* Bioware owns the characters. :(

As I sat there listening to Hawke begin her story, I wanted nothing else than to tear my own chest hair out. I should have known. I'm not daft. Yet, she and Rivaini both got the best of all of us. This all began when Rivaini sauntered over to my table one fine night at the Hanged Man. She usually avoided me; for fear that I'd scare off potential mates. Could you blame the poor bastards that were too afraid to compete with me? I tell you, if you could look at me you'd never want anyone else. But again I digress…

Rivaini wanted to play a game. Diamondback she said, but without coin (Maker knows we didn't have much to spare). No, she wanted to play for truths. Being Rivaini, I agreed. The only truths she'd want would either involve a bed or… well who am I kidding? They'd only involve a bed and at least one warm body. So, she starts by asking Corff to bring us ale all night. She paid for it too! That should have been when an alarm should have gone off…but, well all the free ale I can have…and my mind was on other things (mainly drinking as much as I could).

I beat Rivaini the first couple of games…got some pretty juicy stories that are sure to come up later in this tale but let's just get to my main point today.

Rivaini beats me half way through our game and asks me if I have any land in the Free Marches. I had about half of the tavern's ale in me at that point. The only question I feared was being asked who Bianca was, but when she asked me about an uninteresting parcel of land… well, I was more than happy to oblige. I laughed it off…told her I had a little cottage up on a mountain in … well for the sake of this story, let's just say it was in faraway place. We continued our game and I went to sleep as happy as a Darkspawn and a Grey Warden going at it (maybe not with swords if you get my meaning…why else would they always sense each other…please).

Little did I know that this was all part of Hawke's plan.

This was how Hawke's deceit began and I was responsible.

I'm pretty sure you all know of the juicy tale between her and the elf. The one night they spent together. Bastards tried to hide it from us, but our Rivaini knew as soon as she saw them. Lucky for us, Rivaini is not one to hide a secret. We had our fun. Poked them a bit too much. They couldn't stand to look at each other after that. I had my doubts that Hawke and the elf wanted nothing more than to repeat that night after our taunts. I also had my doubts that Hawke was not the one who put a stop to those wanted touches.

A month passed and Hawke announces to us that she has to go do something. No bullshit! That's what she said… "I have to go do something." Can we get any more obscure Hawke?

We all begged like little prissy babies to go with her into the Free Marches. Only to have her deny every single one of our pleas. The only one that didn't ask was the damn elf; the only one I'm sure she would have taken. So off she goes in a stupid white horse. The lucky steed being the only one she wanted. Now we tried to go after her…don't get me wrong…but Rivaini stopped us. Told us that Hawke had to figure shit out.

As soon as she said that we all looked at the elf who clenched his hands and brooded all the way home like the little piggy he was. So we all thought she left us there in Kirkwall like stepchildren to go out into the wild and dance naked under the moon to try and forget about the elf. Little did I know that this was the last thing from her mind.

Little did I know that Hawke was going to make a decision: Have the elf's child? Or abort it?