(You want it, you got it baby. XD)
… OH… MY… GOD…
Ed: What's with her?
Pride (Edward from Why Does Love Hurt?) I don't know, she got a message from one of her reviewers stating that she was suppose to update this story after she got three reviews, and right now she has nine.
So… many… reviews…
Ed: Ri? You okay?
YES! Can you believe it?! This is awesome! I'm not only loved for my mpreg for YGO, but FMA as well! I can't believe that this silly story and the one-shot that created it are so popular! I mean, I'm more known for being a YGO fanfic mpreg writer, but thanks to these stories I'm now making a name for my self here! HAHAHAHAHA!!!!! (Looks over at Pride and Ed and does not like the looks they are giving her) Sorry… I'm just so happy.
Ed/ Pride: We got the picture.
Okay. I own nothing but the baby and the plot, as well as this version of Pride-Ed, but he is from a different story and that one is an Elricest story. So could some of you be nice enough to please review it for me. I would like some more people to take a look at it and tell me what you think.
Ed: Senseless advertisement?
Senseless advertisement… (Bows head and Pride just pats her back)
Pride: You poor, poor, doomed child. WELP! (Slaps her back and smirks) ON WITH THE FIC!
--
Edward's Knocked Up
© RiYuYami
Chapter two: Not a doctor!
--
My poor tummy… its killing me because of this sick… thingy going on with in it.
And I'm too much of an egotist and coward to even set foot in a doctor's office. But Roy said that if I was still sick after a week I would have to go, but he kinda put off taking me for about a few weeks. I think it might have been about four or five weeks ago, but what do I know, I'm face down on the cold bathroom floor with a huge puddle of drool coming from my mouth… man I would love to have some banana yogurt right now.
OH! And maybe some buns smothered in sauce and… note to self, stop listening to Al. (1)
"You okay brother?"
Holy hell in a hand basket, where did those huge eyes come from?
Oh wait… that's Al.
"I want to die…" I moaned as I turned over, looking up at my brother.
"You can't do that right now, we are going somewhere." I sat right up for this with a grin on my face.
"Really?! Where?!" Al had some sorta sly look on his face, uh oh…
--
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO (gasp) OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"
"Are you done?"
"Wait… OOOOOOOOOOOO! Okay, now I am."
Well, this is a rare site to see. Edward Elric, probably the most feared alchemist in the state, is screaming and shouting like an upset and pissed little five year old being carried into the doctor's office by his 'dad' and 'mom' but replace dad and mom with Roy Mustang and Alphonse Elric and you can see what I'm going through pretty clearly.
My own brother and lover… how in the name of fuck could they betray me like this? They know very clearly that I detest hospitals and doctors, except Winry's parents and Dr. Marco (AN: Is that his name? I can't remember to well, but I think Scar tried to kill him in the manga) are pretty cool so they don't count.
As Roy and Al signed me in, I quickly snatched a really nice looking pen covered in stripes to play with for a while when we wait because I hate being bored.
As I finished a really cool doodle of a flamel on my boot as well as the plots to hurt Al and Roy, the nurse told us to go in. I walked in first and say some brunet with a pony tail in her hair. She wore glasses in front of her blue-green eyes, she looked to be about two inches taller then myself and she was smiling at me.
"Hello I'm Dr. Kurcka and you must be…" She looked at her chart. "Edward Elric, oh, I've heard of you. You're the Fullmetal Alchemist, nice to meet you Edward." She smiled as she shook my human hand.
"Hello madam." I mumbled, but I say a chain attached to one of her belt loops and it went into her pocket, was she…?
"Please have a seat so I can check you." She patted the table and I jumped on. "Please take off your boots and your jacket." She spoke as she had her back turned to me. I blushed; this meant that she would see my automail. But I can't say no because I really want to see what's wrong with me. I did as I was told and Dr. Kurcka blinked.
"Oh, I guess this is why they call you the "Fullmetal Alchemist" then, am I right honey?" The older woman smiled as I nodded. I told her about was wrong and she took in this information. She then took my normal wrist and held onto it, checking my pulse. She nodded when she was done and then she did a bunch of other things, but I screamed and shouted when she asked to check my weight and height.
"Edward Elric, you get on that scale now or do you want me to make you!?" Al yelled at me, and I obeyed with out a word. Dr. Kurcka wrote down the information and I wish she didn't read it out loud. "Well, your weight is about 189 pounds, most likely from the automail and your muscular form. And you are about 4 foot 9 and…"
"HOW ARE YOU CALLING THE SMALLEST ALCHEMIST IN THE SOLAR SYSTEM!?" I yelled.
The group was quiet except for the slapping between the contact of Roy's hand and his forehead.
"Sorry, but I'm a little… sensitive to my height." I nervously and embarrassingly grinned at the brunette woman who only nodded. "Okay, now Edward, I need you to take of your shirt."
Now Roy was not too happy about this and Al had to stop him from burning the poor woman. I lay down on the table and she started to push into my stomach area. "Umm… what are you doing?"
"Checking to rule out any tumors or abnormalities." Dr. Kurcka said as she pushed on a spot right under my belly button and I squealed. "That's fucking hurt!" I yelled. Dr. Kurcka blinked.
"Hang on; I think I might have a good idea as to why you are having all these problems." She put on a stereoscope and placed it on my stomach and she smiled with a blush when she placed it on the spot. "Ed, put this on and tell me what you hear."
I looked at her and did as I was told and I heard something that was odd and yet familiar. "What, what is it Dr. Kurcka?" I asked, not liking that smile she had on her face. She patted my stomach and continued to smile.
"Edward Elric, you are the first male in known history to be… pregnant."
The room was quiet, Roy was quiet, Al was quiet, Dr. Kurcka was quiet, and I was… well, for a brief second before I lunged at the older woman.
--
"Edward, I swear, if you even try that again I will give you a shot right up your ass young man! And it will be with a twenty millimeter needle too!"
"Sorry…"
The office was slightly trashed and there were a few ripped up books that I had thrown at Dr. Kurcka who now had me strapped to a chair thanks to alchemy. Curse her for being a state alchemist in plants, curse her!
As she repaired her books and office she informed me and the others with a theory as to why I now have a newly discovered uterus with in me.
"Well I now alchemy, which is lucky for you, and I think that you may have gotten this new organ from a rebound that infected your body and not the surrounding area. Did you do something that may have caused this? Never mind, the point is that you need to be careful with this because the male part of the species can not get pregnant and you don't know what kind of effects it could cause. Try not to get into any missions and Mustang," She looked from me to Roy. "You had better keep him from doing anything stupid, same with you Al."
Both Roy and Al nodded and I snorted. "I won't do anything stupid, I know better then that." They just glared at me.
"Anyway Edward, I think you will start to show in about three weeks because from what I can tell you are about eight weeks in."
"Why?"
"Because of your body shape and height."
SLAM-CRACK!
Dr. Kurcka slapped my head. I broke her desk in half and she then repaired it. Maybe I should be more careful from now on…
TBC
--
Are you all happy now?
Next chapter: Edward starts his life being pregnant and word soon gets out. Someone is going to make a surprise appearance.
Review or I'll hit you with Sean Connery.