He gets a call from his home number at work towards the end his lunch break, and he finds it odd she's still at the apartment in the middle of the day. Though, he had no idea what she did otherwise, and will have to make a note to ask her one of these days. Caught off guard, he answers it with a neutral, "Hey."
"I'm about seven weeks pregnant."
Sometimes a typical greeting isn't such a bad idea. "You are?"
"So says my doctor."
"A trustworthy one, I'm hoping." Seven weeks. He goes back through the days in his head. This meant that the night of conception had been that night in the motel. Of course.
"I had a life before you," she reminds. Yeah, that's the unsettling part, but he obviously doesn't tell her this. "Anyway, I just called to let you know. She gave me pamphlets to read."
"Good to know," he chuckles. "Hey, my lunch break is pretty much over…"
"Then I'll see you when you get home," she says, voice light (and almost teasing if he didn't know any better), and hangs up.
It's the most normal conversation they've ever had.
... ...
According to the pamphlets, the mother-to-be could be experiencing morning sickness as early as the fifth week, which would probably explain why she ran for the bathroom when he cracked open a can of Pepsi. Needless to say, all of the soda he had was tossed out the very next day (he dropped them off at Mount Justice for the others).
"Soda is a no, then," he says, earning a glare from across the table. "Alcohol is obviously a no, too. Not too much coffee, and beware fresh fruit juices and unpasteurized milk."
"Who the hell drinks unpasteurized milk?"
He rolls his eyes. "I'm just reading what it says. We have to figure out what you're able to eat and drink."
She purses her lips but doesn't say anything, just lets him read the rest of the pamphlet to her to tell her that soft cheeses, undercooked meat, anything with raw seafood and eggs, deli meats, and leftovers are now off of the menu. They always have takeout, or something easy they can just heat up in the oven or microwave for dinner, so pretty soon one of them has to start actually cooking their meals.
He has a bad feeling that it's going to be him.
... ...
She likes to pretend that this doesn't change anything, even though it has.
He's 100% sure she's keeping it. She hasn't given him a solid answer, and if she's been to more appointments then she's been hiding them from him, but he just knows. She carries herself differently now, taking it easier on herself. She pretty much does everything the pamphlets tell her to do and avoids the things they tell her not to do. It's more than good to know she's just as serious about this as he is.
Her hair is tied back into a ponytail that night and she tosses the stack of pamphlets onto his lap as she settles beside him on the couch, folding her legs and tucking them under herself. She has two spring rolls and a scoop of vanilla ice-cream on her plate. They're not touching or anything, but still. Gross.
He opens a pamphlet and points to where it says 'you could be experiencing food cravings and aversions' underneath Week 9.
She knocks it out of his hand and snatches the remote from him.
Yeah, she's still in control. The more limits the pregnancy puts on her, the more she tends to take it out on him. If anything, her control has only doubled.
As she is flipping through the channels, his phone rings and he picks it up without really checking so it takes him by surprise when Cassie is suddenly exclaiming into his ear, "They set a date!"
"What are you talking about?"
"Green Arrow and Black Canary? They set a date already!" There is a squeal beside her, which he guesses is M'gann since Artemis doesn't squeal and Suzie seems a bit too soft-spoken to.
Jade throws him a look and he shakes his head. "Well, that's great, and all. But they got engaged a month ago. What's the rush?"
Cassie laughs. "Gee, do you always have to be the stick-in-the-mud, Roy? With our work, the question's more like what isn't the rush?"
"Then why haven't I heard anything official about you and Kaldur?"
She makes this noise that's halfway between a scoff and a gasp, and he tries not to laugh. He can imagine the girl has a blush on her cheeks, and probably would have punched him with her superhuman strength and left an ugly bruise had he been standing next to her when he said it. "I called to tell you ahead of time and you repay me by teasing me? Roy Harper, I thought you were a gentleman."
"Yeah, well, things change." He wonders if the fact his arm drops over Jade's shoulder as he is saying this, his hand brushing her forearm, is pure coincidence or if it's supposed to mean anything.
(He's going to deem it a coincidence and move on.)
... ...
He kind of assumed that when she figured out she was pregnant and started adjusting her diet and habits then she also understood that there was to be no more Cheshire.
It was just such a given in his mind that it hadn't crossed that she might still be doing her work until he walked into Mount Justice and found there to be more chaos than normal.
Several members of the League crowded around the large, circular platform with varying degrees of distress and contemplation on their faces, so much so that he barely had to look at anyone before the words, "What happened?" were being yelled out of his throat. They all kind of pause and look at him, then at each other, and then back at him.
"Roy," Dinah murmurs, like she's hesitant as to how she wants to deliver the news. She stands in front of him, looks up into his eyes, and sighs. "They got hurt."
"What?" He practically yells at her.
She winces at his volume but says nothing. Ollie moves to stand beside the both of them, shoulders stiff with worry. Diana has her fingers over her temples. Barry is pacing a hole through the floor. Hal has his arms crossed and is kind of just standing there, frozen or something. Even Clark is there, hands clenched into fists so tight that his knuckles lose their color, with Orin and Red Tornado at his side.
The only mentors, he notes, that are not present are Bruce and J'onn. Bruce is in charge of the Team, the entire League, so if there's a problem then he's definitely there. But if J'onn was gone…
"M'gann?" he asks. Dinah and Ollie look at each other. "Was it M'gann? What the hell happened?"
Dinah takes his hand and draws a shaky breath and fills him in on everything.
On how the Team was tasked with retrieving more information, how they had ended up being tailed by Shadows assassins, how they had been drawn out to a construction site that was a dead end and had no choice but to fight, how Conner had been about to knock out the one assassin that hadn't been taken care of when M'gann had leapt and taken the blow and had lost a lot of blood and they're just not sure.
"Shadows?" he barely gets out. His blood is cold and he has half a mind to run back out and back to the apartment before he can ask, "Who in the Shadows?"
"They identified three." This from Ollie. "Hook, Black Spider, and Cheshire."
He doesn't stay to hear the rest.
... ...
He finds her soaking in the bathtub. They bring back memories of that night in the motel, those small traces of blood swirling around in the water, except now he actually cares that it's there.
"What the hell were you thinking?" he yells. He's pissed and knows what she did was stupid and wrong, but he can tell that she knows it, too, because she actually flinches when he bursts into the bathroom and her jaw kind of falls open a little when she's looking up at him. He knows what she looks like when she's hesitant or maybe even kind of scared, but she's guilty now, too, and it's there on her face.
"It had to be done!" she shouts back. "It was a job that Cheshire would've taken, and if I hadn't, they would've known something was wrong."
"And that's reason enough to endanger yourself and the baby?"
"The baby is perfectly fine." She stands from the tub, water spilling out, and wraps a towel around herself. Her hand falls over her stomach as she says, "I wasn't stupid, Roy. I knew to be careful."
"No," he argues, though voice lower this time, "if you knew to be careful then you wouldn't have gone and done it at all. You wouldn't have taken the risk. You could've gotten yourself killed tonight."
"You underestimate me, don't you? Or you overestimate your little sidekick friends," she sighs. But instead of exasperated and teasing, her tone is strained and a bit forced. "Besides, killing off Cheshire was the plan from the beginning. Or did you think I was in it for the praise or the money?"
"It sounds like something Cheshire would do." He crosses his arms. "And I heard what M'gann did."
"Your little Martian friend chose to jump in front of that hit. I didn't need her to save me," she hisses back. "I had my way out of that situation."
"It was still M'gann's blood that got spilled to save you."
"Something Hook and Black Spider know nothing about. All they know is Cheshire is fatally wounded, lost a lot of blood, and is out of commission. They won't come looking for me."
She steps out of the tub and cinches the towel a little tighter around herself. He watches her the entire time, eyes narrowed from behind his mask, and when she tries to walk past him and into the bedroom he grabs her arm. It's not with nearly enough strength to hold her, and she can easily slip away, but she indulges him a little by not freeing herself. She doesn't look at him, though, not even as she speaks.
"The baby is fine," she murmurs. "My doctor… she vaguely knows about my work. I just got back from a private check-up not long before you came storming in. The baby is fine," she repeats.
He doesn't lessen his grip but instead runs the pad of his thumb across her smooth skin. "No more Cheshire."
"Cheshire ended today, Roy. She's dead." She slips herself out of his hold and waits until she's already in the bedroom to say, "For now."
... ...
The atmosphere at Mount Justice is considerably brighter when he returns the next morning, which is an environment he could really use right now.
Everyone is crowded inside the spacious but considerably small (in comparison to the rest of the mountain, anyway) infirmary. Most likely all of the mentors stayed overnight, or just got back before him, because all the same people are there in the room.
Their injuries are thankfully not fatal. There are definitely cuts and bruises, a few somewhat deep gashes to their sides (Artemis), a broken arm (Kaldur), a sprained ankle (Wally); but they're a tough group of kids, so it's close to nothing to them. The only one considerably banged up is M'gann, who is lying almost completely still in her bed. Bandages wind around most of her form, but a smile is there on her face.
Conner seems like a wreck, emotionally speaking, and he sympathizes with the boy. M'gann jumped in front of Cheshire, purposefully taking the blow, and he had a feeling it's because she knows.
So, it's pretty much his fault, too.
"Alright," Wally says, "Roy's here, now it's a party! Hey, did you bring—ow!" He throws a hand over his ankle as Artemis mutters, "Idiot," under her breath.
"Kid, look, you're not really helping my cause here," Barry says. "Iris and your folks are already out to get me for letting you get shoved around."
Artemis snickers as Wally protests, "I did not get shoved around! And is that the only reason you're visiting? To save yourself?" Barry laughs. "You could at least bring some donuts or something."
The older speedster winks and gives a thumbs-up before zipping out of the room.
"What's the matter? Is the outside world a less interesting place without me?" Dick jokes, earning a laugh from Cassie and Diana, and an amused smirk from Bruce.
"Always, Rob," he chuckles, turning to Wally to add, "Sorry, but I didn't bring food for you, man."
"Poor baby," Artemis teases, a smug smile crossing her face when the speedster scoffs loudly. Ollie laughs from her bedside.
"It was thoughtful of you to come at all," Kaldur assures, grabbing his attention, and he walks up to the Atlantean and the two bump fists.
Orin places a firm hand on his shoulder. "It's good to see you, Roy. It's been a while."
"Yeah, well," he exhales, his mind wandering back to Jade. She was sitting on the couch putting her hair up into a ponytail, a fresh mug of coffee and some foreign black and white film playing, when he had left the apartment. He's not assured that she's going to laze around the house all day, and neither are on speaking terms for the moment after last night. "I've been otherwise preoccupied."
In the bed beside them, Suzie tilts her head slightly and asks him, "Is there something bothering you, then? Something we can help you with?"
"You know we're always here for you," Hal adds. "Just if you need anything, don't be afraid to ask."
He opens his mouth to respond, only to be cut off as the door bursts open again and Barry is standing in the middle of the room with three large boxes of donuts in hand. "Anyone hungry?"
'Saved by the bell,' he thinks to himself before walking over to the speedster and opening the top box. He could really go for some breakfast right about now.
... ...
"Roy, can you hear me?"
His hand pauses briefly over the box as he reaches for his third donut, and he grabs it and hopes no one noticed his flinch. When he looks at M'gann, she is tearing a piece of her own donut, but when he asks, "Is there anyone else on this line?" he sees her shake her head a little, widen her eyes, and then dismiss it when Conner asks her if something was wrong.
"It's just us," she assures. "I did have to tell Uncle J'onn to not listen in, though, so I'm sorry. I don't mean to intrude, but I… I needed to know."
"I have a feeling you already do," he admits after a short pause.
"Cheshire… her thoughts were pretty loud, and when I heard, I wasn't sure what to believe. But knowing that she might really be… pregnant, I couldn't just let Conner…"
She doesn't finish that sentence and he's glad. He wants to pretend like he doesn't know how close it had been.
"So that means it's true, then? You and Cheshire are really having a…" The word is left unsaid, and it feels strange that she's having a hard time saying it. "Why haven't you told any of us yet?"
"There's no easy way to break news like this."
"We're your friends, Roy. You know that we're going to be here for you."
He expects her to say more but she doesn't, so he just munches on his donut and looks around the room. Everyone is blissfully oblivious to their mental conversation, which is kind of the point, but for a brief second part of him wonders what the reaction would be if they had heard M'gann. It would save him the trouble of doing it himself.
"Hey, Roy," she says after a few minutes have passed. "Can I ask you a question?" He meets her eyes from across the room and she takes it as a yes because she continues with, "Are you keeping it?"
"What?"
"I mean," she rushes to add, "Are you planning on raising your baby together or… It's none of my business, but… Do you want to become a family with her?"
He looks away from her gaze, and even if she doesn't say it out loud, her voice seems like a hesitant whisper as she asks, "Do you love her?"
He takes another bite and doesn't answer.
... ...
When he gets back to the apartment, Jade is there in workout clothes doing stretches atop a yoga mat he didn't know she owned, another film (Vietnamese with subtitles, and in color this time) playing.
Her left leg is stretched out and her right leg is bent so that her foot is tucked underneath her, hands braced against the mat as she is twisted to the right. He kind of just watches her for a minute because she's flexible and he knows this, but she's stretching just to stretch and it's just weird to see her doing something relatively normal.
She looks over her shoulder at him and has this half-smirk kind of smile on her face, like she's just noticed he returned. She is—was—an assassin and assassins notice things, so he doesn't buy it.
"How are your little sidekick friends?" she asks. He narrows his eyes. No, he's not at all surprised she figured out where he disappeared to. Not much surprises him when it comes to her these days.
"Fine," he mumbles. "M'gann knows."
"I kind of figured that when she jumped in front of that boyfriend of hers," she exhales in a laugh, and her eyes are kind of dangerous when she adds, "I thought we finished this discussion last night."
"We did. This is a different discussion." She arches an eyebrow but twists away from him, shifting so that her spine is straight and the balls and heels of her feet are pressed together. He waits for her to place her hands over her feet before continuing with, "What's your plan after this? Are you keeping her?"
"Was last night not clear enough for you, or these past few weeks? I—"
"Not that." He pulls off his mask and walks over to her, arms crossed over his chest. "You're not considering adoption, are you?"
She glares at him. "What are you getting at?"
"I'm talking about a family for her, or him," he says. "Our child deserves it, but is that something we can provide for her ourselves? Or were you going to take her for yourself, is that the plan?"
She kind of gives him this look that seems like he's hurt her. It pisses him off that all it takes is that look for him to start feeling guilty about discussing this. "There is no plan!" she snaps, getting up. "I'm not going to toss around ideas with you of how to get rid of our child, Roy."
"I don't mean it like that," he argues. "But you said so yourself, she shouldn't have to go through this, suffer consequences because of us."
She puts her hands on her hips and kind of narrows her eyes at him but doesn't actually say anything back. She's a very smart woman, he knows she is. He's sure that this issue has crossed her mind before now, but the Jade standing in front of him isn't acting like the Jade he knows. She looks almost as desperate as he feels, like she hates the idea of giving up their baby as much as he does.
And, if he'll be perfectly honest with himself, he kind of hates the idea of losing her.
"This is a shitty situation," he says, and he's not sure if he's talking about their child or just them in general, but he says it because regardless, it's very true.
Her eyes don't seem as dark as he knows them to be when she looks at him and mumbles, "Yes," in this small voice, and he thinks that maybe she might hate the idea of losing him, too.
... ...
They don't bring it up again. They're going to have to eventually, but it's kind of an unspoken agreement that it'll wait until later. So they fall into this kind of normal routine where they pretend like there's absolutely nothing wrong with this situation and they just focus on revolving themselves around the baby.
"By the way," she says as she sits herself on the countertop beside where he is pouring his coffee, a stack of mail in hand, "this came the other night."
He would've asked why she didn't tell him sooner but they only now are on speaking terms since their argument that night so that's probably why.
"Tossed out all the junk mail," she continues, "so it's just bills now. Nothing interesting except for this," she adds, sticking a thick, cream-colored envelope in front of his face. He takes it from her and she snatches his mug from him before he can set it down, sipping.
"I'm surprised you didn't open it."
He misses the look she shoots him (well, he knows it's there, just chooses to ignore it) and flips it over. He recognizes the same fancy script that was used for Ollie and Dinah's celebratory engagement dinner and assumes this is the save-the-date Cassie had called about a few weeks ago. Sure enough, there is a jade green invitation with a bow and cursive font on the inside with the information.
The wedding is in six months. "That was fast," he mumbles aloud without realizing it.
"Didn't they just get engaged less than two months ago?"
He answers, "Yes," before pausing to think of how she knows this. Then he remembers this is Jade and she probably does a lot of snooping. As long as she knows that it's Oliver Queen and Dinah Lance that are getting married, not Green Arrow and Black Canary, he's going to let it slide for now.
"They in a rush?"
"You could say that." He slips the invitation back in, and his hand unintentionally falls onto her bare thigh, just above her knee. "It's in six months."
"I saw," she replies, taking another sip. Then she kind of arches her eyebrow like she's catching onto something and adds too casually, "I'll be very pregnant then. Do you plan on going alone?"
"And leave you and the baby? No."
"But you're still going?"
"Of course." He takes his mug back and pretends like he doesn't catch the smirk on her face.
He shakes his head and brings the rim of the mug up to his lips, making eye contact with her as he drinks. Then she tosses her head back and laughs in that sultry voice of hers, hooking her leg around his hip and yanking him towards her. His coffee spills a bit onto her thigh before he can put his mug down but she doesn't even flinch at the temperature, just wraps her legs around his waist.
"Always trying to be the hero," she says flippantly.
And it doesn't register to him that he just agreed to take Jade to the wedding because she has her lips over his and a hand through his hair before he can stop it. Not that he would have, but still.
... ...
He goes with her to a check-up because it's overdue, and the kind of smile that forms on Dr. Kyle's face when she sees Jade gives it away.
"Jade," she greets, extending her arm, and he half expects the two women to hug. Instead, she places her hand on Jade's shoulder and looks at him. "This must be the father."
"Roy Harper," he introduces. "Nice to meet you."
She shakes his hand and tells him, "Pleasure's all mine," in a tone that suggests she probably knows more than he thinks she does.
He looks to Jade for some sort of explanation, but she just shrugs and lets Dr. Kyle lead them into a room. Jade strips off her sweatshirt and hops onto the reclined chair, lying down and pulling her black tank up so that the flat of her stomach is exposed. Dr. Kyle takes a minute or two to prep the equipment and pull on a pair of gloves before wheeling her chair between Jade and the computers.
He moves to stand beside Jade and is slightly surprised when she sucks in a small gasp as the gel hits her skin. He chuckles and she shoots a glare at him, which Dr. Kyle laughs at.
"Sorry. Probably should have warned you," she chimes in.
Jade rolls her eyes. "Not like I've been hit by anything worse, of course," she mumbles, causing Dr. Kyle to smirk.
"Of course." Dr. Kyle picks up the rod and presses it to Jade's stomach, rolling it gently along her skin and watching the image on the monitor constantly shift.
He wasn't sure how he expects Jade to react to this. He knows this isn't her first ultrasound even if it's his first, but when he looks over at her, she is looking at the monitor that with this sort of shine in her eyes that he believes nothing less of becoming a mother could bring out of her.
"Well, here's your baby," Dr. Kyle announces.
The image on the screen is kind of fuzzy and dark and alive with motion, but he has no trouble making out the profile of a head on this small little lump of a body and it's kind of amazing.
He doesn't know when Jade slipped her hand into his, but she squeezes it without really noticing because when he looks down at her, her eyes are still glued to the screen. He just runs the pad of his thumb over her knuckles and looks back at the monitor. He can hear Dr. Kyle moving around a little but the sound of a steady thrumming suddenly fills the room and grabs his attention.
"Your baby's heartbeat," Dr. Kyle supplies when he looks at Jade. "Jade's heard it faintly before."
"It's beautiful," he mumbles. There are so many things running through his head right now, but those two words were the only things that formed properly and they sure as hell sum up his thoughts.
"Yeah," Jade whispers, just loud enough for him to hear, and he looks down and doesn't miss the smile that graces her face when she repeats, "beautiful," in a low murmur.
It's her most beautiful smile yet, and his favorite. He may have to tell her that someday.
... ...
Dr. Kyle gives them pictures of the sonogram and recording of the heartbeat, and has them schedule their next visit before they leave.
He takes Jade out for a late lunch afterward (he took the day off) and the closest thing is Bibbo's diner, but after living for so long off of takeout, fast food, and anything instant, he figures a restaurant meal is in order. They end up eating at an Italian place after driving around for a few minutes, and a waitress compliments them on being a beautiful couple before taking their orders.
"She so wants a tip," Jade says once the waitress is out of earshot.
He laughs. That's totally a Jade thing to say.
She smirks and puts her elbow on the table and her chin in her hand, looking around.
She spends the few minutes it takes their meals to come to comment on just about everyone in the restaurant. He would have told her it was rude and whatnot, except he knows she could care less. He doesn't mean to encourage her by laughing at everything she points out, but whatever, it's not a crime if he finds it amusing.
"I'm going to hate maternity clothes," she says while they're eating. She dips a chunk of her garlic bread in the pasta sauce and takes a bite. "I'll start to show soon."
"Dr. Kyle says you should be wearing them now."
"Yup."
"Should I take you shopping then?"
"No need. I've already gone," she informs. "I had to do something to get out of the apartment while you were at work, you know."
She looks up at him through her long eyelashes and he notices that shine in her eyes again. He's been seeing it a lot recently, like during the ultrasound.
"Where are you getting this money from?" He's been meaning to ask her, since he's noticed small things like the fact that their fridge and cupboards never seem to look empty for more than a day at a time, or the fact that more books keep appearing on the entertainment set shelves.
"I had a life before you," she reminds, sounding amused. "There's a lot of money saved up from all of the past jobs I've taken. I didn't steal anything, if that's what you're implying."
He wasn't, but being a hero and dating one of the Shadow's most elite assassins, it makes the little guilt he feels for their situation even less, so that must mean something.
"Good to know."
She laughs again, lighter this time, and starts talking about her second trimester.
Their waitress overhears the tail end of this conversation and looks a little excited, like she won a bet, and congratulates them. She offers them any dessert they want and doesn't charge them for it (they see this later when they ask for the bill), and it isn't until there's a slice of tiramisu sitting between them and they're taking turns eating when he realizes that this is pretty much their first date.