; it's just how much she feels comfortable sharing with her friend. I don't think she'd share with her former rival the events of No Such Luck, after all, or the Sister Fight Protocol, or how they fought for the Sweet Spot in Vanzilla, at the very least.

Also I'm honestly really grateful for all the reviews I've gotten; y'all truly be way too kind to this random rambler. And as for the question of whether this will end up with possible Loudcest... I have no clue. Honest. I've got no idea how to even write Loudcest, but then again it's not like I had any clue how to write this story either 'til I sat down and just started typing. And, like I mentioned earlier... I don't really plan these stories in advance, I just write them as I see them progressing. If Loudcest feels like a possible and natural progression, I might give it a crack; I can even see some ways it might end up that way. But if it doesn't work out that way, I'm not gonna make the characters act out-of-character to force it.

No idea when the next chapter's gonna be; things here seem like they're gonna get real busy. Honestly, I didn't even expect to get this chapter out as fast as I did.