Before Note: Seeing that this is a Mary-Sue Fanfiction Parody she didn't get electrocuted and die... well... she did
but... THIS IS A MARY-SUE SO IT DOESN'T HAVE TO MAKE SENCE! Whatever after the electrocution she got kicked out,
pouted and now some how she's their maid. Also in this chapter she's a demon. Sorry but this chapter is kind of
long.
This is what follows...
Lavender Jane was doing the job of a maid perfectly. She swept all the floors without a spot of dirt, yet still with the
grace of butterfly. Then went to clean the garden, not a leaf was on the floor. She took away all the bruised petals
of roses and unsaveable roses were cut without hesitation. Everything was perfect. From the house's condition to
the garden. Fin*nian and Mey-rin were mad at the sight she did their jobs better than them. Finally it was time for
her to cook the meal. For dinner she went to cook some Smoked Salmon with Caviar with a side of Parsley/Parmesan
Mushrooms. For a beverage she made some Earl Grey tea. Bardroy was enraged at the sight of her perfect cooking.
She set the table CLAUDE FAUSTUS STYLE, the most unnecessary way to set up a table. She jumped up in the air
throwing a table in the air along with herself and everything on the table. She threw plates and cups along with
chairs and silver wear onto the table. Then landing on both her feet. She looked up and a bow fell perfectly into her
hair. Sebastian was very upset, and you don't want to upset Sebby, oh no. She brought the meal out to Ciel.
Presenting it with grace.
"Today's meal shall be Smoked Salmon with Caviar. For a side you will be eating Parsley/Parmesan Mushrooms. For
your tea you will be drinking Earl Grey." She said as she presented the meal.
"Earl Grey?" Ciel asked.
"Don't worry, it was harmless for him." Lavender Jane took the bad pun Sebastian was supposed to make.
Sebastian clenched his hand so tightly that it began to bleed, a lot.
"Sebastian are you okay..." Bardroy asked timidly. Sebastian clenched tighter, "Seba-"
"I'm fine..." Sebastian had his demon-y shadow behind him, startling Bardroy. Bardroy walked away slowly.
Finnian and Mey-rin were fixing up their young master's room.
"Stupid little... CUN-taminated water..." Finnian struggled not to curse.
"Thinking she can take OUR job, being so Claude Faustus, who does she think she is?" Mey-rin said with anger.
"...a douche..." Finnian answered as he folded their young master's clothing.
"She's more full of shit than Opra's tampons." *OPRA GOT BURNED BY MEY-RIN! No offence Opra.* Mey-rin said
making Ciel's bed.
"It looks like a bunch of red pubic hair was glued onto her head." Finnian said as he dusted Ciel's pictures.
"Stupid Bitch." Mey-rin said in an angry tone as she swept the floor.
"I can't believe how coooool she thinks she is." Finnian grabbed Ciel's cane. *CRACK!* Went Ciel's cane. Finnian had
broken his young master's cane.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" The both of them screamed in horror.
"You broke the young master's cane!" Mey-rin yelled. They screamed more and more.
While this was happening...
Ciel sat finishing his dinner, he heard a loud scream. Then Finnian and Mey-rin ran to Ciel crying.
"Sorry young master!" The two repeated as they held out the broken cane. Ciel sighed.
"Another broken cane... What ever, Sebastian let's go." Ciel ordered.
Sebastian got on one knee and said "Yes my- urhgn!" Sebastiand tried to say.
"Sebastian can't go with you because his toe is broken, let me." Lavender Jane said as she Sebby's poor toe with
her heel.
"YOU BITCH!" Sebastian yelled as he held his toe.
"Let's let him rest." She suggested.
"AAAAAAAAAH!" Sebastian groaned.
"Very well, I guess you can go with me." Ciel said, "Sebastian, get some rest."
"Be-" Sebastian said meakly.
"That's an order." Ciel finish. Sebastian whined *poor Sebby* to his room.
When Ciel left to get his cane with Lavender Jane, the servants and Sebastian met up.
"I think we should kill her!" Finnian suggested.
"YEAH MURDER THE BITCH!" Mey-rin agreed.
"I think we should just get her fired..." Bardroy suggested.
"BURN THE BITCH DOOOOOWN!" Sebastian yelled as he denied Bard's idea.
"Yeah!" The three screamed.
"Now come on let's be-" Bardroy said rationally but was interrupted by Finnian.
"She said your hair looked stupid and your food tasted like deep fried raccoon asshole." Finnian said honestly.
"..." Bard paused, "...What did she say..." Bardroy asked. Bard thought for a second before speaking. "BURN, THE
BITCH DOOOOOOWN!" They all cheered at Bards joining of their motion.
As those four had their little... party... Ciel went out to the town with Lavender Jane.
They walked into a store. Lavender Jane opened the door for Ciel. As they walked into the store Ciel bought a cane.
But their walk turned out to be for a couple of hours. It had turned dark. Minutes later they got home.
"Borchin we should go to bed." Lavender Jane stated.
"Firstly it's Bocchan. Secondly I don't care." Ciel went to his room and dressed himself (cuz he's a BIG BOY!). Then
Ciel went into his bed. Lavender Jane then went into his room and tried to seduce him. I won't exsplain it in detail or
I'll immediatly kill off this Mary-Sue and not bring her back to life...
Ever...
"EWWWWWW! WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING!" Ciel screamed, pushing Lavender Jane away.
"But this is the part were I have sex with you..." Lavender Jane said with dissapointment.
"WHY WOULD I HAVE SEX WITH YOU! YOU LOOK LIKE SOMEONE HIT YOU IN THE FACE WITH A BASEBALL BAT AND
THEN RAN OVER YOUR FACE WITH A CAR!" Ciel screamed.
"I do NOT look like Justin Beiber!" *Beibern! No offence to his fans... offence to his face...* The Sue screamed in
horror that Ciel would go that far. Then, out of nowhere, the servants and Sebastian came screaming with a crucifix.
"BURN THE BIIIIIIIIIITCH!" They screamed. They tied her up onto it and the servants beat her face with glass
bottles. Sebastian kicked her in the gut then swung his foot up and broke her jaw.
"Urf.. merg... eeeeeeeeeh..." Lavender couldn't speak no matter how hard she tried. Finnian grabbed a jug of
gasoline and poured it all over the Sue and Crucifix.
"Burn the bitch... burn the bitch... burn the bitch..." Mey-rin, Sebastian and Finnian repeated. Bardroy then took his lit
cigarette and threw it on a mini cross, the cross light on fire quickly. Then, Bardroy threw the cross on Lavender.
"AAAAAH!" The Sue screamed.
"Haha, she's burning faster than BP is loosing credibility." *BP GOT BUUURNED* Bardroy chuckled. They threw the
dead carcus in a river or something and left. That's all.
A/N: If you didn't notice she's a demon, also I didn't make the BP joke that was made by Jacksfilms on youtube. This
isn't advertisment I just thought the joke was super duper funny and I had to use it. You can see the video here:
.com/watch?v=Umf4itG1Cc4 .
Now that we're done with that unpleasant-ness if you have any questions leave them in the reveiws or message me
or whatever way you have, it'll get to me. Also I'm in a summer camp currently so it may take me a while to update
on chapters but the next chapter will be done and published in the next week or so. Also I DID NOT mean to offend
any one with the burns I made on Opera and Justin Beiber please do not get offended. Also if you're asking, "DUDE
THAT SO OFFENSIVE! WHY DID SHE USE A CRUCIFIX!" that was cause I thought it would be perfect for killing Mary-
Sues with :).