A/N: Here is the second chapter. Umm dadaduum... Oh warnings; this may or may not be a slash fic hence the Bella/Victoria pairing. It all depends on my sister. It will be graphic; this story is mostly for my benefit so I could care less about reviews and whatnot. I only ask that you don't make stupid PM's like "hey this should be labeled AU" or "Hermione/Bella wouldn't act like this blah blah..."

First off (insert ghetto head shake and finger wavin') all fan fiction is AU- these are the ways I will and are going to portray characters get over it-. It is believe me because if it wasn't than guess what? That's plagiarism. And is frown upon in most countries, by the way this chocolate is the only kind anywhere that is made by a waterfall and that my children you can take to the bank,(sorry for random wily wonka quotes… I am sometimes random)

Secondly, it is my story emphasis on "my" I will accept critics and how to "develop" my writing so too speak. I will accept any suggestions but I will not tolerate flames, bashings, or bad advertisement. If you don't like how much I change point of views or narratives i.e. first person, second, person, and caveman speech than guess what? If you could see my face does it look like I care?!. So there I hope you all have basked in my glorious rant long enough (it was glorious isn't It.) on ward with the story!

Disclaimer: I am pretty positive that I do not own Twilight or Harry potter. I will not, nor have I ever created a fictional world (real in my opinion hm.) that millions of people worship nor have I created bloodsucking sparkly faeries opps vampires: p my bad, so yeah… I'm just a humble servant in the land of fan fiction. P.s. Hermione/Bella will be….. Odd.

Chapter two: Decisions, Decisions

Jacob

I don't know why bells would do such a, a stupid fucking thing. Of all the times she had to do something reckless she picked now. Now! I mean she could have died! Fucking died! And then where would I be!? Alone I tell you alone with no one but the pack and my fucking dad. And this! This is my god damn payment for taking care of her, for healing her! Fuck that! He thought as he walked over to the pale creature on his couch. Hmm I wonder what pop will say to the seas smell, probably burst a vessel, a dead friend and a ruined couch in the same day, god forbid that shit.

"Ooh, ugh bloody fucking hell I feel like a bus hit me oh ugh." Bella muttered twisting and groaning, I sniffed the air around her. That sea water made her smell different. Sniff. Completely different.

"I'm going to fucking kill Ron." she hissed clenching her small fists. First, Jacob thought, who the hell is Ron and why would little ole Bella want to kill him?

"Bella? Bella honey?" I whispered reaching for her forehead; shit the freckled sky if I had to deal with a sick Bella.

Suddenly I find myself on the floor with a snarling crazed looking mess on top of me. More amused with how she knocked him down he really did think of why or how it was possible.

"Bella… what are you doing?" he asked a small smirk hinting at his lips. She snarled again, snarled. You've got to be shitting me. "Bella, calm the fuck down." he cautioned. Trying to shift away from her.

"Who the hell are you!" she sneered. She fucking sneered! Bella sneer what the hell happened to her in that water?

"Bella it's me Jacob, Jake."Shit did my voice just break? I threw my hands up in surrender.

"Jake?" she wondered… than a glazed look fell on her face. "Jacob, Jacob black." She muttered a calculating. She twisted off my chest in a surprisingly graceful move. Bella? Graceful? What the hell?

"Bella." He called out, she ignored him, she circled the living room inspecting every little trinket and furniture the same glazed calculating look on her face, what a way to make me feel good bells. Finally after smelling my room –which she gave an ego blowing disgusted look- which was a dick move, I cleaned it especially for her .she turned and faced me.

"Well Jake." She quotation my name like I wasn't who I said I was." I thank you for saving me but, I would greatly appreciate it if you would take me home, to my house. Yeah." Her voice was less… fumbled like all of a sudden she took formal speech class. A slight accent rolled off her tongue. I say again what the fuck?

"Bella, I don't think..."

"Well that's great!" she snarked "a wolf that doesn't think. Oh how sad. Now take me home or you know I can drive myself." She declared heading for the door "and by the way jakeykins call me Isabella, Bella sounds so…. Short!" she chirped sounding proud of herself and was out of the door faster than I could blink. What. The. Fuck.

Hermione

Isabella Marie Swan… this was my atlas? A pitiful girl who had self sacrificing urges and likes sparkly faeries. Well shit, it's like a weaker less brilliant female version of harry. Although I think it was fiery dragons he liked better. He swore off faeries ever since Lockhart. Poor bloke. Why didn't this truck go over sixty?

Oh and ugh it smelled like, peppermint and gasoline. What the hell? Who would even put those two smells together? No wait you know what I remember in third year Sybil's room smelled like gasoline … and sherry bottles*. And... Oh! It was coming to me. Charlie, my "dad" bought me this rust bucket, for a welcome home present. Apparently Bella fell head over heels for it and basically is the cause for most of the arguments with the sparkly Cedric opps Edward. But hell, he did look an awful lot like cedric. It was kind of freaky. And the girl was more of a danger magnet than harry! Honestly!

Vampires, werewolves, I mean shite, I thought as I pulled into the swan residence. What the hell did she do in a past life to deserve this?

Climbing out of the car I walked to the front yard highly aware of the giant wolves "hidden" in my trees. Why didn't Charlie just hunt them in his own back yard?

I pushed the door open-why it wasn't locked was beyond me- the yellow painted walls and mismatched chairs were oddly comforting, with a pang I realized it reminded me of Luna. I missed her dearly, despite popular belief that I disliked her or frown upon her; I was actually in love with the girl. We were best friends ever since third year.

I was in the library looking up a strange creature I saw fluttering amongst the halls. When Luna, my sweet little moon comes up to me –out of nowhere might I add- and tells me I'm a rubbish searcher and that my hunt was going dead, so she pulled me away and I, the curious lion I am followed her.

She led me to the Room of Requirements. It had transformed into her kitchen. The circular walls made me feel open and free the brightly painted... well everything gave off a cozy, be your-self vibe. I lovedit. And then she pulled out the lovegood journals. I read well into the night I interviewed her family's portraits. The information all came together the facts were true and I even believed her legally blind aunt that she had seen a black unicorn. It was a start of a beautiful friendship, she made me open my eyes to the world and how I didn't know everything and that not everything was found in books. I stayed with her and Xeno every summer for three months and holidays, my parents became very recluse with me and only showed up for weekly money transactions. By the beginning of fifth year I was moved in with them, Luna and I became more than sisters we were soul twins, we had shared everything and I mean everything. The real reason I went to the lovegood house was for the soul purpose of seeing my twin not for some deathly hallows crap that both I and papa lovegood already knew.

It amuses me some that Bella's Alice is quite like my Luna; maybe I'll have my twin back.

My nap at the blacks-honestly the blacks where is Sirius when you need him- and the drive here gave me enough time for Bella's memories to fully download, I knew everything about her too.

It freaked me out, what prideful women would ever lose her self like that over a boy, and that was what Edward was a boy. What man-creature or not- would ever leave a clumsy, vulnerable, self pitying girl in the woods? The woods! I growl, who the bloody hell does that.

It was sad and pathetic and you know what I want some damn pudding.

Several hours later

After four servings of pudding and a hot shower later, I was sitting in my/Bella's room. I admired her literature but romantic tragedy's I think this host has had enough of so I created a bone fire outside in the back yard and lit all of the things –except for the clothes- that had anything to do with the Cullen's, well whatever was left after Eddie boy twirled in here. And made a list of paints I wanted to get over at the local home depot. I made Charlie dinner-steak and mash potatoes- he would need it, I thought after seeing his note that his friend harry had died.

cleaned the house pulled some weeds and the BAM! It hit me. This is obviously and alternative universe did I still have my magic? Would I be the one and only of my kind?

Answer to number one I found out was correct, I may have dropped the TV while cleaning it and I highly doubted having your TV broken and a best friend dead would be his highlight of the day. So I fretted, made random penguin noises and BAM! It was repaired, like that. I spent an hour praising Luna for teaching me wand less magic.

And do you know what the first thing I did once I realized I could do magic. I gave myself big bouncy caramel colored curls. I am a Gryffindor through and through; I missed my lion's mane besides who wanted just plain straight hair? I know I didn't.

I also put up basic house wards around the house, you know I really did not need wolves or vampires coming up in here ruining whatever life I was to make here. Anyhoo it was 11:00 pm. I think Charlie is grown enough to get food himself so I took myself to bed, creating plans to visit the Cullen's house. I wonder how flammable there house is.

Luna

I had hoped my sister will have found out that she could still use magic, how I knew? Well are bond was still living. And soon once I get rid of Neville's whiny arse I can be with my sister. I wonder if Alice's mate would take it too hard when I tell him Alice is a lesbian. But know was the time for planning mione and I would be the first of our kind in the new world. We will need to establish order and a government. And quite frankly that takes time. Hm. I wonder if she'll let me take a few nargles. Helpful little buggers.

"Luna! Love! Come on! The snorkacks are blooming!" daddy yelled. Oooh I would bring some of this litter to Hermione she loves snrokacks.

"Coming daddy!" I tossed some Hermione roses into the ritual dish a blessing of luck towards my sister.

Jake

"Jacob! Why the hell is my couch soaking wet!"

"Ah hell"

A/N: ya! Here is my new chapter Ya!