Part Two: East Kaioshin
Gohan was too smart to continue dating evil incarnate, so he decided to test out the opposite end of the spectrum: a god.
He'd visit his holy boyfriend on his holy planet, where everything was beautiful and perfect. Eventually, the subject of sexytimes came up.
"Of course I can have sex! I wouldn't be a god if celibacy was a requirement." "Whew, thank God." "You're welcome!" "LOLZ"
The half-Saiyan began removing his shirt when the supreme being touched his arm. "It's a little more complicated than what you're picturing, Gohan. There's a ritual involved."
Gohan paused. "That sounds interesting. What do I need to do?"
"First, you will put on the sacred fleece." Shin held out his hands, and a bulky pile of blue clothing appeared on them.
"Isn't it kind of hot out for that?" "Oh yes. It'll be VERY hot," Shin replied, winking.
Gohan put the sacred outfit on and immediately began sweating under the stifling fleece. A terrifying realization then dawned on the young man. "Supreme Kai... is this a Snuggie?"
"Yes! Do you like it?" " Well uh... It's not very flattering..." "Oh?" The little god's clothing instantly changed into a white Snuggie. He then asked sexily, "Is it flattering NOW?"
Gohan swallowed. "It looks better on you than it does on me. Maybe I should take mine off?" "No! Besides, it's too late- the ceremony is beginning!"
"Ceremony? I thought we were just going to f-..." The half-Saiyan lost his voice at the sight of Kibito shuffling towards the pair, also clad in a white Snuggie. As he came closer he began to shuffle faster, filling Gohan with a rising panic.
Then, the two holy beings stood on each side of Gohan, each taking hold of one of his hands. They began to gyrate oddly and hum.
Gohan wasn't sure whether to laugh or scream.