"Pippin!"
Ithilhen's face lit up as he recognized the Hobbit before him. He jumped to his feet with open arms, letting his fiddle drop to the edge of the fountain where he had been sitting with another.
Caught up the rush of excitement, Pippin dashed over and tossed his arms around the dark haired elf, almost knocking him back in to the fountain with a startled 'oof.' Ithilhen kept his balance and wrapped his own arms around the Hobbit, laughing breathlessly.
"Yallume! Nae saian luume', Pippin!" Ithilhen exclaimed as he moved his hands to Pippin's shoulders, pulling away to get a look at his friend, who tilted his head in question. The elf chuckled. "It has been too long my friend." He sighed with a wide smile.
Pippin beamed, cheeks flushed. His eyes examined the elf before him. The first thing he had noticed was Ithilhen's accent was nearly gone from his much more muted voice. Which was a bit saddening. It had been odd for an elf, but it seemed to fit… The next was the overly clean way he was dressed – hair braided back over his pointed ears, fancy and restricting blue and purple robes replacing the rustic ones from before…
And finally his eyes – still as pale as the moon, crinkled with laughter and honest happiness, but weary and dim. Pippin could feel his heart break a little at the memory behind those eyes, keeping his smile strong despite it.
Ithilhen was sizing up the Hobbit before him, before letting out a breath. "You've grown tall!" He exclaimed, moving his hand above Pippin's head in shock. Pippin blinked, having not realized that he was indeed taller, not feeling quite as small next to the elf. Ithilhen turned his eyes up to the rest of the Hobbits, who stood grinning a short way away. "Ah!" He blushed a bit and stepped back, bowing his head to them. "Mellon en melloneamin, I am glad to see you all are well. Come, sit!" He turned his head to the other elf, apologizing. The elf shook his head and laughed.
"Tenna' telwan. Until later." The other elf stood and bowed before leaving the company.
Ithilhen smiled sheepishly before sitting back on the edge of the fountain, joined by the Hobbits taking seats around him. Stories were struck up immediately – first, of course, Ithilhen had to finish his tale of the murderous Redcap. Then it was his turn to listen to the adventure the four told, eye wide with awe. Each had their own part to tell, and by the end, the sun was nearly set and the elf sat bewildered.
"In all my years, I'd never thought I'd hear something so amazing…!" Ithilhen breathed, shaking his head. "And you all had me tell my story first. Now it seems to barely hold a flame – truly amazing." The elf laughed and tried to wrap his mind around their tale. The Hobbits smiled tiredly, exhausted from the storytelling. It seemed so much grander when they spoke it, compared to the horrors of living it.
Frodo stretched and yawned. Sam was stricken by the yawn next, then Merry and Pippin.
Ithilhen laughed quietly. "I should not have kept you." He apologized with a smile. "I'll let you rest now."
Pippin frowned beside him. "I'm not tired." He protested, though a yawn struggled out of his mouth. Merry chuckled. "Come on, you'll sleep all day tomorrow if we don't get some rest." Sam and Frodo waved their farewells as they departed.
"Quel kaima." Ithilhen called after them, before turning back to Pippin, who shook his head. "Just a few more minutes and I'll come to bed." He pleaded, and Merry rolled his eyes. The elf smirked at the two.
"I won't tell you what to do!" Merry exclaimed dramatically. As he turned to leave, he gave a friendly goodbye to Ithilhen, who waved back and wished him a well rest. Pippin stayed seated beside him quietly.
"Mellonamin, you may leave if you wish." Ithilhen turned back to his Hobbit friend. "If you are tired I don't want to keep you…" He tilted his head with a light frown.
"No, I… I still wanted to talk...!" Pippin rushed to say. "I mean, I wanted to ask…" His lips twisted as he struggled with how he would word his question. With a huff, he decided to start with something else that was on his mind.
"When… When you left, that last night. Why didn't you say goodbye?"
The question wasn't what Ithilhen had expected, blinking in shock. "Oh." He muttered. "I… Suppose I do owe an explanation." His gaze dropped to his hands, folded on his lap. "I am so sorry for that. Sorry for everything, really."
Ithilhen forced his gaze back up to meet Pippin's blue eyes, his own welling up. "I wanted nothing more than to say I was sorry for everything that happened. It was my fault, the whole ordeal… And I dragged you in to it." He paused to swallow down his tears. "You should not have suffered through it. I was selfish, having Yara bring help. I dragged you in to my problem, one you had nothing to do with." The elf's head dropped back down, his hands balling in to fists. "If I could make it right I would… And I left because… I didn't want to face what my own foolishness had done to you… I was ashamed, but I did not want to say goodbye, either. I was selfish."
Pippin was stunned as the elf's teary confession. The poor creature was racked with misplaced guilt, blaming himself for the horrible things that had happened in that bandit camp. He sat there quietly as Ithilhen continued.
"I…" He took a breath to settle his trembling shoulders. "…I came here to get away from it all. From the pain and the… the thoughts that won't leave. Staying with you and your friends was never an option." He shrugged his shoulders and let out a broken laugh. "Besides, you wouldn't need a druid who can't handle a few bandits." His gaze darted back to Pippin before returning to the ground.
Pippin frowned sadly at his broken friend. He may have kept himself quiet when Ithilhen needed comfort all those months ago, but he would not now. The Hobbit reached out and grabbed the elf's hand, heart falling at the slight flinch. Ithilhen hesitated before returning the gesture, squeezing the small hand back. It was halfhearted, and not enough.
"…Please don't say that." Pippin said, his voice quiet and sad. His eyes stung a bit at the look in those pale, wet eyes – guilty and hopeless, they plead for an answer. "Please don't think it was your fault… Or that you deserved what happened." The words didn't come easily to him, but he pushed through.
His eyes locked with Ithilhen's, though they flicked about uneasily, struggling to keep eye contact. Pippin took his hand away, slowly now. The elf seemed to relax a bit, eyes falling back on Pippin as his shoulders slumped feebly.
"…I'm glad I met you." Pippin spoke softly. "You are not at all selfish - You were scared. I was scared too!" He sighed at the memory of just how terrifying it all ways. But it seemed so far away after everything else that had happened. "But so what that we were scared. That doesn't make it any more our faults. The only ones who did wrong were those… terrible men." They both held back shudders at the mention. "…And every day I'm thankful for what you gave up to protect me from that." Pippin's throat felt dry as his tears sprung up. Ithilhen half laughed, half sobbed, turning his head away.
"Oh Pippin, your words are kind, yet I still feels unclean." Ithilhen sighed as a tear escaped his eyes. "Tell me, do you think an elf's heart heals as quickly as his body?" His eyes looked as though they wanted an answer, but he spoke again before he could get one. "My body is almost clean of the wounds that they left… But I can still feel them. Every cut, every whip, every… touch…" His eyes clenched shut against the thoughts. "It feels like my mind itself is beyond repair. I barely made it through this first year, how will the next be any better?" Ithilhen's shoulders trembled again as more tears rolled down his tan cheeks. "Pippin… My friend… With all the years in the world, I don't think I'll ever heal."
Pippin paused, something he'd heard once returning to him.
"You remember Gandalf, don't you?" He suddenly asked, receiving a perplexed and teary eyed look from Ithilhen, but he nodded anyway. "He once told me… 'Time doesn't heal all wounds – it's what you do with that time.'"
Ithilhen tilted his head at this, thinking about its meaning. He hummed in thought and nodded in understanding. "But… what can I do? The elves here have treated my wounds and given me things to do. They keep my mind busy so I don't focus on the pain and fear, but still they come back." His brow furrowed. Pippin sighed with a frown. "Have they… talked about it with you?" He offered, to which Ithilhen shook his head. "Besides telling them of the cause of my injuries, they… avoid talking about it…"
"Not talking about it won't make it go away." Pippin mumbled. "Perhaps… We should find someone who will help you through this?" He frowned in thought, but Ithilhen shifted nervously. "…Couldn't I just talk to you?" He muttered. From the reaction of the elves who knew, he hated to think of telling anyone else.
Pippin smirked and shook his head. "I will always listen, but… I'm just a Hobbit! I can't give you everything you'll need…" Ithilhen frowned unhappily. "But you are my friend. And I can give you that." This pulled a smile from the elf, his body relaxing further and a thankful look crossing his face.
"Brave little Hobbit. I am glad I met you, too." Ithilhen chuckled gently, reaching out to pull Pippin in to a rather desperate hug. He buried his pointed nose in his shoulder and sighed heavily, the (not so little anymore) Hobbit doing the same.
They stayed embraced for some time, before pulling apart as Pippin yawned widely, shoulders bunching up. Ithilhen grinned. "Go to bed now, Pippin. We can talk more in the morning. Or whenever you decide to wake up."
Pippin laughed and stood to leave. "Good night, Ithilhen." He said softly.
"Good night. Tenna' tul're."
The last chapter of this short fic will be posted soon. Sorry for the short wait :)